Authors: Cristin Harber
Tags: #contemporary romance, #military romance, #Romantic Suspense, #New adult, #hacker, #motorcycle
She didn’t want him to be her white knight, but something was off in a big way.
“Just a co-worker.” The guy threw up his hands, standing down to Matt’s brutish nature and physical size.
“You know this guy?” His hand clasped to her shoulder.
“We’ve met once.”
Matt’s jealous rage glared off of his face. “Get in the truck, peaches.”
She scurried away, unnerved that Phiber had been in her real-life world, though perhaps that was bound to happen eventually. Matt joined her in the truck, slammed the gear into drive, and sped off.
“You know that guy?” he asked again, distrust in his voice.
“I think we’ve worked on a project before. Or something. He recognized me, I guess. I didn’t at first.”
“Why’d you rush away from him?”
“I didn’t.”
“He the kind of guy you
like
to put out for? That nerd screamed computer boy.”
She winced. “No, it’s not like that.”
“So you didn’t want me to see him with you.”
“Matt, really, it’s not like that. I promise.” But what was it like? Her eyes closed, and she recalled that scary, hungry look in Phiber’s eyes.
“I’m not a jealous guy, peaches. But I swear to shit, you push me.”
“I know you’re not,” she lied. Damn it. She could barely run from one guy, and now another had unnerved her? “I’ll put a roast on, and everything will be fine. I was just caught off guard.”
Her stomach turned, but the more she thought about running into Phiber, the more she didn’t trust her reaction. It had been completely over the top. Matt was making her paranoid. Really, the people she worked with were loners who did
not
do well with normal interactions. Couple Matt rushing up behind her when she backed away, and the guy was probably scared to death. The whole thing was harmless.
“A roast sounds great.”
“Great.”
His eyes roamed over her body, making her feel more like a trophy than a person. “You know, Lexi, you’re the only girl who’s ever going to be in my world.”
The words were sweet, but the tone was a threat. “Of course.”
“You and that damn dog. Safe as long as we’re together.”
CHAPTER FIVE
The day had come and gone. Matt had headed out with some guys from the neighborhood, leaving her alone to stare at the empty backpack that she could easily pack and leave with. Two days had passed since she’d run into Phiber, and for those two days, Matt had treated her like a queen. His distrust had melted away the second they arrived at home. He didn’t make any moves on her and told her everything she cooked was delicious. The guy even threw a load of laundry in the wash. He apologized over and over for being a dick, saying that he couldn’t imagine a life without her in it and sometimes his temper and jealousy got the best of him.
It was all bullshit.
Right?
Why did she even doubt?
I’m so sorry. I hurt you. I shouldn’t have. I love you, peaches.
Her stomach turned—she hated the nickname peaches—yet, staring at the empty bag, she couldn’t begin to decide what to pack or where to go. She exhaled, hating and doubting herself. She rubbed her head and wondered what her breaking point was if it hadn’t been passed already?
Enough. Lexi tried to concentrate on Monarch. If she sold it for what Shadow was banking on, then they could quietly put that money into her savings account, and maybe she could just disappear. By the time she came back from wherever she’d hidden, Matt would have moved on. Maybe.
Bacon jumped into her lap, and she rubbed her sweet head. “I won’t let anything happen to you, sweet little Bacon Byte.”
Bacon sneezed and wheezed—wow, Lexi needed to help her rescued little pug lose some poundage. Somehow the dog had become her best friend. She chatted with Bacon, cuddled her as if the dog was the cure to Matt. As if she didn’t need to fear being alone when she had the pup in her arms.
“You and me, Bacon.” Then she kissed Bacon’s furry head and went back to work.
Screen after screen, Monarch was beautiful. The program she’d designed was just like its namesake, starting as something fragile and maybe even ugly. But this was a work of technological art. Strong. Gorgeous. Smart. It was—
A crash rattled in the backyard. Her heart sank. Matt was back, and that was his truck backing into the recycling bin. A dead giveaway of how much he’d had to drink. The truck door opened and slammed, then Lexi heard him curse the trash can for being there. Where it always was. Guess Mister Nice Doting Fiancé was gone. Big surprise.
Maybe he’d come in and rant over a game of pool lost. Maybe he’d come in and demand dinner at—she checked her phone—one in the morning. Whatever he did, she prayed he’d pass out sooner rather than later, ideally on the couch so she wouldn’t have to hear his drunk snores.
Their back door crashed open, and he spilled himself inside. Her body went rigid. Even though she knew she should go meet him, she didn’t move. Maybe she could pretend to be asleep.
Lexi jumped up when she heard him kick the kitchen trash can. It scattered across the floor as she dove into bed. Just another trash can she’d replace without comment. They seemed to always break. Often.
“We gotta go to bed, Bacon.” She snagged the covers and buried them both in deep. Her pup licked her face, and she tried to shush her. “Sleep.”
“Lexi!”
She held her breath and squeezed her eyes shut.
I’m asleep, I’m asleep, I’m asleep…
“Peaches, where the fuck you at?”
Go to sleep—
Her bedroom door swung open and bounced off the wall. Bile simmered in her stomach, inched into her throat.
Don’t be an asshole tonight…
Matt wandered into their bathroom, leaving a trail of clothes. The stench of the bar permeated the room. Cigarette smoke gave her migraines, and even on his clothes, his hair, his breath, it made her sick. The bathroom toilet flushed, and Matt staggered in the darkness. She couldn’t see him but knew the haphazard, staggering steps he took toward their bed. Thank God he was passing out.
The covers tore off her. “You sleepin’?”
The sound in his voice made her want to vomit. There was something mixed in with the drunkenness and lust. He’d promised never again to take her like before. Said it was a mistake, that she had caused it but that he shouldn’t have done it. Most certainly tonight, she had caused nothing.
“Sleeping, Matt.”
“Roll over.” He grabbed Bacon and threw her.
“Matt!”
“I’m gonna kill that dog if you love it more than me. Stuff its fat ass and put it in the living room to remind you.”
Tears burned her eyes as she remembered when he’d forced her to have sex days ago. She had two options. One was over faster than the other. One left bruises on her hips and the insides of her thighs and came with a day’s worth of him explaining why he’d had to do what he did. If push came to it, the lesser of two evils—sex with her fiancé—would happen. She’d been so stupid, stupid, stupid not to leave earlier.
“I was sleeping, baby,” she mumbled, praying that it mattered this time. Her arms mentally reached for Bacon to make sure she was okay. “Tomorrow? Please?”
It didn’t matter.
His hands ran over her shirt, pulling it over her head even as she tried to glue her ear to the pillow. “Love that body. All mine. Don’t make me take what I need.”
“No, Matt.”
Bacon jumped on the bed, snarling, and Matt grabbed her. He threw her again, but this time out the door, which he closed with a slam.
“Said I was sleeping, baby.”
“Are you trying to make me mad?” He crawled into bed. “Let’s go.”
Lexi swallowed her dread. It would hurt. God, it was disgusting. Him panting, breathing, sweating. But it was so much faster.
I’m done. This is the last time.
She’d make it through the night then figure things out. How would she leave when she had been wormed away from family and friends?
She tried to redirect him. “Did you have fun tonight?”
His fingers pinched her side, making her yelp. “Sound like I want to talk?”
Tears seeped silently down her cheeks as he yanked down her underwear. With her T-shirt shoved up, her fiancé crawled on top of her, breathing smoky-liquor stank into her face.
“I really don’t—”
His hand covered her mouth, and his other hand jammed between her legs. She couldn’t hide her tears as she sobbed. Matt never even slowed a beat.
CHAPTER SIX
The sun poured into Lexi’s bedroom, failing to shine away the darkness that hung over her. But it was a new day, and she would be gone by the end of it. But she needed to clear her head and couldn’t stand to be around Matt while he got ready to go to the gun range.
He sat at the breakfast table, striking matches and blowing them out.
“Any more coffee?” he asked.
“Nope.”
He struck a match and dropped it where Bacon lay on the floor, and he cackled. “Dumb dog doesn’t know to move.”
“Don’t do that!”
“Put another pot on. Maybe I won’t have to.” He lit a match and dropped it. It fizzled out before it hit Bacon’s fur. “Think she’d eat a lit match? Eats everything else.”
Lexi’s pulse pounded in her neck. “Don’t hurt her.”
He closed the matches and tossed them on the table. “I’d never hurt that dog.” But his tone said he’d hurt Bacon just to stick it to her.
For the next two hours, she kept an eye on her dog and fiancé. Her anxiety built, and she needed to blow off steam. Bacon was asleep, hidden in a pile of clothes in the closet, and could only be found if one was listening for fat doggy snores. Matt was zoned out on the couch before he went out around lunch. She had just enough time to get outside, stretch her legs, and think through her day’s plans. For as much Matt lorded over her, he never cared when she ran—her assumption being that he thought she was staying fit and attractive for him. It was one of the few times his narcissism worked in her favor.
“I’m going to go for a run,” she said.
He eyed her as if he didn’t trust her, which was smart because she was done. But her runs were nothing new. “Go burn off your breakfast, peaches. I think I’ll keep Bacon by my side until you return.”
They stared at each other until she nodded. He wouldn’t hurt Bacon for no reason. She’d done nothing to encourage him to hurt the puppy, and she wouldn’t be gone long. The chances that Bacon woke up and came downstairs or that Matt stopped watching sports long enough to do something to her dog were next to nil.
Lexi tied her running shoes and took off. As the
slap, slap, slap
of her soles picked up its pace, her mind numbed. Her limbs stretched, and she ate ground, pushing herself in the cool winter’s morning. For a brief moment, she forgot about planning, about forced sex and threats against her dog. But it all came back when she eased out of a hard sprint and into a jog.
What if Matt did do something to Bacon while she was out—just because he was mean? Doubting her decision to leave, Lexi turned back toward hell to check on Bacon. She rounded the sidewalk, running, pushing herself until she couldn’t remember last night. Or the last year. Or any of her decisions that had gotten her to this point. She used to be strong, confident… but now? The sound of her running shoes pounding was her only companion, the only one that knew how deep she was in.
The always-present stomachache tightened as she neared their street. As soon as she hit the driveway, her quiet self would take over. She was a thousand times more distant, more lost, and just… smaller today than she was last night.
She rounded the last bend in the road and saw Matt’s truck—and
Parker’s
Range Rover. Relief bloomed in her lungs, followed by something that made her a little dizzy. She’d hoped to see him tomorrow, but this was almost too much. It was as if her savior had shown up, even though he had no idea she’d cast him in the role. How and why she’d mentally latched onto him made no sense. Looks and smarts were something to appreciate, but hoping that he would somehow help her… that didn’t matter because Parker was there.
It had to be a sign. Or something. She needed to leave. Or keep running. Never stop and turn back. Except she was drawn to Parker—and couldn’t leave Bacon with Matt. God. Parker had never shown an inkling of a flirtation toward her. Lord knew she didn’t dare look at another man for too long, and certainly not Parker, who was all mysterious cool guy. Big and handsome, almost like out of a movie.
How were those two even friends? Even if it was a friendship that stemmed from back in the day. Then again, no one knew who Matt had become. No one would believe her. Matt had said that once, but he was right. He was brassy and ballsy, a guy’s guy, not an abuser. No way would he hit his woman.
No way
…
Except he did.
She bounced on the toes of her running shoes. Why couldn’t she run away? Right now. Leave everything behind. Shadow would get her money and help her get a new life. She didn’t need to pack a bag, but all of her notebooks—a diary of every time she should’ve left written in detail—her journals with her work, what she didn’t keep online was still inside, and obviously, she wouldn’t leave her dog. Matt would kill the poor girl. He said so all the time.