Bitter Almonds (30 page)

His face reddened. He mumbled in agreement and returned to his seat.

Huda tucked the pendant in its box. ‘A fine piece of jewelry. You have exquisite taste.'

Nadia rose, stiff and awkward. ‘I need to wash my hands.' She walked away from the table before Marwan could say anything. She should thank Huda for stepping in the way she had. Whether the excuse Huda used to stop Marwan was genuine or not, she didn't care. Her sister had saved her from making a scene in this crowded place. About to trip in her haste, she almost ran to hide in one of the restroom stalls. That unknown presence dimming her world earlier became a bright beacon before her eyes. She cherished Omar's silver wings way more than she did Marwan's diamond-studded golden heart.

31

One year later, 1970

Omar threw himself face down on his bed, exhaustion taking command of his limbs. Noises from downstairs traveled through the thin walls, too loud to let him slip into sleep.

Kicking off his boots, he flipped to his side and checked the calendar hanging on the wall by his bed. Four more days until his scheduled leave. Four more days until he saw Nadia again. Four more days, three hours on a crowded bus, and a long restless night, before he could spend two hours in her company.

When he took his breaks, he caught the last bus to Damascus on Thursday to arrive at Fatimah's house late at night and crash on the spare bed in the baby's room. The few hours he got to see Nadia the next day, before he took the bone-jarring bus trip back, had been pure torture so far. Surrounded by all the family members over a big Friday meal in Mama Subhia's house, he barely squeezed in a word or two to Nadia. And Marwan hovered, his manners gentle and caring, but his eyes fierce, full of possessive pride. Seeing him by Nadia's side did things to his mind, distorting the friendship he used to treasure and causing him to spend precious time gritting his teeth, rejecting Marwan's presence.

His eyelids closed, blocking out his meager surroundings. Fatimah was wrong. The engagement had lasted two years now, and counting. Keeping in mind her analysis of the couple's relationship, he went out of his way to stay at a distance, careful not to utter a word or make a
move that would cause friction between Nadia and Marwan. Each time he had seen Nadia, brief and lacking privacy as the encounters were, she grew more and more solemn.

A child screeched from below, and his eyes flew open. What if Fatimah's evaluations were correct? And Nadia, afraid to take action on account of
his
feelings, needed him to intervene on her behalf? Marwan was his best friend, after all.

He sat up. She had been aloof and distant when he visited. Did she hope he would pick up on her dispirited demeanor, giving him a signal? Was he that thick? Nadia was used to speaking her mind to him, and he didn't give her a chance. Self-absorbed and wallowing in self-pity, he didn't see her drowning.

Jumping off the bed, he paced from wall to wall. He must find a way to have a private talk with her on his next visit, see if she was all right. Damn it! He did what he did for her to be happy, not to be all right.

A loud commotion and shouting broke through the walls. Without thinking, he grabbed his pistol and ran downstairs. Whoever scared Um George's family would have to answer to him. Barging in through the front door, he advanced in full combat mode. ‘Is it a thief? Is he still in the house?'

George blocked his path. ‘Nothing like that. But, by Our Lord Jesus, it's worse.'

Omar blinked. He hid his pistol behind his back, taking in the scene. Everyone in the room was crying, Um George wailing in a corner. ‘What happened?'

‘Jamal Abdul Nasser is dead.'

Dragging his feet up the stairs late Thursday night, Omar tried not to land the heels of his heavy military boots on the steps for fear of waking his landlady. Before he reached his room, the door downstairs opened.

‘Lieutenant?'

He leaned over the railing. ‘Sorry to wake you, Um George. I'll try to be more careful next time.'

Um George waved her hands. ‘Come down, please. I need to talk to you.'

Omar clenched his jaw. He was dead tired and should have been on the bus by now, heading home. The commanding general of his division had made a surprise inspection this morning, forcing him to cancel his scheduled leave. Something was brewing in the higher ranks, the entire camp put in ready mode. Depression and frustration dominated everywhere he went. News of Nasser's death had hit everyone hard, including those who didn't approve of his policies. Omar felt orphaned again.

Resigning himself to the uselessness of explaining that to the old lady, he headed downstairs. ‘What can I do for you?'

Um George grabbed his arms and pulled him closer. ‘Lieutenant, you have lived here long enough to know what kind of family we are.' She pulled back and stomped one foot to the ground. ‘I will not tolerate any wrong doing.'

‘What's bothering you, Um George?'

‘Your visitor at this late hour.'

‘What visitor?' He pointed above his head. ‘Did someone stop by?'

‘I will not allow it. By Virgin Maryam, this is a decent house.'

‘What are you talking about?'

Um George stepped into her house, and waved him in. ‘Come in, and explain yourself.'

He went into the foyer and stopped dead in his tracks.

Nadia stood in the middle of the living room, wringing her hands and looking terrified. She threw herself in his arms. ‘Oh, Omar!
Alhamdullilah
. I was afraid I had the wrong house.'

Frozen with fear, he crushed her to his chest. ‘Fatimah all right?'

‘She's fine.' Nadia's voice came out muffled and shaky.

‘Mama Subhia? The girls?'

‘Everyone is fine.'

Um George cleared her throat.

He held Nadia by the shoulders and eased her away. ‘What's wrong? How did you get here?'

‘I took the bus.' She glanced at Um George. ‘I need to talk to you.'

He let her go. ‘Does Mama Subhia know you're here?'

Nadia shook her head.

‘Huda? Marwan?'

She kept shaking her head, adding tears to her silent answers.

‘Nadia, how could you do this? They must be going out of their minds with worry.'

‘I . . . I can't explain it. I just needed to see you.'

Um George crossed her arms over her chest. ‘I demand an explanation now, Lieutenant. You told me you had no blood relatives other than one older sister, and you are not married or engaged. So what's your relationship to this girl?'

Nadia rounded on the old woman. ‘I told you, we grew up together.'

Omar pushed Nadia behind him and faced his landlady. ‘In the two years I have lived here, did I ever cause problems?'

‘I have to say no. You have proved your good upbringing. That's why I'm upset, Lieutenant. I didn't expect this from you. I hate to be wrong.'

‘You're not wrong about me. Nadia's mother raised me from infancy. I consider Mama Subhia my mother, too.' He had to phrase it that way, unable to bring himself to say the word
sister
. He noticed Nadia didn't say it, either. ‘If you will allow me to use your phone to call home and let them know Nadia is safe, you will hear it for yourself from Mama Subhia.'

Um George held her defiant stance for a heartbeat, then her face crumbled and she threw her hands in the air. ‘Oh, who am I fooling?
I know you're not that kind of man, Lieutenant. I raised six men, myself. And I like to think I'm a good judge of character.' She took hold of Nadia's hands and dragged her to a chair. ‘You should rest, dear. You look like you're about to faint. I'll make you something good to eat.' Before she went into the kitchen, she waved her hand to Omar. ‘You make your calls, Lieutenant. Don't worry about me.'

Omar called home, and for the first time in his life, he was relieved to hear Huda's voice. He let her rant for a minute, then suggested she inform Mama Subhia in her own way to ease the sting. His next call went to Marwan.

‘I don't understand. Why didn't Nadia tell me?' Marwan's voice sounded calm, and Omar appreciated the effort it must have taken him to keep it that way.

‘Haven't had the chance to find out what's going on yet. I wanted to let you know she's here. And she's fine.'

‘Had she told me she wanted to see you, I would have driven her over. Instead, she got on the bus at night by herself? Why?'

Omar leveled his gaze on Nadia. ‘You two have a fight?'

‘This is foolish. Let me talk to her.'

Omar placed his hand on the handset to muffle the sound and pointed it toward Nadia. She shook her head.

He returned the handset to his ear. ‘Maybe you should wait, Marwan. It's late, and I have to figure out a few things. I'll call you tomorrow.'

‘If I leave now, I'll be there before dawn.'

‘Don't. Sorry, man, but let me handle things from here.' He heard Marwan breathe into the phone a couple of times, striving for composure no doubt.

‘This is wrong, Omar. It will cause trouble, you know that.'

‘Keep it to yourself, please. Huda will control her end. I'll get back with you tomorrow.'

Ending the call, he pinched the bridge of his nose and cursed under his breath. Marwan showed tremendous restraint, going against his
deeply traditional nature. He deserved better than this kind of treatment. Nadia must have pushed him to the limit by her careless actions. Why had she done it?

Nadia approached him. ‘This was a mistake. I should go back.'

‘How? There are no buses running this late. I can't send you in a taxi by yourself in the middle of the night, and I can't go with you. I have to report to duty in the morning. I can see you're not ready for Marwan to come here, either.' He rubbed his tired eyes. ‘Just what do you expect me to do?'

Um George set a food tray with cheese and cucumbers on the dining table. ‘Come now. Eat something.'

Nadia didn't move. She looked like she was about to crumble on the floor any minute. He held her elbow and guided her to a chair at the table. ‘I'll spend the night in the barracks. You can take my room. Will that be a problem, Um George?'

‘She could stay here with me. You should know I'm on call for George's wife, though.' Um George shoved a bite of pita bread and cheese in Nadia's face, forcing her to open her mouth and take it. ‘She's about to have her baby. If George calls, I have to hurry over.'

‘I'll try to get an emergency leave for the day, but I'm not sure when and if they will give it to me. It wouldn't be right to have Nadia stay in your place while you're away.'

‘I don't need a babysitter,' Nadia whispered.

‘Um George has visitors all the time. I don't want anyone stopping by to start asking questions and jump to unnecessary conclusions.'

‘You're right. It's best she takes your room. No one will bother her there.' Um George forced more food on Nadia. ‘Don't worry, dear. Everything's going to be fine. Whatever problem brought you here, I'm sure it will be resolved in the morning.' She lifted her eyes to Omar, still standing by Nadia's side. ‘Right, Lieutenant?'

‘Yeah.' He attempted a smile. The woman never called him by his name.

Nadia turned her head away from Um George's extended hand. ‘No more, please.'

Um George walked him and Nadia to the door. ‘Take her upstairs and get her settled for the night. Come see me before you leave. I will keep the door open.'

Omar held Nadia's arm and guided her up the stairs. The moonless night shrouded them in darkness, further depressing the mood. The despondent girl by his side was not his Nadia, his cheerful, bouncy-ponytailed Nadia. God forgive him if he found out Marwan was behind this transformation. Best friend or not, he would pound his face to the ground.

The short sleeves of her dress exposed softness, and he endured an urge to caress warm skin under his fingertips. Her dress hem brushed his uniform at the knees with each step they took, making swooshing sounds loud enough to compare them to his racing heartbeat. Like waves, her flowery scent washed over him with the light breeze, and he held his breath until they reached the top. He let her go and opened the door.

Nadia made a sound somewhere between a sigh and a shallow cough.

‘Are you sick? Should I get a doctor?'

‘I just need sleep.'

Keeping the door open behind them, he walked her in and turned on the lights. Some of his clothes lay scattered on his bed. He collected them and threw them into the laundry bag, picking up a pair of socks off the floor.

‘I don't have spare bed sheets. I have used these a couple of days. Um George can lend me a set—'

‘It's fine, Omar. Don't bother.'

He dug a fresh towel from the closet and draped it over a chair. ‘New soap bars under the sink in the bathroom. Extra toothbrushes in the medicine cabinet for when I come over. Help yourself. Need anything else?'

Nadia's fingers crept to her neckline. ‘Something to sleep in? I didn't bring anything with me.'

Tucked under the collar of her dress, her angel wings now showed, drawing his attention like a magnet. She rested the silver pendant on top of her chest over the smooth fabric. Wings rose and dipped with her quickening breaths. His insides clenched as though someone had punched him in the gut. He willed his eyes to the floor, ashamed he took in a good measure of her fullness. He turned to the closet, pulled out a clean shirt and laid it on the bed. ‘You can use this. Should I ask Um George for a nightgown instead?'

‘The shirt is enough.'

He headed outside. ‘Lock the door behind me. I'll be back as soon as I can tomorrow. Keys on the table here.'

 

32

Nadia leaned her back against the door and let tension drain from her body, taking in details of her surroundings. The room seemed small for a man like Omar. His bed under a window occupied the facing wall, a closet and small bookcase the left wall, and a kitchen sink, a small refrigerator and the bathroom door took the right wall. A small table covered with newspapers and one wooden chair crowded the middle of the room.