Beyond These Walls (The Walls Duet #2) (2 page)

“Yeah,” I confirmed.

“You know, if it weren’t for the upcoming wedding and the untold stress I know it’s having on your system, I’d be a little concerned about the fact that my extremely romantic proposal has somehow turned into a recurring nightmare in which you get swallowed whole by an evil forest.”

“Believe me, it’s not by choice,” I said, a shudder running down my spine at the mere thought of those shadowy tree limbs.

“We could still elope.” His eyebrow perked in challenge.

“Our families would kill us.”

“Only if they could find us,” he answered quickly.

“You’ve already spent a fortune on it,” I argued.

“We’ve spent a fortune. Say it with me, Lailah
. We’ve spent a fortune.
You are my fiancée—my soon-to-be wife,” he reiterated. “Everything I have is yours—ours, remember?” He pulled me closer to his chiseled side.

I nuzzled in closer and sighed.

“Okay, fair enough. Since it’s our money, I must protest against such a blatant waste of our funds. So, no elopement, buddy,” I said, pinching his side for effect.

“Ouch!” He laughed. “As long as it all ends with someone saying, ‘I now pronounce you husband and wife’ I’m fine with whatever you decide.”

“You’d really forgo everything and marry me tomorrow?”

Rolling over, he pinned me beneath him, encapsulating me between his strong muscular arms. My fingers instinctively traveled up over the intricate black ink of his arm.

“In a heartbeat. But you’re right. Our mothers would kill us if we didn’t let them witness this day. So, we will be good, and I’ll give you the wedding you’ve always dreamed of. And then, my bride to be, you and I will spend the next three weeks in . . . oh, right. I can’t tell you. It’s a surprise.”

I shook my head, letting out a puff of air in frustration. “Jerk.”

“Such language.” He laughed.

“Why does it have to be a surprise, Jude?” I whined, wrapping my arms around him. “Ireland was enough of a surprise for an entire lifetime. You don’t have to keep trying to dazzle me,” I said.

His head lowered, and I felt the wisp of his lips touch my cheek.

“Actually I do,” he whispered. “Every day for the rest of our lives, I’m going to do just that. You deserve to be dazzled, Lailah.”

Momentarily stunned by his words, I just stared up at him, lost in his warmth and love.

“Could you at least tell me what to pack?” I asked, a shy grin creeping across my face.

“Mmm . . . no,” he responded. Immediately, he chuckled as he watched the look of frustration cross my features. “I could, however, provide you with a guide.”

“A guide?” I asked, my face going blank in confusion. “Is this one of those rich-people things? Are you going to stick me with a snooty personal shopper, Jude? Because I’d rather end up with a bag my mother packed—or just a bag honestly.”

“Really? You don’t want a personal shopper? Because the one I had in mind is perfect for you,” he said with a mischievous grin. He quickly kissed my cheek and hopped off the bed to begin his morning routine.

“No,” I answered, sitting up fully and firmly crossing my arms across my chest.

Since moving to New York, I’d been forced to grow accustomed to many things—city life, the lack of trees, people constantly wearing black for some unknown reason. But the biggest adjustment was Jude’s money.

He’d come to me as Jude, the quiet nursing assistant. What had started out as a simple friendship within the walls of a quiet hospital had blossomed into a love so unlike anything I could have ever imagined. I’d soon discovered the broken man who worked the lonely halls of Memorial Regional in Santa Monica was actually the heir to a multibillion-dollar corporation. Hiding from a past filled with pain, Jude had run from the duties and obligations of his family and hated himself for it.

It’d turned out that I wasn’t the only one with scars.

Jude had saved me, in more ways than one, and in turn, I guessed I had done the same. But living with a billionaire was never a life I’d envisioned for myself. Sometimes, when things had gotten rough and sickness had taken over or I had been told that another procedure was needed for my heart, I had often wondered whether a life, any life, would be possible at all.

All I wanted was Jude. Whether he was a janitor, a nursing assistant, or one of the richest men in the country, he would always be the man who had snuck into my room with a chocolate pudding cup in his hand.

“What if,” Jude said, his smirk growing wider, “I said that this particular personal shopper was flying in especially for you?”

“That, in fact, makes it worse,” I said, making a sour face.

“All the way from Santa Monica?”

My eyes widened. “Grace?”

He answered with an enthusiastic nod.

I jumped out of bed and threw myself into his arms. “Are you serious? When? Where? How?”

We fell back into bed, laughing. “Yes, I’m serious. She’s flying in today. In fact, her flight landed a while ago. So, you’d better get your ass in the shower because she’ll be arriving at our door in a few minutes. Oh, and she’s bringing the baby. You’re welcome.”

I squealed, hugging him and scattering kisses across his adorable face. “You are amazing!” I exclaimed.

Grabbing my face between his hands, our eyes locked, and I felt him sober slightly. The buzz of our happiness zinging between us reduced to a hum as he pulled me toward him.

“No, it is you who amazes me—constantly, daily, every minute. I love you, Lailah, and I can’t wait to make you my wife.”

As his lips touched mine, I was the one who was truly dazzled.

“So, you’re sticking with green for my dress?” Grace asked as we wandered down the streets of Manhattan.

“Yes.” I laughed. “You asked me that last week, you know.”

“I know.” She sighed, bundling up baby Zander and bringing him a little closer to her chest.

Grace had stumbled into motherhood with little mishap. It had shaken her perfectly planned world slightly—having a creature who cried and slept whenever and wherever he chose—but she and her husband, Brian, had adapted well, and Zander was flourishing. I’d always seen Grace with a girl. She was so feminine and dainty, earning the nickname Snow White at the hospital where she worked as a nurse, but seeing her now, with her charming little boy, made perfect sense. He was the calming blue yin to her bedazzled pink yang.

“But I thought that, maybe after my constant whining, you might have changed your mind,” she added, making a goofy face in Zander’s direction.

He laughed in glee at his mother’s silliness.

“You mean, your constant badgering to change the color to pink?” I asked, looking across the street to a rare cluster of trees.

They had begun to change color, fading from green to a fiery orange, which contrasted starkly against the dark grays of the buildings in the background.

“It wasn’t pink exactly. More of a pale blush color. Think of it as a winter pink.” She smiled.

“Winter pink? Now, you’re stretching it, Grace.” I laughed. “You know why I love green.”

“Yes, it matches Jude’s eyes, which is romantic and beautiful and goes great with the wedding’s Christmas theme, but you can’t blame a girl for trying.”

“I’ll give you extra points for persistence,” I added, pointing toward the store we had talked about at lunch.

“Yes! That’s the one! We should find lots of honeymoon stuff there, huh?” she exclaimed. She was doing that strange thing parents sometimes did where they were simultaneously speaking to an adult and their child at the same time. The conversation was geared toward the adult, but the octave of the voice and the overly expressive facial features suggested otherwise.

It was both weird and adorable at the same time.

The three of us entered the large store and began browsing. It was exactly the type of store I was comfortable in. No one came rushing over to judge how much money I was about to spend. I was left alone to roam through the racks with Grace as we carried on a casual conversation, catching up on our lives.

“So, how is life in the cardiac unit?” I asked.

She held up a long-sleeved sweater with fur trim. I shook my head and laughed as Zander reached out from his BabyBjörn for the fuzzy brown collar.

“Well, we haven’t had a prom in a while,” she said with a toothy grin. “But it’s good,” she answered. “A little lonely without my favorite patient, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

“At least you still have Marcus,” I said.

“Yes, I do. Having your mother and him around is like having an extra set of grandparents. They are really wonderful, Lailah.”

“Well, I didn’t expect otherwise.”

The next item she held up for my inspection was a ruby-red bikini. My eyes bugged as they fell on the two barely there scraps of fabric.

“First, a sweater built for arctic weather, and now, a bikini? Where exactly is he taking me?”

Her grin widened. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

My face fell slightly as I contemplated my answer. “He didn’t overdo it, did he? I mean, he knows he doesn’t have to always offer up these crazy romantic gestures. I’ll love him no matter what.”

She hung the bikini back on the rack and took a few steps closer. Wrapping her arm around my shoulder, she ushered me toward some chairs in the corner of the store. Luckily, no abandoned husbands or boyfriends were left in the store today, so the spot was all ours.

“What do you mean?” she asked as we took our seats.

“I just worry sometimes, after everything that has happened—the heart surgery and his guilt over not being there—that he feels this overwhelming need to make up for it. I don’t ever want to be a burden to him, Grace.” Feeling like I was confessing a horrible sin, my hands nervously wrung together.

Jude was the most amazing person I’d ever met. Admitting that I thought he could somehow be acting out of guilt rather than a place of love felt like the worst kind of crime imaginable.

“Lailah, I know the two of you have been through more in two years than most couples experience in a lifetime, but please believe me when I say, these grand gestures that you consider so monumental are nothing compared to the love that man has for you. When he called me last week and asked if we wouldn’t mind flying out for the weekend, there was nothing but excitement in his voice. I remember the old Jude. He was so filled with remorse that there was no room for anything else. This isn’t him. Let him love you the way you deserve to be loved.”

I let her words settle between us, feeling them sink in and solidify. It was exactly what I’d needed to hear. The confirmation pushed away any lingering doubts.

I’d spent the first twenty-two years of my life believing my life would be spent within the walls of a hospital room, only to find an entire world just waiting outside its doors. Jude had made that possible. He’d made
me
possible, and I’d never felt more confident in myself.

But that little girl, the one who never got to experience the thrills of learning to ride a bike or jumping into a pile of leaves, often wondered if those around me noticed the subtle differences between me and the rest of the world. Did they pity me? Did they feel the need to make right the wrongs my damaged heart had taken from me? It was something I’d wondered and struggled with since the scars across my chest had closed up and healed, and life had moved on around them. As time had gone by, these feelings would ebb and flow like crashing waves on the ocean.

And I’d always come back to this one simple conclusion. My family, Grace, Jude—they all loved me for me, and that was all that mattered.

“You’re right. I’m being silly—once again.”

“It’s not silly, Lailah. You wouldn’t be you if you didn’t worry about others. It’s just who you are and one of the many reasons I am proud to call you my friend.”

I couldn’t help but smirk. “Well, now, you’re just buttering me up.” I laughed.

“I am. Can we continue shopping? Or at least pretend to? Zander is about to go AWOL with the lack of movement.”

“Of course, but on one condition.”

“Anything.”

“Can I hold him for a bit?”

She smiled. “I thought you’d never ask.”

“WHERE THE HELL is he?” I roared, slamming my hand hard against my desk.