Authors: Lindsay McKenna
“Yes, but that means come spring, when the ground gets solid again, they'll be back.”
That sent a shiver of dread through her. “I know.”
“This site is a lot more dangerous for everyone than I first realized,” Pete said, looking around, his voice revealing his worry.
Although she wanted to reach out and reassure him, Cali kept her arm at her side. “I knew it wouldn't be safe. I didn't know how bad it was going to be.”
“I worry for you.” Pete gulped. Good God! Where had that admission come from? The words had flown out of his mouth without censure. He saw Cali's eyes widen with surprise, and a different emotion he couldn't name. Then her gaze grew shuttered and he could no longer read her.
“That's funny,” Cali said softly, “I worry about
you
.” For a moment she felt so close to him. His expression exuded warmthâfor her. But just as quickly, Pete allowed that professional mask to fall back in place over his face. He was so handsome, strong and kind. Heart beating in her chest, she hungrily soaked up his unexpected admission. He cared about
her.
Even though Cali was frightened by that realization, she didn't have the same panicked reaction she got when Parker was pursuing her. “I meanâ” she faltered slightly “âbecause you're the boss here, I'm sure the Taliban know who you are. I think you would be a target because of your status on the site.”
Seeing the worry in her eyes, Pete managed a wry smile. “Listen, they aren't going to take on a U.S. Marine.” He added soberly, “I've had the same thought about you. I'm sure they don't like the idea that a woman is the number two boss here on the project. That has to chafe, given their fanatical ideas about Islam and women. I was afraid they'd target you because of that.”
The wind swept between them. The sun was inching westward, and Cali saw deepening shadows on the white slopes of the mountains behind where Pete stood, so strong and proud. “Don't worry about me. I've been in and out of a lot of scrapes, Pete.” The worst one, she wanted to say, was with an engineer named Russ Turner. But she didn't. He'd dishonored her, shamed her, and there wasn't a man on the project who'd respected her after Russ had got done telling his lies about her. Grimly, she said, “I'll survive anything the Taliban wants to throw at me.”
“Well⦔ Pete hesitated “â¦okay with you if I still worry?”
Managing a one-cornered smile, Cali knew it was time to get going. As much as she wanted to stand and talk to Pete, she couldn't. “That's a nice thoughtâsomeone worrying about my skin. Usually, it's the other way around.”
Her skin
. Pete longed to reach out and brush his fingertips against her smooth, flushed cheek. Would Cali feel like velvet, as he imagined in his torrid dreams? “As boss of this site, it's my job to worry,” he told her teasingly. “I'll see you later.”
Cali turned and headed on to her muddy white truck. Buoyant because of the private thoughts she and Pete had exchanged, she felt as if she were walking on air, not across heavy, sticky mud. Funny how a few huskily spoken words from Pete made her feel so buoyant, while a remark from Parker brought her down like a rock.
Parker was adroit enough, smooth enough to start rumors that others would believe. That was how Russ had gotten even with her: gossip. Malicious lies that the men on the site believed. Having so many fine lines to tread with Parker was sapping Cali's energy and enthusiasm for the job.
She climbed into her truck and started it up. As she drove toward the other end of the site, she instead honed in on the warm look Pete had given her. What was she going to do?
Right now, Cali felt like she was standing at the fulcrum of a balance scale. On one side was Parker, who was immature and cocky. On the other was strong, quiet and responsible Pete Trayhern. Both wanted her. Well, she knew Parker did. But did Pete? Cali wasn't sure. She should have felt relief if he only had platonic thoughts about her, but she didn't. Yet if Pete was attracted to her, how in the hell could she handle his attention? Panic struck Cali, and she tightened her hands on the wheel.
I
T WAS CLOSING IN ON
midnight and Pete didn't know what to do. He sat at the desk in his living area, mulling things over. Outside, a December wind howled and the ping of icy sleet pattered like a hailstorm on the trailer. Not even the ugly weather distracted him from his core issue: Cali Roland. Whether he liked it or not, Brad Parker was forcing him to look at her in a new light. That realization had shaken him as nothing had in a long time.
Running his hand through his short hair, Pete turned to his computer. With satellite connection, he was in touch with the world even out in this remote spot. Every night, he put notes about the job into a daily journal on his Dell business computer. Then he traded it for his other one, an Apple G5, which was his personal computer. Any job notes were considered legal documents in a court of law, so Pete kept personal things off the business computer. Tonight, much of what he was feeling spilled out onto the twenty-inch G5 computer screen. Sent via military satellites, his e-mails were encrypted and protected, just as he wanted. That way no one could hack into them and know the contents. Privacy was becoming rare in cyberspace and every option guaranteed his messages would be read by only those at the other end. The e-mail message he struggled with was to his parents. He was telling them about Cali, how his past haunted him like a good friend and how fearful he was about having another relationship.
Easing upright in his chair, Pete finally sent the message to his mother. It was time he got some outside help on his dilemma.
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“M
ORGAN
,
DID YOU READ
Pete's e-mail from last night?” Laura asked as she put a bowl of steaming oats with blueberries in front of her husband.
Morgan glanced up from his seat in their cozy breakfast nook. A storm overnight had coated the oak trees with powdery snow that sparkled like diamonds. Wintry sunlight lanced through the floor-to-ceiling windows to the round yellow table where he sat. “No,” he said, sprinkling brown sugar into his bowl.
“It's different,” Laura stressed, settling across from him with her own bowl of cereal. “I think he's interested in someone, Morgan.”
Raising his brows, he muttered, “Again?”
“Oh, darling, don't take that tone.”
He spooned oats into his mouth and gave her a skeptical look. After wiping his lips, he spread his pink linen napkin back across his lap. “Listen, I've never seen any of our children have as many disasters in relationships as Pete has.”
Sending her husband a beseeching look, Laura buttered her toast. “He's had a few disappointing relationships, that's true. He's trying to understand and learn what love is about.”
Snorting, Morgan said, “He has train wrecks when it comes to the women in his life.”
“Morgan, don't be so hard on Pete. He's tried. He really has. He just doesn't pick the
right
women, is all. Give him time. He's learning what he does and doesn't like.”
“Laura, that son of ours has absolutely no sense about women. I don't know who he got that from.”
She grinned briefly. “Probably me. I was always the romantic idealist.”
Snorting softly, Morgan said, “That's true.”
She pushed the printed e-mail toward her husband. “Do you have time to read it?”
Morgan heard the hope in her voice and dutifully picked it up. The e-mail wasn't long but it snagged his interest right away. Setting his spoon aside, he devoted his full attention to it. “Well, looks like he met someone.”
“Oh, Morgan, you're using that tone again.”
“I don't know when his bad luck with women is going to end, Laura. I really don't. It hurts us to see him hurt. I wish he'd get some perspective on women in general.”
“Didn't you see? He's asking
us
for advice regarding his dilemma. That's new. At least I think he's trying to not make the same mistakes.” Laura bit into the piece of whole wheat toast she was holding and gave her husband a pointed look.
“I guess you're right. Before, he just jumped off the plank into shark-infested waters.”
“Oh, darling! That's unkind. All children go through awful times in relationships. They will make mistakes, and all we can do is be there to support them and hope they learn from the experience.” Laura finished off her cereal. “Besides, I think Pete is being cautious this time. He's trying to analyze things before jumping in. That's also new.”
“Pete always thinks he's in love.” Morgan took a piece of his sourdough toast, wiped the inside of the bowl clean and then popped the piece into his mouth. He picked up his mug of coffee. “That's his problemâhe thinks too damn much and it all gets rolled up in a ball inside him. He doesn't talk to the woman at all. Communication is such a key in any relationship. And he's very bad at it.”
So maybe her husband wasn't going to look at the bright side of this new development. Laura pushed her bowl aside, enjoying the warmth of the sun on her shoulders. She was glad to have on woolen slacks and a sweater. Winter in the Rocky Mountains came early and hard. “Then take heart, because Pete is communicating with us about this, Morgan.”
Morgan sighed, put the coffee down in front of him and wrapped his large hands around the mug. “Laura, he's in a pickle. He thinks he might be drawn to Cali Roland. But she's the lead contractor on this project. He can't mix business with pleasure. Everyone knows that. If the people he works for get wind of this, he can kiss his job goodbye, because he'd have crossed lines you don't cross.” Morgan frowned in consternation.
“Well,” she said pertly, picking up her napkin, folding it and placing it on the table, “I think we should counsel him, Morgan.”
“To do what?” He grimaced. “Darling, as much as I want to see Pete happy, this isn't a situation that's going to give him that.”
“Do you think he likes Cali Roland?”
“I can't really tell from his e-mail. He's in angst over past relationships and worried about getting burned again. At least he's wary this time, as you said.”
“Yes, he is reacting differently this time around. Age and maturity are coming into the picture.”
“I wonder if Ms. Roland knows about Pete's interest in her. He didn't say if she's single, has a relationship or is divorced. I wonder if he's checked her out yet.”
“You're such a sourpuss about this, Morgan! Don't you want to see Pete happy?”
“Of course I do, but he's in a jam on this one.” As if he hadn't been with the others! But Morgan bit back that comment because he didn't want to annoy Laura.
“What would you advise him to do, Morgan?”
Realizing how stubborn his wife could be when she cared about something, he murmured, “Have patience. If he really is drawn to Cali Roland, he has to wait until he's reassigned to another project before he pursues her. He can't have a blatant affair with the woman who's running his construction project.”
“Okay,” Laura said tentatively. She watched as a blue jay hopped from one branch to another of a snow-clad oak. “Just wait.”
“Yes. You should point out to him that their mutual careers could be at risk if he steps over that invisible line from business to personal.”
Frustrated, Laura chewed on her lower lip. “But if Pete waits, it would be for over a year. When he gets reassigned, he could end up halfway around the world. Cali is there in Afghanistan for three years to ensure completion of that power plant.”
Nodding, Morgan finished off his coffee. He set the mug aside and looked lovingly at his wife. “Pet, there are no easy answers on this one. If they really do love one another, a year is nothing. You know that.” He reached out, gripped Laura's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Look at us. We met at the airport. You were hit by a car and ended up temporarily blind.”
“Yes, and you stepped in and took care of me through that awful time.”
“It was a pleasure.”
“I was so scared,” Laura admitted, returning his squeeze. “I couldn't see, and my whole life was upended. You were the only stability I hadâa stranger who walked into my life and took pity on me.”
Grinning, Morgan reluctantly released her small, fine fingers. “Oh, I didn't feel pity for you. It was lust.”
Laughing, Laura sipped her coffee. “It was not! We were falling in love with one another, whether we knew it or not.”
Pushing back his oak chair, Morgan grinned. “Lust and love. All tied together, pet.”
Archly, she said, “Well, love won out.”
“And I've been lustfully happy ever since.” Morgan picked up their dirty dishes and carried them to the kitchen counter. Laura chuckled and followed. She busied herself at the sink.
Giving her a quick embrace, Morgan murmured next to her ear, “Write to our son and tell him to be patient. Praise him for waiting this time, watching and hanging back. Tell him real love takes time to develop.”
Laura leaned back against her husband and said, “I think he should do more than that. I think he should let Cali know that he has a long-term commitment in mind.”
Morgan bussed her soft cheek. “And how is he going to do that?”
“Well,” she said, smiling up at him, “Christmas is always a good time to let a special person know you like them.”
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“M
ERRY
C
HRISTMAS
, C
ALI
.” Pete hesitantly handed her a small gift. They had just celebrated with all the contractors at the main headquarters trailer. The home office had given each contractor Girl Scout cookies as a gift. Out here in Afghanistan, little things like sweets meant a lot. Pete's idea had gone over big with Kerwin Elliot.
Most of the contractors were still celebrating as Pete and Cali had left, heading over to his trailer. Cali sat on the edge of the chair now, stunned by his gesture. She took the small, gaily wrapped gift. Outside the window, snow twirled and fell in lazy patterns, already ankle deep on the site. “Thanks. I didn't expect this, Pete.” She looked up into his weary gray eyes, almost at a loss for words. Cali had never expected a gift from her boss. Not a personal one.
Pete had invited her to come over and share some mulled wine with cinnamon sticks. They sat at his office desk, across from one another. He looked terribly handsome in a red alpaca sweater he said his mother had knitted for him. Cali's heart lurched as he sent her a nervous glance.
“I don't have anything for you,” she murmured, turning the gift around in her hands.
“I understand,” he answered. Gift-giving between the owner of the plant and the contractors was discouraged. But for holidays like Christmas, employers could give all contractors a common gift as a way of saying thank you. Big, expensive or personal gifts were outlawed, because they might be misconstrued as a bribe.
“I like the cookies you gave us,” Cali said as she set the box on the table. Her fingertips tingled. Should she even accept a personal gift from Pete? The bribery rules screamed
no.
Picking up her tall mug of warm, spicy wine, she tried to sound lighthearted. “You're brilliant, Pete. There wasn't a man in that room whose eyes didn't gleam with hunger for those cookies.” Oh, how Cali wanted to let down her professional demeanor and be herself.
Hands clasped on the table, Pete smiled tentatively. She had set his gift aside. Well, what did he expect? If she accepted it, she could be in hot water. And yet he was the one who had initiated this. If she turned him in, he could be out of a job. So what the hell was he doing?
Truth was, he was lonely for a woman's company. They'd both been nearly a year at the site and Pete hungered for her softness. He was sick and tired of business, and longed for personal downtime. A mindless force was driving him to take this small, experimental step.
And yet Cali could reject him. Pete tried to emotionally prepare himself for such a possibility. His heart started hammering. He was so unsure of how she really felt toward him. “Actually, the Girl Scout cookies were my mom's idea,” he said. “My boss liked it, too, and so we ran with it.”
“I like the fact you have a good relationship with your parents. And you go to them for ideas?”
“I sure do. Don't you go to your parents at times?”
Cali set aside the mug and glanced again at the foil-wrapped gift at her elbow. “Of course. I wonder, though, if father-daughter relationships are more common than son-mother-father relationships. I've found men sometimes have problems communicating.” Cali couldn't stop looking at her gift, try as she might to curb her curiosity. She felt a mix of giddiness and fear. To have a relationship with any man on this project could be a fatal blow to her career, she knew. Cali was using this project to prove to everyone that she wouldn't turn into a moon-eyed woman in love with the wrong man. And she wasn't about to drag her father's good name through the mud twice by having a fling with this handsome Marine. It was the right decision, but Cali paid for it daily.