Beyond the Grave (21 page)

Acid churned in his gut. “I sure as hell wish we knew what we were up against. A horde of vampires is less dangerous than that one viper back there, I'd bet on it. We have no idea what he's doing."

Jess looked unconcerned. “Well, if anyone can figure it out, it's us."

His shoulders loosened fractionally. He liked it when she included him in the equation. It was then he realized he'd taken off down the sidewalk expecting her to keep up in that beautiful silk gown.

"Jess, I'm sorry. I forgot about your dress. You can't walk far with that on.” “You underestimate me sometimes, John Brittain. There are many things I can do that would surprise you."

She reached up and planted her soft lips against his for just a second.

It didn't take much to set him on fire. His hot gaze slid over her x-rated body barely covered by the silk. It took every bit of inner strength not to reach out and run his hand across the most perfectly shaped rear end he'd ever seen. He'd wanted to do that all night. Instead he clamped his teeth together. As badly as he wanted his tongue on her smooth skin right now, he knew she'd regret it later, and maybe she'd resent him. She needed to know he could be trusted. Not just for a quick roll in the hay, but for eternity. At least for his little bit of eternity, and he could wait until she was absolutely sure.

He pulled his gaze away from her. “Sure you're okay to walk?"

She looked surprised. She'd given him the opportunity to take advantage and he still hadn't. As they continued down the sidewalk she was quiet. Too quiet. He glanced in her direction then dragged a hand through his hair. The look she'd aimed at him nearly set him on fire.

Hell and damnation, what was she doing to him? She was damned well making it very difficult for him to stick to his resolve tonight.

Had he been wrong to back off? Wasn't this what she wanted? Was she disappointed he hadn't taken her up on her offer?

He stopped in his tracks and grabbed her hand, pulling her into the alcove of a closed office building. “I sure as hell hope I'm reading you right, Jess. The last thing I want to do is to disappoint you. I get the feeling that little invitation back there is still open?"

She looked up at him. The pink tip of her tongue flicked out to moisten her lips. She nodded, but didn't speak.

He groaned, and pressed her taut body against the wall, grinding himself against her until she tipped her head back exposing the line of her neck, and voluptuous cleavage. The sight of her obvious pleasure nearly finished him. Sandwiching her between his hard body and the wall felt like his teenage fantasies were coming to fruition. He finally had the babe with the amazing body.

Every nuance, every experience with her felt new and exciting. His body ached for her, and he had the feeling she was just as aroused as he was.

He kissed her again. Hard. She parted her lips and welcomed his assault, moving sensuously against him as their kisses deepened, nearly robbing him of the ability to breathe.

He reached down with both hands and cupped her rear, pulling her even tighter against him.

"Dear God, Jess, you're driving me wild. I can barely control myself when you're dressed like this. Do you know what you do to me?"

She nodded, her lush lips curling up at the sides.

Hell, how could he ever understand how to make her happy? A normal woman was difficult enough, but a vampire? A sexy, unbelievably sensual woman like Jess, could turn on the heat and drive him past the point of no return in seconds flat. And that was without using her mind power. He suspected a single thought from her joined with his could turn sex into a mind-altering experience.

Her soft hair brushed against his face when he pulled her into his arms. He inhaled her scent, a hint of rose mixed with something exotic and increasingly addictive to him. All he knew was that he craved that scent as much as he craved her.

"I'm crazy about you. You know I wouldn't have made this move if I didn't think you wanted it too, don't you?"

She didn't answer. Instead she ground herself against him again, and he sucked in a quick breath. Did she know how her firm breasts tantalized him through that red silk? Talk about pleasurable agony. He bit his lip in order to stay in control.

"Britt, I've thought this through. I'll take my chances at whatever happens next between us."

Britt looked into her eyes and buried his hands into the hair at the back of her head. “Only for you,” she whispered, kissing his collar bone before moving to his neck.

Suddenly, he realized he wasn't the least bit afraid that she might bite him. He'd gotten over that fear. In fact, he was so hot and bothered right now, he didn't care if she did bite him. At least he'd die happy.

"Come back to my apartment,” he said thickly just before her lips claimed his with such ferocity he nearly lost it right there.

"I thought you'd never ask me again,” she murmured against him, then slipped her tongue inside and drove his libido into overdrive.

He groaned, and pushed her slowly away. “Not here.” He grasped her hand and pulled her back onto the sidewalk, waving one hand in the air. “Taxi!"

She slapped his arm and laughed. “You idiot, there aren't any taxi's here."

He grinned. “Oh right. We'll then, it looks like I'll have to drive. I warn you though, I'm just a little bit distracted at the moment, but I'll get us there as fast as possible."

"Oh,” she smiled wickedly at him. “Let's not make it fast. Let's make it slow and pleasurable."

The grin wiped off his face and his burning need for her spiked into hyperdrive. “Dear God, woman, you know how to torment me."

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Britt reluctantly let go of Jess's hand as she settled back on his bed and smiled up at him.

She'd never felt more sure of what she wanted. Him. And the way he was looking at her right now made her quite confident he felt the same way. Not to mention, with the aid of her returning vampire abilities, she was erotically aware of every physiological change in his body—his heartbeat, the blood pounding in his veins, and his heated skin exuding pheromones so enticing and aromatic that she breathed in deeply.

He stood next to the bed now, staring down at her with such adoration, she nearly squirmed. “You're very sure about this?” he asked.

"Positive."

She adjusted her hips to a more comfortable position and instantly felt the heat of his gaze riveted to her every movement. As if the motion of her hips was suddenly more than he could bear he ripped off his shirt and lowered himself next to her on the bed. His warm, moist tongue began a sensual exploration in the V of her silk dress along the hollow between her breasts creating an electrical charge that exploded sensations along her nerve endings. Sensations she didn't even know were possible until now.

Aware of her own ragged breathing, she took infinite pleasure in each sensation he elicited, until his hand slipped under her gown and slid up her leg while his hot mouth still explored the edges of her gown with his tongue.

"Britt, I..."

His firm lips covered hers. Splendidly numbing her mind and making her forget whatever it was she wanted to say. Never before had his kisses brought her to the brink of euphoria. Kisses so hot, so dark, so intimate and probing she nearly forgot about what his hand was doing to her. Until that exploration took on a life of its own and she gasped at his expert abilities.

Beyond logical thought now, she explored the taut muscles of his back which were suddenly as moist as she'd become. Sensations rippled through her. Nearly robbed her of her breath, and she became absorbed in the sheer pleasure he was able to incite. Pleasure she'd never known before. Pleasure she was able to give as well, by the sound of his own breath rasping in her ear while he slid down the zipper on the side of her dress and slipped the bodice down to her waist.

He cursed violently when her naïve touch became more intimate, driving him to the edge of sanity.

Suddenly, he pulled away. She moaned a protest, but he hushed her. “We need to get this dress off you. Lift your hips, baby."

She complied, and he pulled the silk free, tossing it aside.

"God, Jess. You're beautiful. So beautiful."

"I'd return the compliment, but you're still dressed,” she complained.

He took the hint, stripping off the last of his clothing. “Better?"

Dear God, he was gorgeous. Broad shoulders, muscled abs, lean hips, powerful thighs, and more, so much more! She smiled. “Much better."

Then he was with her again, on her, pressing her into the mattress with his weight.

Jess felt like she'd died again, only this time she'd been given the gift of light. His light, his love. His proficiency made her body sing, made her scream with a sense of pleasure so profound it rocked her. Made her feel as if she were truly alive. Even at that moment when she lost her virginity to him, there was brief pain, then pleasure like she'd never experienced in her dark life.

That was the best gift, his ability to fill her heart and make it burst with emotion. At least that's what she thought until he fitted himself inside her with such sweet urgency that she found herself responding heart and soul. With his body, his words, and his mouth, he drove her higher and higher until she shattered. When he followed, she clasped his trembling body. As the last tremors of ecstasy faded, tears stung her eyes. She felt whole, or as close to it as she could remember being.

He'd given her a gift of humanity, a gift that no other man would ever be capable of giving. She could no longer deny that she loved him, heart and partial soul. Her breathing hitched and she snuggled tighter against him.

After lying in each other's arms for what felt like a perfect slice in time, Jess smiled and brushed her cheek against the coarse contours of his chest. “I'm sorry I've been putting you through hell, Britt. I'm confused myself. When we nearly made love the last time, I was afraid."

He laughed softly and nipped at her ear. “Nothing scares you, lady,” he said.

"I'm not kidding. I thought our growing intimacy caused me to faint. To lose some of my vampire abilities."

He stopped nuzzling her neck and lifted his head, concern lining his features. “Why would you think that?"

"What if our physical connection really did instigate another element of my humanity? At the same time, it could have taken away some of my vampire abilities. Or at least alter them to the point that my physiology is out of kilter. My problems started right after I had that dream, in your bed, just before we..."

A look of terror crossed his face. “But why didn't this happen the last time you got close to someone?"

She looked away for a moment. “This
was
my first time, Britt."

"Ever!"

She nodded and Britt sucked in a shocked breath. “I had no idea. You gave me no indication...” Fifty years as a vampire and she'd never formed a relationship with anyone else? Not even James? He'd always assumed that she'd bitten James during sex. In fact, Britt had been harboring a spark of jealousy toward James since he'd met him.

"God, Jess, did I hurt you?"

She laughed at him. “Not likely. I may be a woman, but I'm also a vampire. I'm not that fragile anymore."

Suddenly, the implications of what she'd risked by having sex with him began to seep into every crevice of his brain. “Are you saying having sex with me might help you become human again?"

"She nodded. “That's an oversimplified version of what I think might be happening, but yes."

"But that's great!” Even before he'd said the words, he knew there was something wrong. Somehow the implications were a lot more exciting for him and a lot less exciting for Jess. “Would it be such a bad thing to regain your humanity?"

She stilled beneath him, and he felt the barrier go up between them again.

"I'm not sure what I want. I've been this way for nearly a whole lifetime. I've tried to use my curse for the betterment of people. This has become the essence of who I am.” She lowered her head, as if ashamed. “I know it sounds crazy, Britt. You must think I'm a monster to even consider remaining a vampire given a choice to become human again. I'm not sure I even understand it myself."

Vampire or not, her inner beauty was undeniable. She didn't need humanity to recover that.

Then his blood ran cold as reality sank in. What if being intimate really could take away something she didn't want to lose? If loving her could alter her abilities, they might never be able to have this kind of closeness again.

He clenched his fists. “You shouldn't have let me do this to you before telling me what might happen, Jess. I had every right to know how it could affect you. What it would cost you."

A tear came out of the corner of her eye and rolled down her cheek. She appeared shocked at the tear and reached up to touch it with her index finger.

She'd been a vampire for too long. It had become part of who she was. Now he understood why Regent had gone out of his way earlier to point that out to him that Jess might never be able to change.

One thing he knew, he loved Jess. Vampire or human. But would she still love him if he had ripped away the essence of her? The dark side that she'd shaped into a weapon to save humans against her own kind. She'd turned her darkness into something good.

Then his brain latched onto something else that Regent had probably already considered. Something he doubted very much that Jess had thought of. She'd be weak as a human. His muscles clenched involuntarily.

And she'd still be a target!

Now he realized why she
had
to remain a vampire. She wouldn't last a day as a human. She'd be under attack by every vampire in New York City and she'd have no extraordinary means to protect herself.

Jess fought back a sob. Britt must think her emotionally unstable, not to mention that he was livid that she hadn't confided her fears to him about their intimacy. She couldn't blame him.

What if their one amazing encounter had changed her physically? Had initiated something inside her to become human again. After all, she was already half-way there with the help of Regent's prayers, what would it take to tip the scales toward humanity, if it was at all possible?