Beyond the Consequences: Book 5 of the Consequences Series (Volume 5) (26 page)

“Honey,” Emily said as she hugged her sister, “Courtney and I have talked about this. We’re both leaving.”

Claire’s eyes widened. “One of you can stay.”

Emily shook her head. “We love you and we’re right outside.” She looked past Claire to Tony. “This is something the two of you should share. Just please, let us know as soon as you can.”

Tony nodded to Emily and hugged Courtney. “I will,” he said. “I’ll be out as soon as I can.”

As Tony moved to his place by Claire’s shoulder and held tightly to her hand, she watched the mirror near the end of the bed. Each time the nurse told her to push, she did. Each time the doctor said to breathe, she did. Following instructions had never been a problem, especially when the payoff was on the horizon.

How long did labor last? Claire couldn’t recall. Later she’d remember pressure and some commotion. She’d recall reassuring touches from the dark-eyed man at her side and words from her doctor. She’d also remember that Tony was never asked to decide who would survive. There was never a need. Early in the morning on February seventh, Nathaniel Sherman Rawlings officially entered their lives.

Claire didn’t know if Nichol had entered with as loud of a cry, but the one she heard from her son warmed her heart and soul.

“Yes, Claire and Anthony, your son is announcing his presence,” the doctor proclaimed, lifting their son in the air.

As Claire looked up at her husband, she saw the moisture on his cheeks that she felt in her own eyes. He leaned down and whispered, “I love you.”

She couldn’t form words until the nurse laid Nathaniel on her chest and covered them both with a blanket. “Hi, Nathaniel,” she cooed. “I’m your momma.”

Tony stroked the small head covered in dark hair. “Hello, son, I’m your daddy.”

It was then their son’s eyes opened and Claire and Tony were lost in the sea of emerald. Warmth enveloped their bubble as Tony embraced his family. “He has your eyes.”

They stayed like that for a while, not ready to share the moment with those outside the door. It was one of those rare occasions that can be looked back upon as lasting both a second and forever, a life-changing eternity that cemented the past with the future.

To the world you may be just one person, but to the one person you may be the world.

—Mother Theresa

CLOSING HER EYES
Claire listened to the sound of her husband’s voice. The cadence reminded her of a lullaby, yet his words were not that of a song or a fairytale. His words were those of a father talking to his son: words of love and encouragement, as well as promises that only time could substantiate. Just as it had been when Nichol was a baby, the middle of the night feeding was among Claire’s most cherished time of day. Tony would wake to their son’s cries and change Nate’s diaper, bringing a fresh, sweetly scented baby to Claire’s arms. For a two-week-old baby, Nate was a fervent eater. Undoubtedly eating was his favorite activity. Once he started, he’d use all of his energy to devour everything that Claire had to offer. When he was satisfied, his little eyes would blink until the emerald disappeared and long lashes rested peacefully upon his growing cheeks.

It was then that Tony would take him into the nursery, sit with him, and rock him. Claire didn’t always know how long they spent together. Most nights she’d fall back asleep listening to the deep baritone voice waft through the quiet night air. This was Tony and Nate’s special time, and she didn’t want to interrupt. When she and Tony talked about another child, Tony confessed that those hours spent with Nichol in paradise, in the middle of the night, were instrumental in keeping his sanity while at Yankton. He said that he’d lie in his bunk, night after night, and relive those hours in his head. The softness of her tiny hands and the scent of baby powder would tease his senses until he fell asleep. He knew it wasn’t real, but the illusion was better than what his real life offered at the time. He couldn’t stop his mind from going to that small nursery when his eyes closed.

The difference between their bubble on the island and the one they now enjoyed was the addition of the sleeping child beside Claire. Despite the child psychologist’s recommendations, after the birth of her brother, Nichol found her way into Tony and Claire’s bed. It didn’t happen every night, but it did happen. Surprisingly, the peace and security their daughter found snuggled between her parents allowed her to sleep peacefully even through Nate’s waking and feeding.

It was Madeline who attested that Nichol’s behavior was acceptable. After all, Nate’s room was attached to Tony and Claire’s; how could Nichol not feel left out across the hall in her separate bedroom? Madeline also reassured Claire that in time their daughter would once again be content in her own space. For now, Nichol needed to know that she was a part of what her brother shared. When Claire confessed Nichol’s new sleeping arrangement to others, she was shocked and surprised to learn that they too had similar stories. Michael spent much of Beth’s first few months in John and Emily’s bed, as had Caleb, many years ago, when his sister Maryn was born. Even Meredith had similar tales with her two children. Though Claire was confident in their decision to allow Nichol this luxury, hearing that others had done the same helped reassure her.

Snuggling close to Nichol, Claire sighed. She could no longer differentiate Tony’s words, but the rhythm comforted her as she drifted between wake and sleep. It wasn’t until she heard her son’s whimpers that Claire realized morning had arrived. Looking to the other side of the bed she saw only Nichol. By the numbers on the clock and the sound of water from the attached bathroom, Claire knew Tony was awake and getting ready for work.

A cloud of steam welcomed Claire as she opened the bathroom door. Once inside it was the magnificent sight of her husband stepping from the shower that fully woke her senses. As he reached for his towel, their eyes met. Droplets of water sparkled on his warmed skin as they descended from his broad shoulders down to his toned legs. Claire made no secret of her scan as she took in the nude man before her.

“Good morning, Mrs. Rawlings,” he said with a grin as he wrapped the towel around his waist.

Closing the gap between them, her emerald eyes sparkled. “Good morning. Were you up a long time with Nate last night?”

“No, not too long. Is he awake?”

Rubbing her petite hands over his shoulders, Claire replied, “Yes, I just came in here first so I could feed him again.”

Reaching for her hand, Tony kissed her fingers. “Again? I think our son has an insatiable appetite.”

Claire’s breasts ached as she thought not about Nate’s appetite, but the one of the man before her. Closing her eyes, she imagined Tony’s lips not on her fingers, but on other parts of her body. Though the doctors had told them to wait six weeks before resuming relations, Claire knew that she didn’t want to wait. Nate’s birth had been much kinder to her body than Nichol’s. Reaching with her other hand to Tony’s shoulder for support, she felt his muscles tense as she moved her fingers down his arm. Inch by inch, Claire’s own appetite began to grow.

Remembering Tony’s comment about Nate, Claire finally replied, “Hmmm. Yes, he does.”

As Tony continued his gentle kisses of her fingers, she felt the release. Looking down, she saw the evidence on the bodice of her nightgown. “Tony…”

His dark eyes followed hers, and his devilish grin made her smile. “I’m glad to know that Nate isn’t the only man who can do that to you.”

Playfully she pulled her hand away and swatted his bare shoulder. “You’re awful.”

“I am?” he asked with his most innocent tone. “I thought I was pretty good. I mean if I were awful why would you…”

Claire shook her head as she disappeared behind the next door. Minutes later, she was in the nursery with Nate: his little lips latched and lower jaw began moving with vigor. The relief was instantaneous as he suckled and her body relaxed. Once she’d moved Nate to the other side, Tony stepped into the nursery. Though he was now fully dressed, Claire still enjoyed the view. His customary Armani suit and shiny black loafers reminded her that he wasn’t only a daddy who would rock his child in the middle of the night, but also a businessman who spent his days making decisions that affected multitudes of people. Though the silk spoke of importance, the way the jacket stretched over his broad shoulders and tapered to his waist, reminded her of the man she’d watched step from the shower. Though her mind was there, Tony had obviously moved on.

Leaning down, he kissed her cheek and said, “Nichol’s still sound asleep. Do you want me to wake her?”

“No, let her sleep. I’m sure Shannon’s awake, but Nichol’s been fighting naps. The longer she sleeps in the morning, the better it is for all of us this evening.”

Tony laughed. “Then, by all means, let her sleep.” His brows peaked. “I’m on my way to the kitchen for breakfast. Would you like me to have something sent up?”

Claire looked down at Nate, his suckling now slowed. “No. If you’re going to eat here, I can come down in a few minutes.”

Tony glanced down at her nightgown and lifted his brows.

“Yes, I’ll be sure to change or wear a robe. I know I’m comparatively underdressed.”

He teased the strap of her nightgown. “I like the way you’re dressed.”

Claire shook her head. Maybe he hadn’t moved on.

“I’ll be sure they have your tea ready.”

“Ugh,” Claire replied. “I’d give anything for a nice cup of caffeinated coffee.”

Tony smirked. “Sacrifices, my dear.”

“Sure, that’s easy for you to say.”

He reached for Nate’s head. As he stroked the fine hair, the tips of his fingers purposely caressed Claire’s breast. “I believe I’m sacrificing too.”

“Yes, but your sacrifice is a sacrifice for me, too.”

He lowered his lips near her neck, purposely bathing her sensitive skin in his warm breath. “Would I be
awful
,” he emphasized the word, “if I were glad to hear that?”

Inhaling deeply, Claire sighed. “No. No more awful than you already are.”

As she did the mental math, Tony turned to leave. Just before entering back into their suite, he muttered, “Three and a half more weeks.”

A smile came to her lips and her cheeks rose. That was exactly what she’d been thinking.

THE SOUND OF
Madeline’s deep laugh echoed through the foyer as Claire approached the dining room. Turning the corner her heart leapt. Madeline and Francis truly were like family as they sat conversing with Tony over their breakfast. On the island, they used to eat their midday meals together, all four of them. In Iowa, Tony was rarely home for lunch and dinner was an off and on occasion for them all to be together. Though Claire always asked the older couple, Madeline insisted that the evening meal was an important time for the family.

Family was what Claire saw as she stood in the doorway and watched the three casually discussing daily events. Madeline and Francis were as close to parents as Tony or Claire would ever have. Their knowledge and wisdom affected both Tony and Claire in different ways. Claire welcomed Madeline’s advice to the point of seeking it on many occasions. Tony was less forward, yet Francis had found a way to interject his beliefs and wisdom into Tony’s life. Perhaps they were continuing their parent lessons without either Tony or Claire realizing what was happening.

“Oh, Madame Claire, let me hold Nate while you eat,” Madeline said when she turned to see Claire.

As Claire placed Nate in Madeline’s arms, she smiled at the way he nuzzled against the large woman. “I think we’re spoiling him. He could be in his chair.”

Madeline’s dark eyes beamed. “Oh, no. Loving a bébé is not spoiling them. It is making him feel safe so that one day he can be in his chair and know he is still loved.”

Sitting next to Tony, Claire smiled. “Well, he’s definitely loved.”

“And Nichol?” Francis asked.

“She’s loved too,” Claire answered quickly.

“No, Madame el, Nichol? Where is she?”

“Oh,” Claire giggled. “She’s still asleep.” Before they asked, she volunteered, “She slept in our bed again last night.”