Between Us (The Renegade Saints #3) (17 page)

“And
I
told
you
to remember you don’t have to agree to do shit you don’t want to do,” she reminds me firmly.

“Obviously,” I assure her. “You know I would never sleep with anyone if I didn’t want to. If it comes down to it and I’m not feeling it, I’ll walk away. All I’m saying is I don’t get the impression Cole does traditional relationships. With him and Flynn tied up this week, I’ve spent a good amount of time with Gavin and Tyson. Ty told me off camera that Cole has been doing it this way since high school.”

“Hm,” she muses. “I wonder if it’s organic, or if there’s some weird reason for it. Like he can only get it up if he has a sword fight with another guy first.”

“Uh, earth to Lana,” I sputter. “If that were the case, I wouldn’t have been able to give him a blowjob the other night.”

She wrinkles her nose as she considers my words. “True, true… Still, I’ve heard some weird shit in my time. Don’t be surprised if you find out he can only bone if there’s a dick in his ass at the same time.”

“Lana!”

Raising a shoulder, she shrugs me off. “What? You know the world is nuts, girl. You have to be prepared for everything.”

“Great,” I mutter. “Sounds awesome. I’ll look forward to it.”

“Don’t pout, Princess. I’m sure it will all work out.”

“I hope—”

“Unless he’s got some weird fetish about having dudes shit on him—”

“Oh my God, Lana! Seriously, you’re freaking me out now and I’ve got to sit across a table from them later,” I remind her.

Our conversation is interrupted by the sound of an alert from my computer. Grabbing my mouse, I lean forward and look at my monitor.

“Google alert,” I tell her. “About Flynn.”

Clicking the link, I follow it to TMZ. And there, large as life, is a photo of Flynn touching a girls’ stomach. His family is gathered around, and everyone looks ecstatic.

“Renegade Dad,” the headline screams.

Holy. Shit.

“Well,” I say slowly, “I guess this explains what the emergency situation was.”

Leaning in, Lana reads what’s on the screen.

“Whoa, whoa,” she squeals. “I thought you said Flynn was ass over elbows for your co-worker. Tessa, right?”

“I thought he was,” I confirm. “Guess I read that wrong.”

“Yeah,” she says dryly. “This is why I’m a lesbian. Men are assholes.”

I smack her leg playfully as I laugh. “Shut up, jerk. You were born this way. Whether or not men were assholes, you wouldn’t have had a taste for sausage.”

“True statement,” she concedes, “but men are still assholes. I gotta jet, though. You stay here and do whatever it is you do on the computer to make documentary magic. I just came home to grab my gym bag, so I’m out. Catch you on the flip side.”

After she wanders away, I can’t stop thinking about Flynn and his baby mama. These men clearly aren’t into being tied down. My knee-jerk reaction is to text Tessa, but I quickly talk myself out of it. If I were in her position, I wouldn’t want people asking me a million questions. I’ll wait until tomorrow to send her a text and see if she’s okay. If she doesn’t want to talk, I’ll let it go. It’s up to her.

I’m just finishing a round of Call of Duty when the doorbell sounds. I quickly shut down the gaming system and turn the TV off before running to the door and flinging it open. Immediately, I feel let down. I’d assumed Cole was coming to pick me up, but Ian’s the one standing on my doorstep. Plastering a smile on my face, I tell him to give me two seconds to grab my purse.

“No problem,” he says agreeably.

I hurry across the room and take my bag from the kitchen counter before returning to the door.

“All right, let’s go get our grub on. I’m in the mood for a big steak,” I chuckle.

As I turn from closing the door, I find Ian looking me over.

“You look beautiful as always,” he says.

“Thank you,” I answer.

I’m grateful for his compliment, but it doesn’t make me feel all tingly inside. Not the way I’ve felt every time Cole has said something similar. Another difference, is the lack of tension between us once we’re in the elevator. Being confined in the car with him isn’t a sexual thing, either. I relax in the passenger side of his Jeep as we make our way toward the restaurant.

Ian isn’t big on talking and driving, so instead we listen to music. This means I stay chill, only starting to get keyed up when the GPS indicates we’re less than two minutes away. Without a doubt, I know Cole gets my heartbeat pumping—but no matter how attractive I find him—and believe me, I do—Ian is different.

When we enter the restaurant and give Cole’s name, the host leads us toward a corner booth.

“Mr. Hayes is not here yet,” he informs us. “He called from the car about fifteen minutes ago and said to let you know he might be a few minutes late. He got stuck in traffic coming over the canyon.”

Ian and I both place drink orders with the host before settling in to wait for Cole to arrive.

“How were your sessions with Gavin and Ty this week,” he asks.

“Pretty good,” I answer. “Although…”

Leaning in so we can’t be overheard, I continue, “I was under the impression Ty has something big to share. So far, that hasn’t happened, at least not with me. Do you have any idea what it is?”

Ian shakes his head in the negative but has to wait to answer as the waitress drops off our drinks. He got a vodka gimlet while I’m drinking red wine. He shudders as he watches me take a sip from my glass.

“No matter if it’s red, white or some other color, I’m not sure I’ll ever drink wine again.”

“I’ll drink it for you. I don’t believe in letting grapes go to waste,” I chuckle.

“Me and grapes are on the outs now,” he laughs. “And no, I don’t know what it is yet. I know there’s something, though. All the guys are so protective of him and at different times, they’ve each declined to answer questions about him. The standard line is that they’ll be happy to talk—
after
he does.”

“Yep,” I respond. “That was what I got, too. I did some research, but nothing came up. Whatever it is, it’s definitely not something that’s public knowledge.”

“I can’t even make a guess about what it might be,” he answers.

“I don’t think it’s about the overdose. Other than that, I’m in the dark, too.”

“Yeah, I agree—”

Ian stops talking when Cole arrives at the table.

“Sorry I’m late,” he tells us.

He shakes Ian’s hand before turning my way. My pulse elevates as he looks me over. Something passes between us, unspoken but serious. I have so many questions—why did he say yes to bringing Ian into this? Was I not enough? I hate that I feel this way—weak and uncertain. And yet, the idea of not having him is worse. When he drops a soft kiss on my lips, I shiver.

He drops down into the seat between Ian and me with a sigh.

“Traffic coming over the hill was hell tonight,” he says. “Today has been a mess, so it was the last thing I needed. I almost started beating my head against the steering wheel a few times. I hope you weren’t waiting for me long.”

Ian and I both assure him we weren’t.

“Thanks for that,” he replies. “Can I assume you both saw the gossip about Flynn today?”

We nod in unison.

“Big surprise, they got it fucking wrong,” he says as he grimaces. “We found out a few days ago that Todd has twin daughters. The girl in the photo is Flynn’s sister, Delilah. She and her fiancé are having a baby. The Renegade Dad bullshit was just some fucked-up crap the paparazzi pulled out of their asses.”

“Holy shit,” Ian exclaims excitedly, “Todd had other kids?”

“Wait, wait,” I cut in as I hold up my hands and make a time out motion. “Please tell me Tessa knew the story was a lie before it went live.”

Cole rubs at the back of his neck and shakes his head. “Nope, and when Flynn called her, she congratulated him on his baby before hanging up on him—and disconnecting her phone line. The phone she was assigned for the tour is sitting in a box at Flynn’s, so that’s no help.”

“So he hadn’t told her about them,” I question.

“No, his dad has been a mess so he’s been staying at his house. He wanted to tell her all of this in person, once the DNA results came back. Bad fucking move, man. He chose and he chose wrong,” Cole admits.

“What’s he going to do to fix it?” I ask.

We’re interrupted by a waitress asking for Cole’s drink order. After he tells her he just wants a bottle of beer, she scurries off.

“That’s part of why I was late,” he explains. “Once he realized she wasn’t going to talk to him, he packed his shit and booked a flight to Philly. I drove him from Todd’s to the airport, and then had to double back to my house to get ready.”

“It’ll work out,” Ian assures us. “Tessa’s a cool chick. I can’t see her holding a grudge.”

Cole lifts his just delivered beer in Ian’s direction. “Here’s hoping you’re right. I can’t even imagine what it will do to Flynn if she tells him to fuck off permanently.”

“He should’ve kept her in the loop,” I say firmly. “This all could have been avoided if he’d just done that one simple thing.”

“That’s very true,” Cole agrees. “He’s definitely learned his lesson.”

Our conversation keeps up during the course of dinner, although I’m quieter than usual. I purposely leave it to Cole and Ian to fill in the blanks because I’m trying to see if they still have chemistry. They did, but at some point, I stopped noticing it and I’m realizing now I stopped seeing it
before
the night at Cole’s.

Just by taking a step back in order to watch them interact, I’m noticing things. Is Ian attracted to Cole? Yes, absolutely. That’s more noticeable now than ever. But is he really going to act on it? My gut says no, but I could be wrong.

I knew Cole was attracted to Ian originally—but I really don’t see it now. He’s friendly with him, but not in any kind of a way that implies he wants to get in his pants. They’re having a nice time talking, though. They talked about some dry riverbed out near Vegas they both want to go to before moving on to the pros and cons of skydiving. It’s guy talk 101, which was just fine with me since it gave me the perfect opportunity to observe—and stuff my face with the melt in my mouth steak I ordered.

“You’ve been quiet tonight,” Cole says after the waitress takes his credit card to pay for dinner. “What’s up?”

I shrug as I take the final sip of my wine. “Just watching you both through my invisible lens,” I answer.

His brow furrows as he looks at me. “You okay?”

I nod as I wave my hand dismissively. “I’m fine, just… you know.”

I pause, trying to come up with the perfect words. Finally, I just go for it. “There was that whole thing the other day,” I say as I gesture between the two of them. “Ian said what he said, then you texted. Since then, I’ve not heard from either of you. We should talk about it.”

“You’re right,” Cole agrees. “Let’s talk.”

“Uh, actually,” Ian interjects, “Now really isn’t a good time.”

I see Cole’s eyes widen as he looks at Ian in surprise, and I know my expression isn’t all that different.

“One, I don’t want to talk about this kind of thing in public,” Ian announces. “Two, I have an early interview with your grandmother,” Ian says to Cole.

Cole has a confused look on his face, like he’s trying to catch up. He says nothing for a few seconds, and I don’t step in to say anything either. He opened this door for conversation, so he’s going to need to deal with Ian not wanting to follow-up. Honestly, it works for me that Ian doesn’t want to discuss it. I’m not really up for it either.

“Sure,” Cole finally says. “Of course. We’ll do it another time.”

The inflection of his voice gives the impression he doesn’t really believe that. Ian goes from looking uncomfortable to relieved in the space of a heartbeat.

“There’s no rush,” Ian asserts. “We’ll get to it at some point.”

I don’t know what Cole’s take on Ian is, but right now my gut is telling me he really doesn’t want to deal with any of this. At this point, I’m not sure why he said he wanted to try. His actions speak far louder than his words.

“I’ll take Devon home,” Cole announces.

“No,” Ian says firmly. “I brought her, I’ll take her home.”

Cole looks perplexed. “You, uh, need to get up early though,” he reminds Ian. “It’ll be easier for me to take her.”

“I live closer to her,” Ian answers. “Just let me do it.”

Cole looks between Ian and I, checking for my reaction I think, so I shrug. It’s not worth getting into an argument over it.

We leave the restaurant together and Cole stands with us at the valet to wait for Ian’s car to pull up. When it does, he opens the passenger door for me and helps me get in. Once I’m settled, he leans in and gives me a soft kiss on the lips. Closing the door, he taps on the roof with his hand and looks through my window at Ian.

“We’ll talk soon,” he says.

Ian nods as he looks away and puts his hand on the gearshift. “Of course,” he answers.

Ian stays as quiet on the drive back to my apartment as he had been on the way to the restaurant. My mind is going a mile a minute which means even though I’m trying, I can’t really harness any of my thoughts for long enough to make sense of them. The only thing I know for certain is that I want Cole. The rest of this, I am not so certain of.