Between Sisters (18 page)

Now we were all crying.

“
I say go for twenty thousand, and slap him with divorce papers at the time of the payoff. Make sure that punk doesn’t get to leave with shit beyond the clothes on his back,” Kelly suggested.

“
I agree,” I added.

When we composed ourselves, we put the plan into motion, and Robert went for it.

23

Shawnee

This sneaky bastard has over seven million dollars in a secret bank account that I knew nothing about. On top of that, he has a few hundred thousand in four other accounts and more in an offshore account. I should take him for half of it all, but at this point, I just want him gone sooner than later. Fighting for his assets would only prolong a divorce. I understand that’s his money and he had a life before we hooked up, but I’m sure I’d be entitled to something for my aggravation. I wish I would have known this shit when I let Elaine tell him twenty thousand. I guess that was a drop in the fucking bucket for his sad ass.

I was glad when my attorney said it wasn’t extortion since Robert was on tape saying he was willing to pay any price. It was decided the twenty thousand dollars would be punitive damages for Elaine since she too was victimized. The divorce papers I had drawn up states Robert will walk away with his personal assets, his car, and nothing more from our marriage. Unfortunately, I had those bitches drawn up before I knew about the millions. I should have just had his ass taken out and collected it all.

My attorney also said Robert wouldn’t be able to prove my own indiscretions without Kelly. Furthermore, I have his entire confession on Elaine’s voicemail tape, along with the three copies made. Robert being caught on video making the payoff was the icing on the cake. He left another dumb-ass message on Elaine’s voicemail saying he was leaving the money in a mailbox at The UPS Store, with a pickup time, and this time, he added, “I love you,” before hanging up. He had the key sent to her store by messenger. His fool ass used the store next door to the building he works in. Elaine knows full well he works in that building. Then he was caught on camera spying on her as she made the pickup.

With my divorce attorney, comes a damn good private investigator that also caught him soliciting prostitutes––common streetwalking bitches at that. On the voicemail for the number he left Elaine, his fool behind identifies himself as “Joe,” but the phone number is actually registered to him. Being the resourceful wife that I am, I was able to obtain a copy of the phone records for that phone. There were two numbers on there that were kind of frequent, and one of those had been listed on the records for at least six months. The others seem to be recent. Renee’s number didn’t pop up until July, which was after our night at the Megaplex. The bitch probably went skipping off to Robert to tell what she saw that night when Mandingo had his face between my legs.

Ironically, Renee never got more than a Happy Meal or a Scooby snack from Robert. I guess his target was Elaine all along when he got involved with that bitch Renee, who still has something coming her way from me.

Robert’s last night in my house went like this:

It was the following Friday night after Elaine picked up her money. Elaine and Kelly were over while we packed all of Robert’s shit in boxes. Robert came strolling in as usual at 12:30 a.m., pretending to have been working so hard. I had Elaine and Kelly park their cars out of Robert’s view. When he brought his happy-go-lucky ass in the house, he spied the boxes.

“
Hey, what’s up with the boxes?” he asked with a stupid smile still on his face.

“
Oh, we’re just packing up some shit,” I answered.

“
We?”

“
Yeah, I had my sisters to come help me,” I answered as nicely as I could. “Come here. Join me on the sofa. I was watching this hilarious video. I would love for you to see it.” I patted the sofa beside me and hit the remote for the DVD player.

He reluctantly came and sat next to me. “But I don’t understand. Why are your sisters upstairs packing stuff?”

“
Oh, don’t worry about them. They’re just packing stuff I don’t need in this house anymore. Come on and let’s watch,” I said.

He jumped up immediately when he spotted himself watching Elaine make the pickup.

“
Oh, come and sit. It gets even better,” I teased.

He wouldn’t sit. “I demand to know what’s going on, Shawnee,” he said, trying to sound tough.

“
If she doesn’t want to tell you, I’ll be glad to tell you, Robert,” Kelly chimed from behind, coming down the stairs with another box in tow. “You’re leaving, and there ain’t a damn thing you can do about it.”

“
What? What is this all about?” he stuttered.

“
Why don’t we ask Elaine,” Kelly said. “Elaine! Could you come here for a minute? You shouldn’t be working too hard anyway. You might hurt the baby.” Kelly kept a straight face, looking Robert directly in the eye while she spoke as if she’d jump him any second.

Elaine came downstairs carrying an envelope. She handed it to Robert.

“
What’s this? Why are you here?” Robert asked, terrified while taking the envelope. He tore into it and saw the divorce papers. “What? What is this?” he asked again.

“
Need a pen, motherfucker?” I asked.

“
Sister-fucker is more like it,” Elaine corrected.

“
I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he lied.

“
Kelly, give him the other envelope,” I directed Kelly.

She picked up another envelope from the table and handed it to Robert. Again, he tore into the envelope. He saw ultrasound photos of a baby that had the name “Wiggins” typed on the side.

“
Oh my gosh. But you said you were going to abort the baby,” Robert said to Elaine. “I paid you what you wanted. Why are you doing this?”

“
You couldn’t pay me enough to make me kill any baby of mine, Robert,” Elaine said. “Just sign your damn divorce papers, take your shit, and be gone from our lives for good.”

“
Oh, and just so you know, Robert, I have cameras all around recording every bit of our conversations,” I lied. “Sign the papers, and this won’t have to get any uglier and embarrassing for us than it already is. I’m keeping this house and all the contents. You get to walk away with your personal assets, all of your hidden bank accounts, and your car, in addition to ‘Joe’s’ cell phone. If you want to drag this out, we’ll start exploring those other bank accounts that allow you to pay for your mistresses. Speaking of accounts, the joint accounts are empty and the credit cards are cancelled. So don’t even think about those. The way I see it, I was entitled to your portion of what you put in those accounts.”

“
Shawnee, you can’t do this. What about your affair? I forgave you,” he said matter-of-factly.

“
What affair? When did I have an affair, Robert?” I yelled.

“
Kelly knows. You had an affair, too,” he said, getting excited.

“
Don’t try to drag me into your mess. You’re sounding kind of desperate right now. Kelly don’t know nothing!” Kelly said, looking up in the air, doing a ghetto-girl move.

“
I think he’s just trying to play for the camera right now. He’ll say anything,” Elaine added.

“
Robert, the more you open your mouth, the dumber you sound. Just sign the papers. This marriage is over. You fucked my sister blindfolded, and you left the whole damn confession on her voicemail while I listened to you. According to you, you made love to her. Then you didn’t have the decency to wear a condom. So what do you think, we’re going to work things out and raise your baby slash my niece or nephew? Even worse, you fucked that nasty, crusty-ass looking Renee. And damn streetwalkers, Robert?! How desperate could you have been? You are stupid! Sign the fucking papers and get the fuck out of my sight and life forever!” I screamed with tears now in my eyes.

“
What?!” he yelled, playing dumb. “But, Shawnee, this isn’t fair,” he pled.

Right at that very moment, the 70-inch television screen showed Robert picking up two prostitutes from a street corner.

“
Oh yeah, let’s talk about fair,” I said, pointing to the television. “This would be you picking up two hookers off the street, which I believe is an actual crime. Isn’t it, Robert? You’re the lawyer, so you should know.”

“
And you know if he picked those prostitutes up, he does it all the time,” Kelly said, adding her two cents.

“
I’m sure the P.I. that I have following you probably has some more interesting footage from tonight to add to this video,” I warned.

“
That’s invasion of my privacy. How could you?” Robert dared to ask.

“
Oh, you’re a fucking lawyer. Go get a clue!” Elaine yelled. “How could you seriously think the way you violated me wasn’t an unwelcome invasion. You’re a sick puppy. Not to mention all the diseases you have exposed both me and my sister to with your lifestyle.”

“
Robert, I’m warning you. You need to hurry up and get out of here before I lose it,” I said, exhausted from the whole situation. “You know what? I’m going upstairs. There’s your shit that I’m allowing you to have, in the boxes. There are the divorce papers for you to sign without contest, and get the hell out of my five-bedroom house that I’m so thankful I have never bore any children with you in. Do note that I said ‘my house’ since I have that included in the papers. And if I come back down and don’t find signed papers, then we’ll get to the ugly part.”

Then I walked upstairs, leaving Kelly and Elaine with Robert.

Elaine snatched the ultrasound pictures out of Robert’s hand. “Give me these pictures. You won’t be keeping them.”

Kelly was holding a pen in her hand for Robert. “Oh, please let this get ugly,” she threatened.

He conceded, took the pen, and signed. He took the boxes out to his truck and finally left.

For the record, the ultrasound photos belonged to Charise. We had to play nice with her to get them. They came in real handy for the occasion.

So now, Robert’s out of my life. I’ll grieve and then figure out my next step in life. At least I have a fully paid house out of the deal and my freedom back.

24

Harmony

Well, it’s moving day at last. I decided to temporarily put aside my differences and let my sisters come over to see me off. This would be our first gathering since the restaurant incident. Actually, it was Todd’s suggestion. They’ll finally get to meet my well-hidden man. Our girls’ night out had long ago gone to hell. I guess it would require the resurrection of Momma for that to ever happen again.

I had a moving sale the week before. I prefer to buy all new furnishings for my new home. It makes for less packing, as well. I also donated a lot of stuff to the women’s shelter.

“
Boy, didn’t Harmony keep you a secret,” Kelly said to Todd.

Todd just flashed his dazzling smile.

“
For a good reason,” I answered.

“
Well, I’m glad to finally meet the family. I was wondering if my lady was ashamed of me,” Todd teased.

I playfully hit him.

“
No, she was just trying to protect you from all of our drama. I guess she was afraid we’d run you off,” Elaine answered.

“
You got that right,” I said, and we all laughed.

“
She still won’t tell us what state she’s moving to. What state do you live in, Todd?” Charise asked.

“
Please, don’t answer that question. Trust that I have good cause,” I said to Todd.

“
Sorry, I have to stand behind my lady’s decision not to disclose that information,” Todd responded to Charise.

“
That’s wrong on so many levels.” Kelly playfully pouted. “Fine, we won’t let you know what’s going on in our lives either.”

“
That’s just fine with me,” I half joked.

“
Can we at least know what kind of work he does?” Elaine asked.

“
Nope! Then you all would be on the internet trying to track him down to find me. I know you all too well,” I answered.

“
They wouldn’t go to that length, would they?” Todd asked.

“
Yes, we would,” Elaine responded. “Oh, she knows us very well.”

We all laughed and finished packing.

When I had a private moment with Shawnee, I asked, “So are you going to be alright, sis? I know this must be a rough time for you.”

“
To be quite honest, I don’t know what I’m going to do. I have this big empty house and nothing but constant memories of the lie I had with Robert,” Shawnee said with misty eyes. “I’m not going to cry. I promised myself I would not cry today.”

“
Did you make it to the therapist I referred you to? Surely she could help you right now as you sort out your next steps.”

“
What choice did you leave me?” she said with a strained smile. “I talked to her. She seems pleasant. But, the truth is I’m considering leaving D.C. myself. I haven’t told anyone yet. I think I need a change from all the madness.”

“
Change is good. Would you try to transfer your job, or would you be making a clean break from everything?” I asked.

“
Oh, I’m not that broken up to where commonsense went out the window,” she laughed. “I’ve worked too hard to get my position, and I plan on keeping it. I’ll be thirty-nine soon, and I’m not trying to start paying dues all over again to make it to the top.”