Betting the Rainbow (Harmony) (6 page)

Chapter 10

HAWK HOUSE

A
USTIN HAD JUST FINISHED HIS MORNING RUN AND COLLAPSED
in the shade-covered grass beside his house when he heard movement in the willows.

Slowly he stood, shedding his pack and lifting his rifle. Wild hogs could weigh hundreds of pounds, but they had poor sight. If the hog was in the brush there was a good chance he hadn’t spotted a human yet.

Scanning the trees to the lake’s edge, Austin made out Ronny Logan walking toward him. Her slender body seemed to sway with the branches, blinking in and out of sunshine. Like a kid, she tapped the trees and brush with a stick as she walked, one arm swinging free and the other holding the strings of a bag over one shoulder.

He rolled his shoulder as if shucking off the alert, then lowered his rifle atop his pack before she looked up. As always, she didn’t smile, but watched him as if somehow thinking she could understand him just by sight.

Forcing a grin, he stepped into the sun. “You scaring off pigs for me with that stick?”

Pushing down the urge to yell at her and tell her to go back to her side of the trees, he forced an easy manner. If she knew how damaged he was, she’d probably run. Maybe he should warn her. Some days he felt more machine than human. He’d kept everyone at a distance for so long he didn’t know how to talk to normal people. Ronny Logan was shy to start with, and if he growled at her, it would probably frighten her more than the pig had.

But damn if she didn’t look adorable and totally out of place in her tailored linen trousers and silk sleeveless blouse. The woman was a jigsaw puzzle with half the pieces missing. She’d be polite and cold one minute and vulnerable the next.

He didn’t want to even think about how he felt when they’d kissed. That side of Ronny was sexy as hell and was still keeping him awake half the night.

The lady didn’t look at him even now but turned to study Hawk House as if she’d never noticed it before.

“That house doesn’t seem to belong out here on a little lake. It looks like something I saw in Maine. It should be staring out at the Atlantic.”

“Yeah, tell that to my grandfather. I inherited it from my dad, who spent every summer pretending like he didn’t hate having to stay out here away from work for a week.”

“What about your mom? She must have loved it.”

He shrugged. “She split when I was five. I have no idea what she loves. To me, Mom is a Christmas card once a year. But at least I get that. She didn’t even bother to send a card when my dad died.”

Better change the subject before I start blabbering on about being a motherless child,
he thought. “But I loved it out here as a kid. My dad usually got bored by the end of the first week and left me alone with the housekeeper. We had a great agreement for the rest of the summer. I’d leave her alone until dark and she’d feed me supper. I made a few friends and this place was our playground.”

“Is that when you met Kieran?” She walked toward the house, still more interested in it than him.

“You know Kieran O’Toole?”

She shook her head. “My first job was sorting mail in Harmony. I knew his grandmother. She didn’t trust mailboxes, so I’d hold her mail until she walked two blocks to pick it up. Kieran’s grandmother was always talking about him.”

Austin thought he saw her blush, so he waited for more.

Without facing him, she added, “I used to read the postcards he sent her. Folks around here call him the Scot, but he’s lived all over the world. Now and then, he’d asked about you in his notes. Things like, ‘Tell my old friend Hawk hello.’”

Austin stood perfectly still. This was more than Ronny Logan had ever talked to him, and he didn’t want to do anything to screw it up. He figured he had a pretty tight window of opportunity here. Somewhere between shoving her down and making love to her on the grass and asking her in for tea. If he guessed wrong, the only woman he’d found interesting in years would disappear.

“We keep in touch now and then on the Internet.” She didn’t look like she cared, but he had to say something.

He’d never been good with boundaries and he had no idea why she was here this morning, so he’d better be careful. She’d made it plain that she didn’t want him talking to her or touching her the other night when he’d told her about the pig. Maybe she’d just been afraid, or maybe she’d been mad that she came home to find him sitting on her porch.

She kept standing in front of him now, so he guessed she wasn’t ready to leave. He couldn’t think of anything that made sense to say. All ideas for action were R-rated, and he didn’t think she’d be interested.

“You want something?” He finally managed to come up with a question that had sounded better in his head than it did in the air between them.

Now she looked down. But she didn’t run. He considered that progress.

“I want to ask you a favor.” A breeze caught her short hair and brushed it across her forehead, shading her eyes.

Austin relaxed. He could handle that. A favor. Start her car? Drive her to town? Fix her stopped-up sink? “Name it. It’s done,” he answered.

“Aren’t you even going to ask what it is?”

Oh yeah, he should have done that. “Ronny, if I can, I’ll help you out. It’s not complicated. You must think it’s possible or you won’t have walked over here to ask me.”

Finally, she looked at him and he saw indecision in her eyes. “Will you teach me to shoot?”

Holding out a leather case, Ronny looked like she didn’t even know how to open it. The minute he took the small bag, she stepped back as if she didn’t want to stand too close.

He pulled out an old but well-cared-for Colt .45 and turned it over in his grip. “Pretty powerful piece.”

“A friend bought it for me.”

“Mind telling me why you want this?” If she said she needed it to protect herself from her crazy neighbor, Austin swore he’d move.

“Because of the pig. I think I’d better have protection with me or leave. And I don’t want to leave.”

He checked the weapon to make sure it was unloaded and offered it back to her. She didn’t reach for it. “You got any bullets?”

She shook her head. “I forgot to ask for them.”

Austin folded the Colt back into its pouch. “How about we have a cup of coffee on my porch that you think doesn’t belong here and talk about this favor you’re asking for?”

She had that look of a wild animal about to run, but finally she nodded. He walked ahead of her to the porch and held the front door open until she walked in.

The place was all in order, just as he’d found it, with the same layer of dust covering everything. To be honest, he hadn’t noticed until today. The third-floor bedroom, the bathroom, and the kitchen were the only three rooms he used.

“The kitchen’s clean,” he said as she followed him down the hallway.

They silently agreed to suspend conversation while he made coffee. He didn’t miss that she looked around, always returning to the leather gun case on the counter as if it were a rattler in the room.

She held the tray as he stacked mugs, a glass coffeepot, and paper towels. As an afterthought he added a tin of shortbread cookies he’d picked up at the last airport layover before he made it here. “Nearest I have to coffee cake,” he said, trying to act like he had a plan.

“Looks nice,” she lied back.

He held the door again as they moved outside. Huge old wicker chairs sat in one corner. Both looked like they were ready to be tossed, but he’d tried them out and knew they’d hold.

She took a seat carefully and he poured her coffee into a stained mug.

“Thank you,” she said, as if he were handing her fine china.

Austin took his seat and poured his coffee. Neither touched the tin of cookies.

This time it was her turn to break the silence. Austin waited her out.

Finally, she said in a whisper, “What did you and Kieran do out here in the summers?”

Austin relaxed. Safe territory. “One year we built a fort in the trees. I usually go out to make sure it’s still there, hidden away, but this time I think I’ll wait until I know the hogs aren’t out.”

She lifted her cup to her lips, but he couldn’t tell if she drank any coffee or just pretended.

“When we were just into our teens, we spent a few summers swimming with the Delaney girls, but then one summer they wouldn’t speak to us. Might have had something to do with us giving up bathing that year. Or, maybe it was because they developed breasts and realized we weren’t like them.

“I remember every hot summer day Kieran would ride his bike out, and we’d run wild till almost dark like we were the lost boys. His grandmother must have had the same rule as my housekeeper did . . . be home by dark. Only she usually packed him a huge lunch. I’d sneak into the house and steal drinks. Once in a while I’d take a couple of the housekeeper’s beers. She drank so many I don’t think she noticed. Kieran and I would sit in the fort and feel all grown up.”

“It sounds like fun. My mother would never let me play with the other kids in the neighborhood. I spent my childhood staying right beside her. Wherever she went, I went. Summers were usually endless soap operas and trips to the grocery store.”

“You never went wild?”

Ronny smiled. “Sometimes I’d sneak out at night and walk the creek bed behind our house.”

“I’m guessing your mother would like to have you back under her thumb since she came all the way out here the other night.” He could almost see the shy little girl inside the woman before him.

“No. She disowned me when I left home at twenty-seven. I lived on my own for a time, and then my boyfriend moved in for a while. I’ve been traveling since he left. Dallas probably only dropped by to remind me she’s still not speaking to me.”

“You all right with that?”

“With her not speaking to me, yes. With her dropping by, no.”

Austin leaned forward. He’d spent enough time with small talk. “Ronny, want to tell me what you’re afraid of? If you got a gun, I’m guessing it’s more than the pig.”

She stood, walked to the porch railing, and turned her back to him. Her warm brown eyes seemed to hold an ocean of secrets. She crossed her arms as if the morning had suddenly grown cold.

He’d started down this road, he might as well continue. “You don’t want a gun, Ronny. Hell, I’m betting you’re more afraid of it than the pig. Not much chance I can teach you to shoot when you won’t even hold the thing.”

She couldn’t have been more still if she’d been made of glass. He placed his untouched coffee beside her cup and moved beside her.

“I’ll take care of the pig. Don’t worry about him. The Delaneys told me they’ve already called in the game warden. Pigs can do a lot of damage to the land. He could root up several of their pecan trees in one night. Wild pigs eat everything in sight, including pets and small livestock. I promise, before you could learn to load a Colt, the pig will no longer be a threat.”

He brushed his hands from her shoulders to her elbows. Her skin was warm but she didn’t respond; she only turned to stare out into the water.

“You’re not in danger here, Ronny.” He wanted to pull her against him, but she seemed rooted in one spot. “Hogs usually run if they see humans.”

Finally, he rested his hands at her waist, waiting for her to relax or walk away. She felt so good to touch. Almost as if he’d crossed the ropes at an art gallery and was touching a masterpiece.

To his surprise, she swayed slightly toward him as his hand moved slightly. “You’re in no peril here, lady,” he whispered again.

“Yes, I am,” she said when she finally turned toward him. “I’m in danger of feeling, and I don’t want to feel anything, not for anyone and not for you.” Her words were no more than a lingering whisper between them. “If I had a gun I wouldn’t have to run to you if I saw a pig. I could survive alone, without feelings, without caring for anyone.”

What she said almost took him down like a blow to the back of the knees. The honesty frightened him, and he reacted with frustration and anger. “You don’t have to worry, lady, I’m incapable of feeling. I gave it up years ago when I walked out of a fire and left my friends to die.”

Ronny finally stared at him. “You think you should have saved them?”

“No.” For the first time he said the words he’d always thought. “I think I should have died with them.”

He had to get away. He couldn’t answer any more questions. In one fluid movement he jumped from the porch and ran. Maybe away from her. Maybe away from his own reality. He’d just admitted the one reason he couldn’t recover, no matter how hard he worked.

Deep down he knew he should have died.

One shy stranger had drawn out of him what no doctor had been able to do.

The truth.

Chapter 11

HAWK HOUSE

R
ONNY TOOK THE TRAY OF DIRTY COFFEE CUPS INTO THE
house after Austin Hawk simply ran off his own porch and left her there.

She was numb inside, as if she’d frozen from the core out. She had spent a year feeling sorry for herself because her one true love had died, even thought she was somehow a coward for not dying with him, and now Ronny had met a man who mirrored her pain. Only he’d lost all his friends.

His depth of grief made her feel shallow. She’d known Marty Winslow was dying when he moved in with her. She had known, but she’d ignored the truth. Marty had given her time to know that he loved her, a long good-bye, but all she saw was that in the end, he’d left her. He’d left behind money for her to travel the world and Mr. Carleon’s promise to watch over her. In a way, even after a year, he was still loving her, but all she’d seen was the grief.

For the first time since the funeral, she realized what a gift he’d given her and not what he’d taken away.

After she washed the dishes and put them in an orderly cabinet, Ronny went back to her cabin. She wasn’t sure if the day had become cloudy or if it was only her mood, but she pulled on a dark blue rain jacket and walked down to where she’d tied the boat Mr. Carleon had brought her when he’d arrived with the gun.

For once, she didn’t want to be alone, and going back to Hawk House didn’t seem an option.

The old boat was the best Mr. Carleon said he could find on short notice. A blue flat-bottom with a little engine on the back that looked new. Full speed was probably less than ten miles an hour, and it would take a tsunami to flip it over. Mr. Carleon’s one lesson in operating the craft had only taken the few minutes when she’d driven him back across the water to the Delaney dock where he’d left his car.

The rickety dock in front of her cabin was small, made more for jumping in the water than for mooring boats. Ronny stepped around broken planks and climbed into her boat. With little skill, she started the engine. While the sun blinked between clouds, she puttered slowly back across the lake. At this rate she’d know the Delaneys well, coming to call twice in one day.

A few minutes later when she docked, she saw Kieran O’Toole walking out of the Delaney barn.

He knew her just well enough to call her by name. “Would you look at yourself, Ronny Logan. You’re driving a boat, you are.”

His open smile had always been friendly, even when he was a kid. He used to come into the post office when she was eighteen and had just started working. Whoever was on the front desk would send him back to collect his grandmother’s mail. Though younger, he’d already been taller than Ronny and most grown men in town.

She’d been so shy she wouldn’t even look at him. He wasn’t much better, but as the weeks of his stay lingered into summer, they’d manage to say a few more words each time.

She’d been eighteen and he must have been sixteen, because he got his license that summer. Like shy people do, they talked quietly. She’d discovered his keen sense of humor. Over the years that she worked in the back of the post office, she often thought some of what he wrote on the postcards to his grandmother was meant for her.

Apparently, Kieran remembered her also. He rushed to help her tie up. “Maybe I could drive your boat sometime, Ronny. After all, there’s no right or left side of the road to worry about.”

She laughed, remembering his near-death tales of learning to drive when every fool in town was on the wrong side of the road. “I’m guessing, Mr. O’Toole, that you’ve solved that problem, since you’re still alive.”

He winked. “That’s why I took up flying. No roads.”

“So you’re still a pilot?”

“Five years professionally. I do mostly international flights out of New York. In truth, crossing the ocean isn’t near as hard as learning to drive that summer. Granny had just acquired her bifocals and she thought a bug on the windshield was an oncoming car. Luckily, we were on a back road, but my ears hurt for days from both our screaming.”

“I’ve nothing so exciting to report about boating.” Ronny shrugged. “I just learned my way around this little lake an hour ago.”

Ronny almost said she was proud of him for following his dream. For a kid dragged all over the world, it made sense that he’d be at home no matter where he went. His grandmother used to claim her daughter and the crazy Scot she married were like migrant birds born without a sense of direction.

“While you’re here, you want to see some little chicks?” Kieran pointed to the barn. “The Delaneys got dozens delivered yesterday. Cutest balls of fuzz you’ve ever seen.”

Ronny nodded but didn’t take his hand when he offered to help her from the boat.

Ten minutes later she laughed as she sat surrounded by baby chicks. Dusti Delaney came in and welcomed her as if Ronny were a friend and not just someone she’d seen a few times. The good and bad thing about living in a small town is everyone knows pretty much everyone on sight even if they never talk. Dusti might be a few years younger, but Ronny was sure she’d heard of Dallas Logan. Ronny’s mother was at every town hall meeting, usually causing trouble.

Thankfully Dusti didn’t mention Dallas or the fact that she’d once cornered the Delaney girls in a store and demanded to know why their eggs weren’t all white.

Dusti’s one kindness now marked the young farmer as a possible friend, so Ronny offered a true smile to the dark-haired beauty.

“Kieran came over to teach me to play poker if I’ll feed him breakfast first.” Dusti grinned back. “Want to join us? We’re having omelets, of course, and we’ve got plenty.”

Ronny was shaking her head as Kieran said, “Of course she will. She’s probably starving.” He winked at Ronny. “Maybe you can stall Dusti a few minutes while I try to remember how to play. It’s been so long since I’ve sat down to a game. I may have forgotten a rule or two.”

“He’s already bluffing, Ronny. Don’t let his shy ways fool you, the man can charm or lie in several languages.”

“Maybe it’s lucky I came along to referee you two.” She remembered the terrible coffee she’d tried to drink at Austin’s place. It hadn’t gone down well. Breakfast sounded wonderful. “I’ll referee for the price of an omelet.” She didn’t want to go back across the lake. Not now.

Within the hour Ronny had become the dealer while Dusti and Kieran played Texas Hold’em. Dusti’s sister circled past now and then but didn’t seem interested. She obviously didn’t believe in Dusti’s crazy plan to learn to play poker well enough to win a tournament where two hundred people had signed up.

“Half of the entry fee money will go into the library fund,” Dusti explained. “But one lucky player will win the thousand-dollar buy-in to the big-time in Las Vegas, with another thousand going to pay plane tickets and expenses. I’m going to be the one from Harmony.”

“Sure you are, lass.” Kieran laughed.

Dusti stuck her tongue out at him, and the big Scot just grinned as if she’d kissed him on the cheek.

Slowly, Ronny felt the tension of the morning leave her. Dusti assured her the wild hog would be taken care of by a game warden or one of the farmers around them. Kieran even offered to help Austin track the animal.

The cloudy morning passed in easy laughter. Storm clouds were moving in as Kieran walked her back to her blue boat. Ronny had promised to come again to act as dealer for the pair, and they’d all exchanged cell numbers.

In an odd way, they all fit together. The easygoing Scot, the outspoken Dusti, and her, the shadow of a person afraid of the world.

“You going to be all right on the water?” Kieran asked.

She nodded. “You can watch me cross, and if I flip, you can watch me swim back here or home. Whichever’s closer.”

“Right. Say hello to Hawk for me if you see him. In my mind we were Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn those wild summers. I’ve tried to keep up with him but haven’t heard much for six months. I thought the army was probably keeping him busy fighting fires or training. Had no idea he was here relaxing.”

“You two have been friends a long time?”

“We were summer friends as kids. Two strangers sent to spend the summer in a small town where everyone else already had their full serving of friends. We were close but lost track when he joined the army. Now we touch base on Facebook now and then. I heard he specialized in oil rig fires set by troublemakers all over the world. He told me once, when we were both home a few years ago, that sometimes his team goes in to fight a fire with bullets flying. He said half the time they’re in some country he couldn’t even spell.”

“What’s happened to him lately?”

Kieran shook his head. “He didn’t say when I saw him at Buffalo’s, but he was thinner than when I saw him before. Said he was living here for a while. I guess he got out.” Kieran untied the rope. “When we practice poker again, invite him to come if you like.”

“I don’t know him that well,” she said.

By the time she crossed the lake, the howling wind was making Ronny nervous. She tied the boat up to one of the dock boards and ran for the house.

Dusti called her a few hours later to tell her a group of hunters was going after the hogs as soon as the rain stopped, but Ronny’s nerves still hadn’t settled. Rain pounded the cabin, making it seem more like evening than afternoon.

She hadn’t slept well the night before. Even her nap on the porch wouldn’t work today. She felt a restlessness in her body that she could never remember feeling.

A little after nightfall, the lights flickered and died, blanketing the cabin in deep shadows. It took her several minutes to locate the lanterns she’d tucked away thinking she’d never need them. Flipping one on, she thanked Mr. Carleon for remembering to put batteries in it.

The light made her cabin glow in an eerie light, not enough to read by, too much to sleep with.

Finally, feeling trapped, she decided to step out on the porch and see if the lights were out at the Delaney place also. Every night the glow of their barn light was like a setting moon across the lake. It offered her comfort but no company.

She wrapped herself in the blanket that covered the back of the cabin’s old couch and opened the door.

Two steps out, her feet sloshed in water. If she didn’t know better she’d swear it was raining sideways, coming straight off the lake.

The rain was too hard for her to see her shoreline, much less across the lake. She stood, letting the cold water brush over her toes while she decided this was what lonely really felt like. Maybe if she hadn’t spent the afternoon laughing? Maybe if she had something to keep her busy? Maybe if she’d stop running and start living, then she’d care about something or someone again?

Her heart seemed colder than her feet. Blinking, she couldn’t tell if her face was wet with rain or if she was crying.

Staring into the night, she tried to will the Delaney barn light to shine.

As she turned to go back inside, she saw the silhouette of a man leaning against the cabin at the far corner of the porch. He was sheltered from a direct downpour, but wind rattled his thin coat.

Gulping down a yelp, she squeaked out, “Austin?”

He straightened, his raincoat hood pulled low like it had been that first time she’d seen him.

“I didn’t mean to frighten you.” His words were caught in the wind and seemed to circle around her. “I just came over to see if you were here and all right.”

She glanced out at the storm. “Where else would I be?” This didn’t seem like a good time for a walk.

“I don’t know,” he shouted, angry as usual. “I saw you motoring off this morning like you thought you knew what you were doing. I didn’t see you come back. About an hour ago, I noticed the storm had washed that blue flatbed boat up on my shore. Hell, if you weren’t here I’d already decided I’d have to go get help to dredge the lake.”

She tried to see him in the shadows. “You thought I drowned?” She was surprised how much it meant to her that he cared.

He didn’t answer. He just stood there like a tall lamppost with the light shot out.

She took another step toward him. “You were worried about me?”

No answer.

Ronny moved closer. “You thought I needed help?” The man was not only bad tempered and moody, now he was going deaf. “You really thought I might have drowned in the lake?”

He swore. “Of course I thought you drowned. What else would I think? It never occurred to me that you’d not be smart enough to pull the boat to shore and tie it to a tree. Hell, that dock of yours is little better than driftwood. I’m surprised you don’t fall through one of those broken boards and dunk yourself every time you walk out on that platform.”

She was a foot away and could see his irate features. Calm, she thought of him as handsome. Mad, he was downright frightening.

One step closer for a better look. She’d expected to see anger in his eyes. It shocked her to see fear. He’d been truly worried about her, afraid for her!

“I know people die, Austin, but you don’t have to worry about me.” Ronny wasn’t sure why she yelled those words at him. Maybe it was the storm, or maybe it was because she was being yelled at. She lowered her voice. “But I’m still alive—and I’m not going to bother you again, so you don’t have to run away when you see me. You keep to your side of the willows and I’ll keep to mine. From now on just consider me your out-of-sight neighbor and
don’t
bother waving when you happen to
not
see me.”