Authors: Sheila O'Flanagan
‘I know.’
‘It turned out to be a very bad decision on the editor’s part,’ he said. ‘Making you available to our competitors!’
‘It didn’t seem like that at first,’ Sheridan confessed. ‘None of them wanted to hire me.’
‘But you’ve got a great job now,’ Paudie said. ‘So things have worked out well all round.’
‘I know.’ She grinned. ‘The last few horoscopes I wrote for the
Central News
talked about not holding back and then reaching for the stars. I don’t know what made me write them. But next thing I knew I was offered the job. I was thinking to myself then that maybe I should stay as the resident astrologer.’
Paudie laughed. ‘Perhaps we can call on your talents again in the future.’
‘Myra is way better than me,’ said Sheridan. ‘She’s so patient with the contributors. I was a bit too demanding sometimes.’
‘You were fine,’ said Paudie. ‘You’re a good person, Sheridan Gray. And a great competitor.’
‘Thank you.’
‘And I’m delighted you’re going out with my son.’
She blushed. ‘It’s early days . . .’
‘True.’ His eyes twinkled.
‘. . . and I’m living in Dublin again.’
‘I like that about you,’ said Paudie. ‘No giving it all up for love.’
‘I do love Joe,’ said Sheridan. ‘I’ve never loved anyone the way I love him. But I need something for myself too, and that’s my job. Besides, he spends a lot of time in Dublin. So it’s working out well for us.’
‘Good,’ said Paudie. ‘He deserves to be happy. So do you.’
‘I am,’ Sheridan told him. ‘I really am.’
It had been a long time since March Manor had been used for a function, and the festival committee walked around the house with interest, commenting on the ornate plasterwork, the elegant drapes, the crystal chandeliers and the variety of paintings that hung on the walls. It was all tastefully done, they agreed. Paudie had an eye for style and beauty.
Nina Fallon thought so too as she stood in one of the drawing rooms that looked out over the fields behind the house. She’d been reluctant to come to the dinner, feeling uncomfortable about seeing Paudie now that their past was
shared. But he’d simply welcomed her as part of the group and hadn’t said anything to her to make her feel ill at ease.
‘It’s a lovely view.’
She whirled around and was, for the first time in years, face to face with him alone.
‘Yes.’ Her voice was croaky. ‘Stunning.’
‘You have a nice view from the guesthouse too.’
‘Hopefully that will help it sell,’ said Nina.
Paudie looked at her sympathetically. ‘You’re still going through with that?’
‘I have to,’ she said. ‘Sean wants his share, and he’s entitled to it.’
‘Seems harsh.’
‘Life can be harsh.’
‘True. But that house has been in your family for years.’
‘It’s only a building when all’s said and done,’ said Nina. ‘And maybe it’s a good thing.’
‘How?’
‘I was getting tired of it,’ she admitted. ‘It’s tough work in difficult times. Even in good times. I don’t want to look after people all my life. There are other things I can do.’
‘Oh.’ Paudie looked surprised.
‘I don’t know what yet,’ said Nina. ‘I haven’t decided. But there should be enough money left over after the house is sold and the mortgage repaid for me to spend a little time doing something else. Travelling, maybe. I always wanted to travel but it was never really possible when I was running the Bawnee River. I might study too,’ she added. ‘I was thinking of taking a course in behavioural science.’
‘Really?’
She nodded. ‘There are so many things I haven’t done.
Selling up gives me a chance to do them.’ She took a deep breath. ‘Paudie, I have to tell you that I didn’t realise what was going on between Sean and Elva. When it all came out, the only thing I thought about was how to keep things as they were supposed to be. I let Sean manipulate me into forgiving him. I wanted to pretend that it had never happened. Only you can’t do that, can you? Sooner or later you have to face up to it.’
‘There’s no chance of you and Sean getting back together?’
She shook her head. ‘I’ve moved on from Sean. Maybe I should have done it before, but the circumstances were different then. The kids are upset, but they’re grown up, they have their own lives to worry about. Sean’s going from strength to strength in his TV career. I don’t begrudge him that. I’m glad for him. But I’m glad for me too.’
‘Did you tell Alan and Chrissie about Sean and Elva?’
‘No. I couldn’t see the point.’
‘You’re one of the most philosophical people I’ve ever met,’ said Paudie. ‘I thought you’d be bitter about everything.’
‘At first I was, but then I realised there was no point,’ Nina said. ‘It doesn’t change what happens, and all it does is eat away at your insides.’
Paudie nodded slowly. ‘I was bitter too,’ he said. ‘Bitter that Elva needed Sean more than me. Bitter that she was prepared to live a lie because even though she loved him she wanted what I could give her.’
‘And do you still feel that way?’
‘Strangely, no,’ said Paudie. ‘It’s quite weird, I suppose, because it’s been with me for ever, but ever since JJ came home and we talked about it, I’ve felt differently.’
‘Maybe sharing helped.’
‘Maybe.’ Paudie sounded doubtful.
‘You were hiding it from them,’ Nina said. ‘That probably wasn’t a good thing in the long run.’
‘Probably not,’ agreed Paudie. ‘I guess I wasn’t great as a father.’
‘Don’t be silly,’ said Nina. ‘You did your best.’
‘My best wasn’t quite good enough.’
‘Oh, look, when it comes to being parents, we’re all muddling our way through,’ Nina told him. ‘We think we’re doing the right thing, but sometimes we make mistakes. They get over it, though. I’ve got two great children. And yours have all turned out OK.’
‘I have four wonderful children,’ he said, his eyes fixed firmly on her.
‘Yes,’ she agreed. ‘Each one of them deserves you as a dad.’
‘I wish I’d talked to you like this before,’ said Paudie. ‘These few minutes, this conversation . . . it’s made such a difference to me.’
‘You can talk to me any time you like,’ said Nina. ‘Though I could be in South America or somewhere equally exotic by the time you want to chat again.’
‘Come to dinner some evening,’ he suggested. ‘When the house isn’t full of other people.’
She looked at him quizzically.
‘Just dinner,’ he said quickly.
‘I’d love to.’
‘Excellent,’ said Paudie. ‘I’ll look forward to it. Now I’d better join the rest of the guests. Robbie is going to start belting them out in a few minutes, and he doesn’t like to have his audience arriving late.’
The music could be heard outside of the house and across the huge swathe of meadow behind it.
‘It’s kind of bearable at this distance,’ said Sheridan. ‘I can’t imagine what damage he’s doing to the committee’s collective eardrums inside.’
Joe chuckled. ‘Most of them were fans. They would’ve worshipped at Robbie Dunston’s altar.’
‘It’s not my thing,’ said Sheridan. ‘But he’s a nice man. It’s hard to imagine him snorting coke and smashing guitars and doing all those rock-star things.’
‘Maybe we all settle down eventually,’ said Joe.
‘Maybe.’ She walked barefoot through the grass and then turned to him. ‘I was going to suggest that this was my rock-star moment, but it’s more of a sixties hippy thing, isn’t it? Barefoot in the grass.’
‘You make a beautiful hippy,’ said Joe.
She smiled at him. She was wearing the green dress. It was the first time he’d got to see it, and his eyes had opened wide. She’d explained that she’d bought it for the date that had been interrupted by the school siege, and he’d looked at her ruefully and said that if she’d been wearing that dress, he’d never have let her walk out of the restaurant.
‘That makes you sound very shallow,’ she teased.
‘That’s men for you,’ he said. ‘Truly, Sheridan, I’ve never seen you look so lovely.’
He repeated his words now as he looked at her standing in the moonlight, her fiery red hair cascading around her shoulders, the green dress enhancing all the good things about her body.
‘You look fairly all right yourself,’ she told him.
He walked over to her and kissed her. She was getting
used to being kissed by him in the open air. But she hoped she’d never get tired of it. She didn’t think she would. She knew she’d found exactly what she’d been looking for. Love. Happiness. And the right person to share it with. Which, she thought to herself as she leaned her head on his shoulder, was something that could only be described as a totally win-win situation.