Better Than Chance (15 page)

“Mine tends to always be the last place I visited. I’m unoriginal that way. I love it all.”

“Well, then where was the last place you were that you liked? This is great, by the way. Thank you.”

My heart did a funny little flip at his compliment. Damn, I was easy.

“My last vacation was to Miami for the White Party.”

Peter placed a hand over his mouth to keep from laughing out loud with a mouth full of food.

“You really are gay if you know what that is, then, aren’t you?”

He quickly regained composure, though his smile was firmly in place as he picked up his fork to spear a potato.

“I mustn’t have done a very good job of fucking you if you have to ask that.”

Just like that, all the blood in my body went south. My cock was instantly hard and heavy between my thighs making me feel more than a little breathless. A glance in Peter’s direction told me he felt it too. An electric current sizzled between us. He was staring at me with lust and longing in his eyes. I opened my mouth to say something… anything to get the balance back, to return to a safe zone, but I couldn’t do it.

I leaned closer to him, our knees brushing under the counter, our elbows brushing above while our gazes locked. Peter made up the distance. I heard myself sigh aloud as our lips touched. Peter turned in his seat and pulled me closer to him as he darted his tongue inside my mouth. I tasted the chardonnay on his lips and on his tongue. I wanted nothing more than to crawl onto his lap, to be as physically close to him as I possibly could be.

Fuck it. If all I was getting was one night, I was taking it. I would deal with regrets later.

I moved completely into his space, never breaking the kiss, as I brought my arms up to circle Peter’s neck. I pressed our bodies close as I rose to stand between his legs. The height was all wrong now, though, and we both groaned in frustration at the loss of physical contact. Peter stood suddenly and molded his body to mine. I could feel his hard-on through my sweat pants, and it turned me on like a switch. I rubbed my pelvis against his to create a friction of any sort. I wanted him again. Now. Here on the kitchen island or maybe over the table. I didn’t care how. Just now.

Peter’s hands were all over me. He was all about getting to my bare skin. His hands roamed up inside my shirt, tweaking my sensitive nipples before sliding behind me to caress my back and my ass. I whimpered when I felt one of his fingers riding between my ass cheeks.

“Any condoms down here or do we have to go upstairs?” He purred in my ear, then licked the shell and bit my earlobe, sending shivers running down my spine.

“Desk drawer, next to the refrigerator.” At least I hoped I had one in there. Preferably lubed.

Peter went to retrieve the condom, fumbling through two-dozen pens, scissors, and God only knows what else in my kitchen junk drawer. He gave me a “what the hell?” look before he struck gold and flashed a pirate’s grin in my direction. My knees weakened at the sight of him opening the condom and pulling the sweats down just far enough to release his turgid cock. My breathing was fast and erratic as I waited for him to come back to my side. He stopped in front of me, fastening his lips over mine in a passionate kiss. I felt a slight pressure on my shoulder and looked up into Peter’s eyes. The sensation of his bare cock against my stomach was intoxicating. His very masculine presence and evident desire were exhilarating. I was ready to go all over again. He licked at my lips again and held my chin upturned in his hand.

“Suck me, Jay.” He pushed at my shoulder again, in case I didn’t quite understand the message a second time.

I dropped to my knees on my kitchen floor and quickly obeyed his order. I had wanted this almost from the moment I met him. To feel and taste him on my tongue. It was a good thing I was on my knees; desire would have brought me there either way. Peter’s dick was leaking judicious amounts of precum, and it was hard to the point of looking painful. I licked at the broad head, tasting him for the first time, and groaned in delight. I love sex. Period. But the truth was that I loved the taste of a man more than anything. And Peter tasted amazing. Special. I teased him with cat-like licks, ignoring the pressure of his hands on my head.

“Fuck!” he growled as I finally gave in and swallowed him whole. I sucked and licked at him like a man possessed. I couldn’t get enough. His strong hands suddenly stopped my movement, and he pulled me effortlessly to my feet. Peter wanted something else.

He pulled my sweats down far enough to cup my bare ass in his hands, kneading the flesh as he ground his hips into mine. My stomach was damp from our collective precum. We were both on edge. Peter picked me up and shuffled a few feet back, leaning me against the sturdy wood surface of the kitchen table.

“Can I fuck you again? Can I fuck you here?” His voice was low and thick with desire. I couldn’t speak, so I nodded and sat back on the table, thankful that it was well made and would hold my weight. I opened my legs wide and invited my lover in. Peter made quick work rolling on the condom before he plunged inside my tight channel. I gasped at the sensation, but wrapped my legs around his ass and used the heels of my feet to urge him on.

It was a fast fuck. Pleasure for pleasure’s sake. I held on as Peter plunged in over and over, coming seconds after I did. Other than grunts and moans, we were silent in our quest for release. Peter rested his forehead against mine and kissed me before pulling himself gently from my body. I sat up on the table feeling a little disoriented and amazed by our rapid and intense passionate spiral.

Peter was at my side a moment later with some wet paper towels. He wiped up the semen coating my stomach and made a motion for me to turn around so he could do the same with my ass. My eyebrows shot up and Peter laughed.

“Now you’re feeling modest?”

“Yes. I can wash my own parts. Thanks all the same.”

He looked like he wanted to argue with me, but decided to grant me this one. He nodded, disposed of the paper towel, and washed his hands at the sink before turning back to face me.

“You still hungry? For food?” I asked lamely.

Peter chuckled and leaned in to kiss me once more on the mouth. It was an affectionate, sweet kiss. A boyfriend-like kiss. I relished in the sweetness of the gesture while mentally kicking myself as I felt the fall begin. It was like being pushed over a waterfall, knowing you have no choice but to follow its course and let it take you where it will. I didn’t know how I would manage any of that when this was all I was going to get.

The whole night was magical. We finished our dinner, washed dishes, and cleaned the kitchen together. Conversation was light and easy. We never seemed to run out of things to talk about. Food, work, more travel. We made love a third time in my bedroom. It was slow and sweet. I could have wept at the perfection of our joining. He fit me so well. He was big and masculine in all the right ways, and he seemed to know exactly what to do to make me fly.

When I woke the next morning, I was alone in my bed. The sun was making a gallant attempt to break through the morning clouds while birds chirped joyfully outside my window. But my lover was long gone. Unlike my one-night stand with Justin the waiter, my heart felt a little heavy at Peter’s absence. Like then, I knew that nothing could come from our night together, but I was a fool. Peter was nothing like Justin. He was no ordinary one-night stand, and he wasn’t going to be so easy to get over.

6

“E
ARTH
TO
Jay! Hel-lo…. Are you listening or am I alone here telling you my woes?” I looked over at Aaron, who was in full diva mode with his hands on his hips and his expressive features plainly showing his irritation with me.

“Sorry. I spaced. What did you say?”

Aaron had stopped by my place, hoping to talk me into going for a run. I knew I should go, but I was feeling a little mopey and there was no way I could hide it from Aaron. I busied myself at the sink, making a full production out of getting a glass of water. When I turned back around, Aaron was in the same pose. He wasn’t going anywhere now. That boy was nothing if not tenacious.

I shrugged and tried for a smile that I knew wouldn’t fool him for a second. Then I fell into one of the chairs at the island. I couldn’t sit at the kitchen table now without thinking about what Peter and I had done there. The memory was sweet, but it didn’t chase away the gloomy feeling I’d had in the week since we’d last been together.

“What’s up, Jaybird? Tell me everything.” Aaron dropped his stance and took the chair beside me. His hazel eyes were full of concern, and I felt myself crack.

I gave a humorless half laugh and crossed my arms over my chest in a defensive manner. I was a mess, and I didn’t know how to deal with my own stupidity let alone share it with Aaron.

“Come on, honey. You’re worrying me. What’s going on? You can tell me.”

“Oh, A… I don’t even really know what my problem is. Actually maybe I do.”

“Go on,” he urged patiently.

“It’s Peter. I wasn’t going to do anything, but I did and now he’s all I can think about. I don’t want to see him and embarrass either of us. This wasn’t part of the deal. It was one night and one night only.”

“You slept with your boss?” Wow, he was good.

I nodded miserably.

“Oh boy.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Was it amazing? No, don’t answer that. It doesn’t matter right now… although I really do want to know, so please set it aside for a time when you’re mentally stable and up to sharing the juicy details. For the time being, let’s ignore the sex and discuss the aftermath.”

I rolled my eyes at him. His flair for drama was legendary.

“The aftermath is simple. I did what I promised myself I wouldn’t do. Ugh. Everything was much easier when I hated him!”

“Now you’ve slept with him and you like him, but you won’t let yourself explore any possibilities with the boss man. Is that it?”

“We agreed it was a one-time deal. Something we needed to do to take the edge off, so to speak. Look, I’m just being an idiot. I haven’t seen or talked to him in a week, and I wish things were different. I wish we didn’t work together. I wish one of us would throw caution to the wind and say ‘who the fuck cares?’, but… I don’t know if he feels the same way anyway. So I’m just… pathetic.”

Aaron looked me over carefully before gently bumping my arm with his.

“Why can’t you tell him how you feel, honey? You aren’t working on a project at the moment so surely there isn’t a problem with you seeing each other, right? I mean, doctors date nurses and other doctors and hell, at my magazine, one of the secretaries was totally doing the editor. Granted, their discretion was not their strong suit, but that wouldn’t be an issue for you. You could be very discreet. Hell, you could even be secretive about it if you had to be. It’s no one’s business but your own, right?”

“He won’t agree. He said we could be friends, but I would suck at that. It’s no good lusting after your friends.”

“True.” Aaron brushed at my hair in a sweet, soothing gesture. “But if you ask me… you have nothing to lose. If he says ‘bad idea, not interested,’ then he’s probably a prick and you’re better off… just kidding. If he says no, at least you tried. If he says yes… who knows what will come of it?”

I looked over at Aaron’s beautiful, earnest face and mulled over his suggestion.

“Maybe you’re right. He already thinks I’m a little odd anyway.”

“You are.” I shot him the dirty look he was looking for. “But something tells me that’s what he likes about you, sweetie.”

A
ARON
WAS
right. I needed to say something one way or another to Peter. I couldn’t pretend to be cool about what basically amounted to one of the best nights of sex I’d ever experienced. It wasn’t in me to be nonchalant about… well, anything really. Which is why I never should have agreed to one night with him in the first place. Peter hadn’t contacted me at all since our night together, but I found out through a little sleuth work that he was traveling on the West Coast and was due back at the office for a meeting the following afternoon.

I gave myself a pep talk that morning about how I should approach him and what I should say. The way I had it worked out, there was little to no reason for him to do anything but agree that we should give this thing between us a go. Nothing… I repeat nothing ever goes as I plan, though.

Rebecca rapped on my open door midafternoon to remind me about a conference call I was scheduled to be on in five minutes. I was so wound up that I was tempted to snap at her that I really wasn’t a complete moron and I knew how to keep track of my calendar. Maybe it was self-preservation and a fear of losing my daily caffeine supply that kept my mouth in check, thankfully, but I just nodded and offered a wan smile. She took that as an invitation to chat.

“Jay honey, you look a little tense. Are you okay?”

I bit my lip to keep me from saying something mean, and looked up at my worried secretary. She was juggling a set of binders in her arms, peering down at me over the reading glasses perched on the end of her nose. She looked overburdened but had cared enough to stop and ask how I was. I stopped what I was doing and jumped up to help her, grabbing a couple of the binders just as they were about to fall.