“Jax…are you sure?”
“I’m sure.” He grins.
“Oh god, I was so worried.” I say, tearing up.
“Come on, I need a shower. Jack mind if we crash for the rest of the night?”
Jack smiles. “Go for it.”
It take Jax’s hand, and he leads me upstairs into the spare room. When he begins to undress for the shower, he removes his coat, and I see blood all over him. I gasp and reach for him.
“You are hurt.”
“No, that is not my blood.”
I should know by now; Jax is a pirate; it doesn’t bother him to kill. I step back, shocked. There is a lot of blood; it would have been gory. I tremble, and Jax tilts his head to the side.
“Does that bother you?”
“H-h-how did you kill them Jax?”
“I had some of the boys with me. I wasn’t alone. I shot most of them.”
“Most of them?”
He sighs. “Jade…don’t make me give details.”
“I just want to know.”
“I snapped some necks, stabbed some and…”
“And?” I gulp.
“Decapitated a few with swords.”
I faint. Literally. I fall to the ground and slam my head on a nearby table. I wake to Jax slapping my cheeks, yelling at me to wake up. I blink up at him; he decapitated a few. Cut their heads off. He couldn’t be serious? Not Jax, not the father of my child. I whine and slap his hands away.
“Don’t touch me.”
He runs his hands through his hair. “Don’t hate me.”
“Y-y-y-y-you….doesn’t it bother you?”
“They are murderers and scum bags. No it doesn’t bother me.”
“Why couldn’t you just shoot them?”
“We had to dispose of them Jade, it
’
s easier if they are in…parts.”
I blanch. “Oh god, I think I am going to be sick.”
I crawl towards the bathroom, dry retching. I know it’s stupid. It's who he is. We have had this problem from day one, from the first time he shot that man at the pub. I knew his point was valid;
they were the scum of the earth and wouldn’t have hesitated if it came to killing me or my daughter. Tears pour down my face; I have been with pirates for a long time now, but the shock of death is still raw.
“Jade, breathe…”
Jax is kneeling beside me, and I am panting. He takes my hair and sweeps it from my face, then he takes hold of a nearby wash cloth and wipes it across my forehead.
“Baby, come on breathe.”
I can’t breathe. Death, it
’
s everywhere. It's my life. Someday soon, I would have to bring it upon Ben and his crew if I were to save my family. Death. Everywhere.
“I can’t breathe!” I gasp.
“Come on.”
Jax takes me into his arms and rubs my back, encouraging me to take deep breaths. Finally, my breathing slows, and I cling to him. I love him, whole heartedly, without a doubt. I just find it so hard sometimes, to imagine him inflicting such cold, hard, murder on somebody.
“I am sorry,” I say with a crackly voice. “I know it’s how you have to be.”
“It takes a long time to get used to Jade, I understand.”
“H-h-have you let Sammy know?”
“Yeah, I rang her.”
“You called her before me?”
I pull back from him and he groans, running his fingers through his hair.
“Yes I did because I knew you were safe and I wanted her to know she could go home.”
I nod.
“Baby stop this, I can’t keep up with this insane jealousy.”
I glare at him. “Insane jealousy?”
“Yeah.”
“Whatever Jax,” I mutter, shaking my head. “I am tired. You need to go and see Lilly, she was worried about you.”
He sighs and pulls his bloody shirt off before walking out of the room. I shower quickly and climb into bed, rolling to face the wall. I hear him come back in and shower; then I feel his body slide in next to mine. He is hot; his skin warm from the shower. He snuggles behind me, and I know I can’t be mad at him anymore. I roll over, taking his lips with my own and kissing him deeply.
“I guess I am back in the good books then?”
“Let me show you how much.”
I push him onto his back; he doesn’t protest. I lay my body over his and feel him hardening beneath me. That is a fantastic feeling, a powerful feeling. I grind my hips against him, and he groans. I lean down and trail kisses over his jaw and down his neck. When I reach his shoulders, I snake my tongue out and lick him slowly. He hisses and tenses.
I move lower, trailing kisses across his pecks and over his nipples. I take one into my mouth, sucking it until it forms a hard peak. He is growling; his hands are on my shoulders, squeezing. I move over his abdominal muscles, licking them and swirling my tongue around all six. Damn, he is gorgeous. I reach the small pit of hair at the base of his navel and slide myself lower. He lets out a guttural sound, knowing what I am going to do.
I wrap my hand around him, stroking up and down gently; then I take him into my mouth. He groans, writhing beneath me.
“Jesus!” He hisses through his teeth.
I nip at him. “If you wiggle Mr Watts; I will spank you.”
He laughs a ragged laugh. “I bet.”
I take him into my mouth again, and he groans, long and deep. I suck him, hard, swirling my tongue around the base. I lick him up and down and then plunge him into my mouth. His hands are on my head, and he is groaning. I quicken the pace and I can feel him growing bigger in my mouth, harder.
“Jade…stop or I will…”
He tries to push me off, but I don’t move. I continue sucking until I hear his guttural cry and I feel him release into my mouth. I feel the throbbing on my lower lip and I quite enjoy feeling his release so intimately. It’s different, sexual. I don’t realize his hands are tangled in my hair so heavily until I go to move. He lets me go, and we lay side by side, I can hear his panting.
I roll into him and nestle my head in his chest; he smells sensational. I wish I could stay in this spot and never leave. My breathing grows deep, and I am about to fall asleep when I remember I haven't told him about my gift being taken.
“Jax?”
“Yeah?”
“I have to tell you something?”
“You are pregnant?”
I snort. “No.”
“Oh.”
“You want me to be?”
“Sure.”
I freeze. What? “You are kidding, right?”
“Nah, I’d like another one.”
“Now I know why you haven't asked if I am on the pill.”
“I don’t care.”
“Well I am. Not now ok?”
“Yeah, ok but maybe in the future?”
“Sure.”
“What did you want to tell me then?”
I hesitate. He rolls and flicks on the lamp, I squint at the light invading my eyes.
“Jade?”
“I gave away my gift.”
He stares at me for a long, long moment. “What?”
“My father took it back, it’s gone. I can no longer heal others or myself.”
“WHY?” He growls. He’s mad at me?
“Why? Because people don’t care anymore. Oh stuff Jade, she can help herself. Don’t say it’s not true. When Sammy was hurt, and I took on her injuries, you had no sympathy for me. It’s gone, and I am sick of it. I don’t want it anymore.”
He stares at me for a long moment. “I never meant to make you feel that way. What you do with your gifts, I…admired your courage and strength Jade.”
“Well, it
doesn’t matter now.”
“So, you can get sick and…” He pauses and winces. “Die?”
“Yeah.”
He shakes his head and hugs me close. “Now, I will worry about you three times more than I already do.”
“Will do you good.”
He huffs. “Can we go to sleep now?”
“Oh, take the pleasure and roll
over.” I
joke.
“You want me to fuck you? I will?”
I blink up at him. “It was a joke.”
He sweeps a kiss across my lips. “Say the word, I am there.”
“Go to sleep Jax.”
I reach over to flick off the light, and as I do, he takes my nipple into his mouth. I shudder and moan at the sensation. He drags it in deeply, running his tongue around and around.
“Hmmmm, I think you do need me.” He says in a husky voice.
“You are insatiable Watts.”
“You better believe it.”
He grasps me and flattens me on the bed. I let him draw my hands up above my head and hold them there with one of his hands.
“How do you want this?”
“Huh?”
“Slow or quick?”
I grin. “I don’t know sir, how do you like it?”
He grins down at me. “I am aching for you, I want quick.”
“Cheap skate.”
He laughs and grasps my leg, yanking it over his hip. Then he tilts his pelvis forward, and I can feel his erection.
“How many hard ons can a man get in a night?” I ask, my curiosity burning.
“As many as he wants.”
“Right.”
“Stop talking, or I will…”
“Will what?” I smirk, thrusting my hips upwards. He groans and presses closer to me.
“I can roll over and starve you gorgeous, don’t play.”
“Ditto pirate.”
He gives me that lazy, gorgeous grin. “Are we going to fuck sometime tonight?”
“You tell me?”
With that, he slams into me, and I scream out. God, he is way too big for me sometimes. I groan and squirm to adjust myself. He pulls out and pauses.
“Finished playing?”
“You’re too big, go away.” I grumble.
He takes my hips and flips us over, so I am on top of him. He yanks me down and enters me again; I cry out at the fullness. I wiggle my hips about until it doesn’t feel so invading. Then, I slowly rock myself up and down, backwards and forwards.
“There you go,” He says between ragged breaths. “Keep going.”
I quicken the pace and enjoy the feeling radiating through me. It’s a different feeling; I have control. I press him deeper and groan. Oh, this feels nice. I close my eyes, and my mouth falls open. My head falls back, and my hair trails down to my hips. I groan as I feel my release rising to the surface, oh, he feels good. I quicken and quicken the pace until I am riding him hard. He is growling and groaning; his eyes fixed on my breasts.
I scream as my release tears through me, shooting bolts of pleasure through every nerve ending in my body. He grasps my hips and keeps the pace up, thrusting his hips up to meet mine. He is clenching his eyes now; he looks like he is about to explode. Then, he roars as I feel him shoot his release once more. He thumps against me, milking every last ounce of himself and then he slows. I slump down onto his chest.
“Wow.” I murmur.
“Wow alright, you are going to kill me.”
“Ditto. Can I sleep now?”
“You started it.” He says, rolling me off and yanking me to his side.
“Mmmmm.”
I nestle into him, and minutes later, we are both asleep.
CHAPTER
12
When I wake in the morning, Jax isn’t in bed. I slide out and groan. I am sore, for the first time in my life. I move, oh…in odd places too. The junction between my legs is tender. I pull on a nightie and slip downstairs. It’s quiet. I go to walk out the front when I hear talking, I halt and listen. Yes, I know it
’
s rude, but I am curious. I recognize the voices as Jax and Jack.
“Mate, I can’t imagine how it feels to love somebody the way you love her but…you need to accept what is.” Jax say’s.
“I know what is. I have known she is mad about you from the day we met her. She has never let her eyes stray. Even when I slept with her, I knew she wasn’t entirely there. I do wish you happiness Cap; I just don’t want you to hurt her again.”
“I understand. I hate that you are breaking over her.”
“It’s not easy seeing you two together, when I am so madly in love with her.”
“Mate, if I could change things…”
“You wouldn’t Jax. You love her as much, if not more than I do.”
“True, I do. Just remember Jack, she loves you too. Maybe not how she loves me, but she adores you and you are her best friend; she trusts you to the ends of her soul. You don’t have to lose that.”
“I would never leave her, I will always take care of her and be there for her. Don’t worry yourself Cap, I am ok…”
I slip into the kitchen; my heart is throbbing. I feel so selfish. I flick on the radio; I will make breakfast to distract myself. I begin singing along to the music as I pull out some eggs, onions, bacon, capsicum and cheese. I feel a set of arms wrap around me. I grin and grip hold of them. I squeeze the muscled forearms around my waist. Jax nuzzles my ear, and I shiver.