Bermuda Nights - The Boxed Set (21 page)

BOOK: Bermuda Nights - The Boxed Set
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I gently shook my head, cutting him off. As I turned back to Sven, I saw he was lifting an object off the side counter. It was a syringe of shimmering white liquid.

 

He held it up before me. “So this becomes quite simple. We’ll inject him – and then we’ll question him. Rinse, repeat. By the time we arrive Friday morning his body will be soaked in heroin. I’m sure his buddies in the DEA will have less use for him once we drop him off in Boston as an incompetent agent and a heroin user to boot.”

 

He shrugged. “The band must go on, of course. I’ve got a call in to a buddy of mine I played with a few years ago. He’ll be meeting us to take over the spot, at least until we can bring on a fresh player who we can trust.”

 

He waved the syringe in the air. “So, what do you think, Evan? Ready for what I imagine will be your first real taste of heroin? After we give you a regimen of doses, over the next day and a half, I think you’ll find you develop quite a longing for it.”

 

He stepped forward.

 

My heart hammered against my chest. I couldn’t let Sven do it. If Evan was high on heroin, he would be completely vulnerable – and so would I. We’d be lucky if they did just drop us off in Boston racked and ruined. It was more likely we’d be tortured for information and then tossed overboard when they were done with us. No muss, no fuss. No evidence.

 

I threw back my head and laughed.

 

Sven turned on me, his eyes narrowing into angry slits. “And what’s so funny?”

 

I shook my head. “Man, you guys think you’re so smart. And you don’t even know what’s going on in your own band.”

 

His fingers clenched against the syringe. “And I suppose you’re going to tell me.”

 

I strolled over to Evan, willing my hand not to shake as I brought it up to stroke the side of his face.

 

He closed his eyes in half-agony. “God, Amanda, what are you –”

 

I turned to Kayla. “You didn’t even know. I’ve been fucking Evan for a year. Had him on the side, while that slouch, Jeff, was still around.” I winked at Kayla. “Like you said, Evan here’s a sex god, and I knew it the first time I saw him. But Evan’s always broke, so Jeff was good to keep around for restaurants and nights out.”

 

I shrugged. “When Jeff took off west, it was fine by me. Meant I could spend more nights with Evan. By then I was landing my own job. Didn’t need a guy to pay my way any more.”

 

Kayla’s mouth was open in shock. “But you would never do something like that!”

 

I grinned. “You think you know me so well, don’t you? Funny how people change, how people keep secrets.”

 

I turned to Sven. “You know how musicians can be. Money just slipped through his fingers. So, he keeps losing money, we keep fighting, and finally he storms off to this ship. He figures it’s a way to stay clear of me for a few months.”

 

My eyes twinkled and I glanced at Kayla. “But I get to missing him. So then I talk you into coming out on the cruise. I figure I’ll have Evan trapped for a solid week.”

 

Kayla’s eyes were as round as poker chips. “Amanda!”

 

I chuckled. “I knew if I could get my body against his that I’d turn him around. And sure enough, I did.”

 

Sven’s face wavered between disbelief and relief. “Then what the hell was all of that about the hotel on Bermuda about? Why would he want you off the ship?”

 

I turned to Evan. “Evan, sweetie, why don’t you tell them why we used to fight. Why don’t you explain why you gave up on me and took off on this cruise.”

 

His face was pale. He could see where I was going with this. I knew he was desperately searching for another way out.

 

But there was none.

 

His voice was a rasp. “Amanda, no –”

 

I grinned, turning back to Sven. “One of Evan’s good buddies died of a heroin overdose a few years back. It affected him deeply. So when he found out I was a user, he was furious. Tried to get me to stop. Dragged me to meetings. And finally he stormed out completely. Left Boston and said I was on my own.”

 

Kayla stared at me as if my eyes had turned into cubes of glowing ultraviolet. “Amanda, but how about Tanya?”

 

I laughed. “C’mon, Tanya was years ago, and besides, she didn’t know what she was doing! I
smoke
the stuff. Perfectly safe. It’s like grass, just with a stronger kick.” I nudged my head toward Evan. “But he didn’t see it that way.”

 

His voice was a groan. “Amanda, you can’t –”

 

I turned back to Sven. “So you see his problem. He wanted to fit in with you guys and to make a good impression. Sure, he pretended to want to do heroin. He didn’t want you to think he was some loser dweeb.”

 

I shrugged. “But when I came on board? And it looked like I would realize you had a large stash of high quality heroin? You bet he tried to get me off the ship as soon as possible.” My eyes glowed. “Especially when it appears you have China available. I’ve
dreamed
about trying that stuff.”

 

I reached forward and plucked the syringe from Sven’s fingers.

 

Kayla made a choking noise. “Amanda, I can’t believe this is you!”

 

I arched an eyebrow at her. “With all the lies and hiding you’ve done over the years? I’d think you’d be used to this by now.”

 

She sputtered. “But not from you!”

 

I grinned. “Just goes to show how good I am at it.”

 

I held my left arm out to Sven. “Will you do the honors?”

 

His eyes lit up with approval, and he grabbed the rubber tie from the counter.

 

Evan’s voice was hoarse. “Amanda – don’t do it. Please.”

 

Sven’s gaze danced. “Guess you were right, Amanda. Seems your lover has a thing about you and H.”

 

I shrugged, winking at him. “Not everyone appreciates it the way we do.”

 

He finished his tourniquet around my upper arm and stepped back. His grin was wide. “Well, then, enjoy. I always like being the one to bring the first taste of China White to a fan.”

 

Time stilled.

 

I could hear each of Evan’s ragged, indrawn breaths. I felt the vibration of each beat of my heart. The shimmering tip of the syringe raised in my hand, swung sideways, and then gently laid against the soft, pale-blue bulge of my vein. I could almost see the depleted red blood cells drifting and swirling as they headed back toward my heart.

 

In a moment they would swim in a new type of broth.

 

I raised my eyes to meet Evan’s. I could see the anguish in them, the desperate wish that there was something – anything – he could say to make me stop. But if he revealed the truth, we were both dead.

 

I knew this was the only way.

 

His lips formed the words, and I felt them expand and shimmer throughout my entire soul.

 

I love you.

 

The needle pierced my skin, and I pushed in the plunger.

 

Book 3: The Soulless Abyss

Chapter 1

Do not leave me in this abyss,

where I cannot find you!

Oh, God! it is unutterable!

I cannot live without my life!

I cannot live without my soul!

-- Emily Brontë

 

Sven undid the tourniquet on my arm with a flourish. I watched the plunger slowly, methodically press down, as the China White heroin left its crystalline cocoon and embarked on its journey into my blood stream. My heart hammered against my ribs, and I knew only one thing for certain.

 

If I didn’t make it through this, both Evan and I would be dead.

 

The plunger reached the bottom.

 

I withdrew the syringe from my arm and Sven took that from me, stepping back with a smile. I barely registered his movements. It was Evan’s green eyes I held onto as a life-line, that I focused on as I –

 

Wham.

 

The suddenness of it staggered me. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but not this, not this rush of sensation and richness. It was like that night on the beach with Evan. Moonlight streaming, jasmine in the air, a warm breeze coming off the water, and nothing else in the world mattered. A choir of angels sang for us alone. His hands were massaging me …

 

My mouth fell open, and a soft sigh escaped my lips.

 

An agonized shadow blanketed Evan’s gaze, and he strained against his restraints. His voice was hoarse. “You’ve done your due diligence, Sven. You’ve got your proof that we’re not narcs. Now let me go.”

 

Sven’s eyes twinkled, but he nodded at Hank. Hank pulled a switchblade out of his back pocket and hewed at a rope for a moment, working through the thick coil with patience. It was only a heartbeat before both bonds were cut.

 

Evan crossed the distance between us in two steps, drawing me hard into his arms. He drew my head against his chest, his mouth against my ear. “Jesus Christ, Amanda. What have you done?”

 

Sven’s voice held merriment. “Just safe business practice, Evan. I’m sure you’ll understand. And your girl there will appreciate this elevation of her lifestyle. I doubt she’ll go back to just smoking black tar after this!”

 

I was in heaven. No, heaven was too quiet, too staid. I was in a land of vibrancy, somewhere with Egyptian twirling dancers, pewter pitchers of mead, and curvaceous singers thundering the music of the spheres. The power of it thrilled through every cell in my body. I was one with the song. I was suffocated with joy, infused with passion, and nothing else could matter in the world.

 

Evan’s arms stayed wrapped around me, and he raised his head to look at the others. “I’m taking her back to her room.” He turned his gaze to Kayla. “Could we have some time alone?”

 

Her grin grew wide, and she chuckled. “Absolutely! You two love birds take all the time you need. I’ll just stay with the guys.” Her eyes twinkled. “We’ll find
something
to keep ourselves occupied.”

 

Evan’s arm curved around my waist as he guided me to the door, then through it.

 

The night sky was stunning. Fine diamonds had been spread against an ebony velvet backdrop. As I watched they throbbed, expanded, and twirled. And the air! The freshest tropically-laced salt smell I could imagine. I groaned at the beauty of it.

 

Evan’s groan was more of heartbreak. “Oh, Amanda.”

 

I smiled fondly and snuggled against him as he escorted me down the stairs and across the deck. He was an amazing man, to be so concerned about me. But surely he could see the state of bliss I was in! He should be joyous for me. He should know just how far from mortal feelings I was – how the world drowned me in its comfort.

 

We were stepping in the elevator, and the whoosh of us lowering was transcendent. I could feel every motion of our bodies in space. This is what it meant to be connected to the universe. I could not imagine a more perfect state.

 

We were at my door, he was digging out my key card, and then he was gently laying me in bed. I looked up at him, nearly lost in that gaze of his. I already felt immersed in the afterglow of the most amazing sexual experience ever. I wondered if my brain would simply explode into a thousand crystalline pieces when we made love in this state.

 

I put my hand up to his neck, pulling those luscious, firm lips down to me.

 

He put his hand firmly but gently over mine, and his head did not budge. His voice was soft, hoarse.

 

“No.”

 

I smiled. Surely he didn’t really mean it. Nothing could be wrong. The world was ours. It was just the way it should be. It was a daydream wrapped in a cozy weekend by a warm fire. Mix that in with a campfire on a secluded beach, and the sensation of his tongue easing down the side of my neck …

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