Berch (2 page)

When we get to the bar, Amber has already ordered a drink. She’s always been an every-girl-for-herself type and doesn’t wait for Kayla and me before inserting herself into Berch’s conversation. She grabs Berch’s arm and giggles about something, and jealousy burns in my gut.

Kayla hands me a glass of wine, and I take a sip as we watch Amber in action. I barely taste it as Amber bumps her body against Berch’s while she speaks. Kayla says, “If I ever need a lawyer, Amber’s going to be my first call. Look at her go in for the kill.”

I gulp down more alcohol in an attempt to calm the green-eyed monster that wants to scratch Amber’s eyes out. But then I glance at Berch, and he appears to be enjoying the attention of the ex-head cheerleader. The one who didn’t give him the time of day in high school. “Amber does get what she wants.” Once again, my heart aches for the guy I’ll never have. Although it doesn’t matter, because I’ll be returning to New York anyway. I sigh. “I’m going to go say hi to the mommies and find out what I’m missing.”

“Okay, I’ll catch up to you later.” Kayla makes her way over to Amber and Berch while I head across the room to Jessie.

Jessie was my best friend in elementary school, but we grew apart as we got older. Seeing old friends has made me revisit more than high school memories, and I join the group of women sharing pictures of their children on their phones.

Mattie steps aside to let me in. “Raven, you look great.” She places a hand on her pregnant belly. “What I would give to fit into a pencil skirt.”

I smile at her. “It’s just clothes. You have something much better. Can I see your kids?”

She hands me her phone, and I engross myself in conversations about nursing, swollen ankles, and labor horror stories. I take mental notes in case I need them some day. I’m listening to a discussion on preschool when a hand lands on my shoulder. It’s searing heat tells me right away it’s Berch, but if I hadn’t known, the look on two of the mothers’ faces would have given him away.

Jessie practically purrs. “Berch Lindholm, you’re definitely the most improved at this reunion.”

He pours on the charm. “And pregnancy makes you glow, Jessie. Matt is a lucky guy.”

She blushes, and so do I when Berch leans down to speak in my ear. “A word with you outside?”

The combination of the hot breath in my ear and his voice makes my insides tremble. “Excuse me, ladies. It was nice to see you all.”

I wish Amber were here to witness this, because the waves and giggles from the women make me want to gloat as we turn to walk toward the exit. Berch places his hand at my lower back, and I melt at the chivalrous gesture.

When we get outside, Berch takes my hand and glances back over his shoulder. I’m about to turn around when he hisses, “Don’t look, and please pretend you like this.”

Pretend?
No problem there. I thread my fingers through his. “Let me guess, you’re afraid of Amber?”

“Good guess. Let’s go see if your shoe is ready.”

Imagining the look on her face as she watches us walk to Berch’s truck, I want to skip. “Are you having fun?”

“Yeah. It’s nice catching up with old friends. How about you?”

“Well, I’ve learned more about having children than I was ready to know.” I chuckle. My palm is sweating with the heat of Berch’s hand. “And I’ve also discovered that you have the warmest hands ever.”

We’ve reached his truck, and he lets go of me to pull keys out of his pocket. “Sorry about that.”

“Don’t be. It’s nice.” Berch squints at me as if I might be making fun of him, and I wonder if he’s struggling with the female attention he’s receiving tonight. “You’re quite the attraction in there.”

He sighs as his truck door groans open. “Yeah. It’s weird. I forgot how shallow people can be.”

Shame makes me drop my gaze as I recall how I starved myself and rented an expensive wardrobe to look amazing compared to my classmates. Berch says, “I wasn’t talking about you. You’ve always made me feel like I’m attractive.”

I glance up in surprise. “You noticed?” I cringe. “Oh, God.”

“You weren’t very subtle. Remember the valentine you gave me in the fourth grade?”

I can’t, but have no doubt it was over the top. “I’m so sorry I’m your stalker girl.”

Berch has my shoe in his hand and tests the heel. “Were. You stopped following me around by the time we hit high school.” He hands me the pump. “I missed it when you discovered other boys.”

The leather of the Louboutin is smooth in my hand, and I gaze up at Berch. My pulse quickens in the intensity of his stare. “You did?”

He grabs me by the hips and hoists me onto the seat like he did earlier. This time he slides his hands down the edge of my thighs slowly and leaves them by my knees. The fabric of my Chanel skirt doesn’t protect me from their heat. “You broke my heart when junior prom came and you were dating Parker.”

“Berch.” I reach up and place my hand on his cheek. “I would much rather have gone to prom with you. Why didn’t you ever ask me out?”

He shrugs. “It wasn’t our time.” Berch removes my hand from his face and kisses my palm. I inhale sharply, and he says, “But now might be.”

Wait.
Why is this happening?
I shake my head. I glance over his shoulder. “Amber isn’t watching us. I don’t get it.”

He drops my hand and reaches for my foot. “Do you have a boyfriend?” He slips off my sneaker.

“No. But I don’t live here, and...” Berch’s massaging my arch, and the combination of his strength and warmth makes me moan. He chuckles at my reaction and slips my pump on. “Why now?”

“Why don’t you let me take you out to dinner tomorrow night, and I’ll explain.”

“Fine.” I may be confused, but I’m not stupid. “I mean. Yes. I’d like that.”

B
y the time Berch and I walk back into the Elks Club, I think everyone knows we left together. I’m uncomfortable with the stares and excuse myself to go to the ladies’ room. Kayla must have noticed, because she comes in after me.

She speaks through the stall door. “Great shoes. Louboutin?”

“Yes.” I try to sound casual, but deception is weighing on my conscience.

“I thought so because of the red soles. Was that all you went to get?”

“Uh-huh. But I got more.”

She squeals. “Sweet!”

I don’t want to yell, so I don’t talk until I’m at the sink. The soap dispenser clicks, and pink gel lands in my palm. “He asked me out.”

Kayla and Amber were my best friends, and both were aware of my lifelong crush on Berch. Jessie comes in and smiles at us before entering a stall while Kayla says, “Finally. What did it take? A thousand shooting stars, single headlights, and fifteen or so wishbones?”

I grin at her. “Something like that.” I cut my eyes to where Jessie is and say, “But I don’t understand why now. I haven’t even talked to him since high school.”

“Maybe he didn’t know how much he cared until you were gone,” says Kayla.

I crank down a paper towel, and Jessie joins us at the sink. I say, “I doubt it.”

Jessie says, “He’s afraid you won’t come back next time.”

I glance over at her. “What?”

“You’ve been in love with Berch since we were playing in sandboxes. You were meant to be together, and he took it for granted. This time, he’s not going to.” Jessie speaks as if she’s sure what she said is true.

The door squeaks as Kayla opens it for us to leave. I say, “Maybe.”

Once we’re out of the ladies’ room, Kayla and I raise our eyebrows at each other over Jessie’s words before Amber accosts me. “How the hell did you get a date with Berch?”

Her fingers dig into my arm, and I’m reminded of how our friendship was based on her convenience. I shrug. “He asked.”

She glares at me. “That’s a pretty crappy thing to do to a friend. You knew I was after him tonight.”

Kayla laughs and says, “You’re joking, right? You finally noticed what we’ve known all along, and you think you can call dibs on Berch?”

Amber snorts, “Girl code. Read it.”

Kayla says, “Sue me. Have you forgotten Raven’s been in love with him since birth? Because Berch belongs to Raven. End of story.” She grabs my arm. “C’mon.” We walk away, leaving Amber to sputter and stomp her feet on her own.

I link my arm with Kayla’s. “I’ve missed you. And why didn’t we dump her sooner?”

“Because she always had a car, remember?”

I do. Kayla and I got close freshmen year when we both made varsity soccer. When Amber made the team sophomore year, she decided we were the three musketeers. Neither Kayla nor I was assertive enough to push her away, and we encountered a lot of needless drama because of it.

When we get to the middle of the room, Kayla and I scan the crowd. A group of guys is laughing loudly, and I assume the alcohol has been flowing freely for them. Kayla says, “I don’t see anyone else I need to talk to. Do you?”

“Not really.” My stomach growls. “Want to go get cheese fries?”

Her eyes light up. “Yes.” She glances past me for a moment and says, “Someone’s looking your way.”

I turn to find Berch’s gaze on my legs. I bend a knee in a pose that shows off the Louboutins. He grins and looks up to wink at me. I wink back and turn to Kayla before he sees my flush.

She asks, “Should we invite him along?”

I notice Berch is talking to Ergan and remember the crush Kayla had on him all senior year. “Only if we invite Ergan, too.”

Kayla pulls me toward them as she says, “I like how you think.”

When we get there, Ergan’s gaze takes in Kayla, and I nudge her as he says, “Hey, ladies. You’re looking lovely tonight.”

I say, “Thanks. Hey, Kayla and I are thinking about ditching and going to the Diner. Do you guys want to come?”

Berch answers for them. “Great idea.”

He takes my arm and starts to walk before Ergan has a chance to say anything, and I hear Ergan chuckle. I glance back to see him offer his arm to Kayla as he says, “Sure. We’d love to.” Kayla grins at me.

The Diner on the edge of town is a popular spot for Winter Valley High students. It seems ridiculous, but we take four cars to the diner because it’s not on anyone’s way home from the Elks Club. Bright light reflects off the silver aluminum of the building as I pull in beside Berch’s truck. He walks over and opens my door to help me out. The warmth of his hand holding mine travels all the way down to my toes. I’m still trying to come to terms with him being so attentive to my needs.

“I could get used to the charming version of you,” I say.

Berch hasn’t let go of my hand and tugs me closer to tuck my arm in with his. “I’m glad it’s working.” He scans the parking lot as if he’s watching for someone, and a tiny shiver runs through me at the way he seems protective.

Ergan and Kayla were ahead of us, and we all meet by the door of the Diner. Ergan picks a table in the back for us, and the turquoise vinyl seat is slippery as I slide in with Berch right by my side. Kayla is across from me, and she kicks me under the table in a silent squeal. It’s like we’re living out a high school fantasy.

Conversation flows easily as we reminisce about our high school years, and Ergan manages to flirt with Kayla in a way that tells me she might end her night with a date, too. We’re reliving a football story from Ergan when a boisterous group enters the diner. Berch and I have our backs to the entrance, but I don’t need to turn around to know who it is. The loud voice of my high school boyfriend, Parker, is forever ingrained in my memory. And not in a good way.

I hunch down a little in reaction, hoping he won’t see me. Berch places a hand on my thigh, and it offers me a sense of security. I’ve never thought of Berch as my protector, but something about his manner tonight makes me think he knows more about my relationship with Parker than I would like.

Parker was the football star, the guy every girl wanted to date. I thought I had scored big when he asked me out junior year. And for a while, I had; he was sweet and charming. Like most teenaged boys, he was also desperate to lose his virginity. As our relationship progressed, so did the pressure to explore sexual relations. Intimacy with Parker left me wrought with guilt, because whenever he convinced me to go a little further, it was still not enough. The day after we finally went all the way, he dumped me—and spread the rumor it was because I was a terrible lay.

Parker’s voice carries over to us. “Ergan, my man!”

Ergan stands up to greet him, and I paste a smile on my face. Ergan says, “How’s Dallas treating you?”

Parker’s gaze falls on me, and he answers, “Fantastic. Million-dollar house, Porsche, I’m living the dream.”

I’d heard he was a professional football player, and the rumblings of our classmates were wondering if he would show tonight. Berch’s hand tightens on my leg, and I place mine on top of his.

Parker says, “Raven, next time I’m in New York, we should get together.” He winks at me, and I swear Berch lets out a low growl.

A female voice I recognize as one of Parker’s high school groupies calls out, “Parker, we’re hungry over here.”

Parker glances at her and then back to us. He waggles his eyebrows. “Clearly I’m needed. Good to see you all.”

The moment he’s gone, I let myself relax and lean into Berch. Kayla says, “God, he’s still an asshole.”

Ergan says, “You got that right. But at least we won’t have to see him for another five years.”

Berch acts as if nothing has happened and says, “I’m having dessert. Anyone want to join me?”

I smile at him. “Blueberry pie.”

Kayla lets out a sigh. “Cherry for me.”

After we order, I excuse myself to the bathroom. Parker shook me up more than I care to admit, and I need to take a moment to collect myself. The lock on the bathroom door clicks as I slide it, and I turn to the mirror to finger comb my hair and get a grip. It’s not that Parker ruined sex for me, because I had a wonderful college boyfriend who taught me how amazing an intimate relationship could be. No. It’s the way Parker made me feel insignificant, and those emotions came rushing back when he acted as if I would want to be with him again.

The cover to my lipstick snaps off, and I slide a layer on. No matter. Berch Lindholm, the man I’ve wanted all my life, is finally interested. I smile at myself in the mirror before I make my way out of the ladies’ room.