Bent not Broken (246 page)

“So fucking gorgeous,” he muttered, as those hooded, chocolate-brown eyes took me in.

“I need to see you too,” I whispered unabashedly.

Without hesitating, Blaine pulled his shirt off with one arm, revealing the masterpiece that was his torso. If I hadn’t felt the warmth of his skin, I would have sworn it was cut from marble, the smooth hard planes and ridges a true work of art. I ran my fingers over his abs and chest, stopping to caress the small silver hoop in his nipple. He groaned and closed his eyes, motivating me to lift up on my hands and kiss it. I felt Blaine’s body tense and tremble as I licked and sucked gently, careful not to get too eager. Touching him was a practice in restraint because God only knew how badly I wanted to push him down and mount him.

Feeling the excitement growing too thick, Blaine pulled away, sitting on the heels of his bare feet. His gaze was molten as he eyed the scant lace thong covering my sex. When his fingers finally hooked underneath the waistband and pulled them down my legs, we both moaned. I was so ready for him that the throb was painful. The sight of my swollen clit must’ve told him the same.

“God, you’re so beautiful,” he said, before his face disappeared between my thighs.

The first flick of his tongue made me cry out. The second made me scream his name. By the third, I was coming, pulling his already disheveled locks as he continued to devour me. He groaned his appreciation for my taste, sending vibrations through my sensitive flesh up to my belly. By the time he was finally done sliding that magnificent barbell through every delicate fold, I had come again.

As I lay mewling and shaking, Blaine leaned over me to retrieve a condom from the nightstand. We both stared at the foil packet for an awkward beat before our eyes flicked back to one another.

“I’ve never been with anyone without one,” he finally said, a tiny crease settling between his brows.

“Me neither.” I chewed my lip, conjuring up the confidence to ask for what I wanted. And I wanted Blaine. All of him. “I’m on the pill.”

Blaine swallowed before a small smile spread across his full lips. “You sure?”

I knew what he was asking, and I was. I had never been more certain about anything in my life. “Yes.”

He was lowering himself onto my body in the next instant, rejoining our mouths as his hands continuously explored my body. I reached down for the fly of his shorts, desperately needing to feel every part of him, inside and out. Blaine sat up a bit, giving me access to the buttons that sheathed his hardness. And once he was free, my eyes grew wide with delightful shock as I took in the sight of his beauty. Because, dammit, he was beautiful. Every long, hard, swollen inch of him.

He settled between my thighs. “I’ll go slow,” he murmured against my lips as if he could feel my tension. Relief flooded my joints. Blaine was incredibly well-endowed. Hell, he was flat-out big. Bigger than I had ever had.

The tip of him teased my slick entrance, slowly pushing through the barrier of tightness. Even through the slight pinch, I welcomed him inside me, my walls hugging him after adjusting to the intrusion. Blaine pulled out a bit before sliding in deeper, causing me to gasp at the foreign feeling of pure pleasure. I couldn’t focus on my insecurities. Fear was a distant memory. All I could focus on was the man cradling me, kissing me, as he filled me to the brim.

Blaine worked himself into me, stroking me deep and slowly. I caressed his back and shoulders before taking his face in my hands to look at him. His expression was a mixture of strain and ecstasy as I gazed at him though glassy eyes. He felt so…good. So good that he had conjured emotions I had never felt before. Emotions that I wanted to feel everyday from here on out.

I moaned and whispered his name while Blaine echoed my pleasure with sounds of his own. He was vocal as he rocked into me over and over, groaning, telling me I was beautiful, saying how good I felt, even growling as he sped up the tempo and pressure began to build. It was the sexiest thing I had ever experienced, and it heightened my arousal even more.

Tears sprouted at my eyes when the telltale signs of orgasm began to sweep over me, tightening my belly before blooming into an inferno that scorched each nerve ending. I clenched around him, matching the pulsing of his hardness inside me. Blaine shut his eyes tight and hissed as he pounded into me harder, melding pain with the intense pleasure, pushing me into another devastating climax. My back arched off the bed, and Blaine grabbed my hips until only my shoulders and head remained grounded. He surged into me harder and faster still, my garbled screams meeting the sounds of his own building orgasm.

Blaine’s body finally went rigid as he held still inside me. I pulled him down on top of me and wrapped my arms around his neck. I was spent, but I wasn’t ready to let him go. The feel of our wet arousal and sweat was slick between us, but I didn’t care. I wanted him close. I wanted to hold him like he had held me so many times. Like he was holding me now, kissing me, smiling down at me lazily.

“You are amazing. So fucking amazing,” he whispered.

“You’re not so bad yourself,” I grinned.

He nuzzled my neck and nipped my skin, causing me to squeal-moan with him still twitching inside me. I squeezed him tight. I never wanted to let him go.

Just as the glory of afterglow began to sweep over me, my tired eyes ghosted over his shoulder.

The door.

It was closed.

But with Blaine on top of me, kissing my nipples, and working me back into a frenzy, I was too incredibly happy to even be afraid.

Chapter 23

Blaine

“I was seven when my mom and I left.”

At hearing her confession, I reflexively squeezed Kami tighter, her soft, naked body curled around mine while she traced the ink on my torso and arm. I still couldn’t believe she was here. And even more than that, I couldn’t believe she had given herself to me after divulging the horror of her past. Hearing those words, seeing her tears, stirred an insane feeling of desperation inside me that I had never felt before. I was beyond outraged, but my need to comfort her outweighed my need to hunt down the sick fucker who hurt her. I knew at that point that I would do anything for her. I would risk my life to protect her, and give anything to ensure that she never felt that type of pain again.

“My mom is from a very strict, traditional Filipino family. My…father…is American. He was a musician and met her at one of his concerts when she was just a teenager. My mother’s refusal to stop seeing him was a huge show of disrespect, and her parents kicked her out when she was only 16. He took her back to LA with him, and they were married within a year.”

She stopped her account to kiss the inscription on my left pec, conjuring my own demons. But they would have to wait. Kami was the only thing that mattered in that moment.

“I don’t remember when things got bad. I think they were always like that. The lifestyle he led…the drugs, booze, women…my mother had no business being a part of it. Neither did I.”

I kissed the top of her head, encouraging her to continue. Kami turned to look at me, giving me a sad smile that knocked the wind right out of my chest.

“I used to try to rationalize what he did to us. He had a tough upbringing; his dad would kick the shit out of him and rape his little sisters. He was sick. Sick to his core until he finally put a bullet in his brain in front of his wife and kids.” Her green eyes glossed over with fresh tears before she blinked them away and placed her head back on my chest. “I thought it was possible that that sickness could be genetic. Maybe I’d be like them and get sick too. So I figured if I never let anyone in, if I never cared enough to want that for myself, I would be ok.”

“You’re not like them, baby. Not even a little bit,” I said, guiding her head back up by her chin so she could see the conviction in my eyes.

A genuine grin pulled at the corners of her luscious mouth. “I know.” Another soft kiss on my pierced nipple. “But maybe, in ways, I’m worse.”

“How can you say that?”

Kami shrugged before running the very tips of her fingers up and down my stomach. “The way I am. So devastatingly afraid. It goes beyond fear, you know. It’s like my body shuts down completely. I’m not normal. I’ll never be. Which makes it impossible to have a normal relationship.”

“I don’t believe that, Kami. Not for a second.” I brushed the hair away from her face, letting my fingers trail down her spine. “And what relationship is really normal?”

She nodded, and I could almost hear the proverbial “but” on her tongue. “Still…no one deserves to be bogged down with all my baggage. Can you understand why I kept all this from you? It wasn’t just to protect myself, Blaine. It was to protect you too.”

“From what?”

“The end. What always happens when I’ve gotten involved with other guys.”

I let my hands roam the mounds of her ass and down to her thigh, pulling it over mine. “I’m not other guys. I don’t need protection from you, Kami. I want every part of you. Even the parts you think are too painful or ugly to share. I want it all. I want all of
you
.”

She nodded again as she silently contemplated my vehement declaration. Every word I said was steeped in truth. I not only wanted to possess Kami’s demons as if they were my own, I wanted to completely free her from them. I never again wanted fear to consume her, and I would do anything I could to alleviate her anxiety.

“When my mom returned home to her family with me in tow, I thought we were finally safe,” she whispered, returning to the story of her tormented past. “But I was so wrong. So very wrong…”

“Baby…” I kissed the top of her head, a piece of me breaking at the sound of her wavering voice. I knew whatever she needed to say would kill me. Just the thought of her hurting pushed me to the brink of violence. But I quelled my own emotions for her sake. Kami didn’t need my shit piled on top of hers.

“He found us six months later. We were staying with my grandparents up north. And he made it known that we would never be safe. We would never be free of him.”

I felt warm moisture slide onto my chest, heating my body with anger and sympathy. I hated that she had ever shed a tear for that piece of shit. He didn’t deserve them. But I wouldn’t stop her. She needed to let it out, and I was honored to be the one she had opened up to. I was her choice. Kami could have any man she wanted, yet she trusted me with her darkest secrets.

“As soon as he busted down the door, my aunt tried to pull me to the back bedroom to spare me. I kicked and screamed for her to let me go. I knew if someone didn’t help, he would kill her. When I finally wriggled free, I instantly regretted it.”

She took a deep breath, prompting me to stroke her hair. “My grandparents had a wall that was covered with a huge mirror. He…smashed her head into it repeatedly. Over and over again until she was a pile of blood and torn flesh on the floor. Even after he had beaten her unconscious, he just continued to kick her and call her disgusting names. And when his wild eyes flicked up to mine, he just…smiled. He smiled at me as if to say I was next; as if the thought of slicing me up until I was unrecognizable pleased him.”

“Fuck. Oh my God…” I had no words. Nothing could sum up the horror and fury I felt. I just squeezed her tighter. I never wanted to let her go.

Kami sniffled before pressing her lips to my chest. “My mother spent weeks in the hospital. Plastic surgery may have repaired her face, but she was never the same after that. He killed her. Whatever was left of my mother was murdered that day. She never smiled again. She never kissed or hugged me. She never told me she loved me. She just existed. I think a big part of her wished he really did kill her.”

“I’m so sorry, Kam. Shit, I’m…”

“Part of me wished he killed her too,” she whispered through a sob. “I could have mourned her. I would have been given the chance to grieve the loving mother that I once had. Not the empty shell that forgot I existed.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“I was alone with my memories, Blaine. I had no one to help me through them, no one to tell me it would be ok. I had nightmares every night, and no one soothed me. No one told me I had nothing to be afraid of. Fear became all I knew. It was all I had.”

I pulled Kami until she was on top of me, and we were chest to chest. I needed her to see the severity in my face. “Kami, I swear to God that you will never feel that way again. As long as you’ll let me, I will be there to comfort you through every nightmare. To hold and kiss you every day so you never feel lonely again. To dry every last tear.” My thumbs brushed away the ones trickling from her impossibly green eyes. “Fear isn’t all you have. You have me. If you want me, you have me.”

Before she could answer, I covered her mouth with mine and swallowed the last of her sobs. Her hands gripped my hair while mine palmed her ass, slowly grinding her against my hardening cock. Kami placed her knees in either side if my legs, sliding slickness against hardness. I teased her opening with my erection, the friction to her clit causing her to moan and squirm. Fresh wetness covered my stiff length.

“I want you inside me,” she mumbled against my lips. “Now.”

“Yes, ma’am,” I replied, lifting her hips and easing her onto me as I delved into the softest, sweetest place on earth.

****

An hour later, after a shower that nearly led to me thrusting into Kami against the tiled wall, hunger steered us to the kitchen. Kami sat cross-legged on the counter, wearing my t-shirt and boxers. Though the clothes swallowed her petite frame, she looked unbelievably sexy, and it was all I could do to keep from taking her right there.

“How do you like your eggs?” I asked, pulling out a frying pan.

“Isn’t it like 11 at night? A little late for breakfast, don’t ya think?” she asked, stealing a grape from the bowl of freshly cut fruit I had placed in front of her.

“It’s never too late for breakfast. Besides, it’s my favorite meal. And the only one I can cook successfully.”

Kami smiled around a mouthful of plump grape. “So you mean to tell me that you live off of breakfast food alone?”