Authors: Jesse Kimmel-Freeman
Tags: #romance, #vampires, #paranormal, #witches, #werewolves, #crossover, #jesse kimmelfreeman, #bella vampires series
“Dominic, I don't think
you'll understand this, but I love you and I love Michael. Period.
There are two halves to me, pulled against each other in an endless
battle. Part of me is his, just as part of me is yours. I can't
shut one off just to please the other. It wouldn't work, this
is
who I
am
. I need you to understand
this. I've told you everything- just as I always said I would. I
wanted you to know everything before our wedding. I'm not ashamed
of my actions, because they were right for the person I am there.
My blood fasting bound me to him and him to me, that can never be
broken. Understand that as well. I'm here now, I'm here to be with
you. And I'm still willing to bind myself to you as well.” I let my
words fill the air around us, I knew I had not softened anything,
but I was honest.
“How can you just say
that? Do you even realize that makes you out to be whore? Even
worse when you let something like that drink your blood!” His
temper was rising.
“I see, well, since you
feel that way I'll be going to my grandparents. I'll send for my
things in a few days. Thank you for listening patiently.” I rose
and turned away from him- heading to the door.
His hands grabbed my
wrists in tight vice grips. I could see his internal struggle as he
battled whatever was going on inside him. “Emma, please don't go.
It is just hard and a lot to take in.” He sighed and ran his hand
through his hair.
“I realize that, Dom. I
felt I needed to tell you. A full disclosure kind of thing. I
didn't want you to marry me under false ideals. I am what I am. You
can call me all the foul names you can think of but it will not
change how I feel or the role I will play in saving our people. I
love you, Dominic DeDominico, but I will not rip one part of me
away that is just as important to this battle because you don't
like it.” My back was straight and I stood tall as I told him I
wouldn't choose.
“What the hell am I
supposed to say, Em? I mean, seriously, you tell me that you
basically married Michael, slept with him, drank his blood, let him
drink your blood, and that you love him... but that you love me
too? How does that even make sense?” His hands tightened around my
wrists.
“You didn't ask me to
make sense, and I didn't say it would be as straightforward as most
things. I merely told you I was going to be honest with you.” I
pulled my arms back- breaking his fierce grip- and stepped out into
the hall.
“Look, don't go. We can
work this out.” He took a few deep breaths.
“Dom, I've worked out
my side. My guilt left me when I realized I couldn't try to be
something false for the prophecy to succeed. I needed to embrace
both sides of who I am. Yes, I've hurt you, I didn't want to, but
it couldn't be spared. I'm sorry you're hurt. And more importantly,
that I'm not the person you want me to be. But I can't be someone
I'm not, and I can't change the past- nor would I want to for
this.” I walked to the stairs and grabbed my bags.
“Please stay. I need a
drink or something. Give me some time to think, Em. I need to clear
my thoughts. I knew it would be something I wouldn't like, but I
didn't expect this or so much. Please?” His anger had burned out,
it was replaced by fear- fear that I would leave him and return to
Ireland for good.
“I'll stay then. But
I'm going up to my room. Take all the time you need, and if you
want to talk you know where to find me.” I turned and climbed the
stairs.
I threw my bags on the
floor, grabbed out some sweats from my closet and went to my
beautiful bathroom. The water poured down on me just as my tears
broke free. I knew he wouldn't take it well, but I had hoped that
things would've gone more smoothly. I hugged myself as my body was
wrecked with sobs.
How could I've
been so stupid? What was I thinking?
I shook my head at myself. I let the water wash away all my
tears and calm me. I knew tomorrow I would be back at school. I
started earlier than most because of the screening I would be
starting the day with. I pulled myself out of the shower and slowly
toweled off. My sweats were comforting and familiar. When I put
them on it was like pulling a security blanket on. I sighed again
and headed back into my room- Dom was sitting on the
bed.
He held up his hand in
surrender. “Look, I'm sorry. I didn't handle that well. I realize
that must have been hard for you to tell me. But it still hurts,
Emma. I don't like the idea of sharing you with a werewolf. I
really don't understand exactly what has happened between you two,
part of me really does not want to. But I figure that is something
we can discuss at a later time. You shouldn't have been so
reckless- what if the stories about werewolf blood were true? You
would've died, regardless of your healing abilities. I would have
lost you, completely.” His eyes were tinged with
tears.
“I understand your
reaction, you don't have to be sorry. I'm sure I would've been
worse if you had told me something like that. I'm sorry that I
couldn't think of a better way of talking about this. I figured
that telling you in one go and bluntly would make it over quicker-
thus making it hurt less. And just so you know, yes, I did think of
the consequences to my actions- but I knew, deep down, that I was
making the right choices.” I went and sat next to
him.
“Will it always be like
this?” I could see his mind trying to accept
things.
“For as long as
necessary, yes, it'll. If you can't accept that, I'll and do
understand, Dom. It is a lot to ask of anyone. I know this better
than most would. Remember, what I've done to you, I've also done to
him and he has done to me. It is a bitter place we're stuck in, but
it's what's necessary. It is something that is accepted or
rejected- I accepted my fate as I knew rejection would only hurt my
people.” I took his hand.
“Emma, I accept you. I
accept that you're torn between two worlds, and two parts of
yourself. I also realize that you can't choose between us even if
you wanted to- it's not how our cards have been played. But I can
honestly tell you, that I'll never do this to you. You should
always know that. I can be your rock in all this chaos.” His smile
was tentative but warm- the hurt was still there, but it was slowly
retreating to the dark corners of his mind.
“Thank you, Dominic. I
really do love you, you know.” I kissed his cheek.
“As I you, and I always
will.” He pulled my lips to his into a deep kiss.
I breathed in his scent
and realized that he was as much a part of me as Mike, and that I
could never lose one without it breaking a part of me. It was a
harsh realization, but something else that I needed to know about
myself.
“Now, you sleep. You
will need your rest for tomorrow.” He smiled at me.
“Stay. Please. I don't
want the night terrors to come. Not tonight.” I knew if he left my
mind would pull me into the dark void of how things could turn out
very poorly from here on; I didn't want to have to deal with it,
not tonight.
“As you wish.” He
pulled down the blanket and ushered me into the bed and then he
laid down next to me holding me ever so delicately.
“Thank you, Dominic.
Night.” I curled against him and felt some of the stress that had
taken root in my very soul leave my body and drifted off to
sleep.
Morning came too soon.
I hadn't set my alarm, but Dom woke me. I rolled back over and
grumbled at him.
“Uh-huh. Your butt is
getting out of that bed, Emma Mary Hutchinson. Or I'm going to drag
you from it.” Something in his voice caused me to look up at
him.
“Excuse me, caveman.
But civilized people don't drag their beloved from their nice warm
beds so early in the damn morning!” I chucked a pillow at him and
hit him square in the head.
“Oh yeah?” He grabbed
my ankle.
“You wouldn't?” My eyes
slitted at him.
“I wouldn't?” The
challenge had been accepted and he pulled- not hard enough to pull
me out all the way but my leg was off the bed up to my
knee.
“You beast! Let go!” I
laughed as I flailed my legs about and grabbed hold of the
mattress.
“Nope. You're getting
out of that bed.” He laughed and pulled again, and I lost my grip,
sliding so my butt now rested on the edge of the
bed.
“Dominic, if you pull
one more time I'm so going to whomp you from here to China!” I
snarled at him as I tried to sit up.
“I always wanted to see
the Great Wall with you.” His laughter burst from him and he pulled
one last time and I went tumbling from the bed; I would've landed
right on the floor if he hadn't caught me.
“Oh, you're soooo lucky
you caught me.” I pulled him into a kiss.
“Apparently, I'm.” His
eyes smiled down at me, and I was thankful that he had let
something go.
“Put me down so I can
get ready and get the devil out of here.” I
mumbled.
“Hmm, that isn't a very
good attitude to have for your first day.” He nuzzled into my
hair.
“Mmm.” My mind felt
fuzzy warm.
“We could see about
waking you up more.” There was a sly glint to his
eyes.
All of sudden pain
flashed through my body. “Oh my GOD!” I clutched my
face.
“What's wrong?” He
stopped playing and set me down on the bed.
“I don't know. Is... is
there something on my face?” I winced as I pulled my hand
away.
“Emma, I don't know if
you're gonna believe me, but you have a flaming red hand print on
your face, um, even a little claw mark that is starting to bleed. I
don't understand.” He gulped.
“I think I do. Can you
get me an ice pack and the first aid kit?” I asked.
“Yeah, I'll be right
back.” He looked back one more time and then rushed out of the
room.
“Damn, Acacia.” I went
straight to our link and I knew Mike had told her.
Hey, you
okay?
I didn't know if I should
tell him about my matching mark.
I've been better, but
hey, I told her. Are you okay? I felt you last night, I knew you
told him.
His words were
soothing.
Yeah, I'm fine. Dom
didn't react quite as strongly as she did. I've got something to
tell you.
I decided he should
know that we had a physical bond as well.
I'm
listening.
Concern colored his
words.
It's about our
connection, we, eh, share more than mind and spirit. We share a
physical bond as well. When she slapped you, she slapped me too.
I've got a nice little mark to prove it.
I tried to sound like it didn't
matter.
What?! Oh, shit, Em. I
didn't know. Is that all you got?
Mike seemed worried.
Well, I haven't been in
front of a mirror or anything, but that was all I felt. I just got
up. Why? What else did she do?
I
suddenly was worried for his well-being.
Oh, her temper is, eh,
pretty snarly. I have a black eye, the slap print, and an almost
dislocated shoulder.
He listed
his injuries like they didn't matter.
Hmm, maybe we're only
physically linked when we're awake? I just don't know. Are you
okay? Do you want me to call Moira so you can stay
there?
I wasn't sure I liked the
idea of him staying around her.
Yeah, I'm fine. I don't
want my kind walking about over there. She's calmed down a bit. I'm
giving her more time before I try to talk to her again.
He sighed.
Yeah, probably for the
best.
I laughed.
I've got to go get ready, first day as a
screener. Let me know if you need anything. I love
you.
Love you too, and don't
worry I'll be fine.
Good luck today. I
know you'll do awesome.
He sent
me warm thoughts.
Thanks,
bye.
I let the link
fade.
Dom walked in the room
holding an ice pack and the first aid kit. I took the ice pack and
placed it to my cheek.
“Okay, I understand the
ice pack, but why the first aid kit when you can heal the wound
away? And are you going to explain this to me?” His curiosity
colored his concern.
“Well, the ice pack is
to numb it before I start trying to heal myself first thing in the
morning. The first aid kit's for just in case. And this is a result
of the bond I share with Mike. He, um, told Acacia this morning.
She didn't take things quite as well as you did. But I only got the
tail end of it.” I held the pack gently to my cheek as the ice
froze the swelling.