Begin Again (11 page)

She shook her head. “It is not important to
me.”

He kissed her cheek. “That makes how you look even more special.”

They rode to the play in his town car—with a driver! At the theater, their seats were in draped boxes along the side wall. Donuta enjoyed the story about a working-class woman trying to make it on Broadway. A famous movie actor starred as the father, though she didn’t know him because she rarely went to films. The party
afterward was held in the penthouse of one of the patrons.

Dazzled by the glitter and glamour of the guests mingling in the huge space, Donuta accepted a glass of champagne from the waiter, then turned to search for Gerald. Instead, her eye caught on someone familiar. It took her a moment to realize it was Adam Armstrong. The man who was sweeping Paulina off her feet.

“Where’s
Matka
?” Ben asked. “I’m hungry. “She said she’d fix me pancakes today before church.”

Nia sighed. “We overslept and missed church. And
Matka
had…plans last night so she stayed with Aunt Magdalena.”

“Plans like Mommy did last night?”

Paulina was sure she’d blushed to the roots of her hair. But she thought,
I hope so
. She hadn’t told Nia what had happened between her and Adam.
She grinned, though, at the thought of what they’d done together.

“
Matka
will be home sometime today,” Nia told Paulina’s son.

“I wanna ride my bike.” This from Tommy, who glanced at his shy cousin, sitting by the window at a small table Nia had bought him, with some new art supplies. “Sal, wanna come?”

Salvador looked up. “Can’t I stay here and paint?”

“You could,” Nia said. “But
it’s a sunny day, and I’d like you to get some fresh air.”

“Okay.” Sometimes the kid just gave in too easily. But he was a lot like his mother and his father. Peter had been as easygoing as they come.

They got the kids fed, clothed and into sneakers, then headed outside. Their neighborhood had sidewalks, and appeared safe, but after the accident that had robbed them of husbands and fathers,
both Nia and Paulina wouldn’t let the boys go out of the yard alone like many of their friends did. And when any of the kids went to playdates, they either drove them or walked them over. Idly, Paulina wondered if they’d ever be less protective, if the cloud of impending doom would ever go away.

With the boys riding ahead, Nia spoke first. “You haven’t said anything about Friday night. I wasn’t
going to push, but since Tommy brought it up…”

In truth, Paulina was afraid to share the wonderful night with her sister because she didn’t want Nia to put a damper on it. “I had a good time.”

“Will you see him again?”

“I think so. We’re both busy. We’re going to text his week to see if we can get together.” Actually, he’d texted her a couple of times last night and sounded…nostalgic.

“Dating him is fine, I think, just so…” Nia trailed off and tugged her sweater around her tighter.

“Just so…?”

Nia took Paulina’s hand. “…you aren’t serious about him. I know we have to move on, but I always thought we’d find guys like Peter and Donnie.”

“Yeah, I did, too.” But Adam had crashed into her life like a meteor, and the relationship had taken a fast turn into intimacy.
If she closed her eyes, she could still recall his scent, still feel the way he’d touched her, caressed her, kissed her. And more. The sensations were so acute, so pleasurable, so healthy, she couldn’t regret what she’d done with him.

He’d walked her to the door at two in the morning…

“So, Ms. Paulina Pettrone. Did I knock your socks off like you did mine?”

“Uh-huh.” She stared up
at him. “It was wonderful, Adam, so wonderful.”

“God, don’t purr like that. You’ve worn me out but I could still
—
”

She put her hand on his mouth. “Kiss me good night.”

He did. Lifting her off the ground again. (Why was that so sexy?) Devouring her mouth till she was breathing hard. (God that felt good.) “I have to see you, soon,” he said when he released her.

“Nia,
Matka
and I
coordinate our schedules on Sunday. I’ll let you know when I can get free.”

“Do you want to see me as badly?”

“I do.”

A last peck on the cheek. “Make it soon, woman.”

She wiggled her brows. “I’ll make sure we have condoms, too.”

He’d stalked away, mumbling under his breath about sirens, Lolita and femme fatales…

“You went quiet,” her sister said. “Did I overstep with my
comment on Adam?”

“What? No. I realize Adam couldn’t be more different from Donnie.”

More silence. “Do you even like all that stuff? A driver? His fancy clothes and haircut that could fund our church’s food cupboard for a week.”

“I don’t hold it against him, if that’s what you mean.”

“I would have trouble with relating to his world.”

She’d related to his world last night, and
he’d tilted hers on its axis. “It’s too soon to judge, Nia. Maybe it’ll get to be too much for me, but maybe not. We’ve only had a couple dates.”

“Yeah, I guess. Now let’s talk about
Matka
. Do you think she spent the night with Gerald in the city and lied about staying at Magdalena’s?”

“I have no idea. But don’t tease her if she did.”

“I won’t. I want her to be happy.”

Briefly,
Paulina wondered why that same sentiment didn’t apply to her and Adam. Gerald was from the same world as Adam. But she dismissed the comparison. She was right when she said that it was too soon to be serious or not serious about the man. So she didn’t let Nia’s reaction ruin what had happened with him under the stars.

They fixed the kids dinner, then talked about their weekly schedules, even
though
Matka
wasn’t here. Nia said, “Did you see the Wednesday-night soccer practice has been called off because the field is being used for a special event?”

“Um, no. I didn’t.” She studied her sister. “Do you want to go out? You watched the kids for me Friday.”

“Where would I go?”

“Hmm, a movie by yourself. To a spa. Take some alone time, sweetie. Or you could call another one of
our sisters to go with you.”

“I don’t need that, Paulie.”

“Then, could I have Wednesday night to see Adam?”

“Yeah, sure.” Nia’s love shone in her eyes. “And you don’t have to be afraid to ask me for time with him. It’s okay, Paulie. Do what you want. Just be careful.”

Well, she’d said she’d bring condoms.

Since
Matka
hadn’t come home yet from New York, Nia
went to the meeting at school alone and Paulina stayed with the kids. Besides, her sister really hated these things, but Nia enjoyed the plans they made. Since the PTA met each month on a different night to accommodate everyone, some meetings like this one were on weekends.

Once inside the gym area where seats had been set up, she listened with half an ear to the budget reports, the old business,
thinking mostly about how Paulina was changing, expanding and Nia was stuck. Totally and completely stuck. The notion disconcerted her.

“The first item of new business is next year’s artist in residence. We’ve got two people who said they would be interested in coming.” The vice president of the group handed out a packet and Nia opened hers. “Alana Morgan is one. She paints portraits, more
in the classical style.”

A few of her paintings were included in the packet. Though Nia could appreciate the craftsmanship, she didn’t get excited about the work. Probably because it left her cold, and she believed art should stir the emotions.

“The second is Rafael Castle.”

Nia turned the page. Wow! His stuff was different, very different, but it buzzed with energy. The sky, in a
variety of colors, came alive.

“Opinions?” the president asked.

Nia stood. “I like the second style. It’s got energy and substance but doesn’t tell you what to think about the subject. I think the kids will be drawn to it, as I am.”

The discussion began. A few preferred the representational art, but more agreed with Nia. By the end of the night, they’d chosen their artist.

Nia
left the meeting, feeling better than when she’d come. She might not have a man in her life, might not be moving on, but at least she could contribute to Sal’s education in a meaningful way.

She hoped he liked Rafe Castle.

After Nia left, and the boys were playing in their rooms, Paulina went upstairs to email Adam. She called up her messages. There was one from him.
Let me know tonight when we can see each other… Come on, girl. Give me a time…
It had been written at four this afternoon. Thinking how good being pursued felt, Paulina giggled out loud and had started to return his email when one came in from Magdalena. Her sister’s missive read,
Click on this link. It’s a page from last night. See
Matka
at her finest. Oh, and there’s someone else you know there.

Intrigued, Paulina hit the link.
Gala for the Glitterati of Broadway.

Matka
went to a gala? Apparently. It was held at a penthouse in Manhattan. After a new Broadway play. She scanned the photos and came upon one of her mother and Gerald. Holy hell!

Matka
looked gorgeous. A caption read
Gerald Callahan and his friend, unidentified
.

She scanned the other photos, and when she didn’t
find another of
Matka
in the batch, she was about to click off when her eye caught on someone. She enlarged the photo.

It was Adam, in a stunning tuxedo with a blue-and-green tie that highlighted his eyes. On his arm was a slender brunette wearing diamonds at her ears and throat. Beneath the photo the caption read,
A candid of Architect of the Year, Adam Armstrong, with the longtime companion,
Elyssa Hargrove.

Paulina zeroed in on the flute of champagne in Ms. Hargrove’s hand. She recalled drinking beer from a bottle Friday night. Then another thought came to her. She checked her phone messages just to be sure. Seriously? Adam had texted her last night—twice—when he was on a date with his socialite girlfriend?

On Sunday night, Adam was in a rotten mood. First,
he’d hurt someone he liked, cared about…

After the party, Joe had swerved the car in front of Elyssa’s home on the Upper East Side. The glass was in place between the front and back seats, and Elyssa leaned over and pressed her breast against his arm. “Tell Joe to come back, darling.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t.” He’d moved away from her. “I’d like to take a break from our relationship, Elyssa.”

She angled her head and her jaw dropped open. “It’s been a while since we’ve…been together. I wondered about your reticence to make love. Does your request have something to do with that?”

He hadn’t pieced it together before this. They hadn’t made love since he’d met Paulina. “In a way.” He was hedging but he couldn’t very well tell her that he’d had hot sex with another woman, who’d jumbled
his brains. “It’s for personal reasons.”

“That’s ominous. You could at least give me more information on this sudden decision.”

“I prefer to leave it at that.” He’d accompanied her to the door, then went back into the car, refusing to think about what his actions meant…

Now he was prowling around in his house, unable to figure out why Paulina hadn’t been in contact. He walked to the
window and let the evening air cool him off some. Sure, she had a busy life, but he’d sent three texts and an email. Damn it. He couldn’t remember a time when he’d waited to hear from a woman
.

Once again, he checked his phone and paced again, from his living room to the kitchen to his den, where he dropped down at his desk. Hell. He punched in her number. Waited some more. “Paulina Pettrone.
Leave a message.”

Shit. He was behaving like a teenager and he didn’t like it one bit
.

She always slept like the dead. Donnie used to tease her that their kids would have starved to death as infants if he hadn’t gotten up to tend to them. But all night, she watched the red numbers on the clock go from ten to eleven to midnight. Hell, she had a big day tomorrow, a big week,
really. They were hoping to get halfway through the framing of the music hall. That would be huge progress.

Turning over, she stared at the ceiling. And admitted what was wrong. Adam had had a date with another woman. And he was probably sleeping with the
longtime companion
. At first, she’d told herself they weren’t exclusive, so his relationship with someone else shouldn’t matter. But as
the hours drifted by, she admitted to herself it did. She wasn’t serious about him and didn’t feel bad about having recreational sex with him. But she also wasn’t sophisticated enough to sleep with someone who had bed partners other than her at the same time
.

She punched her pillow and lay back down on it. She wouldn’t see him anymore. Simple as that. Paulina’s heart vised in her chest. But
she was right to do this. Especially now, when she hadn’t come to care about him yet
.

Closing her eyes again, she waited for sleep to come.

Rain came the next morning, so plans for the framing were put on hold. Usually, Paulina went into work anyway, did office stuff with Nia, but today, she dressed in nice jeans, sandals and a plain white blouse, left a note for her sister she’d be late for work and headed into the city by the subway. Adam had called her last night, but she’d turned her phone
off. Today, she’d tell him in person what decision she’d made and be done with him. Sad, she nonetheless knew this was the right thing to do. And in some ways, it was a relief. She wouldn’t have to worry about their differences; she wouldn’t have to think about introducing him to her kids.

But she also would never feel his kiss, his arms clutching her to him again. Her throat clogged at the
thought.

When she arrived at his office, the building looked tall and glitzy, unlike the first time she’d come here and admired its architecture. Knowing that impression had some significance, she took the elevator to the top floor. His assistant was at her desk.