Before You Leave: A Romance Novel (8 page)

The day is turning into a better day. The tour bus that we are on is half full of senior citizens who are the funniest I have heard for a long time. They are making us feel a part of their little group and have so far got us to sing with them for the whole thirty-minute journey. I have tried to stop feeling guilty about smiling. It tries to creep in but no sooner has it arrived someone in the group has pulled me over to look at another piece of rock near to where we are walking. At the end of the tour, we are pulled into their group photo; even Abigail joined in and smiled. I haven’t managed to talk to her yet, hopefully later we can sit down and work out what the friction between us is about and clear the air for Sarah’s sake.

When the coach stops back into the town and we start to disperse, one of the ladies who has been showing me the rocks, pulls me over to the side, out of earshot from the others.

“Sweetie I want to give this to you.” With her fist closed she uses her other hand to turn my palm facing upwards, placing the cold object in the centre, closing my palm around it. “When you feel sad, those moments during the day that you want to disappear then hold on to it. Let it take your pain away.”

I open my hand to see a small stone that is smooth to the touch; its tranquil colours of blues and greens are sea like.

“Oh thank you, but I don’t need a pebble.”

“I have been around a long time young lady. You need that healing stone.”

“I’m okay, I don’t think I need healing, thank you.” I say leaning down for her to hear my whispers.

“I have eyes and can see the way you stare into the distance when you think no one is looking. Now put it in your pocket and when you need it just transfer all that hurt and pain by rubbing your fingers across it. It worked for me.”

“Is that why there are grooves on it?” I ask, trying to avoid the reason she thinks I may want it.

“Certainly is. Now quick, before that other one over there wants one.”

I quickly slip it in to my shorts pocket just as Abigail walks past. The lady winks at me and joins the others in her group.

“Are you ready to head back to the apartment, or shall we go for food?” Sarah asks practically skipping over to me.

“It’s nearly seven, should we shower first before going to the nearest eatery?” I answer her directly.

“Good thinking on the shower first idea. It’s been such a good day, let’s get dressed up and go out for the evening.” Sarah says and links arms with Abigail and I.

Rubbing the pebble in my pocket I smile and agree.

****

I am grateful the place we decide on is an Irish bar. I have a feeling that we wouldn’t be running into Kieran here simply because he was more local than a tourist. These themed pubs are more for the likes of the homesick tourist looking for some home comforts.

The pub doesn’t disappoint. The posters on the wall for the night’s entertainment are for karaoke. I have to laugh when I read it. It’s been a while since I had a mike in my hand, attempting to sing along with the words on a scrolling screen. So much has happened since then. The old themed place looks like it’s stuck in the 1980’s and I love the relaxed atmosphere. It reminds me of my grandparent’s house and the way the family gathered around the fire during the summer as well as the winter. Here there is no fire but the chairs are just as old. Sarah gets in the first round of drinks and we find a table for four to read the menus the barman handed to us.

“Are you sure you want to eat here?” Abigail asks, reading down the list.

“What’s wrong with here? Sarah chips in.

“Look at the menu. I could make better than this at home.”

“Well I would love a bit of fish and chips. No fish for you though Jules.” Sarah pipes up and winks.

“I never want to eat another fish, ever.” Emphasising on the ‘ever’.

“What are you talking about?” Abigail asks not knowing what happened that night.

“Oh nothing.” Sarah answers and looks at me with a
forget it
smile.

“Well are we staying or going, after this drink?” Abigail asks.

“Staying. I like it here. What do you think Jules?”

“I’m happy to stay here too.” I agree with Sarah, much to Abigail’s distaste.

“Right, sorted. Drink up ladies, we have some singing to do.” And while I hold on tight to the stone in my pocket, I laugh along with her.

*****

The food is homemade and delicious. The burger I ate was bigger than the plate and much more pleasing to my stomach than the paella I had two nights previously. I could hardly start the chips that were included and instead just ate the salad. Sarah moaned throughout her meal, letting us all know exactly how much she was enjoying it and as for Abigail, well she just picked at the lasagne hardly touching it.

“Jules, are you going to give us a bit of a song later, I know how much you love singing.” Sarah asks me when it’s Abigail’s turn to buy the round of drinks.

“I don’t know. You know I haven’t done that for a while.”

Sarah reaches over and takes my hand from across the table; our plates had been cleared a while ago.

“Remember that night you and Ryan first met in that bar?”

“Of course, it is etched in my memory forever.”

“You were singing that song, what was it called again?”

“Where are you going with this Sarah?”

“You loved singing, Ryan fell in love with you that night just listening to your voice.”

“It was Drive by The Cars, one of my favourite songs.”

“And who drove you home afterwards?”

I smile at the memory that seems so long ago from a different life.

“You know he arrived to that pub with Abigail.”

“What do you mean with Abigail?” In all the times Ryan and I recalled how we met, not once did he tell me that missing piece of information.

“He arrived with her that night. I had to drive her home and of course she moaned all the way about the cheek of him leaving with you.”

“Oh I didn’t know that. I guess when you’re in business with someone you are bound to be going out in the evenings too.”

“I guess so sweetie. But just remember, your voice was given to you for a reason. Use it.”

“I had better get some more drink in after Abigail returns, I think I’ll need it!”

“Good girl, this is your restart, ok?”

I nod just as Abigail reaches our table with three full glasses.

****

The karaoke starts off slow, only the tall barman has had the mike and sings terribly out of tune, but it’s fun to watch. With a few more drinks in me, I start to melt into the chair, turning it away from the table to face the room. Modern songs are being sung but it is the Neil Diamond tunes that get the room buzzing. In the brief moments I think about Ryan and how much he would enjoy being here, I close my eyes and hold tight to the pebble and its smooth surface, I put into my maxi dress pocket.

The bar begins to fill and the place becomes much louder. I watch as Sarah pushes her way through the throes of people gathered around the karaoke desk and leans in to talk to the man who seems to be in charge. My stomach does a flip. Something tells me it is time to leave, with or without the girls. I’ve known Sarah long enough to know what she is playing at.

Standing up from my seat, my legs feel a little unsteady. I hold onto the table briefly until I get the feelings back into my step and begin to head to the door. Not an easy task with the room busier than when we arrived. Just as my hand pushes the door open, the music starts up again. I recognise the tune straight away and take a deep breath in.

From behind I am pulled to the centre of the room and before I know what is happening a ring is formed around me. Sarah pushes the mike in my hand and joins people I don’t know in the circle. They all start swaying to the music as the intro is restarted. Startled and feeling sick at the thought of having to do this, I stand completely still. The crowd around start singing the first line as the song begins but I am frozen. I can see Sarah watching, willing me with her expressions to start singing but I can’t. I just can’t.

Then the crowd starts moving allowing someone else into the circle singing the missed words that are stuck in my throat.

Walking towards me, Kieran continues singing with his deep tones perfectly in tune. Just hearing him sing is making me feel less in the spotlight. It is crazy but I missed seeing him today. I missed his presence.

He takes my hand and I forget I am here, in this room, for that moment. Lifting the microphone up, I finish the song with him. Looking only at Kieran as our last notes ring out. The crowd starts applauding, loudly and without thinking I fall into Kieran’s open arms as he pulls me in for a hug. The place starts shouting for more but it is Kieran that speaks for the two of us, telling them next time they would have to pay. A few laugh and disperse, leaving us amongst the crowd. Kieran guides me over towards the back of the room, to a quieter spot. Feeling a little embarrassed for my lack of restraint, I take my hand out of his and hand back the microphone.

“Thank you. I was put on the spot back there.”

“Hey, you were amazing but I think one song was more than enough. The guys in this place will just keep playing more for you to sing to bring in the crowd. So would you like me too?” Kieran asks, his eyes sparkling from the overhead light. A bead of sweat trickles down the side of his forehead and he wipes it away with the back of his hand. Tonight is the first time I’ve seen him in a casual pair of dark jeans, the shirt he wears is unbuttoned near the top and light sprinkling of chest hair peeks through. I swallow nothing in my dry throat needing to steer my focus back to the man that has been stalking me.

“Like you to what?” I ask confused with the question.

“Drive you home.”

“You know our apartment isn’t far from here. I can walk, thank you.”

“But you’ve been drinking, your cheeks are ruby red. I don’t want you to fall. Plus I want to show you something.”

“I don’t think that would be a good idea, do you? Plus I came with my friends. I can’t just walk away.”

“I promise I will have you back by midnight.”

“Look Kieran, something is not adding up here. Sarah told me that it was you that helped me off the plane. She also told me that you were acting all hero like. Sarah is important to me. I wouldn’t be here without her and she is unsure of you and your intensions. I have no idea what you are playing at.”

“Oh, really? I promise you I am not a weirdo, I can explain.”

“I don’t want to listen. Thank you for helping out just then, but please, stay away from me.” I start to walk away from him. I just don’t want to cope with confusion right now, but he holds onto my hand stopping me.

“Please let me explain, Julia.” Even the way he says my name causes the butterflies to jump in my stomach. I don’t know why it responds that way when he is near.

“No, now please, let me go.” I demand without looking at him.

“You heard what she said, come on Jules. It’s time to leave.” Sarah interrupts and shoots him a fierce look warning him to back off.

Holding my hand, Sarah guides me back to our table and tells Abigail that we’re leaving, much to her delight. 

Our walk back, although unsteady, is quiet. My energy sapped out of me from the day’s events and the evening’s drama. Sarah and Abigail disappear into their rooms as soon as we arrive in the apartment, while I make up my bed and crawl into it. I try to sleep but my mind keeps going back to Kieran and the way he looked when Sarah told him we were leaving. But she was right. Who knows what his intentions would be if I went with him. And why me? The island is full of women that are looking for some fun. I am sure he is thinking right now why too and probably moved onto another lost soul in the bar as soon as we left. What was he doing there anyway? That was one place I thought he wouldn’t be.

Throwing off the sheet that has wrapped around my legs, the heat even at this time of the night is still sticky and hot. I reach over and take the little pebble out of my pocket of my dress that I left on the floor. Rubbing my thumb into the grooves until I fall asleep and dream of a man walking towards me, singing a lullaby with his hands out wide waiting for me to run into them.