Beautiful Redemption (7 page)

“I am capable of handling Sawyer, sir.”

“The moment,” he seethed, “he makes a snide remark, questions your authority, or makes a pass at you, you come straight to my office.”

Makes a pass at me? Who does he think he’s fooling?
“Why did you assign him to this case if you dislike him so much?”

“He’s good at what he does.”

“Yet you don’t listen to him.”

He rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger, frustrated. “Just because I have to put up with his bullshit to use his talent doesn’t mean you have to.”

“Do I seem weak to you?”

His brows pulled in. “Pardon?”

“Are you trying to undermine me?” I sat up. “Is that what your game is? I’ve been trying to figure all of this out. I guess it would look much better to make me seem whiny and incompetent than for you to just run me out on the rails.”

“What? No,” he said, looking genuinely confused.

“I can handle Sawyer. I can handle my newly appointed position. I am capable of running this squad. Is there anything else, sir?”

Maddox realized his mouth was hanging open, and he snapped it shut. “That will be all, Agent Lindy.”

“Fantastic. I have work to do.”

Maddox opened the door, slipped both of his hands into his pants pockets, nodded, and then left, walking toward the security door. I looked up at the clock and knew exactly where he was headed.

Val scampered in, eyes wide. “Holy shit, what was that?”

“I have no idea, but I’m going to find out.”

“He was in a hurry to leave the pub last night. Did he walk you home?”

“No,” I said, standing up.

“Lie.”

I ignored her. “I need to burn off some steam. Care to join me?”

“The fitness room during the ASAC’s time? Hell no. You shouldn’t push him, Liis. I get that you two have some weird competition going on, but he is famous for his temper.”

I picked up my gym bag off the floor and jerked it over my shoulder. “If he wants me to push back, I’ll push.”

“To where? Over the edge?”

I thought about that for a moment. “He just came in here all pissy about Sawyer.”

Val shrugged. “Sawyer is a jackass. He makes everyone pissy.”

“No, I got the distinct feeling Maddox was…I realize how this sounds, but he was behaving like a jealous ex-boyfriend. If that’s not it, then I think he gave me this promotion to make me look incompetent. It falls in line with what you’ve said about him before and what he did to me before I got the promotion.”

Val reached into her pocket and opened a small bag of pretzels. She held one to her mouth and chewed on it in small bites like a chipmunk. “I’m leaning more toward your theory that Maddox is jealous, but that’s impossible. First of all, he would never be jealous of Sawyer.” Her face twisted. “Second, he just isn’t wired that way anymore, not since that girl made him hate anything with a vagina.”

I wanted to remind her that he hadn’t slept with anyone before me either, but that would imply that I wanted him to be jealous, and I didn’t. “What makes you think it was her fault?” I asked.

That made her pause. “He was in love with that girl. Have you been in his office?”

I shook my head.

“Those empty shelves used to hold several frames with pictures of her. Everyone knew how much he struggled to do the job and love her the way he thought she deserved. Now, no one talks about it—not because he did something wrong, but because she broke his heart, and no one wants to make him more miserable than he already is.”

I ignored her. “I’m an intelligence analyst, Val. It’s in my nature to piece together bits of information and form a theory.”

Her nose wrinkled. “What does that have to do with anything? I’m trying to argue the point that he’s not jealous of Sawyer.”

“I never said he was.”

“But you want him to be.” Val was confident she was right. It was maddening.

“I want to know if I’m right about him. I want to know if he’s trying to sink me. I want to peel back that top layer and see what’s underneath.”

“Nothing you’ll like.”

“We’ll see,” I said, walking past her toward the door.

M
ADDOX STOPPED MIDWAY
in an inverted sit-up and sighed. “You’re joking.”

“Nope,” I said, heading straight for the women’s locker room.

He let his back fall flat against the bench he was sitting on, his legs bent and his feet firmly planted on the floor. “Do you want us to hate each other?” he said, looking at the ceiling. “I’m getting the feeling that you do.”

“You’re not far off,” I said, pushing through the swinging door.

After removing my workout clothes from my small duffel bag, I shimmied my navy pencil skirt over my hips and unbuttoned my light-blue blouse, and then I switched out my C-cup for a sports bra. It was amazing how one piece of fabric could take me from modest curves to the build of a twelve-year-old boy.

The room lined with lockers and motivational posters didn’t smell like the mildew and dirty sneakers I’d expected. Bleach and fresh paint dominated the air.

Maddox was finishing his sit-ups while I made my way to the closest treadmill, my Adidas making squish noises as each foot pressed and lifted from the rubber floor. I stepped up onto the belt of the machine and threaded the bottom of my white FBI T-shirt through the safety clasp.

“Why now?” he said from across the room. “Why do you have to be here during my lunch hour? You can’t work out in the mornings or the evenings?”

“Have you seen this room before and after hours? The equipment is full. The best time of day to get a full workout without dodging sweaty bodies is at your lunch hour because no one wants to come in here while you’re here.”

“Because I don’t let them.”

“Are you going to ask me to leave?” I asked, looking at him over my shoulder.

“You mean, tell you to leave?”

I shrugged. “Semantics.”

His eyes poured over my tight leggings as he thought about that, and then he left the bench for the double bars before lifting both of his legs nearly chest-high. If he worked out like that five times a week, it was no wonder he had an eight-pack. Sweat was dripping from his hair, and his entire torso glistened.

I pretended not to notice as I pressed the button to start the treadmill. The belt moved smoothly forward, the gears causing a familiar shudder beneath my feet. Placing earbuds in my ears, I used the music to help me forget that Maddox was behind me, perfecting perfection, and increasing the speed and incline of the treadmill helped, too.

After a few laps, I pulled one earbud out and let it hang down over my shoulder. I turned to look at the wall of mirrors on my left and spoke to Maddox’s reflection, “By the way, I’m onto you.”

“Oh, yeah?” Maddox said, puffing in the background.

“You’re damn straight I am.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“I’m not going to let you do it.”

“Do you really think I’m trying to sabotage you?” He seemed amused.

“Aren’t you?”

“I already told you no.” After a short pause, he was standing next to the treadmill, his hand resting on the safety handles. “I know I made a negative impression on you, Lindy. Admittedly, it wasn’t unintentional. But I’m motivated to make agents better, not tank their careers.”

“Does that include Sawyer?”

“Agent Sawyer has a history in our squad that you know nothing about.”

“So, educate me.”

“It’s not my story to tell.”

“That’s it?” I smirked.

“I don’t get your meaning.”

“You’re not allowing him to speak to me because of someone else’s story?”

Maddox shrugged. “I just like to get in his way.”

“Your tantrum in my office
after
Agent Sawyer left was you getting in his way. Right.”

Maddox shook his head and then walked away. I started to put my earbud back into my ear, but he appeared at my side once again.

“Why am I the asshole for keeping a fuckstick like Sawyer away from you?”

I pushed a button, and the treadmill came to a stop. “I don’t need your protection,” I puffed.

Maddox began to speak, but then he walked away again. This time, he pushed through the door of the men’s locker room.

After eight minutes’ worth of stewing over his attitude, I hopped off the treadmill and stomped into the men’s locker room.

Maddox had one hand on the sink, the other holding a toothbrush. His hair was wet, and he was covered only in a towel.

He spit, rinsed, and then tapped his toothbrush on the sink. “Can I help you?”

I shifted my weight. “You might be able to charm the brass all the way up to the director, but I’m onto you. Don’t think for a second that I don’t see through your bullshit. I’m not going anywhere, so you can stop whatever game you’re playing.”

He dropped his toothbrush in the sink and walked toward me. I stepped backward, quickening my pace as he did. My back hit the wall, and I gasped. Maddox slammed his palms against the wall on each side of me just above my head. He was inches from my face, his skin still dripping from his recent shower.

“I promoted you to supervisor, Agent Lindy. What makes you think I want you gone?”

I lifted my chin. “Your bullshit story about Sawyer doesn’t add up.”

“What do you want me to say?” he said.

I could smell the mint on his breath and the bodywash on his skin. “I want the truth.”

Maddox leaned in, his nose tracing my jaw. My knees nearly gave way as his lips touched my ear.

“You can have whatever you want.” He leaned back, his eyes falling to my lips.

My breath caught, and I braced myself as he moved closer, closing his eyes.

He stopped just short of my mouth. “Say it,” he whispered. “Say you want me to kiss you.”

I reached up with my fingers, sliding them down his rippled abdomen, smearing the beads of water until I touched the top of his towel. Every nerve in my body begged me to say yes.

“No.” I pushed past him and walked out the door.

I climbed back onto the treadmill, chose the fastest setting, and replaced my earbuds in my ear, changing songs until something screamy began to play.

Forty-five minutes later, breathless and sweating, I slowed my pace, walking with my hands on my hips. After my five-minute cooldown, I showered and then dressed before pinning my hair into a damp bun.

Val was waiting for me on the other side of the skywalk. “How did it go?” she asked, genuinely concerned.

I continued to walk toward the elevators, and she kept pace.

I tried my best to keep my shoulders and expression relaxed. “I ran. It was great.”

“Lie.”

“Let it go, Val.”

“You just…ran?” She seemed confused.

“Yes. How was your lunch?”

“I brought a sack—PB and J. Did he yell at you?”

“No.”

“Try to kick you out?”

“No.”

“I don’t…understand.”

I chuckled. “What’s to understand? He’s not an ogre. Actually, at this point, he might think
I’m
the ogre.”

We entered the elevator together, and I pressed the button for our floor. Val took a step toward me, getting close enough that I leaned back.

“But he is—an ogre. He’s mean and ruthless and yells at people when they walk into the fitness room during his hour even if it’s just to retrieve a left sneaker. I know. I was that agent. He screamed at me, totally lost his shit, over me trying to retrieve a fucking forgotten sneaker,” she said the last few words slow and emphatic as if she were standing in front of a snapping audience, sharing her slam poetry.

“Maybe he’s changed.”

“Since you got here? In three days? No.”

Her dismissive tone annoyed me.

“You’re being a tad excessive.”

“Dramatic?”

“Yes.”

“That’s just how I talk.”

“Dramatically?”

“Yes. Stop listening for ways to judge me, and hear what I’m trying to say.”

“Okay,” I said.

The elevator opened, and I stepped into the hall.

Val followed me toward the security door. “Joel insisted that I eat my PB and J in his office.”

“Who’s Joel?”

“Agent Marks. Pay attention. He texted me last night. He said Maddox has been weird. His baby brother is getting married next month—well, not married but remarried. No, that’s not right either.”

My face compressed. “Renewing their vows maybe?”

Val pointed at me. “Yes.”

“Why are you sharing this with me?”

“He’s going to see, you know…her.”

“The one who burned him?”

“Affirmative. The last time he went home and saw her, he came back a new man.” Her nose wrinkled. “Not in a good way. He was broken. It was scary.”

“Okay.”

“He’s sweating the trip. He told Marks…this is fucking classified, do you hear me?”

I shrugged. “Go.”

“He told Marks that he was kind of glad you transferred here.”

I walked into my office and welcomed Val with a small smile, and she breezed past me. As the door fit snuggly into the frame, I made a show of making sure it was closed, and then I flipped around, the wood of the door feeling cold and rough, even through my blouse.

“Oh my God, Val! What do I do?” I hissed, feigning panic. “He is
kind of glad
?” I made the most awful face that I was capable of and then began to pant.