Bear in the Rough: Bear Shifter Romance (Broken Hill Bears Book 1) (3 page)

“Yup. I took down some enemy insurgents in the Middle East.”

“How many?” Rocco said eagerly.

“I don’t know. I wasn’t keeping count.”

“Dude, you’re boring.” Rocco’s tone became distinctly teenage again. “Anyway, what are you doing back here? Has dad asked you to take over as Alpha?” Xander fought to prevent the surprise showing on his face.

“What gives you that idea?”

“Everyone’s been talking about it. If he’d wanted Maximus to be Alpha, he would’ve asked him already.” Xander frowned.

“But why does anyone think he’s looking to abdicate?” he demanded.

“The clan’s been waiting for it ever since his heart attack.”

Xander looked at him with darkness in his eyes. Rocco’s customary smirk dropped from his face and his eyes opened wide as he read Xander’s expression.

“You didn’t know he had a heart attack like three months ago?”

“This is the first I’m hearing about it,” he said in a hard tone. Rocco shook his head slowly.

“Man, I thought it was a little cold that you didn’t come back. But it looks like mom and dad kept it from you.”

“So, what’s the story? Is he okay now?”

“They don’t know. There’s a chance he could have another one –” Rocco stopped talking and bit down on his lower lip. Xander saw how hard he was trying to keep himself together, and he fought to control the grief welling up inside himself.

“It’s so typical of father. Always being tactical and strategic.” he said, as much to himself as to Rocco.

“I guess they didn’t want to call you back unless they had to.”

“Good morning my sons,” their father’s deep voice rumbled from behind them, and his huge, gnarled hands landed on their shoulders. “Xander, are you ready to address the clan?”

“Father?” Xander said, his voice full of accusation and pain.

“I didn’t want to burden you with too much information last night,” his father said, instantly realizing that he’d heard the news.

“To hell with last night. Why didn’t you call me back when it happened?”

“Because you were on active duty, son.” Xander opened his mouth to reply, then closed it again. It was impossible to argue with his father. Once he’d decided that something was the right thing to do, that was it. “Come on, let’s speak to the clan.”

As Xander followed his father into the hall where the gathering was being held, he observed that he was moving with energy and purpose. It had evidently been a weight off his shoulders to have Xander safely back. He’d obviously been thinking about how much time he had left, he realized, with a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach.

As they entered the building, Xander saw a sea of faces, which all seemed to be fixed on him. The family stood in front of the clan and he picked out the bears he knew the best – Braxton and Ryker, bears his own age, who had also matured over the past years. They looked strong and capable, identically huge and muscular. They each nodded to him, sending friendly glances his way, and he resolved to catch up with them as soon as possible. There were also identical twins, Deacon and Gunner, and their cousin Mikal.

His father began to say the momentous words to the clan but Xander heard nothing. Instead, he scanned the crowd. Despite the emotional pain he was in, his brain took over. He was highly trained to identify and analyze, and he picked out the reactions of the individual clan members, gathering information on who was likely to be an ally, and who might rebel and cause difficulties.

His father laid a hand on his back.

“I present my son, Xander, to you. The new Alpha of the Broken Hill Bears!” he announced. There was a rush of applause and Xander stepped forward.

“It’s a great honor to succeed my father as Alpha of this clan,” he said. “But with honor, comes duty. My father has been a phenomenal leader for many years, and I hope to emulate his many successes. To this end, I will devote my life to doing the best I can for the clan. As you all know, I’ve been serving on active duty in the US military for the past five years, and I anticipate that the experience I’ve gained in the military field will make me a better Alpha. Not least the time I’ve spent living alongside humans and understanding their natures. It’s more important than ever that we understand the human race if we’re going to keep living alongside them in harmony.”

He spoke confidently, fluently, but his brain was still scanning, still analyzing. And some of the things he saw worried him.

He finished speaking and there was another round of applause. Then above it came a deep rumbling voice. Xander recognized it immediately as the voice of one of the elders, Zanko, a very traditional and humorless bear, who, nevertheless, was esteemed as a fearless fighter who had defended the clan against Black Paw Ridge attacks on many occasions.

“He’s not mated,” Zanko bellowed from the back of the gathering. “An Alpha must have a mate.” His father sighed, only loud enough for Xander to hear.

“Give the bear a break, Zanko. He’s been in the military for the last few years. Where do you expect him to have found mate while he was on active duty. In the middle of the desert?” There was a lot of laughter, but some grumbling too, and Xander observed a slew of comments passing between Zanko and his cronies.

Xander’s father turned to him and laid his hand on his shoulder, eyes bright with pride.

“This is all yours now, Xander, this difficult, tiresome, argumentative bunch. Welcome to your clan.” As he spoke the final words, his eyes became glassy. He clutched his chest and his mouth fell open in a silent expression of agony. He crashed to the floor, like an ancient and majestic tree struck by lightning. Xander reacted quickly enough to cushion the fall with his arms, falling down with his father at the same time. He crouched over him.

“Xander,” his father said, his voice reduced to a whisper. “Choose the mate your heart desires. Don’t let them force you into a match. But please, find your mate soon.” His eyes glazed over and his body went limp. His father, the mighty leader of the Broken Hill Bears, was dead. Xander let out a bellow that shook the hall to its rafters.

Campo, California

Eloise Mathers heaved her giant pack onto her back, and promptly fell over, arms and legs flailing. Marin Carter burst out laughing, bent over, gasping for breath and cackling until her round cheeks were bright pink.

“Eloise!” Freya Wright exclaimed, frustration seeping though every pore. “Now do you believe me? You need to cut your possessions in half – at least – or this trip’s going to be hell.”
For all of us
, she added silently. Not for the first time, she wondered why she hasn’t chosen to hike the Pacific Crest Trail alone, instead of with two old friends from high school. It had seemed like a good decision six weeks ago, when they’d all met up at a school reunion. Freya told the other two that she was planning on hiking the entire west coast of the USA, all the way from Mexico to Canada, along a hiking trail that had been purpose-built many years earlier. To her surprise, both women had looked fascinated, rather than appalled. Marin said right away that she was keen to join her. It had always been her dream to do it as well, since her grandma had completed most of the trail in her youth. She’d just been waiting for the right opportunity. She was working a dead-end job, but she had some savings. Why not take the time out? Eloise’s eyes got very big as Freya explained exactly what was involved: walking up to 20 miles per day; carrying your food with you; not washing for days at at time. Freya couldn’t have been more shocked when Eloise called her two days later, saying she wanted to join.

“I’ve put on 40 pounds since you saw me last,” she said. “I’ve been married and divorced. I own half of a house that I don’t give a crap about. I never finish anything I start. I need to do something different. I need a new beginning.”

Freya’s spirits had lifted. She’d been terrified of doing the hike by herself. Having two friends accompany her suddenly seemed to make the prospect of the long hike about one third as scary.

But then Eloise had turned up yesterday not having lost any of the weight she’d promised to, admitting that she’d been
kinda too busy
to do any of the preparation hikes that Freya had suggested. She’d also brought way, way too much stuff with her. Marin also had too much stuff. And while she looked like she’d been working out a little, she was acting like everything was a joke. Her boots were old and she’d made some weird food choices.

Freya couldn’t fail to complete the trail. Ever since she’d heard about its existence while surfing the internet one day, she’d been convinced that it was what she needed to do. The idea had been burning bright in her mind, as something that would bring her the salvation and inner peace that she’d lacked so far in her life. The Pacific Crest Trail formed a curious parallel to her own life. She was born in Washington state. When she was eight years old, her father disappeared. Just like that. He was supposed to be taking her to the zoo one day. But before they left the house, he went out, saying he had to run a quick errand. And he never came back. Six months later, Freya’s mom moved the two of them to Southern California, “to put as much distance between us and that son of a bitch as possible,” as she was fond of explaining. Freya had been distraught, convinced that he was going to come back, and that he’d have no idea they’d moved to the other end of the country. Even in San Diego, she’d spent her childhood waiting for him, convinced that there’d be a knock on the door one day and it’d be him, with his arms wide open and an explanation for why he’d gone away.

“What kind of excuse would make up for what he did to us, child?” her mom had said. “He was abducted by aliens? The FBI snatched him off the streets after he was framed for a crime he didn’t commit?
Please
.”

Despite her intentions, the Californian weather didn’t do anything for her mom’s mood, and she turned into a bitter, lonely woman, intent on pickling her liver with alcohol. She’d died two years earlier, which Freya had to admit had almost been a mercy. But now Freya was alone, and had grown up prickly and distrustful of people. Her friends called her ‘prickles’ and guys never hung around long, after they’d gotten a closed door in their faces enough times. On the whole, she preferred her own company, and had to force herself to work with others.

But she knew there was a hole in her life that she needed to fix. And she suspected that hole was located somewhere in Washington. Losing her father and her home town in a short space of time had been traumatic. She’d never even been back there. In her early teens, she’d longed to return, and had begged her mom to take them back, so they at least go see all the old places that she’d stored in her memory, but her mom had refused. And then, something had shifted in her mind, and she’d begun to see the north of the country as somewhere dark and foreboding. The place where her open, trusting nature had been completely flipped on its head, and where, in a real sense, she’d lost her mom as well as her dad. It had been a shock to discover that this narrow little trail, which led all the way back home, had existed alongside her, all her life. And she decided it was time to go back to Washington, on her own terms. Maybe that way, she’d be able to reclaim everything she’d lost.

Because of the shifting of the seasons, there was only a small window for trekking the trail end to end, and it had seemed like fate that the window was open at the exact time that she was free to do the hike. Even more so, that her friends were also free.

Freya helped Eloise disentangle herself from her pack and struggle into an upright position again.

“What can I take out though?” Eloise said, her voice a little shrill. Freya realized with dismay that she was close to tears.

“Come on, I’ll help you,” she said in a softer tone. “Take everything out and lay it on the bed.”

Several minutes later, Eloise’s possessions were spread all over the comforter, and Freya and Marin were listing everything that she had to leave behind –
hairdryer, big shampoo bottle, extra socks, extra panties, blanket, electric shaver.

“But all these things are so small,” Eloise protested.

“And they all add up,” Freya said sternly. “Okay, let’s try the pack again,” she said at last. Eloise threw the pack over her shoulder and gasped.

“Oh my gosh, that’s so much better,” she said. Freya smiled, relieved that she was starting to see the benefit. Then she turned to Marin.

“Now your turn,” she said.

Three hours later, the packs were ready, they’d gone to the post office and mailed all the excess items to Marin’s brother, who’d generously agreed to help them out throughout the hike, they’d bought a whole stack of blister band aids, and they were sitting in a diner, munching on three giant cheeseburgers and a heap of fries. Freya had spread a paper map across the table and she was frowning at it intently.

“Can we not just figure it out as we go along?” Marin asked. “Like, let’s aim for 15 miles a day, but if we don’t make it, we can just stop early.” Freya bit back another burst of frustration.
Stay calm. If we fall out before we even get started, this is going to be a disaster
, she told herself.

“No – as I was saying earlier – there aren’t so many places to get water, so if we get stuck someplace overnight that doesn’t have a supply, we’ll be screwed,” she said, in a gentler tone than she was feeling. Both Eloise and Marin gave her that wide-eyed look again.

“We’re going to be far away from any stores aren’t we?” Marin said. “I know my grandma told me about how hard it was to get food etc, but I thought that was just because it was back in the 60s.” Freya laughed.

“I believe things have improved a lot since then, but it’s still wilderness, you know. And there aren’t too many convenience stores half way up a mountain.” Marin bit her lip.

“I’m being naïve aren’t I?” she said.

“Look, I think we’re all being naïve to an extent. I think the PCT is something that you can’t appreciate until you actually do it. Like, I know my feet are going to hurt, and I’m probably going to feel thirsty some of the time, but I can’t imagine how hard that’s going to be.” Marin nodded. But Eloise had gone very pale.

“What’s wrong, Eloise?” Freya said.

“You look like you just remembered that you didn’t bring any bras with you, girl,” Marin added. Eloise was pointing at a photo of a bear occupying the bottom-left-hand corner of the map.

“There are bears out there?” she said in a wobbly voice.

“A couple. But they, like, never attack hikers. And we’ve just got to be sensible and keep our food up in trees or in special metal boxes. I’ve done a ton of research and it’s fine.”

Eloise’s expression hadn’t changed one bit.

“Guys. I don’t think I can do this. It’s too much. I’m scared shitless of bears. And I’m not good with dehydration. I need to drink water regularly. And coffee. Oh my god. What was I thinking? I need coffee before I do anything in the mornings. This is too much. I’m sorry, but I’ve bitten off way more than I can chew. I think it’s best if I don’t come with you.”

Freya stared at Eloise and then at Marin, seeing her own confusion mirrored in Marin’s face. They were both thinking the same thing. Eloise was probably going to hate the hike. And it would probably be easier if she wasn’t there. There was a good chance she’d slow them down and make it harder for them to go right through to the end.

“Eloise, are you sure about this?” Freya said gently. Eloise’s mouth turned down at the corners and tears sprang to her eyes.

“Yes,” she said. “I don’t want to ruin it for you guys either by freaking out all the time or keeping you waiting.”

“Don’t worry about us. You’ve got to think about what you need,” Marin said, taking Eloise’s hand. “We want you to come. Are you absolutely sure you’ve made the right decision?” Eloise nodded fast and screwed her napkin up in her fist.

“Yes, I’m sure. I’ll stay with you all tonight and wave you off.  And when I get home, I’ll think about some other adventure I can undertake that won’t involve bears and caffeine deprivation.” She gave a burst of relieved laughter. “Okay, let’s have that beer we were talking about and toast you girls going off on your adventure!”

They were all quiet during the rest of the meal and the journey home. But Freya’s brain was spinning with conflicted thoughts. Her first reaction when Eloise had said she wasn’t coming was relief. Relief that Eloise wasn’t going to ruin her big plan. It would be better for Marin too, she told herself. Marin had a lifelong dream to hike the trail. Imagine if she got part way through and they had to stop because Eloise couldn’t make it or something. She’d probably never go back and attempt it again. She had a feeling that the hike was one of those things that was so big that if you failed, that was it. No second chances.

Back at the motel, they all took turns to use the bathroom. Eloise insisted on sleeping on the pullout sofa so that the other two could have a bed each.

“It’s the last time you’ll be sleeping on a real bed for a while,” she insisted. They all climbed into their beds. It was a full two hours earlier than Freya usually went to bed, but she was beat. Her nerves were frazzled from all the adrenaline racing around her system. The thought that she’d wake up tomorrow and start a 3,000-mile hike was pretty terrifying. As she began to drift into unconsciousness, a fog of unease filtered into her thoughts. She was being unfair to Eloise, making out that her motivation for doing the hike wasn’t as strong as hers and Marin’s. Eloise needed this. Freya had sensed how miserable Eloise was with her life when they’d met at the school reunion. How much she hated herself for never finishing anything she started. And this would be just one more thing. She recalled the determination in her voice when she’d called her. She could help her. She’d spent the past few years being self-sufficient, not needing anything from anybody and not having anyone to look after. And that was how she’d wanted things to be. But she could go out on a limb and do something good for an old friend. She switched the light on and sat up.

“Eloise, you’re hiking the trail with us,” she announced.

“Huh?” Eloise mumbled, squinting in the bright light.

“We’re not leaving you. You’re coming with us, and we’re going to get through this all together. We’ll take it slow, stay in motels as much as we can, and skip the worst parts, as I sure as hell don’t want to break a leg in the Sierra Nevada.”

“What?” Eloise said, struggling to process Freya’s words.

“You’re doing the hike,” Marin said, speaking very slowly.

“I am?”

“Yes!” Freya and Marin exclaimed in unison. Eloise looked from one to the other, her eyes wide and unfocused without her glasses on.

“Okay!” she said, throwing her arms in the air.

“O-kay!” the other two yelled. Eloise leapt out of bed.

“Girls, I’m sorry that I’m in my nightshirt right now, but I’m going to hug you all!” she yelled running across the room and launching herself onto Freya in a giant bear hug. Marin took her cue, leaping out of bed jumping onto Freya’s bed too, and soon the three of them were bouncing on the bed and shrieking.

“Guys, this is going to be so great!” Marin said, and Freya finally believed her.

The following day dawned, a cool and bright 58 degrees. The girls ate a huge breakfast and called a taxi to take them to the trail head. They sang all the way there, excitable and full of anticipation.