Banger's Ride: Insurgents Motorcycle Club (Insurgents MC Romance Book 5) (15 page)

The way he had enshrined her memory in his home, how he said his wife’s name, told her that he’d loved the woman very much. How could she ever compete with her? A past love could never be matched, and Belle was up against a woman who would never grow old. She had to compete with rosy-hued memories that would keep gaining luster as time went on, while she would grow old, gaining lines and sunspots on her face as time marched forward. Grace was eternally immortalized in youth in Banger’s mind.

Perhaps Belle would still be the grieving widow, if she hadn’t found out about Harold’s cheating. Although she’d never been in love with him the way Banger was with Grace, she did love and care for him. When she’d found out he’d been sleeping with another woman, it had broken her heart, and she still wasn’t over it entirely. But Banger made her feel happy and alive, the sex with him was mind-blowing, something she really needed to relieve all the tension in her life.

Maybe she was overthinking this whole situation with Banger. She wasn’t even sure she wanted to be more than what they were. From the look around his house, he wasn’t ready to bring another woman into his life, but she didn’t think she was ready to bring another man into hers either. The last thing she wanted was her heart to be broken again. She would rather miss out on love than plunge into the deep waters of a relationship. She didn’t want to drown, and from the way her body responded to Banger, and the way she felt when they were together, she knew she could fall head over heels in love. It was better to have a good time and keep it light rather than throwing caution to the wind.

She could push her feelings down; she wasn’t the young girl who had blindly given her heart and body to Jake back in high school. She had fallen in love too quickly and too completely with him, and he’d taken everything, then called her a slut when she told him she was pregnant with Emily. His good-bye to her was a black eye and a split lip. She had been so in love with Jake and he’d hurt her so badly, and never even came by to see his daughter.

Then she’d met Harold and they’d married. Even though she hadn’t been head over heels for him like she had been with Jake, she’d cared for Harold and promised herself she’d make him a good wife and give him a good home. And she had, for fifteen years, but then she’d learned of his betrayal. She’d been hurt and so angry that she’d sworn he’d pay. Something had snapped inside her, and she’d decided she wasn’t going to let another man trample on her heart. Then he’d died, and a sense of relief had come over her. The thought of him with another woman would never be again, and that had calmed her, soothed her sadness
and
her anger.

No, she was done giving herself to any man. Light and easy, that’s what she’d do, and from the looks of his house, Banger wasn’t ready to do anything more than that either.

Picking up the phone, she dialed Holly. “Hey, Holly. Just a quick call to ask if you want to get together on Saturday for coffee while Ethan’s at the movies with his friends.”

“What time?”

“Is one o’clock good?”

“Yeah, that’s fine. Can I ask what it’s about?”

“It’s about Emily. I think I’m going to take you up on your offer and have her stay with you until the semester’s over. I just wanted to get together with you to go over the details.”

There was a short pause before Holly spoke. “I know how hard this is for you, but I think you’re making the right decision. One o’clock is fine on Saturday.”

“Great. We’ll talk then.”

Belle put the phone in her pocket and went into the ladies’ room, locking the door behind her. Leaning against the beige-tiled wall, she covered her face and sobbed.

*     *     *

When she returned
home from work, Belle found Ethan in front of the TV playing one of his video games. He had called earlier in the day to tell her that he was feeling great but was starving because he hadn’t eaten hardly anything for the past week. He’d begged his mom that morning to let him have a pizza for dinner, and she’d reluctantly agreed. Emily had gone out with friends again, and Belle said a silent prayer that she would be home at a decent hour, and sober.

“Hi, Mom. Having pizza, right?”

“How are you feeling, sweetheart? I just want to make sure you’re ready.” She walked over to Ethan and placed a hand on his forehead. “You’re not running a fever anymore. I’ll order the pizza, but I don’t want you to overdo it by eating too much. I’ll just go upstairs and change, then place the order.”

“Mom, can Banger come over to join us? I want to show him my baseball cards, and I want to see his too.”

“I can call him. I think he’d like to come over and see your cards.”

Belle trudged up the stairs and sent a quick text to Banger asking if he wanted to join her and Ethan for pizza and possibly a movie. His quick response made her smile. All of a sudden, her feet didn’t hurt as much, and she felt giddy. She’d get to spend an evening with her son and Banger. In that moment, it didn’t get any better.

A half hour later, Banger and Ethan were on the couch exchanging baseball cards, laughing, and telling each other anecdotes about the players. A warmth spread over her as she watched her son chattering with Banger, his face lit up like a Christmas tree and his hands flying all around as they always did when he was excited. She smiled; it felt good to have a man around and hearing Ethan talk about the things he used to with his dad. She knew her son really missed that.

Belle excused herself and went into the kitchen to make a big salad to go with the pizza. She sliced the carrots and radishes, then cubed the mozzarella cheese, adding all of it to a bowl of romaine lettuce, pepperoni, salami, and Italian peppers. Pouring a homemade creamy Italian dressing she had whipped up, she tossed the salad, then quickly dashed to the door when the bell rang. The pizza guy handed her two steaming boxes, and she reached for her purse. Before she could pay though, Banger handed money to the delivery guy. As she took out a twenty from her wallet, she said, “Banger, I don’t want you to pay. I invited you for dinner.”

“Put your money away, woman. I’ve never let a woman pay for anything, and I’m sure as hell not gonna start now.”

“But I want to pay. You’re my guest.”

The delivery man stood in front of them, holding two twenty dollar bills. “So, what do you guys want me to do here?”

“Take my twenty. Keep the change. Thank you.” Belle took the pizza boxes from the guy.

Glaring at the delivery man, Banger said, “Give the lady back her twenty. Best you move on now.”

Wide-eyed, the young guy hurriedly gave Belle her money back, turned around, and sprinted to his car. Banger closed the door, leaning in to place a kiss on her lips. He pulled away and winked. She shook her head, her eyes twinkling, and left to bring the salad and plates.

After filling up the salad bowls, she squeezed in between Banger and Ethan, nibbling on a slice of pepperoni and green pepper pizza. “You want to put a movie on, Ethan?”

“Yeah.” Turning toward Banger, he asked, “Have you ever seen the movie
Field of Dreams
? It was my dad’s and my favorite movie. We always watched it together, especially on pizza nights.” Ethan jumped up to grab the DVD.

Banger put his beer bottle down on the coffee table. “No, I don’t think I’ve ever seen that movie. It sounds like it’s about baseball.”

Ethan nodded emphatically.

“Then it’s a go for me.”

Belle sat quietly, watching the exchange between Ethan and Banger. She knew it meant something to her son to share his favorite movie with someone other than his father. Behind her eyes, unshed tears burned, and she grasped Banger’s hand and squeezed it tightly. He squeezed back and rubbed his knee against hers, and she placed a kiss on his cheek. When Ethan sat back down next to her, she put her arms around him, clasping his shoulder. Ethan glanced affirmatively at Banger then said, “Aw, Mom.”

By the time the movie was over, they had gone through two pizzas, a large bowl of salad, and three bowls of popcorn. Belle chided herself for letting Ethan talk her into all the popcorn, but he was having such a good time and she hadn’t seen him so animated for a long while.

Ethan yawned and cushioned his head against his mother’s arm.

“You tired, sweetheart?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Let’s go up to bed.”

As she began to rise, Ethan said, “Mom, you don’t have to go up with me. I’m not sick anymore.” He padded toward the stairs then stopped and looked at Banger. “Good night. Thanks for showing me your cards.”

“Sure. You have some kick-ass cards in your collection. Loved seeing ‘em.”

Ethan ran up the stairs, yelling, “‘Night, Mom!”

Belle stood to pick up the plates, but Banger grasped her wrists, pulling her down on him. Laughing, she pushed him away. “Stop. I have to clear the dishes. It’ll take a few minutes to clean up then I’ll be back.”

“The dishes can wait ‘til later, because I’m not going one more minute without my lips on yours.” His mouth covered hers and a tingle of excitement rushed up her spine as she melted under his kiss. “Do you know how hard it was sitting next to you, feeling the heat of your body? And fuck, your sweet scent wrapped right around my cock. It was fuckin’ hard for me not to be able to touch you like a man wants to touch a woman. I need you, beautiful.”

“I need you too, but we can’t go all the way with Ethan upstairs.”

“Then I guess we’ll have to make out like two horny teenagers.” He ran his finger down the side of her face, past her neck, stopping at her cleavage. Locking their gazes, his lips grazed against hers, teasing her with a kiss that didn’t come.

Goose bumps pricked her skin as she pressed closer, his clove and leather scent driving her crazy. He pushed a few strands of hair off her forehead then touched his lips to it, kissing her softly. She shuddered, and his low chuckle electrified her. She loved his gravelly, baritone voice; it was the type made for whispering nasty things in her ear.

Just as Banger glided his hand into Belle’s damp panties, the front door opened and she scrambled to sit up. Emily stumbled in, and Belle twisted out of Banger’s arms and went to her daughter.

“You broke your curfew again. You know, Emily, I’m damn sick and tired of this. You’re grounded. Now, go up to your room.”

Emily laughed bitterly. “Shut the fuck up! I’m done with you telling me what to do. I’m done with all the shit in this house.”

“How dare you speak to me like that! I’m your mother, you will not speak to me that way, do you understand me? You’re tired of the shit in this house? Well, I’m sick and tired of your attitude, laziness, and disrespect. We’ll talk about this in the morning. Go to your room.”

“I’ll say and do whatever the fuck I want. I’m sick of you, and living in this piece-of-shit rental.” Emily drew closer to her mom and raised her hand as if to strike her. But before she could bring it down, a strong grip stopped it.

Banger said, in a deep, stern voice, “Don’t even think about it, missy.”

“Who the fuck are you?” Emily snapped.

“I’m the one who’s gonna make sure you respect your mama.”

She looked at Belle. “Mom?”

Belle said softly, “It’s okay, Banger. You can let go. Emily, this is my friend, Banger.”

Emily looked Banger up and down as he stepped back, disgust spreading across her face. “Seriously, Mom? I don’t think so.”

Banger crossed his arms. “Nobody here is asking for your approval. I’m just telling you that I don’t like the way you’re talking to your mom, and I’m not gonna sit here and watch you hurt her.”

“I don’t think this is your business.” Emily turned away, as if dismissing him.

“When I care ‘bout someone, I don’t let her get hurt, even if it’s her fuckin’ brat who’s doin’ the hurtin’. No one does that shit when I’m around.” Anger flashed in his ice-blue eyes. “No one,” he hissed.

Belle’s stomach tightened, and she shook like a leaf as she watched the exchange between her daughter and Banger. She tried to say something, but the words were caught in her throat.
Emily had been ready to
hit
me.

Emily looked down and mumbled, “I wasn’t going to hurt my mom.”

“From the tears in her eyes and the way she’s shaking, I’d say you already did.”

In a low voice, Emily said, “I didn’t mean it, Mom.” She pushed past her and ran up the stairs.

When Belle heard her bedroom door close, she turned to Banger and said, “I appreciate your intentions, but I’d rather you not reprimand my daughter. That’s my job and responsibility.”

“Agreed, but it didn’t seem like you had a handle on it. Your daughter has a mouth on her, and you need to rein her in or she’s gonna get in some big trouble.”

Her jaw tightened. “I know that. She’s just having a real hard time since her father died. We used to live in a big house and she attended private schools. Money was never a problem, and I was always at home. Her life was so different from what it is now. It’s been a hard adjustment on her.” Belle wrung her hands together and said softly, “On all of us.”

Banger took her hands and brought them to his lips, kissing them. “Some changes in life are harder than others. It fuckin’ sucks when we get a curveball thrown at us, but we gotta deal with it and move forward. She’s had over a year to come to terms with her new life. Being disrespectful to her mama shouldn’t be acceptable under any circumstances. And if I weren’t here, the kid would’ve hit you. Who the fuck hits their mom?”