Backstage Dirty (The Savage Light Rockers #1) (12 page)

He smiled and reached out to push a stray piece of hair out of her face. “You’ll come to the show tonight?”

“Of course, I guess I’ve just been trying to get everything down because I want to get this right.” She rolled onto her back and lifted her ass so she could fix her skirt, and then went back onto her side, facing him. “But I would love to see you guys perform again.” They stayed silent for a moment, and she watched as he closed his eyes and placed his hands behind his head, taking on a more relaxed position. Tanner let herself look at the defined cords of muscles along the underside of his arms, the ones that not even the tattoos on his arms could cover. He was once again wearing a plain t-shirt, barely confining his strength. God, when had he gotten so big? Back in the day he had been taller than most of the guys around them, and had a bigger build, but his frame now was all hard and trained muscle. She moved her gaze up his neck and over his face. His eyes were still closed, and she could tell by his breathing that he was falling asleep.

“I’m glad I’m not the only one that likes to stare at you.” He cracked one eye open.

Without thinking she reached up and brushed his dark hair off of his forehead. “I prefer to say I am gazing longingly at you.” She grinned and moved closer to him so she could rest her head on his chest. When he wrapped his arm around her and pulled her in tight, the feeling that she was right where she needed to be filled her. What was suddenly on her mind was probably a mood killer, but she’d prefer to get it off of her chest and move past it. If she didn’t ask him about Laura then she’d always wonder what had happened between the two of them, even if it really didn’t matter at this point in time.

“I can hear you thinking.” Jacks sounded sleepy, but amused. Here he was, lying with his pants
around his ankles and his junk hanging out, yet he didn’t even care.

“How can you hear someone think?” She ran her hand down his chest and stopped when she got to the edge of his shirt. Pushing the material up slightly, she rested her open palm on his flat,
rippled stomach and closed her eyes.

“Even when I can’t see your face, and you’re not saying anything, I can read you. I always have been able to, Tanner.” He curled his fingers around her shoulder, pressed his nose to the top of her head, and once again she heard him inhale.

“You fucked that Laura chick.” She didn’t phrase it like a question, because obviously she knew he had from Five telling her, and also from the way Laura looked at Jacks. He sighed deeply, but didn’t answer right away, and of course she felt like this petty jealous girlfriend. “I’m just curious is all, because she looks at you like she wants to tear your clothes off and glares at me like she wants to rip my throat out.”

“She won’t bother you.”

“I’m not worried about her bothering me. I guess I’m worried about her not realizing that you and I…”

“Are together, Tanner, and I know you’re trying to not let it bother you or be jealous, but you are.” He pushed back enough that he could look down at her. “Remember when I said that this is a crazy road you’ll be agreeing to go on?”

She nodded.

“I meant it. I’m not trying to be cocky, but
Laura isn’t the only one that wants to tear my clothes off. Fame and money make people insane, and make them want something they normally wouldn’t have wanted.” He smoothed finger down the bridge of her nose. “Yeah, I slept with, Laura. Once. But I told her before you even agreed to come on tour that there is nothing else between us. It was one night of drunken sex…” He seemed to stop speaking, as if he had caught himself before he said something he didn’t want her to hear. Tanner could only imagine the things that he had done, things that were exciting, exhilarating, and downright dirty. “But I’ll tell you this, Tanner. You’re the only girl I want from this point on if I’m the only guy you want.”

Her heart was beating fast and hard, and she heard it in her ears and felt it in her throat. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted.” And it was the truth.

“Laura’s dad is a roadie, and I know she’s had a hard life growing up. I can’t exactly tell her to leave the tour.”

She shook her head before he finished speaking. “I would never ask you to do that, and I am sure my jealousy is nothing, and I am just letting my emotions get to me.” She smiled. Now she really felt like a petty bitch for bringing it up. Who knew how many women he had slept with, roadie daughters or not? She was just going to have to get used to it, because that was the life she had chosen to go along with.

“But I only want you, baby.” He leaned in and kissed her. “If five years hadn’t passed the way it had, you would have been my girl, and there would have been no one else.” He had murmured the words against her lips, and when he pulled away it was to keep her close to him.

She rested her head on his chest once more, listened to his heart beat a slow and steady rhythm, and knew that she needed to toughen the fuck up. No doubt she would see a hell of a lot more debauchery from the rabid fan girls in the weeks to come.

Chapter
Ten

The band was in a backroom warming up in the way they did before every show. Beats was in his own world with his headphones on, his eyes closed, and his drumsticks in hand as he beat them on the table top to the rhythm of whatever he was listening to. Matty was in one of the chairs with his guitar in his lap, picking out a tune. And then there was Five, leaning over by the bar with a bleached blonde groupie hanging off every word. His form of relaxing or getting juiced up before a show was to get his dick wet in some random chick. Not Jacks’s style, but whatever got the guys in the mood was their own business. He was on the couch with his headphones on, too, and his guitar in his lap. He mainly did vocals, but there were a few songs that he played rhythm along with Matty. The feeling of someone watching him had Jacks looking up and seeing Tanner leaning against the wall. She had her phone up to her ear, and he knew she was talking to Zoe. Over the last week she had talked to her at least once a day. He imagined it was hard being around a bunch of guys day and night, especially ones that had a tendency to live like slobs. He grinned and winked, and loved that her cheeks turned pink. She was so responsive to him, and damn if that didn’t make a guy feel good.

He looked back down at his guitar, and then closed his eyes and let the music blasting through his ears clear his head. He couldn’t hear the song he was picking out, of course, but he knew what he was playing, and doing something with his hands helped ease him before a show. For thirty minutes they sat back there, alternating between doing their own thing, talking about the set list once more, and then finally making their way toward the stage. He took hold of Tanner’s hand and led her with him so she was right by his side, and he swore he could feel her hand trembling in his. He stopped, gestured for the other guys to go without him for a second, and used his body to push her into a small, darkened corner.

“Jacks, what are you—”

He cut off her words with his mouth on hers and loved that she immediately moaned and clutched at his shoulders. He pulled away only enough that he could speak. “I have wanted to do that since we got into the venue.” He kissed her once more, and slid his hands over her shoulders, across her chest, and covered her breasts. The mounds were large, soft, and overfilled in his hand. He fucking loved it. Laying little kisses along her collarbone, he inhaled the sweet scent of her along the way, and followed the path with his tongue down to where her cleavage rose just slightly over her shirt. “I could take you again, Tanner. Christ, I could take you again right here in this dark corner.”

She gasped, and he felt the prick of her nails dig into his skin through his shirt. “You’re insatiable.”

He was, but only for her. He could be hard ten minutes after they fucked, and it felt like he hadn’t even been with her. She did something to him, did something
so powerful that even five years ago he hadn’t been able to stop thinking of her. Jacks had never really believed in soul mates or love at first sight, but with Tanner things were very different. He was very different. “What can I say? When I’m around you I can’t get enough.” He started making a trail back up to her mouth with his tongue and lips while he continued to squeeze her breasts, and the dirty images of him sliding his dick between her tits and fucking her that way slammed into his head. “I won’t be able to play with this fucking hard-on, baby.”

“Yo, man, get your ass moving,” Matty yelled over at him.

Jacks groaned against Tanner’s neck. “We will finish this afterwards.” He pulled away and looked at her, and the way her eyes were half-lidded, her lips parted, and her cheeks red, was a sight that nearly had him saying fuck it all and dragging her back to the tour bus.

“Go on.” She smiled and placed her hands on his chest. “I’m anxious to experience this, too. I’ve never been backstage like this and watched a band perform, let alone Savage Light, one of the biggest bands in the world.” There was no sarcasm in her voice, as if she were trying to mimic one of the screaming fans or young girls that wanted their autographs. She sounded genuinely excited, and that pleased him.

The sound of Black Pearl belting out their last song was loud, angry, and sounded incredible. They might not be nearly as well-known as Savage Light, but for how awesome their music was, Jacks knew they would rise to the top in no time. With one more kiss to Tanner he turned and headed to where Matty, Five, and Beats were. The band always gave the best show they could for their fans, but now his girl was watching, and he was going to really fucking make sure it was a night she wouldn’t forget.

Fuck!

Tanner watched the guys move on stage, and the sound of the crowd going wild was insane. Even from where she stood far behind the scenes she could lean to the side and partially see the massive auditorium of the Quicken Loans Arena. There were thousands upon thousands of people, and she had overheard some of the staff comment on how there were at least twenty grand. Pride filled her that these guys—Savage Light—had made it so far in their career.

“They are pretty spectacular, aren’t they?”

Tanner turned and glanced at Laura, who had spoken behind her. The woman gave her a saccharine smile, but Tanner could tell it was fake as hell. But she smiled and nodded. “Yeah, they really are.”

Laura
moved in front of her and leaned against the wall, partially obstructing her view.

What the shit?
Before Tanner could make a comment on the fact she had obviously stood right in front of her Laura started talking once more.

“Yeah, I’ve been on tour with them for the last six months.”
Laura looked over her shoulder and grinned, like she was trying to rub it in that she had been with the band for less than a year. It was hard to hear her talk as it was because of the noise, but now this woman was trying to make it seem like she had some kind of claim with the band without actually saying the words?
No. Just no.
“I’m pretty close with the band since I am around them all the time.”

Laura
may not have said the words out loud, but Tanner could hear the laced meaning behind them. Again, another jab that Laura had some kind of claim on the band, like she was close with them in more ways than one. Tanner supposed she was in a sense.

“Yeah, I heard you’re here with your dad.” Tanner wasn’t going to say anything, but of course the words came out of her mouth on her own.

Laura didn’t crack a smile or respond right away, but that was okay because Tanner just wanted to hear the band. Right now Jacks was speaking to them, getting them worked up, and it was doing the job as the noise became thundering.

“Listen.”
Laura turned around so she could face her, but Tanner refused to move back so she had a small amount of personal space. “You do realize that the guys, especially Jacks, have women coming and going through that tour bus like it is a revolving door?” Laura lifted a dark eyebrow, one that didn’t match the shade of her bleached blonde hair. She had her hair currently teased and put in one of those high ponytails that reminded Tanner of the eighties. She was also wearing these acid washed jeans that were tight enough they looked like they were painted on. Yes, the girl had a nice body in a very skinny model kind of way. But the amount of make-up, hairspray, and the clothing she chose to wear, just made her look cheap.

“And what exactly are you getting at?” The band had started playing, and although she had to shout to be heard, Tanner was focused on this woman that was basically calling her just another groupie. Tanner should have let it go, should have just told
Laura that she wasn’t just another chick they were fucking, that she was actually working for the band, and was with Jacks. But of course she hadn’t. Maybe it was because she wanted to see how far Laura would go, wanted to see when she would stop this petty and jealous shit and just come out and say what she wanted to say instead of beating around the bush.

Laura
got this hardened look on her face. Good, maybe she’d finally just spit it out, and then Tanner could say what she was going to say. “Once they have had their fun, Jacks especially, your ass will be gone, just like the rest of them, and I’ll still be here—”

“With your dad?” It was Tanner’s turn to lift a brow. “Because that’s what you said, right? You’re here with your dad? What, you’re like twenty but don’t have a job and instead are jumping all over my shit because you’re jealous?”

Laura opened her mouth, but promptly snapped it shut and narrowed her eyes.

“Listen, I’m not in high school any longer, don’t need this shit, and am certainly not a girl the guys are just passing around.” Tanner took a step closer and leaned in so her mouth was only inches from
Laura’s ear. She had to give the girl credit. She didn’t move away.

“You know how many girls thought the same thing? Thought they were special?”

Tanner smiled and shook her head. “I don’t really care how many girls thought that. You’re trying to intimidate me and place some kind of proprietary stake on the band or Jacks.” Tanner shrugged. “Do what you want, because in the end you are just wasting your time.”

“I wasn’t wasting my time when Jacks fucked me good and hard, told me I was the best he’d ever had.”

Tanner wasn’t about to fall for that one. Instead, she breathed out, just wanting this conversation to end so she could enjoy the show. “And I’m telling you this strictly because I wanted you to fully understand, and not because I’m trying to prove anything.” Tanner moved back an inch so she could look in Laura’s eyes. “I work for the band, and have known those guys my entire life.” She smiled just as fake and sweet as Laura had done to her. “The only guy I am letting fuck me is Jacks, but it is because I love him and he loves me.” She let those words sink in, but Laura didn’t even blink. “So, now you know where I stand, and it’s clear I know where you stand. I think it’s safe to say we will keep our distance from each other since we won’t likely be best friends.”

With that because she was over talking to
Laura the moment the other woman had opened her mouth, Tanner moved away from her and closer to the stage. She could only get so far as there were staff and security all around, but she could see the band just fine.

They were playing one of their more popular songs, one that had the crowd singing right along, too. This was a song that Jacks played his guitar to
, and she was mesmerized by the sight of the muscles in his arms flexing as he strummed the strings. He was working up the crowd, and she glanced around at the other members. Matty was in the middle of a guitar solo, and even from the distance she could see the sweat drip down his face. But there was also this excitement that covered his expression. It moved over all the guys’ faces. She looked at Five, and the bassist had his eyes closed as he pumped his arm up and down and followed along with the other band members on the song. His hair covered his eyes, and sweat beaded down his face as he moved his hand up and down on the thick strings. The song had turned into something harder, darker, and had a faster beat to it. Five and Matty were getting more into the song, moving along the stage back and forth, and Beats pounding on the drums like he was possessed. The guys were getting into the song, and Jacks was nearly screaming the lyrics out. It was a popular one, and Tanner found herself singing along to it and moving her head up and down to the beat.

One song moved into the next in a fluid motion, and the music was like an aphrodisiac. She didn’t know how long the band played, but it ended far sooner than she would have liked. They headed off the stage, and there was a handful of staff that was there with towels, water, and firing off questions to the guys. She stayed back and out of the way. It was amazing watching all of this on the sidelines and in the back. The guys’ faces took on an almost euphoric quality, and their grins were wide. They were sweaty, but looked
intoxicated at the same time. Everything was a blur of motion, but Tanner kept to the side, partially hidden in the corner and watched the action all around her. This was like another world. She could smell the sweat and salt in the air, felt the adrenaline and testosterone pulse all around her, and knew this was how it would always be.

She honestly didn’t know how much time had passed, maybe
ten minutes but probably less, and then the guys were right back on stage for their encore. Tanner took her phone out and snapped several pictures of all of the guys playing so she could send them to Zoe. Once they were sent she looked at the guys once more, and turned around to leave. Once the show was officially over with they would come out, and when the show ended it would be even more hectic. No way did she want to be in the middle of that. Besides, she wanted to see if Zoe had gotten the images. She could even hear in her head Zoe squealing in excitement.

There were several rooms backstage, but she went to the one that the guys had hung out in right before they performed. There were a couple fold-out chairs around a small corner in the room. Once the door was shut and she was sitting in one of the chairs she dialed Zoe’s number. It was nearing ten at night, but Zoe had always been a night owl. It rang a few times, and Tanner leaned back in her chair.

“OhmygodTanner.” Zoe’s excited voice filled the line instantly, and Tanner pulled the phone away.

She started laughing. “I take it you got the pictures.” She had to pull the phone away again when Zoe all but screamed.

“Yes Oh my God, I cannot believe you are so close to them.” For the next five minutes Zoe did most of the talking about what it was like being with the band, how the job was going, and if it was as exciting as Zoe had imagined.