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Authors: Rissa Blakeley

BOOK: Awakened Desires
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Over the course of the next month, I kept popping up wherever Captain Cock-up was. I even had the pleasure of following his fox around. Her delicious arse made it worth my while.

It was another day of much of the same. I blended into the crowds and the shadows behind her. She was heading into a bridal boutique. “Very interesting,” I murmured to myself. I couldn’t go in because I would look completely out of place. A bloke like me could never fit into a wedding dress. So I hung out outside and peeked in once in a while. “Well, well, well. Oh, this is going to be fucking brill.”

I pulled out my phone and texted Drew.

Cock-up is getting hitched. I will find out when, and that will be Z-day
.

The phone rang immediately.

Elaina stepped up onto to a small stage wearing a white gown. Claire, Elaina’s best friend, smiled brightly when she spun around. “I don’t like it,” Elaina mumbled as she looked over at her mother who was chatting on the phone, her back to the scene. “Actually, I fucking hate it,” she whisper shouted.

“I think you look beautiful,” Claire said under her breath.

“It’s not me.” Tears pooled in Elaina’s eyes.

“I know, but sweetie…” Claire grabbed her hands. “Look, it doesn’t matter what you are wearing. Henry will think you’re stunning in a potato sack.”

Elaina managed a small smile through her frustration. “I just wish we could do this
our
way. He doesn’t want all this bullshit.” She yanked at the lace that was covered in pearls. “He likes simplicity. Clean lines, simple touches. And that’s what I want to give him. Not this obnoxious bullshit.”

Claire frowned. “I’m sorry. You could always show up in another dress and pay your mom back for this one.”

“Are you telling me to disobey ‘Miss Walk on the Straight and Narrow’?” They both laughed.

Elaina’s mother turned around and gasped. She held her hands over her mouth, tears instantly pouring from her eyes. Elaina rolled her eyes, and Claire snickered discretely into her hands.

“Look at my baby girl!” Elaina rolled her eyes. “You look…stunning. Breathtaking. Hold on. Let me run and get a veil.” She ran off toward the sales staff to hunt down the perfect veil.

“Claire…I can’t do this. I need to get the fuck out of here!” Elaina lifted the heavy dress and scurried back to the fitting room.

“You are shitting me, right, mate?”

“Nope.” I laughed at Drew’s reaction. “I’m looking at the fox modeling a wedding gown right now. Oh, wait…she just made a mad dash out of the room.”

“So he thinks he can have a normal life instead of doing what he was supposed to do? I’m going to talk to Roger about freezing his accounts and cards.”

“Not yet,” I said. “Give me some time.”

“You sure? Why not just get it done?”

“You have no idea how much fun this is. Between all the woman here and Cock-up knowing that I’m stalking him… I’m getting hard thinking about it.”

“Well, I’m glad your business trip has turned into such pleasure. I’ll hold off Roger for a while. Just keep me informed.”

“Will do.” The fox and a couple birds stepped out of the boutique and stormed past me. She looked like she was ready to kill. They separated with a few bitter words between them lingering in the air. “Got to run.” I hung up and nonchalantly headed down the sidewalk to avoid being caught. I watched her walk further down. She stopped and sifted through her giant bag, pulling out her phone. I had to get a little closer so I could hear the conversation.

“Hey,” she said in an annoyed tone. “I know you’re probably busy with work, but is there any way you can you come and get me? I can’t stand to be with her another minute.” There was a short pause. “I’ll be on North and Tenth.” I knew she had to be talking to Cock-up. “Okay. Love you, too.”

I hid in the shadows between two buildings, waiting for him to pull up. It was only about ten minutes before the blacked-out Tahoe rolled up to the sidewalk. The passenger window rolled down. “Excuse me, miss? Do you need a ride?”

“Why, yes, I do. Are you offering?”

“Only if you will come have coffee with me. I know a great place…”

“Okay, fine. If I have to.” She smiled at him and hopped into his truck.

To be honest, I felt a little spark of jealousy deep in my gut. I almost wished I had that, but something like that would never happen for me. It wouldn’t fit into my lifestyle.

I decided to go back to my hotel room. I didn’t feel like watching them fawn all over one another.

Chapter 7

-October 2014-

As the weeks ticked on, Carly watched Gunther traipse in and out of the hotel with a variety of women. It made her blood boil. The only person she wanted to see Gunther with was herself. However, the only thing on her mind was the fact that she had missed an important date. With feeling sick all day, every day, she decided she should take a test. Considering Gunther was her one and only, she knew who the father would be if she was, indeed, pregnant.

“Oh, god…no.” Carly’s hands shook as she held the test stick with a death grip. “No.” The tears began to fall down her cheeks. “This cannot possibly be happening.”

She grabbed her phone and almost texted Gunther, but then decided that she should wait and go to the doctor first. Maybe the stick was wrong.
Please be wrong
. That was her only hope. Her father would snap, especially when he found out the father was a random patron of their hotel, the patron they had been getting frequent complaints about the escapades happening in his suite.

Carly wrapped the stick in paper towels, throwing it in the trash bin in her office bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror, forcing herself to stand tall. She turned sideways, envisioning a baby bump. She rubbed her lower abdomen. Maybe she wouldn’t tell him. Maybe she would just do it on her own. Her father had already set up a trust fund for her, and when she turned thirty, it would be available. Then she sighed. He would surely take that away when he found out what happened.

She went back into her desk in the main part of her office and scheduled an appointment with the doctor. She needed to know for sure before she decided whether or not to talk to Gunther before he left town.

-Two Weeks Later-

Carly had a pen in her teeth, and her fiery hair was twisted up into a messy thing on top of her head. She looked stressed and on the verge of tears. I don’t know why it concerned me, but it did. I wanted to make her smile. But I also wanted to run my teeth right up that slender neck and nip her ear, then slide my tongue in places that would make her scream my name. I felt the blood rush start as I stepped up to the desk. John Thomas was thinking the same things I was.

“Hey, Carly.” She looked up at me. She took the pen out of her mouth and licked her lips. Bloody hell, that velvet tongue and those pink pouty lips…

“Good afternoon, Mr. Erikkson.” She noted how tight my black t-shirt was across my chest. I had a feeling she wished she could run her hands over my body once again.

“Carly, it’s Gunther. I think we should be on a first name basis at this point.” I smirked. She eyed me carefully, but I could see she felt that she needed to be professional. She was trying to keep her emotions in check.

“Is there a problem you need addressed, Mr. Erikkson?” I gave her my killer half-smirk. Carly shifted, probably because she felt her lacy panties dampen at the sight of me. I could almost feel her arousal, which was not good for me.

“I may have a problem that needs addressing later.”
Shit.
J.T. spoke for me again. I leaned my hip against the desk.

She cleared her throat. “Are you flirting with me, Mr. Erikkson?”

“I could be. I only have one request.”

“And what would that be?”

“No strings.” I knew it would be hard for her to manage doing that, but if I laid it out ahead of time, she might get it.

“You’ve already hurt me, Mr. Erikkson. Deeply.” Her voice caught in her throat as her slim jaw trembled. I looked down when I was smacked with the truth. “Am I the last single girl in New York at this point?”

“I’m sorry. Truly, I am. Look, this was a mistake. Sorry to bother you.” I started to walk away, but then I felt Carly’s slender, warm hand grab my elbow. Her touch was so soft, it made me ache.

“Gunther, I don’t understand it. You want me and then you don’t. You bring all sorts of random women up to your room every couple of days. We get complaints about the traffic and the noise, if you know what I mean. And now you want me again? Are you making a second trip around the city?”

I ignored her last question. “What I do on my own time is my business. I’m a paying patron like they are.” I didn’t know who those people thought they were. A bunch of holier than thou hypocrites. They were probably business people fucking some random person while their significant others dutifully waited at home for them.

“I know. But what am I supposed to think?” she persisted.

“You’re not. Look, my actions speak for themselves. I apologize that I hurt you. I was just thinking about what occurred between us and I rather enjoyed it. I’m not going to be in town too much longer. My job is almost complete. I thought one last night with you would be nice.”

She stared into my chemical-laden eyes for a few moments and swallowed hard. “I will agree to meet with you later tonight when you get back from wherever you are going. I have to talk to you about something anyway. I might as well do it then.” Her eyes filled with tears.

I tilted my head to the side.
Why the hell is she about to cry?
I grabbed her arms and she pulled away. “Are you all right?”

“Not here, not now. Just call me when you are ready to meet.”

“Will do.” I wondered what was up, but I shook it off.

I had a job to do.

By the time I made it back down to the hotel lobby after the stalking session, Carly was waiting for me. “You ready?” I asked in a murmur.

“Yeah.”

I offered her my arm, but she shook her head. I had a feeling the so-called date wasn’t going to go well. I guess my gentleman side wasn’t as gentlemanly as I thought. I would have to work extra hard to take that dip I desired. Jackson pulled up to the front entrance. “Jackson, take us to Cath’s, please.”

“No problem, Ms. Reede.”

“What’s Cath’s?”

“Just a casual burger kind of place. I have a craving for some good fries. Plus, I haven’t eaten dinner yet. Have you?”

“No. Sounds good.”

The ride was quiet. There was a lot of hand fidgeting, clothing adjustments, and long glances out the window from both sides of the back seat. Definitely wasn’t the same car ride that we had the first time around. I would’ve really liked to know what was going on. She was tough, and I hadn’t been able to crack her.

When we pulled up to the restaurant, she opened the door and jumped out before Jackson or I could say or do anything about it. Ironically, the cold that radiated from her body chilled me.

She headed right for the door without even glancing back at me. Yes, it was already proving to be a fun date. “Christ, Carly. Let me grab the door at least.”

“I’ve got it,” she snapped.

I grabbed her arm. “What the hell is going on? You are cold-shouldering me so much, I feel like I’m cruising through Antarctica on the bloody Titanic.” I realized my voice sounded a little harsh. I couldn’t let my anger sneak out. I needed to control it better because that side of me wasn’t pretty. She looked at me with a quirked brow and her eyes traveled to my hand clutching her arm. I let go and stepped back.

“Just a bad day, I guess. As a matter of fact, it’s been a bad couple of months. I apologize.”

Implication heard. “Right,” I muttered. She turned away and went toward the hostess.

Once we were seated, the hostess asked for our drink order. “I’ll just have water,” Carly said as her baby blues darted around the menu.

“I’ll take a pint of Guinness.” Promptly, the hostess walked away and I sat forward, leaning my weight on my forearms. I just looked at her. “Carly…” I reached for her hand.

She swatted at my hand like it was a bug. “Stop.”

“If you don’t want to be here with me, why the fuck are we here?”

“Because,” she snapped with indignation.

“Carly, that’s not an answer for a grown woman.”

“Who do you think you are?! My father?!” she loudly snapped at me. Must have been female problems.

She was really grating on my last nerve. “Keep your voice down,” I growled. I could have an attitude, too, but mine was a little more dangerous than she understood.

Her eyes spoke volumes when I saw the fire engulf them. She was angry as hell. “I will speak in whatever tone I damn well feel like
because
I am a grown woman.”

“What is your issue? You knew I wasn’t looking for a relationship.” I shoved the menu away because my appetite was dissolving. I was so pissed at the way she was speaking to me. I had a notion to stand my arse up and walk right the fuck out of the joint.

“I know!” We felt a presence at the end of our booth because we both looked that direction at the same time.

The waitress looked a little stunned. “Sorry to interrupt. Um…may I take your order?”

“I will have the California Turkey Burger with extra pickles,” Carly murmured.

“And for you, sir?”

“Uh…” I hadn’t even glanced at the menu yet because I was too busy trying to figure out what the fuck was going on. That was just one of the many reasons why I don’t do relationships. Too bloody confusing. I opened the menu and ordered the first thing I saw. “I’ll take the Steak Burger, medium-rare.”

“All right. I will put your order right in.”

“Thank you.” I turned back and looked at Carly as the waitress sped off. “You need to tell me what the fuck is going on.” She reached into her purse and pulled out a folded sheet of paper, sliding it across the table to me. “What’s this?”

“Just read it,” she growled.

I unfolded it and my eyes flickered across the paper. The blood drained from my face, leaving me feeling light-headed. I peeled off my jacket before sweat began pouring off of me. “Wait…” I rubbed my eyes to make sure they were working properly. “Shit.”

“Yeah.
Shit
,” she said, full of attitude.

Panic was setting in, but after taking a few deep breaths, I knew that twenty-something, now plus one, would perish in the next couple weeks. I decided that I was just going to reassure her. “You were my one and only, so don’t even try to deny it. And the timing is correct.” She stared at me for what felt like an eternity while I looked at her blankly. “Hello?” She motioned her hand in front of my face.

“Yeah…I got it. I’m not denying it.” I rubbed my face.

“Now what? You’re going home soon.”

“Yeah.”

“Is that all you have to say?” I just looked at her while playing up the worried card. “How are you going to be a father to my kid?”

“Look, I will take care of everything. I will pay for whatever you need, whatever the baby needs. I have plenty in the bank.”

“And how do I know you mean that?”

“Because I don’t run away from my responsibilities.” Wasn’t that the fucking truth? As much as I wanted to, I didn’t. The waitress set down my beer. In hindsight, I should have asked for a bottle of Walker with a side of Grey Goose. I grabbed it and took a long drink.

“I don’t know that!” Her eyes filled with tears. Christ. “My father is going to freak out!”

“Carly…I’m sorry. I should have worn protection.” I didn’t bother because I knew the future. I was fucking psychic like that.

“I’m forever linked with the whore of New York!” she snapped. It was loud enough for the people in the booth behind us to turn and look.

Anger ripped through me. “That’s not fucking fair.” I sat forward, growling at her accusation.

“Oh, it’s not? Really? You really want to go there,
Mr. Erikkson
?”

Okay, maybe she was correct. I rubbed my eyes again and then my mouth, trying to think of something to say. All I could think about was appeasement. “You’re right. I’m sorry.” I decided I couldn’t even look at her. Honestly, I felt guilty. It was a foreign feeling. I didn’t realize what it was at first, but my chest ached a bit. That didn’t happen—ever. I finished my beer as the waitress set down our meals.

“Another for you, sir?”

“Yeah, please.”

I just stared at my plate until I saw her drag her napkin across her eyes. Jesus, I really fucked up. Then I thought about the other dozen or so women I had fucked since my arrival in New York. How many would survive? Who could be pregnant? Feeling sick, I had to say something, though, so I blurted out, “It’s going to be okay. I promise.”

She sarcastically laughed through her tears. “You, Mr. Erikkson, are a funny man.” She cut her burger in half and took a bite.

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