Awaiting Fate (17 page)

A chill swept through her just thinking of it. It was all it took to get her heart racing, her temperature spiking, and her hands shaking. There was no use hiding the nerves. She wanted him. She loved him. As much as she’d dreamt of the moment, she was scared, too, because she didn’t know if she could please him and wanted to.

Despite her nerves, insecurities and rambling thoughts, she managed to mumble, “Yes.”

Pulling away slightly, she slid the strap of her dress off her shoulder. Holding her gaze, he hissed, the sound coming from the back of his throat. She knew his eyes would soon ignite red, ablaze with hunger—for her.

She was glad for the blue nearly-there dress she’d worn. Perhaps it was her lucky charm, one she would treasure forever. More than likely, it had nothing to do with it; they were fated. Yes, she agreed, it was her beautiful destiny to lay in his arms, a cosmic gift she’d never be able to repay.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

His hands trailed down her hips toward her back. “For?”

“You,” she mumbled.

His eyes sparked moments before he placed his hand on the back of her neck and met her lips again, forcefully spreading her mouth open with his tongue and delving in with reckless abandonment. The kiss was hungry, passionate, so unlike the other. She couldn’t decide which she preferred.

She would soon be lost, lost in him, but worries of her inexperience assailed her, and she pulled away.

“What’s wrong, darling?” he asked. The fire in his eyes, his desire, ebbed with concern. “We don’t have to do—”

“It’s not that. I want to…I just…I don’t know if I’m good at this…I’ve never…”

“You are plenty good, darling. You just don’t know it.”

He kissed her again, a soft, comforting kiss. Running his hands down her back, he cupped the underside of her derrière. Lost in his kiss, she barely recalled when her weight was no longer on her feet. He’d lifted her effortlessly, and she willingly straddled him. Her dress hiked up. The cool air hit her now bare backside briefly before his hands covered her.

Groaning, he tore himself away to say, “Liv, please tell me you weren’t out without underwear.”

Immediately, she covered his lips with hers, her arms encasing him, holding on for dear life.

Breaking away from the kiss, he muttered, “Liv.” An attempt to question her again, or scold her, but lost in the moment, it lacked the strict tone. It came out heated and hungry and only made her need unbearable.

Her heart drummed louder in sync with his when his hand crawled down her breast and clutched her lightly. She moaned, the sound deep, heated, startling her.

“Darling, I need you,” he rasped against her ear.

Her back hitting a soft surface, he continued to taunt her with his tongue, running it along her neck toward her chest then suddenly he was gone.

Her eyes snapped open landing on his, swarming in red.
What a sight
, she thought, realizing then he’d materialized them in her room.

She watched him as he slowly rid her of her dress then her thong. The relief she’d worn one was palpable in his crimson eyes. Tossing her clothes aside, he stood tense, muscles bulging, hands in fists at his sides, eyes hungry trailing every inch of her body, taking his fill.

She couldn’t help it. Under his intent gaze, her face flushed, wondering if he liked what he saw. Despite the insecure thought, she fought to keep still, to let him see her, all of her for as long as he wanted.

He murmured in Latin allowing her to catch a glimpse of his protruding fangs.

After minutes without a caress, his gaze shot toward hers. “You’re the most beautiful woman in the world, Liv,” he said. Those red eyes riddled with blatant desire.

She sighed, relieved.

Removing his shirt then jeans, he only left his tented boxers. Her eyes widened. He was big, bigger than she’d thought any man could be. Would he fit her? Would he get any pleasure at all? Panicked, her breaths grew rapid.

As if reading her mind, he assured, “I won’t hurt you, darling. I can’t.”

She nodded, still unable to mask her worry.

He moved, hovering over her body. His hands glided up and down her chest then he pressed his mouth over her nipple, sucking and tugging lightly.

Pleasure searing and daunting overwhelmed her, so she couldn’t help but arch her back and moan in desire. Raking her fingers through his short-cropped hair, she held him to her, never wanting him to stop.

He moved to her other breast, paying it as much attention as the first, kissing and caressing softly. Her breaths grew so rapid she was gasping. His hands trailed toward her core. One soft touch and a shot of pleasure rippled through her, making her ache. Her body tensed as a moan slid out of her lips. His tongue wandered lower and lower, licking his way toward her moist center. One flick, then two as his fingers rubbed her.

She wanted to scream, wanted to encourage him, hold him, pleasure him, but she couldn’t speak. All she could do was feel the ecstasy he created so magically inside her.

His tongue’s strokes continued, driving her toward a steep cliff of pleasure. With each, her moans became louder and louder, drowning out her pounding heart.

Then he slid a finger into her. Her hips bucked, her body trembling uncontrollably. An explosion of passion, wave after wave of pleasure ascended her and wouldn’t stop.

She felt the aftershocks long after his arms went around her shoulders, and he silenced her moans with a gut-wrenching, searing kiss.

Still trembling in his arms, aching from her mind-shattering orgasm and desiring more, she rasped, “I…”

“Your eyes are beautifully glowing, darling,” he whispered against her lips.

She didn’t know how he could tell. Her eyes were at half-mast, and heavy-lidded. “I need you…” she managed finally.

The muscles in his shoulders tensed. “Maybe we should—”

Her arms, wrapped around his neck, clutched him to her. “No, I need you now.” She’d waited over a century for him and wouldn’t let him get away now.

His eyes darkened, his expression hardening. His shaft throbbed against her stomach, so she knew he wanted her, all of her, but he battled with himself, his desire and honor. Wanting to help him make up his mind, wanting to pleasure him as he pleasured her, she kissed him. When he groaned into her mouth, she knew desire had won.

His jaw clenched, eyes ablaze, he removed his boxers. Hovering over her, he fisted his shaft then positioned himself at her core. He slid into her slowly, stretching her.

She thought it would have been different, painful even, especially the first time, but all she felt was pleasure, overwhelming pleasure, so much so her nails dug into his shoulders, a loud moan escaped her lips. Immediately, he stilled. When he did, her gaze shot to his.

His face was flushed, holding his breath. His eyes lingered over her, deadly and fierce. “Does it hurt?” he croaked.

“No…it feels…you feel…amazing,” she whispered, then lifted her hips to meet his, taking more of him inside her.

His eyes widened. He moaned then slid out and back in slowly. Placing his lips against hers, he kissed her as he continued to withdraw and thrust into her again. The muscles in his shoulders tightened and flexed with every thrust. As he’d done before, he increased his pace, the intensity of his kiss heightening, matching his deep thrusts. Several more and she was where she’d been before, near the edge.

Suddenly, it overwhelmed her, another beautiful mind-blowing orgasm. When she thought it couldn’t get more intense, that same intense pleasure radiated into her, leaving her breathless as wave after wave rippled through her. Her arms tightening around him, it was all she could do—make sure he didn’t let her go.

Chapter 20

Two weeks ago

Twilight was beautiful in Northern New York. As the sun receded, the sky became a rainbow of colors above the plethora of trees and land. The temperature had dropped slightly. Olivia loved it, all of it. The reason, around this time every day, she went for a stroll in her garden. Her mind as of late filled with thoughts of Cain. She knew why and tried her hardest to fight it. It had her contemplating another run.

But she couldn’t. Since Jocelyn had been attacked at the estate, Landon refused to allow her to run unaccompanied at night. It seemed like it had been ages since then. She didn’t care much for company on her runs. It was her time to enjoy, and being accompanied would ruin the feeling of utter freedom.

“Liv,” his voice resounded behind her.

She hesitated, attempting to control the thundering of her heart before she confronted him. Finally, she turned to face him. Her heart clenched in her chest, struck once again by his handsome features. Every day she fell in love with him a little more.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

Of course, he sensed her disillusion. He was an empath. It was useless even to try to hide anything from him, or any demon for that matter.

He had to know she was in love with him. The thought distressed her more. Did he pity her foolish feelings for a man she could never have? Was that the reason he came to see her every day?

Drawing a step closer, he said, “Liv?”

She lifted her chin, a poor attempt to act confident, then lied, “I’m fine.”

Avoiding his stare, she strode toward him and took a seat on the bench surrounded by calla lilies.

“Mind if I join you?”

A dry, humorless laugh bubbled from her. “Of course, Cain. Why would you need to ask?”

After a moment, he sat beside her, not too close, and released a breath, then he said, “You don’t seem to want company.”

His somber voice made her head snap to face him. It wasn’t like him.

“Don’t tell me my awful mood has rubbed off on you,” she said with a smile, her best attempt to jest and lighten his mood. “I’ll have to kick you out.”

He laughed, but like hers moments before it held no humor.

She lifted her head and admired the stars. From the corner of her eye, she realized he’d done the same.

“What do you want most in the world?” he asked, surprising her.

Shifting her attention to him, her eyes sought his. Just in time, he turned looking her way, waiting for her response. With that one somber look, she realized the glimmer always present had dimmed.

You
, she thought in response to his question, but left the word unsaid, wondering exactly what to say.

Looking away from him, she whispered, “To be loved, truly loved by a man.” Before he could comment on it, she turned the tables on him. “What do you want most in the world?”

****

“What do you want most in the world?”

You
, he thought but left the truth unsaid.

What could he say? He wanted to seek shelter in her arms and comfort in her touch. He wanted to come home to her face, her smile—her. He wanted her barefoot and pregnant with life they created growing inside her. He wanted her to love him so much she couldn’t fathom living and breathing without him. He was already there.

“I want a lot of things, too many,” he finally said.

A cop-out, so the moment he’d spoken the words, he regretted them. He needed her to trust him, but his situation made it difficult. He couldn’t tell her the truth, only a version of it without revealing too many details.

“I want my fated to love me,” he said it so simply.

He hoped she would respond. More than anything he wanted her to ask him if he’d found his. Because he knew if she did, he’d never be able to lie and, finally, she’d know. He waited for her to say something, but she never did, so he found himself gazing at the stars praying he could magically cure her sadness.

He didn’t get his wish, but he did sit with her for hours. He didn’t speak, only listened to the sounds of their breaths, wishing for more.

It was inevitable to want more, more of her, all of her, but for now, sitting in the dark, gazing at the stars was enough.

Chapter 21

His Olivia was heaven, a well of desire and unforgettable ecstasy: her taste so sweet, her skin so soft, her warmth so gratifying. Every moan she uttered was sweet surrender, surrender to him.

The moments of passion with Olivia were gone, but his mind refused to give them up. Relishing her lush body beneath his, her breaths at his neck, he couldn’t force himself to move, couldn’t force himself to stop reliving the moment. Catching his breath, he recalled their first time as a true defining moment in his life, a glimpse of what their lives would entail together. Bliss, true unhindered bliss, bliss beyond anything he’d ever experienced.

His mate clutched him still, her arms around him, her nails digging into his back as if she feared he’d disappear. After having waited so long, it was excruciatingly gratifying.

He couldn’t blame her. He was doing the same, one arm around her waist the other around her neck, holding onto her, vowing he’d never leave her.

It had been well worth the wait, the torment and the pain, the anguish of watching her live without him because now she was his to guard, protect and love endlessly.

He placed his lips over her neck, the spot he’d imagined marking. His gums still ached, throbbing with the unbearable desire to claim her. Perhaps, lingering over the spot he wanted to mark wasn’t a smart thing to do. It would only succeed in reminding him what he so desperately craved. Except he wouldn’t because he understood how much her brother meant to her, because he knew she wanted his blessing.

His eyes fluttered closed. He buried his face in her neck and inhaled her scent, remembering the sweet sound of her moans with every touch, with every flick of his tongue and with every thrust allowing him to sink deeper and deeper into her.

A nasty thought then reared its head. He’d been out of his mind with desire, with need. He’d tried to be gentle, as gentle as he’d promised, but had he? Were her nails digging into him in pain instead of passion?

He pulled away from her quickly to stare into her sea-blue eyes. She looked like an angel with her swollen kissed lips. Her dark brown hair fanned around her like a halo, except for the
tears
spilling from her eyes.

His worst fear confirmed. He’d hurt her. He’d been too rough, too demanding of her virgin body. It should have been perfect for both of them, not just him. He’d never forgive himself.