Avra's God (30 page)

Cisco reached across the coffee table and
connected palms with Kallie. “Let’s hear it for Jesus and not being
whacked.”

Avra scrambled off the couch and nearly
knocked Kallie over with her hug. “I’m so happy, Kal!” Tears
glistened in her eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“I didn’t know it would be important to
anyone but me.” She grinned. “Guess I was wrong, huh? Anyway,
thanks for helping me.”

Jesse felt like he’d been run over by a
Hummer. Nothing from Kallie for six months, then she dumps God on
him.

Cisco jabbed him in the ribs with an elbow.
“Say congratulations, Jess. Be polite.”

Jesse laughed. “I remember the last time you
told me to be polite.”

Cisco grinned smugly. “That turned out pretty
dang good.”

“Happy for you, Kal.” He crossed the room,
reached for her shoulders, and pulled her toward him. He smelled
summer rain. “You’re making me think about things more than I want.
Like always.”

The door closed behind Jesse and Cisco.
Kallie bent to gather the discarded paper plates and cups. She
barely held it together. Jesse hugged her, the songs rushing around
them like seawater.

“What made you spill tonight?” Avra still had
a smile on her face.

“I haven’t been within a hundred yards of
Jesse in months, much less talked to him. But when just the four of
us were left tonight, I couldn’t help remembering that night. And I
owed it to you guys to let you know you helped me.”

“This is better than if Cisco had gone ahead
and kissed me tonight.”

“Why didn’t he?”

“He hasn’t said it, but I know he’s waiting
for me to make the first move.”

“So, make it.”

Avra looked at the black garbage bag in her
hands. “What if he cheats again?”

“Yeah, I get what you’re saying.” She tossed
a two-liter bottle into the bag Avra held open. “I fell for a
player too. I wish I hadn’t seen Jesse tonight. I’m going to have
to exorcize him from my system all over again ... let’s move to
Miami.”

“What?”

“I could try to reconcile with my dad.”

“You’re running from Jesse.”

She choked up. “I have to.”

“
Pray. Ask God what
he
wants you to do.”

“What if he tells me you have to move to
Miami with me?”

“Not happening.”

Her shoulders slumped. “Yeah, I think Cisco
really loves you this time.”

The New Smyrna Beach High bell rang, and
Avra’s last class of student-teaching kids clambered out the door.
She rubbed her temples.

Her cousin, Rachel, breezed in, a whistle
strung around her neck on a lanyard. “Hey. Rough day with the
freshmen, huh? Should have majored in P.E. like I told you.”

“Would you marry a guy who wasn’t a
virgin?”

Rachel sobered. Her gaze went out the window
toward the coconut palms that slouched against an afternoon squall.
A pained look flashed across her face.

What was that about?

“Marry Morgan, if that’s—”

“Be serious. I’m not marrying Morgan.”

Rachel swished the eraser across the board,
removing a swath of numbers and letters. “God gives us a clean
slate. But the past is still there.”

“What if God meant for me to end up with
someone else? Maybe I fell for the wrong guy and I just can’t undo
the feelings.” Avra stood and pulled her purse out of the desk
drawer. She picked up the teacher’s edition of Algebra I. “I
thought it was a small thing, going out with someone who didn’t
share my faith. But it wasn’t.”

The dark look crossed Rachel’s face again,
but Avra knew better than to dig. Rachel would spill if and when
she wanted.

“I want to be certain this time that I’m
obeying God.”

Rachel erased the rest of the board. “What if
Cisco is the one for you, but you went out with him too soon?”

“You mean, I could have avoided getting
cheated on if I’d just waited for the green light from God?”

“I mean, maybe Cisco is the right guy.”

Jesse pressed
Send
on the Daytona
State College library computer. What was the use? Kallie had talked
to him last week at Avra’s, but she didn’t answer his e-mails or
voice mails. He wouldn’t be surprised if she blocked him. He’d have
to go by her house.

Kallie passed between the library security
posts and dumped her books onto an empty table. Jesse’s spine
connected with the hard plastic chair back.

She slipped into a seat and flipped open a
textbook.

He bee-lined toward her. “Hey, Kal.” He sat
across from her.

“Hi.”She glanced at her watch. “I have to go
soon.” She lowered her eyes to the carpet, where a paper wad lay
beside the trashcan.

“You still have that neon green dress?”

Her eyes went to his.

“Want to wear it again? Go to the graduation
after party with me.”
Please.

Her eyes registered surprise. “You don’t
dance.”

“Teach me.”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

Don’t shut me down, I’m begging you.
“Look, the dress can say ‘friends,’ like it did at Fall Fling.”

“No.”

“Are you going with someone else?”

“It’s just a bad idea.”

He clamped down on the inside of his cheek
with his teeth. “I’m sick to death of your good-bye-forever in
Denny’s.”

She shut the textbook and placed the notebook
on top of the stack.

He stood and moved to her elbow. “Don’t
bother. I’ll leave.”

“I’m moving back to Miami. It really
is
good-bye-forever this time.”

Jesse stared at her, feeling the shock course
through his body, the blood drain from his face.

He bent beside her, his lips close to her
ear, his hand against the back of her head. He breathed in the
scent of rain. “Don’t count on it.”

All the air emptied from Kallie’s lungs.

Jesse strode across the library and slammed
the push bar by the exit door too hard, making heads jerk up.

Her whole body quivered. No matter how she
fortified herself, his touch unnerved her.

Jesse opened the door to the darkened shed
where he and Kallie had spent so many Saturdays. He’d used every
ploy to hear her voice, throaty sandpaper sweetness like the
sapodillas Mom raised in his yard.

Kallie moving. Gone. Everything in him
screamed
no!
He smacked the attic floor so hard the heel of
his hand ached.

His chin dropped toward his chest. Light from
the bulb in the roof picked up a long, blonde hair clinging to his
navy Daytona State College T-shirt.
I love her.
The thought
flashed through him, leaving him shaken. He lay back on the floor
letting the truth soak in.

In some unmistakable way, Kallie was his and
he was hers. It had been that way from the beginning, a connection
that defied explanation. She felt it too. That’s what Denny’s had
been all about.

He rolled his head to the side and his eye
caught on something white where the floor boards stopped short of
the roof. He crawled over to look. A Skechers’ shoe box had been
tucked almost completely under the flooring. He pulled it out and
lifted the lid. A piece of paper folded into eighths lay inside. He
shook the sandy dirt off the paper and unfolded it.

The copy of “
Neon Green
” he’d given
Kallie.

He didn’t know what she was thinking when she
stashed the song here, but it couldn’t have been good.

It was time to win Kallie. She had enough
issues for a sorority full of girls, and nobody knew better than he
did. But she was a winnable war. Good-bye forever? Not if he could
help it.

Hello, forever
.

Jesse dug into his home fries. So far Dad’s
campaign to become a better father was pretty sweet—breakfast once
a week and occasional e-mails following up on things they
discussed.

“How’s your music coming, now that you’re
bandless?”

Jesse grinned. “Writing a song for a
girl.”

“Oh?”

“I’m going to get this one, or die
trying.”

Dad smiled. “Sorry, you’re on your own.”

Jesse downed the last of his omelet.
“Actually, I could use some help.”

Dad held up his hands. “Don’t look at me.
It’s a miracle your mother even went out with me.”

“Actually, I’ve put some thought into this.
You counsel people all the time.”

“Not on how to get a girl.”

“All my life I’ve heard people at church say
talking to you helped them with whatever. Kallie is making noises
about moving to Miami. I think she’s running from me because she’s
got issues with her father. If I can convince her to call you, will
you counsel her?”

“What about the free counseling up at the
college?”

Jesse grabbed the back of his neck. “Have you
ever had an idea that comes out of nowhere? It’s a really good
idea, and you know you didn’t think it up yourself?”

“That’s how I’d describe the times when God
speaks to me.”

Jesse leaned forward. “Really? That’s
bizarre. I’ve had this happen twice with Kallie, the most recent
was to urge her to go to you for counseling. I didn’t think God and
I were on speaking terms.”

“Maybe He’s on speaking terms with you, but
you haven’t been paying attention.”

“If that’s the case, when I suggest the idea
to Kallie, she’ll bite. Anyway, I wouldn’t trust Kallie to just
anybody.”

Dad chuckled. “You just made yourself a sale,
Son.”

Avra walked out of the restroom and along the
back wall of Ocean Center toward the bright lights of graduation.
Air conditioned air wafted against her skin. Her program slipped
from her hand and sailed to the floor beside the doorway into the
arena. She ducked in the shadows to pick it up.

As her hand connected with the paper, she
heard the rumble of Cisco’s low voice and a girl’s voice coming
from above her, around the corner.

Avra stilled. Their words drifted toward
her.

“Isabel, it’s never gonna work for us—ever. I
love Avra. I’ve always loved Avra. I can’t imagine not loving
her.”

“That’s how I feel about you.” There was a
plaintive note in Isabel’s voice. “I’ll wear you down like I did
last time—”

“I’m sorry,
chiquita
. My heart belongs
to God first, then to Avra. What we did was wrong. God’s forgiven
me. Ask Him to forgive you. He wants—”

Isabel’s disgust split the air with
Spanish.

Avra stood, stepped into the light, her chin
lifting a fraction.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I present the
graduates!” Prolonged applause, punctuated by shrill whistles,
framed the moment. Jesse leaned forward and grinned at Kallie,
three seats down. He warmed himself in her returning smile like
December sun.

Jedediah Turcott raced to the front of the
class, bowed to the stadium audience, and mooned their class. DS
had been painted in black letters across his baby-white bottom. The
class roared with laughter and exultation.

Jesse grabbed the mortarboard from his head
and sailed it high into the glaring lights of the arena. Cool air
connected with his sweaty scalp. Shouts and hats rained down around
him—the defining end of his glory years, Jed’s naked rump and all.
Jesse waded through the backslapping and handshaking, wanting it to
go on forever.

His father, flanked by his mother, Cal, and
Missy met him at the edge of the floor. He hugged his mother,
inhaling the scent of childhood, then spun Missy around while she
squealed.

“Good job, Son,” Dad said, shaking his hand
and pulling him into a hug.

The force of his father’s words dampened his
eyes and he hung on. “I’m talking to Kallie tonight—she doesn’t
know it yet.”

“I’ll pray for you.”

He released Dad. “I could sure use it.”

“I hope you get her, Jesse. I really like
this one.”

“She came for counseling and you didn’t tell
me?”

Dad smiled. “Three times.”

Jesse reached for Cal’s hand, his eyes on
Kallie parting from her mother and Aly.

Cal followed his gaze. “Congrats, Bro. And
hook me up with the hottie little sis, would ya.”

Jesse laughed. “If I marry Kallie, Aly will
be your sister.”

Cal blinked, momentarily stunned.
“In-law.”

“Thanks,” Jesse said to his family.
For
coming. For making me feel like I’m ready for whatever Kallie
throws at me.
He waved and headed toward Kallie, Cisco, Avra,
Billy, Kurt, and Drew, who leaned against the wall, waiting for the
crowd to thin.

He brushed against Kallie’s graduation gown
as he walked up.

Billy knocked knuckles with him.

Cisco grabbed him in a bear hug till Jesse
wondered if he’d ever breathe again.

More congratulations darted around the
group.

“Coming to Billy’s party?” Drew asked.

“Maybe later.” Jesse turned toward Kallie. “I
need to talk to you—alone.” Arena lights ex’d daggers across the
field of chairs behind her.

He grabbed the back of his neck and waited,
sweat forming in his armpits.

Avra walked close beside Cisco toward the
parking lot.

Waves crashed in the distance.

People filtered toward their cars in the
nearly empty parking lot.

Her eyes skimmed the palms lining the street
like sentries. Her hand was close enough to grab his. Her heart
quickened. But the tiniest capsule of doubt held.

He stopped and turned to face her, took a
step closer. He bent his arms to reach for her, then dropped them.
His old impatience flashed in his eyes and was chased away by
something pure and sweet she couldn’t name. “Avra, it’s graduation.
How long are you going to keep me hanging?”