Autumn Unlocked (Summer Unplugged) (5 page)

Chapter 9

The roar of dirt bike motors fill the air and make
s it hard to hear the story Ash tells Hana now, something about Team Yamaha. I glance sideways at my boyfriend, watching him watch the track in front of us.

“Hey,” I mumble as I squint to look at him with the setting sun blinding my vision.

“Hey,” he says back.

"
How was your lesson?"

He shrugs. "It was good, I guess."

I rest my chin in my hands and stare at the metal railing under my feet. I'd bet if you looked up the word
awkward
in the dictionary, it would show a picture of Jace and I sitting right here, right now.

"That was some exit you made earlier."
Jace's words aren't exactly mean, but they aren't exactly nice, either. I turn to look at him. He gives me a half smile and some of my anxiety melts away. Jace and I don't have fights and I'd really like to avoid having our first one at Mixon Motocross Park, in front of dozens of people on the bleachers.

"Yeah I know," I say, returning his half smile. "You could have told me she was your cousin, you know."

He shrugs. "I don't see why it matters."

My mouth falls open in disbelief. I have to suppress the urge to punch him. "If you don't know why it matters,
Jace Adams, then there is something wrong with your head."

He grabs the finger I had unknowingly pointed at him. His fingers wrap around it, pulling it closer to his chest. "It doesn't matter if my client is my cousin or not. I am in love with you and no one else matters." He pulls my hand into his and brings it to his lips. "
But it was fun watching you get so upset," he says right before he kisses the back of my hand.

My eyebrows draw together. "Thanks, asshole."

He laughs and this time I do punch him, but in a playful way.  Hana and Ash stand up from the bleachers, lost in their own conversation. Jace tells them bye and they wave before heading to the concession stand.

When they are out of earshot, I lean over and let my head rest on
Jace's shoulder. "Why didn't you just tell me that she was your cousin when she walked into your office and then we could have avoided this whole thing? Why didn't you run after me and explain things?"

He shrugs and my head bobs up and down with this shoulder. "You needed time to cool off. And I needed time to think about the fact that my girlfriend is crazy jealous."

I lift my head and look at him. "I am not crazy jealous."

He gives me a sneaky grin and kisses my forehead. "Like I said,
it's fun watching you get upset."

"Oh my god," I say while shaking my head. "I am going to kill you."

"Aww, shucks," he says. "You don't really mean you want to kill me."

"Maybe not kill, but… I would like to do bad things to you."

He hops off the bleachers and sticks his tongue out at me. "Let's get out of here and then you can ‘kill me’ all you want."

Chapter 10

The words are on the edge of my tongue, holding on for dear life and refusing to let go.
Jace cuddles up against me, all wrapped up in the stupid television show and completely unaware of the mental war going on in my head. All I have to do is tell him. Just tell him that I want to have sex and he would be thrilled and life could go on for both of us, sex-filled and wonderful.

But of all the times in the world for me to suddenly get shy, my personality
chooses this time. I nuzzle against his chest, closing my eyes and trying to memorize every second of this time with him. Because after tonight, I’ll go back to sleeping alone in my own bed again. Talk about torture.

Mom has only called me once since I arrived yesterday and it was just to make sure I wasn’t dead. I sent her a text this morning and again this afternoon telling her I was still alive and having fun and all I got back from her was a one word reply:
okay
. That’s so freaking weird and out of character for her. Maybe all Mom needed for the past few years was a man in her life, someone to make her happy and take her mind off the stress of working and raising two kids. My dad left before Bentley was born, leaving nothing but a stack of bills behind him. No note, no reason why, and definitely no kiss on the forehead.

Mom paid the bills, worked her ass off and always kept her head up, acting as if dads left all the time and it wasn’t a big deal. I knew she cried in bed at night when she thought we couldn’t hear her. A pang of guilt hits me, making my chest tighten. I shouldn’t have treated her so shitty over the last couple of years. All she did was try to protect me from dating that loser Ian, and all I did was rebel against her.

“You’re doing it again,” Jace whispers in my ear. I look sideways at him and lift an eyebrow. “You’re thinking really hard about something.”

I smile. “It’s not about you. I was just thinking about Mom and how it’s so weird that she has a boyfriend now. I mean, I guess you could call that a boyfriend.
They were already sleeping together. How long do adults wait before they have sex?”

Jace
shrugs. “I would hope he’s not a one night stand, but who knows. You should be happy for your mom. She deserves someone to make her happy.”

“How long should we wait?” I gasp right after the words come out of my mouth. Holy crap, I can’t believe I finally said it.

Jace answers without skipping a beat. “Until you’re comfortable. I’ve been ready,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

My heart thuds so quickly in my chest, I fear he’s going to hear it. But I’ve already started the topic that I’ve been dying to talk about, so I’d be an idiot of I didn’t finish it. “
Jace, I am ready.”

A palpable excitement fills the air as
Jace contemplates the weight of what I just said. He takes the remote and turns off the television then shifts on his side to face me. The embarrassed and excited smile on my face is so freaking awkward, but I don’t turn away. Not even when he cups my face in his hands and I feel my cheeks blush under them. I am ready and he needs to know that I want to give my all to him.

“Tonight?” he whispers, his eyes staring deeply into mine.

I swallow. Then nod.

Something shifts in his mood, an uncertainty or—oh god, doubt?—flickers across his face after I give him the green light for having sex tonight. My insides shrivel up and explode into painful embarrassment. I finally
get the courage to tell him and he doesn't even want to have sex with me!

"What?" I say, a little more defensive sounding than warranted.

He gnaws on his bottom lip. "Well…what I need to say…I, uh…"

Panic and about fifty horrible ideas of what he could say next fill my mind, causing me to burst out with a hurried, "Just freaking
tell me, oh my god."

He drags his hand over his face. "Would you be pissed if I already had condoms?"

"Huh?"

The question strikes me as weird at first, because he's the guy and he should have condoms and why the hell would I be mad about that and oh—
oh
. Okay. He already had condoms. That's why I should be mad. I mean, we haven't yet had sex in our several months of dating and he has condoms, presumably in the nightstand drawer because that's where he keeps flicking his gaze.

And they're probably condoms from sexual exploits with another girl—a prettier girl, a better girl than I am. And now he finally won over his new girlfriend enough to do the deed so he'll just cock an eyebrow and flash that cute smile and ask if it's okay
if he uses
another relationship's
leftovers for our first time.

"Okay, whatever is going on in your head is wrong,"
Jace says with a small chuckle. "Gosh, your face is adorable when you're internally freaking out."

"What am I supposed to think about this?" I ask in frustration.

He leans over me and pulls open the nightstand drawer, taking out an unopened box of condoms. He shakes the box like a maraca to prove his point. "They're unopened. I bought a box a few weeks ago, you know, just in case."

"Why would I get pissed about that?" I ask. "It's much sexier than a guy wanting to jump my bones with no protection."

He shrugs. "I didn't want you thinking I was assuming we'd have sex, or I was pressuring you too soon by buying them, or—shit, I don't know." He runs a hand through his hair. It makes his bicep grow taunt and the sight of it sends a fire through my belly. "I don't want to screw up anything with you." His voice is resigned, hopeful and desperate all at the same time. "I love you so much, Bayleigh. And it sucks because it feels like everything I do or don't do has the potential to screw up this thing we have going on."

"This
thing
," I say with a roll of my eyes, "is perfect."

I move closer and nuzzle against his chest. He wraps his arm around me. "We both overthink everything way too much," he says.

"Yeah we do," I agree. I sit up and trace my finger from his collar bone to the elastic waistband of his boxers. "So why don't we stop thinking and start doing?"

A hunger fills his eyes as he
digs his hands into my sides and pulls me hard against him. "Yes ma'am," he whispers right before his fingers slide my shirt over my head.

Not wanting to be the only shirtless one in the room, I tug his shirt off and toss it to the floor. The movement is primal sends a rush down to my toes. A few passionate kisses later, and I'm down to my tiny black underwear while
Jace hovers over me, completely nude.

His biceps flex as he supports himself and I slide my hands over the smooth, hard surface of his arms and chest, taking in the sight of my gorgeous boyfriend. I am one lucky girl. I slide my hands around his back and squeeze him closer to me, feeling his hard bulge against my belly. He groans with pleasure and closes his eyes.

My heart pounds in my chest, exhilarated and ready. Jace slips a finger under the string of my panties, his eyes taking in the sight of me as he slowly pulls them off. Our eyes meet and my nerves melt away. Everything feels perfect when I am with him. The way he slides his calloused hands over my body, the way he takes in the sight of me makes it seem as if
he's
the lucky one, instead of the other way around.

My fingers lace around his neck and my legs part for him as he slides a strong arm round my waist, tugging me an inch off the bed.
I moan when his lips touch my neck, sending a euphoric feeling coursing through my veins. I gasp when he enters me, but it’s silenced by his moan of pleasure. Our eyes meet and I don't look away, not even when he says, "Damn, you're beautiful."

Chapter 11

“Wake up, beautiful.” Hearing Jace’s voice first thing in the morning would have been a perfect start to my Sunday, if only it was the first thing I heard. Instead, the ungodly loud, incessantly horrible chirping of his alarm clock was the first sound of the morning. It startled me out of a deep sleep and into a state of mild panic as I looked around, taking in my surroundings and wondering where the hell I was.

A few seconds and one
wake up, beautiful
later, I remembered where I was, who I was with and what we had done last night. I yawn and stretch my arms above my head until they touch the headboard behind me. “Hey there, handsome.”

Jace
is out of bed, his boxers covered with clothes for the day. He hovers over me and kisses me on the lips, upside-down.

“You need a new alarm clock,” I say, squishing my face in disapproval. “That thing is
awful. It sounds like a dying animal.”

“It got us out of bed, didn’t it?” He frowns as I roll over and pull the pillow over my head. “Well, it got
me
out of bed.”

Hanging out at the motocross park on race day is drastically different than when it's just a practice day. Hundreds of people are here—racers, spectators, children and worried moms. And not to mention about two dozen girls who recognize
Jace and ask for an autograph.

I manage to reel in my jealousy while my boyfriend happily obliges to signing posters of himself for various smiling, star-struck faces. After all, he holds my hand the entire afternoon, only letting go when he absolutely has to. I know
it's lame, but it sure feels great to be the one who gets to hold his hand at a place where so many girls swoon over him.

JoJo
comes up to us between races, her blonde hair pulled back in a sweaty ponytail and a fine layer of dust covering her nose. This time she gives me a small smile before reaching out her hand to fist-bump Jace.

"You did really well in your first
moto," he says. “Now we have to do even better for the second one.” I try to pay attention to their conversation, but the motocross lingo is lost on me and soon I get bored and watch the races instead. While they're talking, Jace's phone beeps and he pulls it out of his back pocket.

I know it doesn't matter who texts him because he's allowed to have friends. But I can't help myself when I squint through my sunglasses to catch a peek at his phone. The screen shows one new text message from Sara. He glances at the screen and then shoves the phone back in his pocket without opening the message.

Sara? I've never heard that name before. Jealousy grabs a hold of me and my heartbeat quickens. I take a deep breath and tell myself to calm down. Sara could be another cousin for all I know. Plus he didn't even read the message, and if it was someone important, he'd have read it.

I absentmindedly wring my hands while
Jace and JoJo keep talking. I stare out at the track, pretending to watch the bikes as they zoom by, but really all I'm thinking about is that mysterious text message. No matter how many times I tell my brain to chill out and get over it, I'm still not chill and
so
not over it.

Jace's
fingers intertwine between my own, pulling my hand away from the other one. It almost feels like he saw me wringing my hands and decided to hold one of them to make me stop. Or maybe he's just holding my hand just to do it. Regardless, I look over and smile at him and he smiles back.

He leans in, his lips hovering just inches from my ear. He whispers, “Sara is the payroll person for
Mixon Motocross Park. She sends a text to everyone when our paycheck stubs are ready.”

I lift an eyebrow,
and then quickly cover it up, plastering a bored look on my face. “Okay, so?” I say, totally not as convincing as I should be.

He winks at me and wraps an arm around my waist.
“Just thought you should know.”

A warm content feeling falls over me as I gaze into my boyfriend’s eyes. I knew that text was nothing to worry about. I hope that with time—or, you know, no time—I’ll get to a point where things like that don’t bother me at all.

It's amazing how my attitude and perception can change—literally—overnight. Yesterday and for the past few months I've been dating Jace, I was a freaked out jealous rage monster anytime a girl so much as glanced in Jace's direction. I felt inadequate and unworthy to be dating someone of fame and talent and attractiveness. I felt like it'd only take one smile from a hotter, better girl to make him run away and leave me for her.

None of that is true. I know this, but it was nearly impossible to believe until today. I am not inadequate or unworthy. If
Jace thinks I'm hot then I'm hot, dammit. It doesn't matter what anyone else, or myself, thinks. And if Jace says he loves me, then he loves me. And love isn't just a four letter word to him. He wouldn't say it if he didn't mean it.

Jace
cocks an eyebrow curiously at me as he probably wonders what sorts of things are going on in my head. It's right about now that I realize I'm not just grinning a small, stupid grin. I'm full out smiling like a freaking clown. I force my lips to retreat from the sides of my face and form a more simple, coy smile.

I lift an eyebrow at
Jace, mocking him, and then grab his hand. My heart turns to mush when he squeezes it, a silent gesture telling me he loves me. I squeeze back—a silent
I love you, too.