Anything Less Than Everything (16 page)

But what he
said still meant something.
I decided. someone would have to be really
special before I shared this place with them.
I turned to face him, to
really
look at him. “Thank you for bringing me here,” I said.

“Well, you’re
pretty special,” he said.

“Think so?”

“Of course.
You’re my Brooke.” He smiled my half smile.

I followed
him into the sort of shade where he spread out a blanket for us. He lay on his
back, one arm thrown across his face to shield it from the sun. I flopped
beside him on my stomach.

“So I have a
question,” I said with mock importance.

“A question?”
He kept his arm over his face, so I couldn’t see his expression.

“Yes. A
very
important
question.”

“Ah,” he
said, catching on. “By all means, ask away.”

The fact was,
I didn’t have a question prepared, but I felt the need to steer things back to
what we knew, away from this weirdness. I thought quickly. “Who would you want
to play you in a movie about your life?”

Now he looked
at me. “That is so not fair.”

“Why not? I
thought I could ask you anything.” I gave him a fake pout. He sighed and sat up
on his elbows.

“Yes, but
there is no way to answer this question without--never mind. You’re right.” He
stopped and thought for a minute. When he finally answered, it came out of
nowhere. “Jed McCasland.”

“Jed
McCasland?”

“What? You
had someone better in mind?” He was getting a little defensive, which was too
funny.

“Not necessarily,”
I said. “I just didn’t see that coming.” Jed McCasland was one of those actors
who’d been around forever, acted in every type of movie possible, but never
seemed to get older. His fame crossed generations. “Why him?”

“I don’t
know,” he said with a shrug. “He just seems to be able to play any role.” I
rolled onto my back beside him. “What about you?”

“Who would I
pick to play me?” I asked.

“No. Who
would you cast as me.” Now this really wasn’t fair. I had not expected him to
turn my question on me like that, even though he often did. I thought.

“Well not Jed
McCasland. I love a good eighties movie as much as the next girl, but he’s a
little too brooding for you. And short.”

“Okay,” he
said. “Who then?”

I thought for
a second, tapping my finger against my mouth. “Jonah Blaiseman.”

“Really.”

“What?” I
asked, shocked. “He’s tall and has dark hair and light eyes. He’d have to bulk
up quite a bit, of course. You should be honored, anyway. He
is
the
reigning Sexiest Man Alive.”

“Oh, well
then that changes things,” he said, playfully bumping my shoulder.

He checked
the time on his phone. “You about ready to head down? It’s easier than the
climb up, I promise.”

In the
parking lot, just before we reached his truck, he stopped and pulled me to him,
wrapping his arms around me and tucking my head under his chin. “In case I
haven’t told you, I’m really glad you’re here, Brooke.”

“Me, too,” I
said. And I was, but I couldn’t quite get that moment on the hill out of my
mind. Something happened. Or almost did. But he’d pulled away, ended it. I’m
not sure what I was hoping for, but something felt off, and that was something
I’d never experienced with Aaron. We had the perfect friendship, and now things
were getting weird, just like I feared. I must not have been doing as good a
job with keeping my feelings in check as I thought.

Aaron’s phone
rang on the drive back to his house. He spoke to whomever was on the other end,
an old high school buddy I guessed based on his end of the conversation. I was
glad we didn’t have to talk, and I hated that I felt that way.

“I’ll get
back to you and let you know,” he said before ending the call.

We pulled
into the driveway then, and he looked over at me. “Some of my friends are
having a cookout tonight. It’s fine if you don’t want to go. I mean, we can do
something else or--”

“No,” I
interrupted. “I mean, yes. That sounds like fun.”

“You’re sure?
You won’t know anyone there.”

“I’ll know
you, right?” Aaron smiled at me.

“You’re
incredible, you know that?”

“I try.” I
didn’t really want to be around a bunch of strangers, but it seemed more
appealing than being alone with Aaron at the moment. I didn’t trust myself.
Besides, I was not going to be the one who kept him from seeing old friends the
one weekend he was in town.

“What time should
I be ready?” I asked.

“A little
before six?”

“Perfect,” I
said.

I
was nervous. It was ridiculous, of
course, because it was just a barbecue with Aaron’s friends, but I was. Nothing
in my suitcase looked right, seemed appropriate. I wasn’t sure if they knew our
story, but if they did they probably thought Aaron was a little crazy for
claiming some girl from Tennessee that he never saw as his best friend. My
guess was that it was a very non-Aaron thing to do. It was a non-Brooke thing,
too, but whatever.

I finally
settled on my kelly green sundress and some pewter sandals. It seemed
appropriately casual, but still cute. I tried the same approach with my hair
and makeup, and was more or less happy with the results. I glanced at the time
on my phone: five forty-five. I spritzed my wrists with perfume, grabbed my
purse and headed downstairs.

Aaron was in
the kitchen with his parents. He looked up as I walked into the room and
greeted me with that half smile, the one I had decided was reserved only for
me. I smiled back, but couldn’t keep my nervousness out of it. His parents standing
there watching us only made it worse. Aaron stepped in and saved me.

“Dad,” he
said, “this is Brooke.” So that’s where he got his height. His dad, John, was
easily six-five. And though his hair was graying, it was obvious it had once
been dark like Aaron’s. Aaron’s features, though, were all Liz’s.

“Hi, Brooke!
Good to meet you.” I smiled in response and shook his outstretched hand.

“You, too,” I
said. “Thank you for having me.”

“Of course,
of course. So Aaron says you’re in town for a conference of some kind?”

“Yes, sir.
For English teachers. It starts on Sunday.” Making conversation was proving
difficult.

“Doesn’t seem
fair for a teacher to have to work in the summer,” he said.

“That’s what
I told her,” Aaron jumped in. “Which is why we should probably take advantage
of all the time we have for fun and get going.”

“You can’t go
yet, Aaron,” came a voice behind me. “You promised.” I turned to see Sara,
camera in hand. Aaron had mentioned that she was into photography, but I wasn’t
sure what that had to do with him.

“Does it have
to be today, sis? Brooke and I are headed over to Knox’s. I don’t want to be
late.”

“The lighting
is perfect, though,” she pleaded. “And if I don’t take the shots today, I might
not have time to edit and print them before class on Saturday.” Aaron sighed,
then looked at me.

“Is it okay
if I play model for Sara before we leave? It won’t take long--will it, sis?” Of
course there was no way I could say no, so we headed out to the (impeccably
landscaped) back yard.

“Okay,” Sara
said, taking control. “Sit here like this, and drape your arm on your knee.”
Aaron did as he was told, and I tried not to laugh at how uncomfortable he
looked. She snapped several pictures, having him change poses every so often.
Aaron played along, and was a great sport. You could tell he really cared about
her.

After about
fifteen minutes, Sara looked over at me nervously. I smiled my most inviting
smile, really wanting her to like mer. “Um,” she said, “would you mind maybe
getting in on a few shots? My assignment is to create a spread with models
posed as a couple.”

“Sure,” I
answered, my heart quickening at this thought. Some moments of closeness seemed
so natural for us, but others had led to the emergence of feelings I was trying
hard to get over. “Where do you want me?”

“Let’s get a
few here. Just sit down kind of in front of Aaron.” I sat down with my legs
tucked to one side. “Yeah, like that. Okay, Aaron, you look at her, and Brooke,
you look this way.” We followed her instructions, and she snapped away.

Next she had
us move to Maggie’s swing set, and had us both sit on the swing.
Oh. My.
Goodness.
From there we moved to the fountain on the patio, then to just in
front of a flower bed.

“Hey, Sara.
Why don’t you get a few of just Brooke? You know, since you took all those of
me by myself.” I shot him a fake-annoyed look, knowing what he was really up
to. He just smiled and discreetly winked at me.

Having the
camera directed on me with Aaron watching made me incredibly self-conscious,
but I played along and was a good sport for Sara. She’d been less than cordial
to me since we met, and I really wanted to win her over. Even more than his
buddies or teammates or parents, I was most concerned about how Aaron’s sisters
felt about me. They were quite possibly the only two people who ranked above me
on his list, and I didn’t want them hating me.

“Okay,” Aaron
broke in. “My stomach is declaring this photo shoot a wrap. I’m starving.” Sara
rolled her eyes at him, but he just pulled her into a hug in response.

“These look
really good,” she said, flipping through the images on her camera. “I’m going
to start editing them.” She started to walk off, then turned toward me and
said, “Thanks for helping me.” She didn’t quite look at me when she said it,
but just the slightest bit of smile peeked through. Victory.

“So,” I said,
“what exactly was Sara taking pictures for?” We were at a stop sign in his
neighborhood, and he was fiddling with the radio while he waited for traffic to
pass.

“Some
photography class she’s taking at the community college. They don’t offer it at
her school, so she’s doing this this summer trying to build a portfolio. She’s
afraid she won’t get into the best photojournalism programs if she hasn’t had
classroom experience.”

“Sounds like
she has a plan,” I said.

“Sara?
Always. She reminds me a lot of you, actually,” he said, looking over at me.

“Me? How?”

“She’s very
organized, very driven. And she knows exactly what she wants.” I was about to
protest that I didn’t have any clue what I wanted when I remembered the list. I
had known exactly what I wanted, all fifty-seven things. Sometimes knowing what
you want and getting what you want are very different things, though. I hoped
Sara wouldn’t have to find that out.

“I don’t
think she likes me very much,” I said without realizing it. I regretted it
instantly, but Aaron was unfazed.

“Sara
is...very protective of me. Of her time with me.” He was quiet for a few
seconds, like he was debating whether or not to say more. Finally he said, “She
remembers very well how much I was hurt...before.” I nodded. Talking about exes
was one thing over the phone, but it seemed weirder in person.

“But we’re
not like that,” I said. “And I would never hurt you.”

“I know, but
she’s sixteen, and everything is drama to her. She’ll come around.”

I hoped so. I
would just have to find a way to connect with her. Maybe later I’d ask to see
her pictures, to give us a talking point where she was the expert. That often
worked with my students. Maybe that was part of it, too. Maybe she saw me as a
teacher, not as someone who could be a friend.

I counted
twelve other people when we pulled up to Knox’s town home complex a few minutes
later. Some appeared to be couples, but most were there alone. Aaron looked
over at me and read my feelings on my face. “You okay, Brooke?”

“Just
nervous.”

“Nervous? Of
these guys?” I nodded.

“You know how
I am around people I don’t know. I’m afraid they won’t like me.”

“You weren’t
that way with me,” he noted. “Besides, they will love you, and if they don’t,
well, you’re more important to me than they are.” With that he got out of the
car, carrying the boxes of Dr. Peppers we’d picked up along the way. I had no
choice but to follow him.

The guys
greeted Aaron warmly as he approached the patio of the common space where
someone, Knox I assumed, was grilling burgers and chicken. After some man hugs
and an offer of beer (which Aaron turned down; he was in training), Aaron
turned to me.

“Guys, this
is my friend Brooke.” They all smiled and said hello. It seemed genuine, like I
fit in. Two girls wandered up to us, one wearing the lowest cut tank top I’d
ever seen, eyeing me carefully. Or glaring at me. It was hard to tell. Aaron
had left to put the drinks in a cooler, which apparently gave tank girl the
opportunity she was waiting for.

“Hi,” she
said, a little too cheerfully. “I’m Ashton.”

“Brooke,” I
said. Something about her posture, her facial expressions, and the fact that
she had a hanger-on made me wary.

“It’s so good
to see all these guys again,” she purred. “Aaron is looking especially fine,
don’t you think, Tasha?” Tasha was the aforementioned hanger-on. She nodded
vigorously, smiling. I just smiled politely. I was pretty certain she was
trying to get under my skin, and my experience with those types told me it was
best to ignore them.

            “We
dated in high school, you know.” It took me a second to realize she meant Aaron
and her. Her smile was so catty, but I knew she was looking for a reaction, so
I refused to give one.

“Oh?” I said
nonchalantly. “He never mentioned it.” Her smile froze in place. Score one for
Brooke.

“Well,” she
said, recovering. “How long have you two been together?” Now it was my turn to
freeze. She thought we were a couple. Interesting. That explained the
cattiness, but it also explained why she approached me. She wanted to know what
kind of claim I had on Aaron, to size up the competition. Part of me wanted to
play along, to keep her away from him for his own good, but I knew I’d end up
looking like an idiot when the truth came out in the end. I looked around for
Aaron and met his gaze. He smiled at me. I really wished he would come over to
bail me out, but it looked like I was on my own.

“Actually,” I
said. “Aaron and I aren’t dating. We’re just friends.” The initial look of
surprise on her face quickly changed to triumph.

“Oh, I should
have realized that,” she said. Lots of names for this girl flew through my
head. I settled on one. “Well, lovely to meet you. I think I’ll go circulate
some more. Tasha?” Tasha jumped up like a puppy, ready to follow.

Ashton made a
beeline for Aaron, feeling secure in his singleness. I wanted to go to him, to
save him from her, but I knew that would look pathetic. Besides, I had no claim
on him, as Ashton had made perfectly clear. He was smart, and surely wouldn’t
fall for her, anyway, but if he did...well, he was a big boy.

I watched as
Ashton threw her arms around his neck, in full flirt mode. Aaron smiled, but it
was a polite smile, not a
“I’m-so-excited-to-see-you-again-after-all-this-time-let’s-get-back-together”
smile. She was talking animatedly, often touching his arm as she spoke.
Apparently, Aaron was saying something hilarious, because she threw her head
back in laughter. Tasha did whatever Ashton did, minus the arm touching.

This display
made me sick to my stomach. The fact that it was bothering me upset me even
more. I had no right to be jealous. Obviously whatever I had felt in those
shared moments on the hill was wishful thinking. I was reading too much into
his words. And glances.

I was
watching all of this pretty attentively, so I saw Aaron look around, stopping
when he found me, and I saw him politely disengage himself from the
conversation and walk over to where I was still standing, all alone like an
idiot.

“Hey,” he
said, handing me a can of Diet Coke. “I was on my way to bring you this when I
was held up.”

“I noticed.
Ashton seemed very happy to see you.” I tried to keep my voice even, but I
noticed a note of bitterness in it. Fortunately, Aaron didn’t.

“Yeah, she
usually is.” I wasn’t sure what this meant, but his face was pretty
expressionless, so I let it go.

“You hungry?”
he asked. I nodded. “Burger or chicken?”

“Burger,” I
answered. Aaron disappeared again, coming back a few minutes later with two
plates. Mine held a burger fixed just the way I liked it, his a chicken breast.
We sat on the low wall surrounding the patio as the rest of the group joined
us. Ashton happened to choose a seat right next to Aaron, of course.

Despite
having to witness her incessant flirting, it was a fun night. The rest of
Aaron’s friends were really cool, very similar to the people I hung out with in
high school and probably would have hung out with in college had it not been
for Spencer. Ugh. I had not thought of him in several days, and I really didn’t
want thoughts of him invading my time with Aaron.

As we got
ready to leave, an increasingly sloppy Ashton slipped her arm in Aaron’s,
batting her eyelashes at him. “It was sooo good to see you. It’s really been
too long.” Aaron smiled, so she continued. “How long are you in town for?”

“Only the weekend,”
he said. “Then back to school.”

“Well, she
said, here’s my number if you want to get together before you go.” She slipped
a piece of paper in his hand and walked away, looking back at him as she did.

Aaron stuffed
the paper in his pocket without looking at it, then turned to me. “Well, that
was interesting. You ready to go?” After all that, I was more than ready.