Another Chance (20 page)

Nose to nose now, Ian backed off when there was a noise behind him.

“Patrick.” He heard Cassie’s voice from behind. She ran to catch him. “What’s going on?” She asked, looking back and forwards between the two men.

“Just saying goodbye,” Ian said. He nodded. “Doctor Cross, it was good to see you.”

“Likewise,” Patrick replied.

With Ian gone, Cassie hugged Patrick tightly.

“I can’t believe you were leaving without saying goodbye. Thank you for everything.”

“You’re welcome. I thought you were busy enough with everyone else.” He watched over her shoulder as Ian walked back to the building.

“I will be glad to get home to some peace and quiet after all this.”

He kissed the top of her head. “Thank you for letting me be a part of your life again. I’m so glad I got to support you and Mark. He was a great guy.”

“He was, and he will leave a huge gap in my life. This is going to be the hard part, adjusting to him not being around.”

“You’ll get there, Cassie, it’ll take some time, but you’ll get there.”

She nodded. “It’s weird at the moment. Are you going back to Auckland?”

“I am, but I’m just on the other end of the phone if you need me.”

“Some time I might take you up on that, just to catch up.”

“I’ll look forward to it.” He released himself from her hug and leaned down to kiss her cheek.

“See you later.”

“Sure thing.”

She watched as he got into the car and drove into the distance. “Are we going to see him soon, Mum?” Sophie came up behind her.

“I don’t know, Soph. We need some time to ourselves for a little while.”

“He’ll be here for my birthday.”

Cassie spun to face her daughter. “You told him about your birthday?”

“Lauren likes him, I thought that he might start liking her too.”

She closed her eyes. Sophie was only trying to help her Aunt out.

“Sophie, if Patrick likes Lauren he’ll contact her. Let’s go back inside, we still have heaps of people to talk to, and then I am going home for a nap. I’m tired.” It worried Cassie though, she’d been pushing her luck lying to Patrick about Sophie’s age, and now he knew the truth.

For now she’d take Sophie home and try to adjust to life without Mark. Her heart ached at the thought of it. He left a huge gap in her life, in her heart, in her bed. The thought that he would never touch her again made her want to scream, but she held it in for the moment. When she got home and went for her nap she would have another cry and snuggle into his side of the bed, hoping for some sign of him.

Lauren stayed with them for a couple more days, she had her own memories to face returning to her childhood home where Mark had practically raised her. She swore off men for a while, but Cassie teased her that wouldn’t last for long.

Cassie knew she was in for a long slow recovery and as the first three months passed she relaxed about Patrick finding out about Sophie’s birthday. He didn’t make any move regarding custody, and she realised things might not be so bad after all. It had been hard having him around at first, but as soon as he and Mark became good friends she was happy to have him around. Mark became friends with everyone though. He had been that type of person.

“Have you heard from Patrick?” Lauren asked. Lauren had a crush on Patrick and Cassie and couldn’t blame him. After all these years, Patrick was still as hot as he had ever been. Tanned and toned from the sports he still played, he didn’t look much different from the time they were together. Cassie felt frumpy in comparison.

“I haven’t, but he told me he was going to let us get on with things for a while, adjust to life.”

“He is so sexy, Cassie. I can see why you were attracted to him all those years ago. To be honest, I was hoping he’d call me.”

“If you’re asking me why he hasn’t called you. I don’t know. He hasn’t called me either, and we’re old friends so I wouldn’t take it personally. You have had a lot to deal with too.”

“I’m lonely, Cassie. I miss my brother, and I don’t want to hook up with guys anymore. I want a good man who will be my partner like you and Mark were together. He loved you so much, and he would have done anything for you. That’s what I want. I’m thirty-five years old, Cassie, and I still want a baby of my own.” She looked so miserable, Cassie opened her arms, and Lauren went to her.

“You can’t rest your hopes on Patrick, he could even have a girlfriend.”

“I’m not. I thought he was nice. Do you know if he has any friends?”

Cassie almost laughed out loud, remembering Dave Pratt. “None that I know anymore. Even Patrick’s childhood friends wouldn’t be worthy of you Lauren. You deserve someone special, and I’m sure if there’s someone out there for you, you’ll find him. In the meantime, we can be alone together.”

Lauren laughed. “I can’t think of anyone I’d rather be alone with.”

“That’s better. Now lets neither of us rush into anything just for a companion.”

“Deal,” said Lauren, grinning.

“Deal. Want to open a bottle of wine?”

In her bedroom, Sophie had finished her latest email to Patrick. The emails had been flowing back and forwards since the funeral. She’d promised to tell Cassie they were talking to each other, but Sophie kept it to herself to avoid upsetting her mother. The emails had been regular, every day like clockwork, and he would ask how her day was, how school was going, tell her off if she was online too late and occasionally ask about Cassie.

Sophie told him how they were coping and how late at night when Cassie thought Sophie was asleep she would often hear her crying herself to sleep. It was something else she wouldn’t tell Cassie about though sometimes she would make an excuse and crawl into bed with her. Patrick had told her she was taking good care of her mother, and to contact him if she needed anything. Sophie had thought about asking him if he was her father but decided against it.

She was sure she could see the similarities between them, but her mother wasn’t talking, never had, and Mark had loved her as his own. The thought of him not being there to see her grow up tore into her whenever she thought about it like a new flesh wound, never entirely healing. It was also the reason she didn’t ask Cassie.

Her mother was still very much mourning the loss of the man she considered her soul mate and sometimes she would lose her temper for seemingly no reason. She would cry and hold Sophie tight, promising it would get better so Sophie kept to herself a lot of the time rather than upset Cassie further. Sophie could tell Patrick missed Cassie too.

Sighing, she stood up and prepared to go out to the kitchen where her mother was cooking dinner. It would be another silent night where they ate and, after watching television for a while would go to bed. Life was getting predictable. She could hear the laughter coming from the kitchen before she saw what was going on.

Lauren had arrived while Sophie had been in her room and Cassie was more animated than she had seen for a long time. In the twelve weeks since Mark's death, Cassie had barely smiled, but now the two women were crying with laughter over some shared joke. “What’s going on?” Sophie asked, “you two are acting weird.”

“We’ve decided that we don’t need men in our lives. Lauren and I are going to be single forever.”

“Have you two been drinking?” That was the only logical explanation to Sophie.

“We might have had a couple of drinks.” Lauren giggled when Cassie said the words straight faced, causing Cassie to lose her composure and spit wine all over the floor as she laughed. “Oh, Mum that’s gross.”

“It’s all right sweetheart, I’ll get a cloth.” Cassie grabbed a sponge from the bench and wiped the floor tiles. “All sorted.” She threw it in the bin when she was finished. “Happy?” She asked Sophie.

Sophie rolled her eyes. “Is dinner ready?”

“It sure is, come and help yourself.”

“You need something to eat, Mum.”

“I’m sure you’re right, Sophie. Let’s all sit down and have dinner together and then we’ll find a good old soppy movie to watch.”

Sophie hugged her mother. “That sounds good Mum.”

Lauren fell asleep on the couch and after the movie Cassie covered her with a blanket before going to bed. She lay there for a while, thinking about the last few months until her thoughts fell to Patrick. She wondered what he was doing, how he had been, and she dialled him before hanging up the phone. After taking a deep breath, she dialled again. “Are you going to talk to me this time?” he asked.

“I thought I dialled the wrong number.”

“Sure you did.”

She laughed. “I just thought I would say hello.”

“It’s pretty late.”

“I don’t even know what the time is. We watched a movie and Lauren fell asleep, and I’m all by myself.”

“Something tells me you’ve been drinking, Cassie.”

“I had some wines with Lauren. Why?”

“You’re calling me for starters. We haven’t spoken for three months. Then there’s the slurring of words.”

“I’m not slurring my words.”

“I will bet anything you can’t hear it, but I can. Anyway, what did I do to deserve this phone call? Are you horny, Cassie?” Her skin burned with embarrassment, all of a sudden unsure whether that was why she had called him or not. “Cassie?”

“I wondered how you were because you were round here all the time and now you’re not.” She managed to get the words out, but they all ran together, and for a moment she wondered if she’d really said them at all or if they had stayed inside her head.

“I’m fine. Miss you like crazy though.”

“You do?”

“Cassie, I’m keeping my distance because your loss is still so new and I need to have a conversation with you that you’re not ready for yet.”

She lay back on the bed and closed her eyes. “What do you want to say to me?”

“I told you, Cassie, you’re not ready for what I have to say. You’re never far from my thoughts.” Cassie sighed.

“Are you all right, Cassie?”

“I will be. I need to get some sleep.”

“This is your doctor telling you that’s a very good idea. Get your beauty sleep sweetheart, I’ll wait for your next call.”

“Patrick, thank you for everything. I appreciate you listening to me, even if I call you randomly like this.”

“I’m here whenever you need me to listen, even if you just want to call and not talk. I’ll sit and listen to you breathe anytime.” She laughed. “That’s better. You need more laughter in your life, Cassie. You’ll get there, hang in there. There are people out there who love you. A lot.”

“I know,” she whispered, “I miss him, that’s all.”

“Of course you do, it’s early days yet. Now, Cassandra, go to sleep and no bad dreams. You got it?”

“I got it. Thank you.”

“You already said that and you don’t need to. Talk to you again next time.”

He was grinning when he hung up the phone. She would be his again, and he’d make it work this time. Giving her space was hard, every part of him was itching to go to her and tell her how he felt, but it was too soon and if he did that he’d risk her pushing him away. He’d bide his time. She was worth the wait.

Cassie lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. She didn’t know why she’d had an impulse to call Patrick, but she did miss his companionship. He had been her rock when Mark had died, and all of a sudden he wasn’t there. The alcohol made her warm and giggly before her mood turned melancholy and she thought about how much she missed Mark’s touch. She clung to his pillow, though all scent of him was long gone and fell asleep, hoping to dream of him.

CHAPTER TWENTY

Sophie wanted a party for her twelfth birthday and Cassie reluctantly gave in to a sleepover with a few of the girls from her school. “Can we invite Patrick?”

“If that’s what you want,” Cassie said.

It was six months since Mark’s death and Cassie hadn’t spoken to Patrick since the night she had called him. It had been easier to keep her distance than face him. “Can I call him to invite him?”

“Sure sweetie, do you want to invite Lauren too? We’ll do pizza for dinner, and then you lot can watch a movie. I can get some popcorn and snacks and you can camp out in the living room.”

“That sounds great, Mum. Where’s your phone?”

Sophie was already getting Cassie’s mobile out of her handbag before Cassie had a chance to answer. “It’s in my bag, Soph.” She laughed.

Patrick grinned when he saw Cassie’s number come up. “Hey pretty lady,” he said as he answered. Sophie giggled. “Sophie? Is everything all right?”

“I’m calling to invite you to my birthday party next weekend. We’re having a sleepover.”

“Who’s having a sleepover?”

“I am, with some of my friends in the living room. You can come and stay in the spare room if you want. Lauren and Mum will be here.”

“How can I turn that lovely invitation down? Although I don’t know about being in a houseful of pre-teen girls.”

“You can hang out with us. Jessica wants to meet you.”