Animal Attraction (5 page)

“Did you dislike kissing me?”

I squirmed in my chair. “It was fine.” It had been the mere promise of more to come and it had stolen my breath.

“It would be easier for you if you’d come when we sent the letter. I’m sorry you didn’t have more time to come to terms with this, but you can’t hide from what you are. You won’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”

Sincerity vibrated in his voice and concern showed in his eyes. Funny, but that didn’t make me feel any better.

The door opened and I heard footsteps on the tile. The men, or Neuri I guessed I should think of them as, came in and formed a ring around us. That also didn’t fill me with warm fuzzies. Although it did fill me with a prickling of energy, like getting close to a transformer. I almost expected the air to hum.

“Welcome home, Chandra,” Zach said in more formal tones. “Tonight we’ll celebrate the return of our princess. Tomorrow night, you will take your place as our queen and choose your king.”

Nerveless fingers lost their grip on my cup. It shattered on the tile.

“WHAT? NO. I MEAN, I THINK YOU’RE ALL EXTREMELY HOT, BUT NO. Look, I’m sorry, but I’m not going to be your princess or your queen,” I croaked into the silence. “I have other plans. You’ll have to get another girl.”

Finding out I might grow fangs and fur under the next full moon was bad enough, but being told I had to pick a life partner from their group was a bit much.

“There aren’t any others.” Zach spoke in a soft voice, but there was a steely sound to it.

“Bullshit.” I stared at him, narrow eyed. “You can’t tell me all werewolves are members of the Y chromosome group.”

“Not all. Just most.” Zach gestured and the redhead who’d smiled at me went away. He came back a few seconds later with a dustpan and whisk broom and went to work cleaning up the breakage.

“Lycanthropy is like color blindness,” said a blond with blue eyes and a nice baritone. “Sex-linked. It affects more men than women.”

Biology class wasn’t so far in the past that I couldn’t follow him. Something like 12 percent of men were color blind. But it affected less than one-half of 1 percent of women.

I scrunched into my chair as understanding hit me, and tried not to feel like a target.

“You’re scaring her,” the redhead said. He swept up the last shard and winked at me. “We won’t bite you. Unless you’re into that.”

“Gee, how reassuring.” But despite my sarcasm, his humor did make my tension recede. Just a little. They weren’t falling on me like, well, a pack of wolves. Still, that didn’t mean I wanted to date them, singly or together, much less marry one.

En masse they made a stunning selection of gorgeous manhood. Healthy, young, virile. Some woman would appreciate them. Hell, I appreciated them. But it was hard not to lose sight of the fact that they wanted me for what I was, not who I was. Even if I did want to go wild with one of them and supposing I lost my head utterly and made a commitment, I wanted a man who wanted me for 
me
.

Although if they all kissed like Zach and David, it might be tempting to overlook that while I explored my options. I blinked the thought away and focused on more immediate concerns. “Nice to meet all of you, but I would really like to talk to Zach alone right now. I have questions. Lots of them.”

Zach nodded and the rest of the pack organized themselves to exit, but not back the way they’d come. They went through the door on the far end of the solarium into the main part of the house.

“Do they all live here?” I figured I might as well start with the more innocuous questions.

“All of us live together, yes.”

Onward. “Are you all related?” A nice way to ask if they expected me to date my own cousin.

“In most cases, only very loosely.” Zach smiled a little as if guessing one of my sources of discomfort. “We stick together and intermarry, for obvious reasons. The family tree crosses branches, but there’s no close enough blood relative to you for consanguinity to be an issue.”

I didn’t know whether I should feel disappointed or not. “What about my parents?”

“I’m sorry.” Zach’s face sobered and he moved closer, taking my hand between both of his in an unexpected gesture of comfort. “We’re not immortal. Your mother was killed in a car accident, and your father . . . lost heart. He was challenged by a wolf who disputed his ability to lead in his grieving state. He won, but died of injuries sustained in the fight.”

“Fights to the death, forced marriages, you make it all sound so appealing.” My voice came out flat. I tried not to picture wolves tearing at each other, the horror of knowing there were people inside the fur. “What happened after that? Why was I adopted? Why did you let me think I was human all this time?”

Out of all the day’s revelations, that one hit hardest. The knowledge that my entire life was a lie.

“My father was his second in command, so leadership fell to him until you were ready to choose a new king. Given the dispute, he thought you’d be safer growing up outside the pack. Ray, the challenger who lost, or one of his followers might have tried to prevent your free choice.”

I shivered at what Zach didn’t say. “So not everybody’s happy to have the lost princess restored.”

“No. Not everybody.” He admitted the truth, and I appreciated that even while I wanted to scream about the rest of it.

“Can I at least hope that none of those followers are among my prospective dates?” I couldn’t bring myself to say “mates.” Even the word was too permanent, too real, and I really wasn’t ready. But damned if I’d kiss my father’s killer or any wolf who’d supported his challenge.

“Rest easy, Princess.” The corner of Zach’s mouth turned up, just a little. “Ray split the pack after the challenge fight. He’d defied the alpha and lost. That made him outcast. When he left, his men went with him. You’re safe here with us.”

“Good to know.” Although he was still out there, somewhere, wasn’t he? Well, one problem at a time. I needed to make something clear. “Zach, you have to understand I can’t be what you want. Even if all this is true, even if I am about to turn into a wolf, that doesn’t mean I’m ready to just give up my life.”

“Nobody’s asking you to do that.” His grip tightened around my hand. “But you have to understand that you need us. You might not realize it yet, but you will tomorrow.”

Dread turned my mouth metallic and my muscles into lead. “Are you talking about estrus?” 
Pop quiz,
 
I thought on the edge of hysteria. 
What’s worse than turning into a werewolf without warning? Turning into a werewolf in heat
.

He nodded. My throat tightened, making it hard to swallow. I forced out my next question anyway. “Will it happen in human form or animal?”

“Human.” He went still, as if he thought any move he made might be interpreted as aggression.

“Will there . . .” I licked my lips and tried to think of how to ask about their man parts, but there was no delicate way and I had to know. Lupines had an extra at the base of the penis. The bulbus glandis swelled into a rounded knot after penetration, tying a pair together until mating was complete. How wolflike were these men? “Do you have . . . oh, hell, Zach, do you have knots?”

“Yes.”

I appreciated the way he answered me, just straightforward. No avoiding the issue or making fun of my concerns. But he’d raised a new question. “Doesn’t that cause some social problems for you guys?”

I imagined the parade of prime masculine specimens I’d just seen staying forcibly celibate because they couldn’t explain their bonus features to human girlfriends. All that pent-up sexual frustration looking for an outlet.

“The knot only forms during sex with a female werewolf. To human women, we just seem wider at the base.”

Lucky me. I felt faint and it must have shown, because he was quick to add, “Remember, you’re made like we are.”

I remembered. I remembered the knot could lock a couple together for more than half an hour and there were eleven of them. My heart rate kicked up, and adrenaline fueled my muscles into action. Before I’d even formed the thought of escape I was flipping over the back of the chair. I hit the ground running and I made it out the door, then to my car.

“Keys, keys,” I whispered the chant like a prayer as I threw myself inside and reached for the ignition. My hand found empty space. Had David taken them? I felt frantically on the floor by the driver’s side, anywhere he might have left them, and then it was too late. Zach was there, reaching in for me on the driver’s side, and three other Neuri guarded the passenger side.

“No, I didn’t do anything!” Zach was yelling at one of them as his hands closed on me in a gentle but implacable hold. “She had questions. She asked about the knots and then she ran.” He drew me out of the car, into his arms, very slowly. “Chandra, Chandra. We won’t hurt you; I promise.”

The other three came around and pressed close. I recognized the lean redhead and muscular blond who’d spoken to me inside, and another brown-haired man who looked like the youngest of the bunch. Their proximity caused a mixed reaction, as if I saw them with two sets of eyes. Part of me registered their nearness as comfort and protection. The other part saw three strange men as a potential threat. The divided perception paralyzed me.

I let them lead me back inside. This time Zach directed me to a formal living room and pressed me down into a soft leather couch. He took one side of me, and the redhead took my other side. The other two claimed places down the length of the couch.

“Chandra, this is Will. Matt and Jack are brothers.” Zach pointed to each in turn as he made the introductions. Knowing their names didn’t make me feel any better about the possibility of having sex in the throes of estrus with virtual strangers, but it did make them seem less, well, strange.

Will was the young brown-haired man. He had chocolate brown eyes that seemed kind. Matt was the buff blond, and Jack the redhead. They had matching blue eyes but otherwise couldn’t look less alike.

“All of us are happy to meet you,” Jack said, not smiling now. “Please don’t run off without hearing Zach out.”

“I want to talk to David,” I said through lips that felt stiff. Or maybe it was just the way I was clamping my jaw to keep from screaming. “Is he back?”

I had a question for him, and a horrible suspicion that I already knew the answer.

Zach made a gesture at Will, who stood in response. “I’ll go get him.”

Zach really was the alpha. All the others looked to him, listened to him. What would happen to the group if I didn’t want to choose a mate, or if I didn’t want Zach? I stuffed that concern down and decided to worry about myself first, then decide what responsibility, if any, I had to the wolves.

It didn’t take long for Will to reappear with David, who was human again. He’d put his jeans on but hadn’t bothered with a shirt or jacket, and I wondered if they tended to have higher body temperatures than humans.

“Can we talk for a minute?” I aimed the question at Zach, figuring the rest would go along with whatever he said, so I might as well ask the one in charge.

Zach motioned to Jack and Matt. They collected Will and trooped out. David stood looking at me, hands on his hips. “You wanted me?”

The wording combined with the sight of his bare torso made my mouth go dry. I had to swallow before I could ask my question. “Yes. Last night, you said you wouldn’t let me go because you didn’t want me to try to break your jaw again.”

He raised a hand to rub his chin. “It healed almost instantly. Nothing to worry about.”

I felt ill. “I broke your jaw. In my sleep.” Because my night terrors weren’t what I’d always believed they were. They were periods when the wolf hidden inside me started to assert itself.

“Like I said, you fight dirty.” David’s gray eyes were hard to read, so for all I knew he was holding a grudge. It didn’t matter. He’d told me the truth.

He was stronger than any human, and even for a human male he was big, fast, and built. And I’d hurt him. What could I do to a normal person, under the influence of my transformation? I was trained in martial arts. I knew the body’s strike zones, where and how to do damage with maximum efficiency.

“I hurt you,” I whispered. Saying it out loud made it more real.

David tilted his head as he considered me. “You kissed me and made it better.”

Like that made it all right.

I’d also driven my car to the library, and less than two hours later I’d been incapable of driving home. I’d blacked out. What if that fog had swallowed me while I was on the freeway?

The conclusion was inescapable. I was a danger to myself and others in this state. I didn’t know what all the physical implications were, but I was changing. I might be ignorant of the risks those changes involved now, but I didn’t have to stay that way. There was a wolf pack right in front of me, ready and willing to help me cope.

“I’m sorry.” My voice sounded small in the large room. David moved to close the space between us, taking the empty seat next to me on the couch, so I was bracketed between the two of them.

“For kissing me?” David took one of my hands. I realized with a start that Zach was holding the other and wondered when that had happened.

“No.” That drew one corner of my mouth up in a tiny half smile. There was nothing about that kiss I was sorry for, except maybe that it had ended.

“We understand that you don’t have control, Chandra,” Zach said, and the sincere note in his voice made me turn toward him. “You’ll learn. We’ll help.”

And just how many ways would I be out of control? My eyes teared and I blinked the moisture away. “What about sex? Zach, you said I wouldn’t be expected to do anything I didn’t want to do, but am I going to be unable to stop myself?”

I found myself folded into a twin embrace, as each man wrapped an arm around me, nestling me between them. Zach’s arm curved behind me, while David’s hugged around my belly. It felt warm and safe, not sexual or aggressive.

“We’ll help,” Zach said, which wasn’t quite an answer. “And instinct will guide you. Wolves are monogamous; they seek one mate and mate for life.”

“Nice evasion,” I sighed. “You’ve already implied I’ll be kissing my way through the rank and file under the influence of going into heat. Just tell me what’s going to happen.”

“What will happen will be what you want,” Zach promised. “We’ll compete for your favor. You’ll choose who you want and how.”

“Define ‘compete for my favor.’” The sensation of being sandwiched between two men, with the memory of kissing both of them fresh in my mind, was starting to make me feel warmer and interested in something beyond pure comfort. That did not bode well.

“Sexual competition.” Zach’s voice was matter-of-fact, but his hand traced the back of mine as he spoke, and that small touch felt dizzying. “I know the knots scared you, but sexual contact isn’t limited to intercourse. There are lots of options. Kissing. Touching. Oral sex, manual stimulation, massage.”

I licked dry lips. “So I’ll be expected to get physical with all of you, but not necessarily get . . . knotted.”

“Right.” From the sound of it, the topic of conversation combined with our nearness was starting to get to Zach, too. But I gave him points for not making any moves.