Angelica Lost and Found (16 page)

‘Now that we’ve had the metaphor,’ I said, ‘maybe we could get some lunch?’

We went to Sutro’s at the Cliff House where we had beer-braised black mussels with frites and Veuve Clicquot which made the world a little easier to take.

As we drove back to town the sky was not yet dark but the street lights were on and the lights in the houses. That time of day always brings an ache to my throat. I feel that all those, now gone, who have known this gentle goodbye from the day that is passing, never to return, are seeing it through my eyes. Volatore also seeing it through my eyes. ‘
“Look thy last on all things lovely, every hour …”
 
’ I sang under my breath, like Cinderella crouching in the ashes.

Olivia notices everything.

‘I think you need to pull yourself together, Angie,’ she said. ‘Maybe you just need to get laid. Didn’t you have something going with Clancy?’

‘Been there, done that,’ I said. ‘It didn’t work for me.’

‘OK, maybe Clancy didn’t float your boat. But this Volatore shit is going to drive you crazy if you don’t let go of it.’

‘You’re right, Liv – I’ll try to do better.’

When she dropped me off I stepped wearily into the bleakness of the street lamps, the shadows and the mica sparkles on the pavement. In the past, easing through those lamps and shadows and sparkles, I used to wish I had a cat waiting for me. Now Irene was waiting. She’d rub against my leg and purr, then she’d keep me company and dab at the foam while I had a hot bath. There’d be a large Jack Daniel’s beside the tub, and on the Bose, warm and golden and shadowy, the strings of Monsieur de Sainte-Colombe.

Chapter 41

Passing, Never to Return

‘Passing, never to return!’ These words have come into my mind like some melancholy refrain that refuses to go away. Passing, passing, never to return! What? Everything? Angelica and Volatore both? Shall we cease to be imagined? Shall we pass like the fading of the day, like breath upon a mirror, suddenly gone?

Chapter 42

Mostly Like a Horse

He calls himself Volatore and he is not
my
Volatore. But he smells like him. An olfactory mystery. I went to the Mission Police Station on Valencia and 17th. Once there I stood looking at the
Seven Dancing Stars
for a while. I don’t like to miss meaningful signs of any kind, and these boulders set in the floor, representing the Pleiades, might well have some significance for me. These seven sisters of mythology, daughters of Atlas, are named in
Lemprière’s Classical Dictionary
as Alcyone, Merope, Maia, Electra, Taygeta, Sterope and Celeno. Merope’s star is dim because she married a mortal. A warning about mixed marriages? The constellation is near the back of Taurus in the zodiac.

There was a sort of bank teller’s window in the wall behind the elevator.

‘I want to report a missing person,’ I said.

This got me to a Sergeant Hennessy, a large bear of a man whose look and manner made me want to climb into his lap and tell him everything that was troubling me. I think he sensed this because he remained standing at a safe distance.

‘OK,’ he said after I had identified myself. ‘Who’s missing?’

‘A man who calls himself Volatore.’

‘Sounds like an opera. Is that his first name or his last name?’

‘He says it’s his only name.’

‘Relation of yours?’

‘No.’

‘Friend?’

‘Sort of.’

‘Where and when did you last see him?’

‘At the Eidolon Gallery in the Mission four or five days ago. I’m not sure – it’s been a confusing time for me.’

‘Describe him.’

‘Over six feet tall, strongly built; long black hair, long face, high cheekbones, blue eyes. Wearing black jeans, blue denim shirt, Timberland boots, all new. Paint smears on everything.’

‘Any identifying marks?’

‘A naked-woman tattoo on his right wrist and a hippogriff on his left wrist.’

‘You don’t have to explain what a hippogriff is – I read sci-fi fantasy.’

‘Plus he’s got a smell.’

‘What kind of smell?’

I almost said. ‘A hippogriff smell,’ but I caught myself in time and said, ‘Mostly like a horse.’

‘
Mostly
like a horse. Anything else in his smell?’

‘Some other kind of animal I didn’t recognise. But you can’t mistake the smell.’

‘Right: mostly like a horse. That narrows it down. OK, we’ll give you a call when we have anything to report.’

At home I got my big
Maps of the Heavens
off the shelf and turned to Albrecht Dürer’s ‘Northern Hemisphere’. I searched for Taurus but couldn’t find him, let alone the Pleiades. No luck with anyone else’s ‘Northern Hemisphere’ either. ‘OK,’ I said. I went to my PC and googled for Seven Sisters Road, figuring there probably was one somewhere in San Francisco. This took me by devious routes to some beautiful Victorian houses in Alamo Square. At that point my search frenzy left me and I went to the gallery where I spent the rest of the day cataloguing Alyosha Zhabotinsky.

I expected a long wait for any result and I had misgivings about the possible waste of police time but the next day I had a call from Sergeant Hennessy.

‘We’ve got a man here who answers your description except no smell, wrong name and fifty thousand dollars. Would you know anything about that?’

‘Yes, I would. He didn’t steal it.’

‘He says his name is Joe Fontana and he doesn’t know you. If you’d like to have a look at him come to the station today because we’ve got nothing but a vagrancy charge to hold him on. Unless you’ve got some other charge to make.’

‘Where’d you find him?’ I said.

‘He was sleeping on a veranda in Alamo Square. The owners of the house were away but a neighbour reported a vagrant on the premises.’

‘You guys sure work fast. I’ll be right over.’

When I arrived at the station Sergeant Hennessy showed me into what I suppose was a small interrogation room where the artist formerly known as Volatore was sitting at a table.

‘Is this going to be distressing for you in any way?’ Hennessy asked me.

‘No,’ I said, ‘it isn’t that kind of thing.’

‘Right,’ he said. ‘Here’s Mr Fontana. No ID, no address, new clothes and Timberlands with paint smears. And fifty thousand smackers.’

‘That’s him,’ I said.

‘Shall I leave you to it,’ said Hennessy, ‘or do you want me to stick around?’

‘Please do – I’m sure you’re better at asking useful questions than I am.’

‘You start and I’ll stand by for the time being.’ To Fontana he said, ‘I’ve already told you that you’re not charged with anything but vagrancy. This lady thinks you might be able to help her.’

‘OK,’ said Fontana to me. ‘How can I help you?’

‘Why did you tell me your name was Volatore?’

‘I’ve never heard that name till now and I’ve never seen you before.’

‘Do you remember where you got the fifty thousand dollars?’

‘I didn’t even know I had it until the cops frisked me and counted it.’

‘You don’t remember doing a painting?’

‘You mean a picture?’

‘Yes.’

‘No, I wouldn’t know about anything like that.’

‘Forgive me if my questions seem strange. Can you recall any weird dreams you’ve had lately?’

‘Dreams are personal.’

‘Of course they are.’

‘So why should I tell you mine? I’ve got fifty thousand bucks that I didn’t steal and I can stop being a vagrant and answering questions.’

‘Calm down,’ said Hennessy. ‘Maybe I’ll book you for committing public nuisance.’

‘What public nuisance?’

‘Peeing in the bushes in Alamo Square. Now answer the lady.’

‘Dreams?’ I said.

‘No.’ To Hennessy he said, ‘Go ahead and book me for peeing in the bushes, I’m pretty sure I can pay the fine. Whatever dreams I have belong to me and nobody else.’

‘Do you remember Lenore Goldfarb?’ I asked him.

‘No. Should I?’

‘She paid you that money for a painting.’

‘I never heard of the lady.’

‘I can arrange for her to refresh your memory.’

‘What for?’

‘She paid you that money for a painting that came from a dream. The painting is in the Eidolon Gallery now. Would you like to see it?’

‘No.’

‘This is kind of interesting,’ said Hennessy. ‘Do you want us to take him to your gallery?’

‘Yes, please.’

‘I don’t think I have to agree to that,’ said Fontana.

‘Yes, you do,’ said Hennessy, ‘or I may have to take you in hand for resisting arrest.’

‘But I haven’t resisted arrest.’

‘That can be arranged, fella.’

So we went to the gallery and Hennessy stood Fontana in front of the painting.

‘Funny thing,’ said Hennessy, ‘looking at that makes me a little woozy.’

‘What about
him
?’ said Olivia.

Fontana was lying on the floor. He had fainted. We brought him around with a little cold water in his face and sat him up. The paintings on the walls suddenly looked empty, as if the virtue had left them. Paintings! I thought, what an odd thing to do.

‘Can I go now?’ said Fontana.

‘What about the painting?’ I asked him. ‘It’s your own work.’

‘I don’t remember doing it and looking at it makes me a little sick. I don’t know what else I can tell you.’

By this time I was pretty sure that Hennessy felt as Olivia and I did: Fontana was the victim of some kind of temporary mind alteration and was still in a frail state.

‘Where are you going when you leave here?’ Hennessy asked him.

‘First I’ll get myself a place, then I’ll think what to do next.’

‘Here’s my card,’ said Hennessy. ‘Phone me and tell me where you’ll be. I don’t want you to pass out somewhere and be lying unfound for days.’

‘Thanks,’ said Fontana.

‘Give you a lift anywhere?’ said Hennessy.

‘That’s a lot of money to be carrying around,’ I said. ‘We can keep most of it here in the safe for you or open an account for you at our bank.’

‘OK,’ said Fontana. He had fifty thousand-dollar bills. He peeled off one and gave me the rest. ‘Please just keep it here for now,’ he said.

‘So?’ said Hennessy. ‘Lift?’

‘Thanks,’ said Fontana. ‘I’m going to do some walking to clear my head.’

With that he left. Odourlessly, the man who was not my Volatore.

Chapter 43

Farnesses of Tinyness

I am confused, forlorn, full of doubts. Again and again I try to send my thoughts and fears to Angelica but there is no response from her. Have my messages gone astray? Is she sending messages to me?

Now I wonder how things have come to this pass. How did I come to be stranded in this nowhereness, half out of one reality, half into another? Where and when was the beginning of it? My memory is scattering into dancing colours, blurs and flashes swooping to escarpments of eyes, caverns of listening, farnesses of tinyness. A sorcerer told me to go where I went, I looked into an eye and saw the beginning or was it the end of me?

Chapter 44