Angela's Salvation (8 page)

"I think you're doing enough already, Mr. Fitzgerald," she was amazed at how much better she felt about herself after her talk with him today.

"I think under the circumstances you can call me Nolan," he chuckled warmly, "and if it's okay I'll use your name as well, the Mr. and Ms. stuff was starting to get annoying."

"Okay Nolan, and of course I don't mind if you use my name." She found it funny that they were discussing such a normal topic after the bombshells they'd dropped on each other today.

"About your name..." he smiled playfully.  "I came up with an idea for a stage name yesterday and wanted to get your opinion, how about Angel Storm?"  The name really did fit this lovely woman and he hoped she approved because he saw tons of marketing ideas using it.

She liked the sound of the name and grinned enthusiastically.  "I think it's really cool!"  Her stomach growled at that precise moment, reminding her she hadn't eaten since lunch.

He chuckled at the sound, "Would you do me the honor of letting me take you out to dinner?" 
They'd been talking for over an hour and he knew she'd probably want to rest soon to prepare for her training tomorrow.

"I don't know Nolan, wouldn't the papers have a field day with you taking one of the contestants out to eat?" She was only half-joking as she made the comment, but for personal reasons she didn't want to be center of rumors with him.

"Well I think if we keep it low key, and visit a pizza joint, the paparazzi might not get clued in."  The fact of him visiting anything but a five-star restaurant would definitely be off the radar, he knew.

The mention of pizza made her remember that her friends were ordering in tonight, "Crap I forget Lizzie and Devon were ordering pizza tonight, I really should be getting back to the hotel."

He was somewhat amazed at how much he didn't want her to leave tonight, but smiled in understanding.  "Far be it for me to keep you away from your pizza buddies," he laughed softly and stood up holding out his hand to help her stand.

Without thought she took his hand and let him help her, still smiling.  As they walked out to his limousine, she was still feeling happier than she could ever remember being before.  They chatted all the way back to the hotel, and as they finally arrived she impulsively reached over to hug him.  For reasons she couldn't contemplate it felt normal, even though she was a little embarrassed by her actions.

He returned her hug, almost as shocked as she was, and without thought he lowered his lips to her cheek and kissed her tenderly.  "Thank you for an amazing night Angela," he smiled at the rosy blush on her cheeks.

Opening the car door she laughed softly and got out.  "I had fun," she waved and all but ran to the entrance of the hotel.  If anyone had told her last week she'd be spending time with Nolan Fitzgerald she would have laughed in
their face, she thought as she hurried upstairs to meet Lizzy.

She was amazed at how much fun she had with Devon and Lizzy, and the other five they'd invited down to the lobby.  They'd downed enough Pizza and soda to make them sick and then practiced together until well after midnight.  When she finally crawled into bed she was given a peaceful night without the horrible nightmares that plagued her.

The week flew by with photo shoots, practices and her personal training with Nolan.  An entire weekend of relaxation was coming as soon as she finished her time with Nolan and she was somewhat excited to be able to enjoy some down time.  Walking into the studio she was filled with eager anticipation.  She really wasn't uncomfortable at all around him anymore and it was more than a relief to be able to enjoy his company.

He was sitting at his piano as she walked into the studio, and gave a warm smile as he lifted his aching fingers.  "How were the classes today?"  He already knew that the trainers were impressed with her improvement, but wanted to hear it from her lips.

"They are getting easier by the day thanks to you," she returned his smile, and sat her oversized purse down on the floor before joining him on the piano bench.  This was how they'd began their meeting for the last few days, him playing as she sang.

"You didn't bring your guitar," yesterday he'd discovered she'd left her guitar at home because she didn't know they'd be staying if they won the competition, so he'd given her one from the studio.

Smacking her forehead with the back of her hand playfully, she laughed.  "Sorry I was running late this afternoon and forgot it."

He chuckled at her antics, "Well I might forgive you this one time."  He began playing the latest song they were working on, and smiled as her incredible voice blended with the music.  Listening to her sultry lilts filled his soul with a longing he'd never felt before, and he lost himself in the magic they made.

She allowed the music to take over her mind, and sang of a lover that broke her heart, leaving her longing for the wonder they had shared so long ago.  When the last line ended, she watched in amazement as Nolan's talented fingers created the riveting melody to end the story in song.  "You should play more," she whispered softly, still enraptured in the moment.

His hands stilled on the keys, and he turned to face her, their faces scant inches apart.  "You make me want to play again Angela," without thought, he lowered her lips and found hers.  If she'd pulled away he could have stopped his hands from moving to either side of her face and pulling her closer, but she leaned closer and he was lost in the desire her sultry performance inspired.

The feel
of his warm lips caressing hers forced a soft sigh to escape and when their tongues danced together, she was not afraid in the least, only wanting.  Wrapping her arms around his neck, she gave in to the beauty of his kiss, amazed at the tenderness this incredible man showered upon her.

Their pasts melted away for a few precious moments, and he surrendered to the ache that he'd felt all week while watching her become the star she would soon show the world.  Reality seeped in, and he broke the kiss, keeping his hands on her face as he searched her endless blue eyes, looking for regret, and thankfully finding none.  "You make me believe again, Angela," he spoke softly, his thumb moving across her swollen lips lightly.

Astonished by the emotion on his handsome face, she was amazed that she could be responsible for making this proud man feel anything.  She should be terrified, she reminded herself, but felt only contentment as he gently stroked her cheek with his long fingers.  "What are you doing to me Nolan," she whispered breathlessly, her eyes filled with a longing that she'd never felt before.

What was he doing, he thought to himself, forcing his hands to lower and pulling away.  She was this beautiful broken creature, and he wasn't a happily ever after kind of guy.  Standing up, he gave a small smirk, forcing back the gentle emotions she brought out in him.  He was here to help her succeed in her career, he forced his mind to accept, she was too good to fall for a cold-hearted bastard like himself.  "Forgive me, I'm afraid I got lost in the music."

The strange bond she felt while they kissed slowly raveled away with his cold behavior and she shivered. "I guess I did too," she knew there was no way a man like him could ever want a girl like her, but for a few moments it was nice to not be afraid.  Giving an embarrassed smile, she stood up and tried to get her emotions under control.

He felt like the ass he was, as he saw the self-doubt fill her beautiful face again, and hated himself for it.  "It just proves how far you're coming
along," he knew the words were a damn lie as he said them, but she didn't need to get her heart broken by a man like him, he concluded.  Women in his life were decorations not long lasting commitments, and she deserved someone who would love her the way she deserved. 

Disappointed that he had only kissed her because she was performing well, she forced another smile to her face.  "I have a great teacher," she couldn't let him know how much it hurt to know he didn't really want her.

"Well I want you to shine when you perform," What he really wanted was to take her in his arms and drive away the insecurities that kept them both from giving each other a chance.  But his wants and needs weren't really important.  In a few weeks she would be performing against some of the best talent in the world, and he was determined that she outshine them all.  That didn't involve screwing her head up with fake promises that he could give her anything more than a few nights of passion. 

"Let's get back to work then," He didn't need to explain that she wasn't the type of woman for him, she could see it in his face.  So what if he was the first man in her life she actually wanted to touch her.  He was giving her the chance to fulfill a dream, and that was so much more than she deserved.

Forcing his mind to get back into training mode, they worked on dance numbers for the rest of their session.  She had all the dance numbers down, and just needed to practice daily to improve her skills.  When he dropped her off at the hotel he felt like a piece of him was missing, and knew that putting some distance between them was the only way he could keep her safe from his own fucked up needs.

She had no idea who the real person was he hid from the rest of the world, or the things he needed to do with others to be able to make it through his fucked up life.  She was
too good for him, and he'd never allow his deviant nature to hurt her.

He'd discovered after his abuse that he could only find pleasure when he was in complete control of his lover.  It had started innocently enough, tying a woman's hands to a bedpost while he fulfilled his need
s, but escalated quickly in the need to do other things to show his power.  He'd discovered early on that older, more experienced woman were willing to allow him to play his little sex games  and most had begged to discover just how far he would take them  The ones that were offended were never invited into his bed again, and those that enjoyed his depraved acts still weren't kept as lovers for very long. With one exception, he allowed, the only female that could handle how screwed up he was, had been his friend for years.

He had sexual needs like any other man, so he found a way to fulfill those desires in a way that didn't involve a long lasting commitment.  It was for that reason that many considered him the cold-hearted bastard he was.  He never dated innocent women though, and the idea of some happily ever after didn't enter into his ideals for life.  He was upfront about his wants when a woman interested him, and either she was on board with the idea or he sent her packing.

Angela would never fall under the category of a woman he could find pleasure with, because he knew to have her, she needed a person who could truly love her.  Love was a foreign emotion to him, and she deserved a tender lover without all the fuck ups he had, he decided.  His body craved her, but his mind would never allow her to be hurt by his deviant needs. 

Picking up his cell phone, he knew what he needed to alleviate his tension.  She wouldn't ask questions, and would give him exactly what his depraved mind craved. 
Tracy was a gorgeous woman, and one of the few that he knew he could call when his needs got out of hand.  She used him as easily as he used her, so they had an understanding.  Knowing she was married didn't matter to either of them.  Her marriage was one of power and greed, and the senator didn't care who she fucked as long as she was discreet.

Meeting
Tracy's husband five years ago had been one of the strangest nights of his life. The Senator knew that his young wife was a very sexual person, and didn't begrudge her the lovers she wanted as long as his political career wasn't jeopardized.  He'd explained to Nolan that as long as they were discreet, they could even use his home when he was out of town to conduct their liaisons. 

Tracy was a born submissive and her husband
suffered from impedance, but only a knowledgeable few knew that fact.  Some nights he had even watched as his wife was seduced.  In the beginning it had been strange for Nolan to share his deviant acts in front of another, but over the years he discovered his nights with Tracy were almost therapeutic.  She was the perfect escape for his sexual needs, and there was no worry about commitment.

After getting her approval, he gave his driver the address.
Usually his mind was filled with excitement as he drove to meet her, tonight he was more melancholy.  Tracy would fulfill every sexual need he had, and until tonight that had been enough.  For reasons that he knew had to do with a sweet little diva, he just wanted to release the sexual frustration that had built up over his week of self-denial.  The nightmares stayed away as long as he continued to enjoy his little games, so he normally didn't go more than a few days without them.  After five days he could only hope that Tracy was ready for all his frustrations.

As they pulled up to her mansion, he knew she'd be waiting in their private little dungeon, kneeling and ready.  Her sleek body would be proudly on display in nothing but the diamond collar he'd given to her a few months after they agreed on this little arrangement.  As he made his way down the stairs he told his mind to focus on the woman he was here to dominate, and not the beautiful angel his body was longing for.

Walking to his submissive, he stroked her silken hair, as he allowed his eyes to roam over the perfection of her form.  She was every man's wet dream and he wished that his body was responding to the incredible vision she made kneeling on the cool tile of the floor, but he wasn't even in the least bit excited.  Knowing what she needed, his fingers moved under the collar and pulled her to her feet with no tenderness.