An Indelicate Situation (The Weymouth Trilogy) (22 page)

Mr William Wright, resplendent in nightcap and gown, was under interrogation from his dear wife Georgiana as he lay next to her that night.

‘So how much is she
really
worth
, William?’ she was demanding.
‘I feel
sure
she brought some money of her own into her marriage, however
long
ago
it was
.’

Though it was dark, William was acutely conscious of her beady, bird
-
like eye
peering into
his f
ace
.
He kept his eyes firmly shut. It was pleasanter by far.

‘She has yet a couple of thousand pounds, my love. Mr Brewer has invested it in one of his boats
for me
. We are hoping to make a good profit out of the cargo.’

‘Well I hope the cargo is
secure
. It would be
most
irritating should the wretched boat sink, or get captured whilst at sea. What would happen
then
? Is it fully
insured
?’

William coughed a little nervously. This was apparently something that he had not fully taken
into
account.

‘I expect
it is, my love,’ he assured her. ‘Mr Brewer is a canny businessman, after all, and
I am convinced that he would take every necessary precaution. But having invested in a profit
-
sharing deal rather than simply taking interest it does mean that we shall have to support Aunt Staveley ourselves until it all comes to fruition.’

‘Support Aunt Staveley
ourselves
? But how should she expect us to do
that
? We have
enough
problems supporting the children without having to support Aunt Staveley as
well
. Has she no
son
to support her?
Freddy
will have to
pay
for her keep. I daresay he will find a boat for himself
quite
soon. Even a dolt like
him
will
surely
not be
left
to idle his time away
for ever? Once he ha
s
got his commission
I am persuaded that he
’ll
send his money
home
.
He can have no call for it himself after all.
You
can tell her
that
once he does so
she will
just
have to live off
that
.’

It had now
become quite commonplace for Mr Staveley and Maggie to spend their quiet moments in each other’s company – either in the music room, where they practised their duets together, or in the drawing room, where they sometimes took some tea. Maggie had told Freddy the story that she had explained to Mrs Berkeley – about her father’s fall from grace and her consequential loss of status – and he was much
struck
by the
fact that her background was
remarkably
similar to that of Miss Brewer,
albeit,
of course,
with a somewhat different ending.
She had told him a little of the trials and tribulations of a governess in the house of strangers – of the awkwardness of being neither servant nor family but someone in-between, of Master Will’s partiality for depositing unwelcome and oft-unpleasant ‘gifts’ within her bed, of looking into the future and seeing no prospect of a
ny
change.
Freddy, in his turn, told her about his life at sea – how, as quite a small boy, he had been midshipman on a frigate whose captain had been so harsh that every man upon it had at some time suffered the cat o’nine tails and every
boy
,
including himself
,
the bare
-
bottom beatings
that were commonplace at sea
.
He told her these things – of
his perpetual seasickness for several days on heading out to sea – ‘The m
...
.most un
...
.unpleasant sensation in the
whole world, I can assure you,
Miss Owens’
-
of
the
rotting food and cramped
, smelly
living conditions, of the
brutality and yet the strong
camaraderie
of life at sea, of how each man looked out for all of the others and would gladly sacrifice his own life for
that of
a
shipmate
– with a stolid acceptance which impressed her. He was not resentful of his treatment at the hands of what she could only think of as a sadistic old man. He saw the value of learning self discipline and
freely
acknowledged that this was one effective way of doing so. He was even grateful for everything that he had taught him.
He was full of praise for a later captain – Captain Keats – who had taken him aboard his grand three-decker and forced him to attend to his books.
Neither did he appear resentful of the fact that his father – a merchant trading primarily with the
Indies
– had lost Freddy’s inheritance through an uninsured
loss at the hands of a French p
rivateer
. It had been this
which had led to the necessity of him earning his own living when, under normal circumstances, he might reasonably have looked forward to the life of leisure and pleasure normally associated with becoming a gentleman of independent means. She could not help but compare his situation to that of her own – the loss of a fortune that should have been relied upon, the need to make one’s own way in the world, the uncertainty for the future associated with the smallness of income – and to admire the way in which he did not appear to allow it to affect his
eternally
optimistic
approach to life at all
.

‘F
or after all,
Miss Owens, had I comp
...
.completed
my education and lived in London with m
..
.my
mother I should p
..
.prob
..
.probably have gam
..
.gambled
and drunk
the kelter away
by now
and I should ne
ver have had the opportunity of
see
ing
the world as I
have.
And
whilst it
migh
t have been p
...
.pleasant to have
plenty of
balsam
I am hoping that, once I get
my lieutenant comm
...
commission
and the opportunity that this will p...provide for acquiring
p...prize money
I shall b
...
be able to
put something aside and
get myself
in a p
..
.position to m
..
.marry some day.’

‘And should you like that, Mr Staveley? I understand that many naval gentlemen actually find it most difficult to settle down after a lifetime spent at sea.’

‘Oh yes, without a doubt I should
like it
. I am hap
..
.happy
enough
as a sailor,
I suppose
,’
here Mr Staveley sounded only partially convincing. ‘At any rate,
I cannot conceive of any
occupation that would suit m
..
.me
quite
so well – I am a p
...
practical
man after all and on b
..
.board ship I can do p
..
.plenty of
practical things – b
..
.bu
t I have quite domestic taste,
Miss Owens. I should very m
..
.much like to get
spliced
when I
am able
. I expect that you should like to do
the same
yourself
, should you not?
’

Maggie looked at him askance.

‘I suppose I should,’ she admitted, eventually. ‘To be honest it is not something I have thought about since – well, since my father died. I have not been in a position to think of it. But yes, now you mention it, of course I should like to be married. Not only to get out of the situation I find myself in
-
forgive me, Mr Staveley – I do not mean to insult your relatives, but
as you know
a governess’s position is not the most comfortable one – though your own stoicism provides a
salutary
lesson for me
about
that
, I must
admit
– but I suppose
, like you,
I feel that I have a good deal of love to give and would like to think that it will not entirely
go to
waste.’

To be quite honest, Maggie surprised herself by this admission. She had not thought of herself in quite this way
before
.

Mr Staveley looked at her a little quizzically.

‘I do wonder, M
..
.Miss Owens, whether we are b
..
.both destined to love where it would b
..
.be better not to do so?’

Maggie felt a shock pass
right
through her.

‘Whatever do you mean, Mr Staveley?’

‘Forgive m
..
.me, M
..
.Miss Owens. I should not have said anything.’

‘No. No, I cannot accept that. I see you as my friend. I do not have many friends. I feel very much alone. So I
want
you to say
to me
what
ever
you feel
is needed
.’

‘I am glad you see m
...
me as your friend. I
certainly
see you as m
..
.mine. Perhaps I would wish
you
to tell
me
when you think I am making a mistake. It is only fair for m
..
.me to do the same. P
...
please
, then
-
please
do not waste the love you have within you, M
..
.Miss Owens. Save it for someone who is worthy of it,
someone
who can b
..
.benefit from it.
Mr Wright cannot b...benefit from it.
You deserve b
...
.better than to throw it
quite
away
on him
and
to
ruin your
entire
life.’

Maggie had been looking down but now she raised her eyes. She could see that Fredd
y was looking directly at her. And as s
he met his look
she suddenly became aware of
an odd s
ensation
pass
ing
fleetingly
but powerfully
through her
entire body
. She was not quite sure what it was or why it had appeared. Perhaps it was fear – fear that, if both Mrs Berkeley and Mr Staveley had spotted her predisposition
for
Mr Wright
, then someone else might do so as well – someone else who may have far less altruistic reasons
than they did
for
trying to warn
her off. She had ignored Mrs Berkeley.
She had ignored her. Why had she done that, when she had thought that she had
actually
taken heed?
Had she written her off as – well, not quite as an interfering woman with too much time on her hands, that would be most unfair – but as someone who knew very little about life outside her own comfortable existence? No, Maggie didn’t think that she had done this. She had certainly been inclined to do so at first,
but even she could not pretend that Mrs Berkeley had always had an easy life. No, she had not deliberately ignored Mrs Berkeley’s warnings
, Mrs Berkeley’s good advice
. Quite the contrary.
She had tried to implement her plan,
she had tried to reject Mr Wright’s advances,
but she had found
that, when tested, she ha
d
been totally
incapable of
doing so
. But now
that
Mr Staveley, too,
had noticed what was happening and
Mr Staveley
was saying exactly the same thing as Mrs Berkeley had done
she suddenly recognised the very grave danger into which her weakness in this respect was leading her.
There was but one logical conclusion to it, after all, for she knew deep down that Mr Wright would never have the courage or the resolution to leave his wife.
So yes, perhaps this
strange sensation - this
shiver, a shiver that had reverberated across the breadth and depth of her entire body, had partly been due to fear
. B
ut as she continued to look at him and wonder at her reaction to him
Maggie suddenly
became aware of a most curious blend of feelings that she really could not put a name to
-
pride, sadness, admiration, respect
-
and an urgent need that his good opinion
, his valued companionship
, should not be
put in jeopardy
in any way at all.
Mr Staveley was living proof that one could make the best of a life which to all intents and purposes had been blighted by other people’s mistakes – and if he could do it then why not she?
It was at that
very
moment that she
finally
realised that she must, should and could find the strength
required
to do the
proper
thing.