An Escapade and an Engagement (16 page)

But now that she knew the truth she did not know how she would
be able to face him again.

Nor Milly. Her friend.

Her rival.

Chapter Eleven

S
he was avoiding him. Ever since she’d
bolted from him Lord Ledbury had been kicking himself. He’d startled her with
that kiss. And so, even though they were all confined to the house that
afternoon because of the weather, in the end he had to recruit help to
outmanoeuver her.

First he persuaded Lord Halstead that he would enjoy giving the
ladies some instruction in billiards. As usual, Lady Susan and Lucy Beresford
managed to exclude Miss Twining from the activity. And, after several minutes of
watching from the sidelines, she was delighted to accept his invitation to take
a walk in the long gallery so that he could show her the portraits of his many
ancestors.

He heaved a sigh of relief as Miss Twining laid her arm on his
sleeve and they set off. She was not given to conversation, which left him free
to work out how to make Lady Jayne understand the almost blinding revelation
that had led him to kiss her that morning. He had to explain that in that one
moment he’d changed his mind about marrying some paragon who would impress his
family for generations to come. He just wanted
her.

No… That didn’t sound right.

He would have to marshal his thoughts into better order before
blurting out something clumsy like that.

Firstly, then, he would disabuse her of the notion he was in
love with, or had ever been in love with, Milly—and, while he was at it, he
needed to warn her that Milly was up to something. He wasn’t sure quite what it
was yet. But when he’d heard them singing that ballad he’d hardly been able to
believe his ears. Oh, it was innocent enough on the face of it, but in their
regiment they’d sung a version of it so bawdy it would have scandalised even the
gentlemen present in that drawing room. He could have wrung Milly’s neck. How
could she repay all the kindness Lady Jayne had shown her by encouraging her to
sing a song that would have made her a laughing stock if anyone with a military
background had been there?

Admittedly, so far Milly had not actually done anything to harm
Lady Jayne. But she could. Very easily.

Once he’d warned her that she ought not to be quite so trusting
where Milly was concerned, he could move on to telling her that he’d changed his
mind—no, that
she’d
changed his mind—about what he
wanted from a wife. He’d been a stranger to love until he’d met her, so
naturally he had not considered it as an important ingredient in any marriage he
might contract. But she’d taught him it was vital. Vital. Yes, that sounded much
better.

As he mounted the stairs he repeated the phrases in his head,
hoping to fix them in his memory. At times like this he could understand what
Berry saw in Miss Twining. She was the most undemanding of women. They’d walked
the entire way in complete silence, and she had not once attempted to interrupt
his train of thought. He glanced at her as they reached the gallery, wanting to
take note of her reaction when she saw Berry already there with Lady Jayne.

If he had not been paying close attention he would have missed
it. It wasn’t so much that she smiled, more that her whole face softened and her
eyes warmed. And her fingers tightened on his sleeve, ever so briefly.

She was more than willing to accept Berry’s suggestion that the
men—as pre-arranged—should swap partners.

It was harder to read Lady Jayne’s mood. Though she voiced no
objection, neither would she take his arm as they strolled along the corridor.
But still, by dint of stopping at each portrait to expound that person’s life
story, while Berry inexorably drew Miss Twining along to the next, it was not
very long before he had managed to put some distance between himself and the
other couple.

She was uneasy with him. But at least with Berry and Miss
Twining within hailing distance she had no excuse for fleeing the scene
altogether. And, since Berry wanted a modicum of privacy as much as he did, they
were soon far enough away to converse without being overheard.

Which was good, because he had no intention of wasting this
carefully staged meeting by sticking to polite nothings. He knew her well enough
by now to see that the only way he would break through her reserve would be by a
full frontal attack.

‘It is no use,’ he said firmly. ‘I am not going to take the
hint and pretend that kiss this morning never happened. You have been so distant
with me ever since that I can only assume I offended you.’

‘Offended me? Oh… No, not at all,’ she said, so politely it
made him grind his teeth.

‘I must have done. It was not the act of a gentleman to take
advantage like that.’

She still wouldn’t look at him.

‘Please believe me. I just couldn’t help myself. No, dammit,
that’s no excuse, is it? When I saw Kendell pawing you about in the park I
wanted to rip his arms off.’

They came to a standstill. He could not believe he had said
that out loud.

She blushed and walked across the corridor, where she turned
her back on him, ostensibly to look out of the window.

‘It…’ Eventually she managed to speak, in a very low voice.
‘…It was not at all the same.’

For one thing, she had enjoyed it. That slight brush of his
lips had made her yearn for more. She had wanted him to put his arms round her
and prolong the contact. She wouldn’t have fought him off the way she’d fought
Harry. Because he would not have crushed her. She couldn’t imagine Lord Ledbury
doing anything so maladroit when he took a woman in his arms. No, the woman
lucky enough to have Lord Ledbury really kissing her would know only
pleasure….

‘It is generous of you to say so,’ he replied, heartened by her
verbal forgiveness, though she was still pretending to admire scenery that was
scarcely visible through the rain-lashed window rather than facing him.

‘Not at all. I could tell you were just overcome by…some
momentary impulse…’ A perplexed frown pleated her brow, as though she could not
understand what on earth could have motivated him. ‘Whereas when Harry kissed me
it was all part of a deliberate, cold-blooded scheme….’ She shuddered. ‘Looking
back, I could almost wish you
had
ripped his arms
off.’

She turned and shot him a rueful smile over her shoulder.

Well, that was better. ‘I am glad that I could not sleep that
night, then, and decided to take a walk.’

He hitched his hip onto the windowsill, so that he could look
at her profile, at least, since she had turned her head away again, and begun to
fiddle with the tassels on the curtains.

‘Actually, Lady Jayne, this is a good time to tell you that I
have long since decided I am glad the solicitousness of those London servants
drove me outside to seek fresh air, or I might never have met you.’

‘I am glad, too. You came striding down upon us like some kind
of avenging angel—even though, at that time in your life, you were still far
from well.’ She blushed again. ‘D-do you still find it difficult to sleep? Or
have you found some remedy for that particular ailment?’

Far from it. But the sleepless nights he’d suffered since had
been mainly on her account.

He rubbed his hand over the crown of his head and got to his
feet again. She was fencing with him. Deliberately keeping him at a
distance.

‘Lady Jayne,’ he said, remembering his feeling that the only
way to breach her defences was by full-frontal attack, ‘I am trying to tell you
something of great importance. I am trying to explain that I kissed you because…
Well, the truth is that you have saved me from making a terrible mistake.’

He turned her round and took her by the hand, so that he could
be sure she was attending carefully.

‘When we first met, I told you about the kind of marriage I
intended to make. Thinking like a soldier, I made a list of my objectives, drew
up the plan of action most likely to achieve a swift outcome, moved myself into
a strategic position, armed myself to the teeth and started making forays into
what I looked upon almost as hostile territory. Before I met you it never
occurred to me that I ought to feel more than respect for any woman I considered
marrying. But over the last few weeks, and particularly since you have come to
Courtlands, I…that is… You have shown me that a marriage without affection…that
is…without…love would be…a travesty. Lady Jayne, you yourself said that love is
the only reason a man and woman ought to marry…’

‘Yes, I did, didn’t I?’

She was pulling her hand away.

And it occurred to him that just because she wanted to make him
happy, it didn’t mean she was willing to sacrifice herself. She cared enough to
see him happily married to someone else…which led him to the point he ought to
have made first.

‘Now, about Milly…’

She flinched, and began to chew at her lower lip.

‘No, I am not about to scold you for bringing her here. You
meant only to help, and although…’

She looked so uncomfortable he couldn’t continue with the
warning he’d meant to give her. In fact, it would be better to tackle Milly
herself. Ask her what the devil she was playing at and warn her that if she ever
did anything to harm or even embarrass Lady Jayne, their friendship, such as it
was, would be at an end.

‘Well, there is just one benefit of your bringing Milly to
Courtlands,’ he said, wondering where his plan to stick to his well-rehearsed
script had gone. ‘My former army servant, whom I left with her to see her
settled into her new house, came here hotfoot to let me know she had run
off.’

Fred had been frantic with worry over her apparent
disappearance. He’d almost wept with relief to know she was safe and well.

‘Fred
is
most welcome. He knows
just how I like things done, and, since there is nothing for him to do in Town
with Milly being here, he has agreed to stay and resume his role as my valet for
the time being.’

‘Fred?’ She looked up at him with a puzzled frown.

He was almost as puzzled himself. He couldn’t think how he’d
ended up talking about his former batman when what he wanted to say was so
important. He supposed it must have come from her asking about his inability to
sleep….

But before he could wrest the conversation back into line, they
were interrupted.

‘Now, now—cannot have you monopolising Lady Jayne all day,’
boomed the voice of Lord Lavenham.

He looked up with a flash of irritation to see his grandfather
striding towards him, a brace of spaniels frolicking at his heels.

‘Must mingle, my boy. Duty of a host to mingle. And numbers
down in the billiard room are uneven. Get yourself down there and even them up,
what?
I
shall show her ladyship the family
portraits.’

‘As you wish,’ he said flatly, bowing and turning on his heel.
He had not been making much headway with Lady Jayne anyway. He had started off
well enough. But then she’d started chewing her lower lip. And the ability to
think about anything except kissing her had abruptly deserted him.

Time for yet another tactical withdrawal.

Lady Jayne noted the stiff set of his shoulders as he walked
away and felt a surge of anger on his behalf. How
could
the old man treat him like an errant schoolboy? Demean him
like that in front of witnesses?

Lord Lavenham held out his arm with one of his genial smiles
which, now she was on the receiving end of it, she beheld to be totally
false.

She was not in the most receptive of moods to begin with, and
over the course of the next half-hour, during which he not very subtly
interrogated her upon her suitability to become the next Countess of Lavenham,
she grew increasingly annoyed with him. But at least her irritation with his
intrusive questions, coupled with the way he would keep running his eyes over
her as though she was a brood mare, kept her from succumbing to the dreadful
temptation to sit down, bury her head in her hands and burst into tears.

Lord Ledbury had decided to abandon his cold-blooded search for
a titled, accomplished woman to marry. He was going to follow his heart instead.
That was why he’d kissed her that morning. He’d had some kind of…epiphany. And
it was all her doing. By bringing Milly down here she had in fact accomplished
exactly what she’d set out to do. That was what he had been trying to say just
now. Awkwardly, because he had been a soldier and was not used to talking about
feelings of a romantic nature.

And when he’d said he was glad he’d met her it had not been
because he found anything about her in the least bit appealing. Nobody could
possibly just be glad to know her for herself. Had not the last few weeks seared
that knowledge into her consciousness?

But she
had
shown Lord Ledbury that
there was more to life than honour and duty.
That
was why he was glad he’d met her. She’d persuaded him that being in love with
the woman he was going to marry was more important than any other
consideration.

At the very moment she’d discovered she was in love with him
herself, she was going to have to watch him casting everything aside in order to
be with another woman.

She didn’t know how she was going to bear it.

* * *

That evening Lord Ledbury went to his grandfather’s
study, where he knew he would find him taking one last drink before turning in
for the night.

‘Ah, Richard, my boy, take a seat.’ He waved to the chair
opposite the fireplace, where he was ensconced with a large glass of brandy.
‘Come to discuss the girls, have you, now I’ve had a chance to look ’em all
over?’

‘Not exactly.’ Not in the least. For he did not give a damn
what his grandfather thought. He sat down, crossed his legs, and leaned back
before saying, ‘I just thought it would be polite to let you know that I’ve made
up my mind regarding whom I intend to marry.’