An Elm Creek Quilts Sampler (52 page)

“He’s right,” Bonnie said. “You two better get going or you won’t make it to the stadium in time.”

“What about you?” Terri asked, climbing out of the booth.

“I’m going to watch it from the club down the street.” Bonnie explained that she didn’t have a ticket because she had decided to come at the last minute. She saw Craig and Terri exchange a long look. Now Bonnie’s presence had finally been explained, and now Terri finally understood why Craig had canceled the date. But Craig still didn’t know why Terri had shown up after he had told her not to, and Terri had no idea why Craig had changed his mind and why on earth he had brought his wife along.

They would have plenty of time to talk at the game.

Craig and Terri walked with her to the bar, two blocks away. They arranged to meet outside the stadium after the game. Bonnie waited until Craig and Terri climbed onto the Campus Loop bus that would take them to the stadium, and then she went inside the bar.

She was exhausted. Everything was going well so far, but the effort had drained her.

The layout of the bar had not changed since her last visit years ago; the dining room was empty, but the bar was nearly full. One wall was lined with big-screen TVs, all tuned to the same station. Bonnie took the last available table and ordered a drink.

Her eyes were fixed on the screen, but her mind was with Craig and Terri. There was no reason for them to go to the game, not with “the wife” safely out of the way. They could be in the hotel room that very minute. After they wore themselves out with lovemaking, they would turn on the game and watch it as they cuddled, so later they could describe plays and statistics to her as if they had been in the stadium. At the last possible moment they would race hand in hand across campus to the meeting place outside the stadium, still glowing from their encounter and from the glee of deceiving her.

Bonnie shook her head to force the thoughts away. She couldn’t think like that. Surely by now they were too worked up and anxious and guilty to even contemplate having sex. Besides, they knew she had a key to the hotel room. They wouldn’t risk it.

She kept reassuring herself until she almost believed it.

She nursed her drink through the first quarter, then switched to soft drinks for the rest of the game. It seemed hours until the fourth quarter, but finally it was time for her to leave if she wanted to meet Craig and Terri promptly. But Bonnie didn’t budge. Her heart began to pound as the game ended, but still she didn’t leave. Instead, she struck up a conversation with some of the other customers and focused her attention on an interview with Joe Paterno.

Suddenly she spotted Craig and Terri making their way through the crowd toward her, unsmiling, carefully apart from each other. She pretended not to see them until they reached the table and Craig spoke her name.

Bonnie feigned astonishment. “Is it that time already?”

“We waited for you for twenty minutes,” Craig said, almost woebegone.

“I lost all track of time.” Bonnie rose and forced out a cheerful smile. “You two must have enjoyed the game even more than I did, since you were in the stadium.”

“It was all right,” Craig said, but neither he nor Terri looked as if they’d had much fun.

They were ready for supper, so they walked several blocks east to an Italian restaurant. Craig and Terri seemed ill at ease with each other and grateful for Bonnie’s conversation, which was nearly a monologue, the others spoke so infrequently. Soon she had them grinning in spite of themselves with the anecdotes from Steve’s sportswriter friends. Bonnie could almost forget what had brought them together in that place.

They left the restaurant at dusk.

“Where are you staying?” Bonnie asked Terri as they strolled down College Avenue toward the Hotel State College. The three walked side by side, with Bonnie in the middle.

“I’m going home.”

“Oh, do you have to? I was looking forward to hearing more about your computer store over breakfast.”

Terri fidgeted with the straps of her purse. “No, I’d better get home. It’s only an hour away. No sense in paying for the sitter if I don’t have to.” She shook Bonnie’s hand. “Thanks so much for all your advice.”

“Don’t mention it. Any time. You have my number.”

Terri nodded. Then her mouth tightened and she extended her hand to Craig. “Good-bye,” she told him, and her words carried a ring of finality.

Craig shook her hand and nodded, but said nothing. Terri flashed them a quick, tight smile and walked away.

Bonnie and Craig watched her until she rounded the corner, then they continued on to the hotel.

“Terri seems very nice,” Bonnie said.

“She thinks you’re nice, too.” He paused. “Actually, she thinks you’re wonderful. She said you were ‘an inspiration.’”

“No kidding. I don’t think anyone’s ever called me that before.” Bonnie kept her voice casual. “The next time you write to her, why don’t you invite her to visit us in Waterford?”

“I don’t think we’ll be writing to each other anymore.”

“Oh.”

A moment passed in silence as they walked on.

“Bonnie—” Craig hesitated. “There’s something I need to tell you about this trip.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Yes, I—”

“Craig, I already know.”

Silence.

“Oh.” His voice was leaden. “I guess I knew that.”

She glanced at him, and saw to her amazement that his face was contorted, as if he were fighting back tears. His pace slowed until he came to a stop in the middle of the sidewalk.

“Bonnie—” His voice broke. “I’m so sorry—”

Her first instinct was to comfort him, to tell him everything would be all right, that they could slip back into their comfortable, routine married life as if he had not set out to betray her. She had won, and in her victory she could afford to be generous. But the words stuck in her throat. She had won him back, but watching him fight off tears, she couldn’t imagine ever trusting him again.

“I don’t think I can go through this again,” she heard herself say.

“You won’t have to. I promise.”

She tried, but she couldn’t believe him. She would never know when the next Terri would come along, and she couldn’t bear to spend every waking moment suspecting him, watching him, waiting for the ground beneath her feet to shift and crumble again. She deserved better than a lifetime of suspicion and mistrust. She deserved better.

“Bonnie?” Craig pleaded. “Please say you forgive me.”

“Of course I do,” she said, thinking,
I don’t know if I can.

They walked on.

When they arrived home on Sunday, Bonnie unpacked her suitcase with barely a word for her husband. Then she went to her sewing room, where she took out the round robin quilt.

She chose green and blue for the colors of Elm Creek Manor. She chose blue for truth and green for new beginnings. She followed Diane’s lead and chose a darker shade of cream for her background; Diane had given her such good advice lately that it seemed reasonable to accept her guidance this time, too.

She pieced a border of pinwheel blocks—pinwheels for her windblown life, which with faith and perseverance she tried to stitch into order. The pattern was a four patch, a square divided into four smaller squares, which were in turn divided into two equal triangles, one light, one dark, like the darkness of the past week and the light hope of the future. She wanted to believe in hope.

One side of each triangle was for Craig, one for Terri, and one for herself, but as the border took shape, the triangles melted into the pinwheel pattern, and all she could see was the motion spinning ever forward, but to what destination, she did not know.

Seven

S
ylvia traced around the template, careful to keep the points of the diamond clear and distinct as she drew on the wrong side of the dark blue paisley fabric. She would hand-piece this quilt, she decided, to ensure the accuracy of the piecing and the sharpness of the points. She had made other Broken Star quilts before, but this one was special. When it was complete, it would hang in the front foyer to welcome their guests to Elm Creek Manor.

A twinge of pain shot through her hand, so sharp that she dropped the scissors. She massaged her right hand with her left, waiting for the ache to subside. More and more frequently these days, aches and pains interrupted her work. Sarah told her she ought to see a doctor, but Sylvia put it off. She loathed doctors. They never kept their appointments promptly, and she had much better things to do than sit in an uncomfortable waiting room chair paging through outdated magazines. When the doctors finally condescended to see her, they would immediately trot her over to the scale and urge her to put on some weight. A few minutes later, they would draw some blood and order her to watch her cholesterol. How on earth was she supposed to watch her cholesterol and put on weight at the same time? Honestly. She was seventy-seven years old and didn’t need some child a fraction of her age telling her how to feed herself.

After all, nothing was wrong with her. Even her little scare a few months ago had turned out to be nothing. Fortunately, Sylvia had kept it to herself or Sarah would have rushed her to the emergency room. The headache had come out of nowhere, and it was more severe than any Sylvia had ever felt. When she stood up to get an aspirin, she couldn’t keep her balance. When she tried to call for help, the words came out in the wrong order, startling her into silence. She was on the verge of asking Sarah to call the doctor, but when the sensations faded after only a few minutes, she decided there was no sense in complaining. Later she heard Gwen describing a migraine, and she realized that was what she had experienced. It was a relief, but annoying, too, to learn she had suddenly developed migraines at her age.

When the pain in her hand had faded, Sylvia began to arrange the pieces she had already cut, dozens of diamonds in blue, green, and purple jewel tones. Claudia preferred—had preferred—pastels, but Sylvia liked the intensity of the darker hues. If Claudia were to walk in on her now, she would surely work herself into a good pout. “Can’t you choose something more cheerful for once?” she would say.

“You’re the cheerful one, little Miss Sunshine. You make the happy quilts if you want them so badly.”

Claudia would scowl at the nickname, but it wouldn’t prevent her from carrying on. “And what’s this—another Lone Star?”

“No.”

“It looks like a Lone Star to me.”

“It’s not.” Sylvia would pause and hide a smile. “It’s a Broken Star.”

“Well, close enough,” Claudia would retort, exasperated.

Claudia was right; Sylvia did make many Lone Stars and Lone Star variations. And why not? It was her favorite pattern, after all, and there were so many ways to arrange the colors and values to create the appearance of depth and movement. And perhaps just a tiny part of her found a smug satisfaction in choosing a pattern that Claudia struggled with. Even with the far simpler LeMoyne Star block, Claudia would chop off the tips of her diamonds, line up seams improperly, and distort the fabric so that the star bulged in the center. Meanwhile, Sylvia would hum pleasantly as she worked and would pretend not to notice Claudia’s jealousy as one Lone Star diamond after another fell into place swiftly and precisely, as if it were no effort at all.

Only Sylvia knew the truth: although she made it look easy, it was difficult to piece those blocks so perfectly. If she were alone, she might have relaxed and allowed herself a slight misalignment, the tiniest bulge. But not with Claudia hovering around, watching and waiting for her to make a mistake.

She caught herself. Claudia wasn’t watching anymore. She knew that.

Suddenly she felt overcome by shame. Of course her sister had been jealous of her all those years. Sylvia had done everything within her power to encourage that jealousy. She knew she was the better quilter and made certain everyone else knew it, too. She had been an arrogant show-off since the day she first picked up a needle. She could have helped Claudia become a better quilter; she could have been modest about her own successes; she could have admitted that Claudia’s quilts were as warm and comfortable as her own. She could have ignored the minuscule errors that no one else saw until she pointed them out.

But at the time, Claudia had always seemed the one at fault. How could Sylvia have been so wrong and not have sensed it?

Sylvia closed her eyes for a moment and forced the thoughts away. Her right hand shook as she reached for the scissors again. The pain returned like an electric shock from her knuckles to the elbow. She gasped and tried to drop the scissors, but her hand had frozen up, tightening with the pain. She used her left hand to open the clenched fingers, and the scissors fell to the table.

“Are you all right?”

She looked up to find Andrew in the doorway of the sitting room. He looked concerned as he approached, and she wondered how long he had been standing there.

“I’m fine,” she said. “Just some aches and pains.”

“Are you sure?”

She followed his line of sight and saw that he was studying her hands. Without realizing it, she had resumed the massaging motions. She forced herself to stop and let her hands fall to her sides. “It’s nothing.”