Jennifer joined us at breakfast, toting a bagel, cream cheese, and salmon. “Lots of coffee, please,” she asked as she sat down. She’d put her hair in pigtails and topped it with her signature straw cowboy hat. We smiled at her discreet suggestion of a late night with Massi.
“Details,” Polly said.
Jennifer closed her eyes and sighed. “He’s so charming and attentive. He asked me so many questions. You know how much I talk?” she paused. “I was speechless. Me! I just wanted to stare and listen to him. Even when he looks at me, I feel special.” She took a bite of her breakfast and exhaled.
“How late did you stay up? Did he kiss you? When are you getting married?” Kelly fired questions at her.
We laughed—including Jennifer.
“We went to one of those canopy-bed lounges on the beach. I lost track of time. He’s got the softest brown eyes with dark lashes. I didn’t realize how starved I’ve been for a compliment until I got one,” Jennifer confessed. “Why did I settle for a loveless relationship for so long?”
I’d asked myself the same question after my divorce. “I’ll bet you’re the type of person who doesn’t quit because something gets tough.”
Denise chimed in, “And there’s nothing wrong with enjoying a compliment. Especially if it’s true.”
“For the record . . . I know this is a short shot at romance,” Jennifer said, resuming her story. “I’m aware it’s Jamaica, at Hedonism, and he leaves tomorrow. I’m just enjoying the pheromone attraction. If any of you sees something I should know, please tell me. Promise? My track record hasn’t been the best.”
“Absolutely,” I offered my pledge among the others.
Jennifer tried to wipe a tear from her eye without us noticing.
“We love you, Jennifer,” Kelly said, hugging her from behind. “It’s your turn—wherever you find it! Ask him if he’s got a bald brother.”
I wasn’t sure what type of divorce Jennifer had gone through, but it was obvious the troupe had gone through it with her.
“I’ll try to listen to my head,” Jennifer promised us. “Okay, enough about me. Anyone got any ideas for class today? Sybil suggested we take turns leading a warm-up that teaches basics.”
“Sounds like a start,” Polly said.
“I’m good with following the flow,” I agreed. “Not to change the subject, but Jazz asked us to look in on the lunch spin today.”
“That might be a nice gesture to the staff,” Denise said. “Maybe we could get them to announce the class over the PA.”
“Kat, when Massi joins us on the beach . . . give me your opinion,” Jennifer pleaded. “I trust your eye.”
“What time did you get to bed?” I asked, reaching for my Diet Coke.
“He walked me to the room around three thirty,” she said. “I’d no idea until I saw my alarm. I might have time to nap on the beach before class,” she said wistfully, “but I’m hoping henna may stop some of the pedestrians. I really want us to get a class flow and hope we blow that hard-ass entertainment manager’s dismissal out of the water.”
“Me too,” I agreed.
Jennifer raised her coffee cup to the waitress for one more refill.
“So Lara gets in tomorrow? On your birthday?” I said.
“Yeah, she’s supposed to call me when she gets on the shuttle,” Jennifer said. “Should be here about an hour after class.” She sipped her fresh cup of Joe. “Don’t say anything, but she met a guy a couple of weeks ago on a blind date. I think he’s turned her head.”
“You two’ll have something to talk about then,” I said and raised my eyebrows. “I re-met Steve without knowing who he was, even though we went to high school together. It was kinda like you and Massi . . . we saw each other and something just sparked.”
“Really?” Jennifer asked pleadingly.
I didn’t want to give her false hope, but we had, and it was a lasting attraction.
“Initially. But the getting-together process was challenged by everyday life, past history, and entanglements,” I answered.
Two more couples from pajama night in the disco passed us and waved. We grinned and gave a prom-queen wave back. “We’re getting recognized,” she said, smiling.
“I’m outta here,” I said. “Gonna get my suit and stuff. Meet you at the beach?” I asked. I waved at the waitress who was coming to clear our table. “Thanks.”
She motioned for me to wait and hurried to our table. “We saw you practicing this morning. When’s the show?” she asked us.
Jennifer and I looked at each other and saw light bulbs.
“We’re waiting to hear,” Jennifer said. “Any word from the staff would be helpful. We’re starting classes today in the fitness center around one thirty. You’re welcome to spread the word.”
“I will. You ladies are pretty,” she said as she began to clear our table.
“Thank you, lovely lady,” I replied. I stood and patted her affectionately on the back. “We’re enjoying it.” She smiled as we parted.
Heading back to the room, Jennifer worked the path. I just followed her lead in the background. I liked the background spot.
“See you down at the beach,” I called as I opened my room.
For about two minutes, I closed my eyes to think about what my husband was doing. By now, he’d have walked our dog, drunk his green tea, thrown the pink, squeaky soccer ball, made coffee, eaten some oatmeal, and had one more cup of coffee as he finished reading the obituaries. In contrast, I’d practiced in a sticky, hot disco for a show that lower management didn’t have any faith in. But the guests and staff were growing on us. Some had a little too much skin showing, but they were friendly folks.
I left the room carrying a fresh towel and sunscreen. I still worried about red skin against a chartreuse costume . . .
if I ever got to wear the costume,
that is
. In light of our circumstances, I didn’t worry too much about it but honored the possibility. I spotted Melody, Kelly, and Polly chatting at the chair line. Denise was floating in the water with Sybil.
“Melody, I saw you with some bags. Did you find good buys?” I asked, moving water floats between chairs.
“I’m wearing a new top at the first class,” she said with a sly smile.
“Where’s Ruth?” I asked. I assumed she was on a bird mission.
“On her way,” Kelly muttered under the towel over her head. “She’s checking out a bird tour at a local mangrove tomorrow. If we snorkel tomorrow, she wants to bird. You’re snorkeling with us, right?”
“Sure!” I answered. I loved to watch fish.
A familiar jingle approached our belly dancer beach camp. We turned to see Jennifer hauling a little cooler and her beach bag.
“Hi, ladies. Henna anyone?” she invited, swinging her cooler forward. “Gotta keep it on ice.”
“I’ll take a butterfly on my ankle,” Kelly volunteered, arm in the air. “Can I still jump the cliffs tonight?”
“Absolutely,” Jennifer replied, looking up and down the beach as if expecting someone. The shoreline was speckled with beachcombers. “I wanna see what’s down the beach later. Maybe we can attract some of the walkers this morning with henna.”
“I’m hot as hell,” Polly grumbled and grabbed her float. Everyone followed. I complained to myself as I tiptoed into the rising water. Sybil clapped and Denise gave a wolf whistle.
“I was wondering when you’d join us,” Sybil said. “We’ve been talking about the show.” Her rosy cheeks were shielded by a sun visor. We stared expectantly. “I check in daily with the general manager as trip leader. He manages Hedonism and the Grand Lido. So since we didn’t get to stay at Grand Lido, he’s lined up a tour tomorrow after breakfast. I’m working on getting a show over there Thursday night.” She crossed her fingers and showed us dimples.
“Yeah!” Kelly and Polly said in unison. I forced a smile. Jennifer and Melody high-fived.
“It’s not a done deal, but I’m pretty sure we’ll get it,” Sybil cautioned.
“Why Thursday night?” I asked.
“Good question,” Sybil said. “Hedo has a guest Talent Night Show after dinner. Because we’re staff, we can’t compete in it. Plus, it’d only be one dance. We’d get thirty minutes over at Grand Lido,” she explained.
“Woo-hoo!” Kelly screamed. “Payoff for practicing in that giant smegma Petri dish.” The group said, “Ewww.” “What’s the deal with snorkeling?” she added.
“I’ve confirmed us on the 10:30 a.m. trip,” Sybil said. “We meet at the water-sports shed by the dock at ten fifteen. There’s an added bonus!” she paused, grinning. “You can go Nude or Prude.”
“Shut up! Maybe I’ll wear my birthday suit on my birthday!” Jennifer said, laughing. “I’ll be a mermaid looking for a sexy Italian merman.” Her laughter was contagious.
“Sybil, they sanitize the snorkels, don’t they?” Kelly asked.
“Kelly won’t eat leftover chicken or fish,” Denise informed us.
“If y’all saw what’s out there under a microscope, you wouldn’t either,” Kelly defended her career-induced phobia.
“I’m safe. I brought along my own mask and snorkel,” I bragged.
Kelly stuck out her tongue at me.
“Okay, I’ll give you a free snorkel tip,” I said. “Listerine. If you’ve got Listerine, bring it to clean the mouthpiece.”
Kelly cocked her head like a puzzled puppy. “Really?” she asked.
“Really,” I answered. “They do it all the time on dive boats. And you’ll have minty-fresh breath!”
“I’m going to the gift shop,” Kelly said.
“Now that we’ve got that done, let’s share something about ourselves,” Sybil said. “Kat and Polly are our newest members. We’ve barely gotten to spend any time together the past seven weeks with the flurry of preparing for our trip. Let’s learn something about each other before we go to our first class.”
“I’m an open book,” Polly responded.
“I’m in,” I said to my circle of sisters.
“Why’d you decide to take up belly dancing?” Sybil smiled.
That was easy for me, but I was grateful that I’d have time before she’d shine the spotlight on me. Sybil was looking at Polly.
“I’ve been doing ballet and other dance since I was little,” Polly said. “I love to dance. Eventually, I cheered in high school and hit my wild side. I’d dance down at a teen club in my hot 1960s outfits. After I graduated, I went off to college. As an RN, I joined the navy and still loved to dance at clubs around the world.
“After three bad relationships, two children, and getting my masters, I saw Sybil’s class advertised at the gym. ‘Belly dancer’ sounded like something that’d heal a lot of the damage I’d incurred from hot-tempered men and too much self-sacrifice. I needed to let Polly out to play.” She gave Sybil a serious look. “Thanks to you, Sybil, I’ve reclaimed something from my childhood that I can control—letting me feel pretty but still strong.”
We were amazed at Polly’s ability to get to the kernel of the question. And I was stunned to hear my roommate admit she’d once lost her feminine strength and control.
“I’m so glad you’re a part of us. We wouldn’t be the same without you,” Sybil said before she shifted her gaze. “Jennifer?”
I’d swear that I saw Jennifer’s prom-queen persona float out with the tide and a vulnerable Jessamyn join us.
“Almost all of you know I moved to Charleston in the 1990s after my parents’ retirement, following my sister,” Jennifer said. “We used to vacation on Kiawah Island when my dad worked his television production job. Lara and I loved to dance. During my last few years of high school in New York, I fell in love with Renn Faires—the wench costumes, feathers, and corsets . . .” She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, as if she’d gone back in time for a moment.
“I worked at several between-my-real-jobs after that. Anyway, Lara saw Sybil’s class advertised in The City Paper. She begged me to sign up with her. Within the first year, Sybil pushed me to audition with Lara, and we did,” she said and shrugged.
Sybil laughed. “Yes, you did . . . but your shoe came off halfway through your audition, you used the f-word, and then you apologized while you finished your solo.”
Jennifer chuckled. “Lara was appalled.”
“But you kept going,” Sybil embellished. She looked at Melody. “What about you?”
“I was struggling with a domineering mom and, for some dumb reason, had replaced her with a controlling husband,” Melody said. “During my parenting phase, he escalated to a high-functioning alcoholic. Instead of two children, I had three. While my son finished high school, the drunk increased his criticisms. I couldn’t do anything right. He tore down the way I dressed, how I cut my hair, what I spent. I second-guessed everything until I had a panic attack at work. My boss, thinking it was a heart attack, got me to an emergency room. When the ER doctor said I had an anxietyinduced condition, I knew I couldn’t do this for the rest of my life. I kicked my husband’s drunk ass out, dyed my hair, and bought sexy clothes,” she said, grinning proudly. “Just don’t know why it took me so long.”
The group clapped and cheered.
Melody continued. “One day at lunch, I saw Sybil’s class on the MUSC activities board and signed up. That’s where I met Denise and Kelly. Six months later, when we were working on a short choreography at the clubhouse, I looked in the mirror and saw someone else: a beautiful woman who wanted to whirl and twirl. Belly dancing had made me feel pretty.”
I looked at tall, blue-eyed Melody with a sparkly barrette holding her blond hair back. Her words struck a chord in my search to accept my own wants—not just my needs. Why had it taken us so long to give ourselves permission to drive our lives?
“And here you are in Jamaica doing a solo in our show.” Sybil smiled.
Melody smiled and nodded.
Sybil moved to me. “Kat?”
I took a deep breath, looked at the water, then looked up and started. “My story’s complicated, but it’s basically driven by being told that although I wanted to dance, I wasn’t born to dance. I’m the oldest of four girls from a military family. I took ballet when I was five, but when I didn’t pick up skipping in my first session, I wasn’t signed back up. The subtle message was I couldn’t dance. My mom said it was because we were being transferred.”
“Poor Kat,” Kelly murmured.
“Nah,” I said, trying to protect my mom. “We did move a lot, and I had younger sisters to take care of. Our last move was when I was in eighth grade, after my stepdad was stationed in Charleston. All the way through school I felt forced to watch cheerleaders and dancers with my nose pressed against the glass. My Pentecostal faith bound me with guilt. The church doesn’t approve of dancing or divorce.” I took a breath before the final revelation.