Amber Brown Is Feeling Blue (4 page)

Hannah Burton is a disgusting, mean thing, and I’m not going to let her start a fight that isn’t even there between Kelly and me.

“Kelly Green.” I look at Kelly and say, “It’s really nice to meet you.”

Mrs. Holt smiles and says, “Amber, I want you to be Kelly’s special guide.”

“I was hoping that I could be the guide.” Hannah Burton is using her sweet voice. “After all, Amber has so much to do …. what with her having to devote so much extra time to getting organized.”

And then Hannah Burton whispers something.

I think it’s “…. and having to remember to brush her hair.”

I put my hand to my hair and then remember that my teeth aren’t brushed.

It’s not my fault that Mom and I overslept.

It just happens sometimes to everyone.

Mrs. Holt looks at Hannah. “No, I really want Amber to show Kelly around … but I’m sure that there will be time for you, on your own, to talk with Kelly. It would be NICE of you to be helpful.”

I, Amber Brown, swear that Mrs. Holt put extra emphasis on the word NICE.

It definitely would be nice if Hannah were nice.

I don’t think Hannah Burton has a nice bone in her body.

Actually, she does have nice hair, though …. which she is always fluffing and telling everyone is so nice.

I run my fingers through my hair and then put my hand over my mouth to hide my morning breath, and I say, “I, Amber Brown, would love to show Kelly Green around the school.”

Kelly smiles at me. “And I, Kelly Green, would love to have Amber Brown show me around the school.”

Kelly Green not only has a colorful name, but she has just talked the way that I, Amber Brown, talk. That’s a little weird.

I, Amber Brown, am the only one I know who says things like “I, Amber Brown.” And I, Amber Brown, am getting a headache.

This is not a good day. I can’t believe that so much stuff is happening. Oversleeping ….. not combing my hair … forgetting my homework.

This day is turning into a nightmare.

Maybe I’ll get lucky and this will really be a nightmare.

Maybe I didn’t oversleep this morning. Maybe I haven’t gotten up yet, and this is all just a very bad dream.

I, Amber Brown, pinch myself really hard and hope that this is just a nightmare and that my mom will soon wake me up for
real. And I won’t have overslept. And I will have combed my hair. And I won’t have morning mouth. And I won’t have left my homework at home. And Kelly Green will only be part of a very bad dream.

The pinch hurts. It really hurts, really really hurts.

This is not a bad dream.

This is my life.

I, Amber Brown, am giving Kelly Green a minitour, the one from the classroom to the lunchroom.

She is telling me about herself. “I just love my parents. My daddy is a lawyer, and my mom is an accountant …. but she’s staying home to take care of my little sister, Linda.”

I’m glad that they didn’t name her sister Lime …. Lime Green.

“And,” she continues, “we have a new baby brother. He’s so cute, and I help take care of him.”

I ask her if his name is Oliver, Olive Green, for short.

She giggles. “No, silly. His name is Joey. Do you have brothers and sisters?”

“Nope,” I say. “I’m an only child.”

“That’s so sad,” Kelly says.

“I don’t think so.” I don’t know why, but I want to step on Kelly’s shoes, which look brand new. “I like being an only child.”

I don’t think Kelly should say that it’s sad that I’m an only child.

I don’t tell anyone that sometimes I do wish I had a younger brother or sister but that I don’t think that’s ever going to happen.

Next she tells me about her sheepdog.

I, Amber Brown, tell her that my mom is allergic to dogs …. and probably to sheep, too.

“Oh, that’s so sad. Your mom would probably be allergic to our cat, Fluffy, too.” She frowns.

I don’t tell her that I think Fluffy is a stupid name for a cat.

I don’t know why Kelly Green is annoying me, but she is. She’s got two parents who are still together, a sheepish dog …… a fluffy cat ….. probably her brother and sister are fluffy, too. Her life sounds so perfect…. I bet she never oversleeps … or has morning mouth.

I bet she thinks her name is so perfect, too … but I don’t.

I continue giving the tour to Kelly as we walk to lunch. “And this is the nurse’s office. If you don’t mind, I need to stop here for a minute.”

“Sure.” Kelly giggles.

Kelly Green giggles a lot.

Sometimes I don’t know why.

She just giggles.

I rush into the nurse’s office and beg Mrs. McDowell for an “emergency toothbrush.”

She hands me a package filled with a toothbrush and a tiny tube of toothpaste. She also hands me a comb.

Mrs. McDowell is prepared for any emergency.

I’m so glad that the PTA gives her some extra money so that she can buy stuff like this.

I rush into the bathroom and brush ….. and comb.

My teeth are so glad that she’s got the toothbrush and toothpaste.

And I bet everyone who can smell my clean breath will be so glad.

My hair is also happy.

I come out of the bathroom and watch a little kid barf all over Mrs. McDowell’s desk. It’s the same kid who barfed when we had the skunk smell in our school.

I watch Kelly watch the kid barf, and then I watch Kelly barf.

The kid barfs again…..

Oh, great….. Ping-Pong barf.

The nightmare continues.

I, Amber Brown, don’t barf, but this whole scene is making me feel pretty sick.

Mrs. McDowell is busy holding the little kid’s head.

He’s still barfing.

I just want to get out of there. I don’t know what to do.

Kelly helps me decide. “You better go to lunch now, Amber. I guess I won’t be having
lunch after all. I think I have to go home. I always get sick when I see someone else get sick.”

I look at her.

She’s got barf dripping down her clothes and on her shoes.

Kelly Green is not giggling now.

I bet they were new clothes, because this is her first day of school here.

I, Amber Brown, feel bad for Kelly Green, but I’m glad that she’s going home.

That’ll give me another day to get used to her being in my class.

I leave the nurse’s office, go into the cafeteria, buy my lunch, and go over to the table.

Brandi is saving two seats, one for me and one for Kelly.

I whisper to her and tell her what’s happened.

“Wow,” she says. “What a lousy way to start at a new school. I’m not even going to do a bulletin about this. It would only make her feel bad.”

Brandi just moved here a year ago, so she always worries about new kids. She wants to become a television reporter, and practices
by announcing news bulletins whenever she can.

Hal Henry comes over to our table. “Where’s Kelly?”

Tiffani Shroeder looks at Hal. “Why? Do you want to ask her out?”

Hal blushes. “Get real. We’re only in fourth grade. The only people you know who date are your Barbie and Ken dolls.”

It’s Tiffani’s turn to blush. She hates it when someone teases her about her Barbie and Ken dolls.

Everyone does, though …. especially her little brother, who is always beheading her Barbies.

Hal explains: “She’s my new next-door neighbor, and her mom makes the best cookies. She promised to give me some for lunch. So, why isn’t she here? Did you give her an elevator pass and tell her to find the elevator?”

When Hal first got to the school, that’s what one of the sixth-graders did to him.

Sometimes Hal Henry can be very gullible.

I tell him that Kelly’s gone home, that she got sick from watching the little kid barf. “Kelly got so sick … her face turned green.”

I think about what I’ve just said, and think it’s kind of funny. Kelly’s name is Green. Her face looked a little green …. and then very pale …. but first it looked green. Even her puke looked a little green. I wonder what she ate for breakfast.

Then I tell him how it was like Ping-Pong barf.

Hal laughs and then rushes off to tell everyone else what I’ve just told him.

“Kelly has turned really Green!”

Then I hear him say something about Ping-Pong barf, and all the boys laugh.

Brandi looks at me. “Amber.”

“Yes?” I ask.

“That wasn’t very nice.” She frowns. “Now everyone is going to tease her.”

I feel bad. I didn’t mean to do anything that would make kids tease Kelly.

Sometimes I think Brandi worries too much and thinks that things are going to happen when they don’t.

Part of me feels really bad.

I didn’t mean to do something that would make trouble for Kelly and get her teased.

I, Amber Brown, know what it’s like to be teased about a name.

However, I’m having a bad day.

And it’s partly her fault.

So, can I help it if she’s having a bad day, too?

I’m not the one who made her vomit.

I just told other people what happened.

Maybe now that they know, they’ll send her a get-well card.

I give my lunch to Hal to make up for the cookie.

The lunch bell rings, and it’s time to go back to class.

Mrs. Holt gives us an assignment to do a project about the Middle Ages. At first I think she’s talking about people who are not young anymore and not yet old …. kind of like my parents and Max …. the middle ages.

But she explains that it’s the Middle Ages, like in the olden days.

“By tomorrow I want you to turn in a paper explaining what your project is going to be.”

Brandi whispers to me, “I’m going to phone Kelly when I go home, and give her the homework assignment.”

I just hope they don’t end up best friends and I’ll be best friendless.

Mrs. Holt gives us a surprise quiz in math.

If she gives extra credit for erasing and
crossing out, then there’s a chance that I passed the quiz. Otherwise, there’s not much of a chance.

I lost my favorite good-luck pencil.

And then Brandi, Tiffani, Naomi, and I get detention for talking.

I already stay after school for Elementary Extension, because my mom can’t pick me up until later. So, to make it a punishment, I have to go into a different room and just sit quietly, not able to do my homework or anything.