Always on My Mind (33 page)

She glanced at Ingrid, who nodded, an enigmatic expression on her face.

“Casper needs someone who believes in him. Who can see the genius in his ideas. Who can stick by him when he fails
 
—and wins.”

“I’m sorry I hurt him
 
—”

“Oh, sweetie, we’re so over that. Casper is a big boy; he just
needed time. And let’s not forget Owen’s part in all of this.” She stared out at the lake. “By the way, although I’m so thankful that we’ll get to be Layla’s grandparents, I can appreciate the courage it took to offer her up for adoption. It’s a true act of love.”

Raina didn’t know why, but somehow hearing that confirmation from Ingrid balmed her still-open wound.

“I tried to forget her, but I couldn’t.”

“Forget her? Oh, Raina, a mother would never forget her child, even if someone else raised her. She’d always be in your heart.”

Like Casper had said about her. “Do you think . . . do you think Casper meant what he said? About praying for me?”

“Of course I did.” Casper came up behind her, settled his hands on her shoulders. Leaned down to kiss her cheek. “Hey, Mom.”

Ingrid got up and gave Casper a kiss. “Just talking to your girl here. So glad you two finally worked it out.” She patted him on the cheek. “I’m going over to the hospital with your father to pick up Tiger. Darek will stay here until Ivy and Joy are discharged in a couple days. How about if we meet you back at the resort?” She leaned down and caught Raina in a quick embrace, then backed away, smiling. “
Both
of you.”

Casper sat down opposite her, in his mother’s seat. He looked
 
—and smelled
 
—freshly showered but unshaven, his hair in wet curls. “I prayed for you all the time, that you would see how much God loves you.”

“Even after what I said to you?”

“About God not loving you? Or noticing you? The crazy idea that you are nothing to Him? Yeah, I remember that because it burned a hole in me. Nothing could be further from the truth, Raina.”

She studied his face, those blue eyes so earnest, and a bud of
hope opened in her. Maybe God
did
notice her. After all, He’d sent this amazing man into her life, refused to let him leave.

“See, what you don’t know is, I’m only following in God’s footsteps, picking up the clues He’s dropped for me,” Casper said, taking her hand, his thumb running over it, curls of warmth weaving up her arm.

“‘For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost’
 
—it’s from the Bible. God is all about finding lost treasures, and He took me on the quest with Him. Raina, God loves you, and He’s not willing for you to think for one moment He has forgotten you. You are always on His mind.”

Her throat tightened, but . . . maybe . . .

“You thought you could use your mistakes
 
—and even your anger
 
—to hide from God. But we can’t hide from God
 
—nor should we. Because why should we hide from Someone who wants so much joy for us? So much light?”

Light. Yes, that’s what Casper had made her see
 
—light. Hope. Forgiveness.

Love.

She saw it now
 
—the relentless pursuit of a God who believed her valuable enough to put Layla
 
—and Casper
 
—into her life.

Not forgotten.

Seen.

“And He appeared every single day in Thor’s devotion, his leading, his affirmation to look forward, into light.”

She made to run her fingers under her eye to catch the tear, but Casper’s thumb did it for her.

“I love you, Casper. And I think . . . I think God put you in my life to help me see that I don’t have to be lost. Not anymore.”

“I promise I’m never going to let you go.” He pulled her onto
his lap, cupped his hand on her cheek, turned her face to his, and kissed her. He tasted of coffee, smelled of home, and yet had enough wildness in his touch to remind her that their great adventure was just beginning.

M
ELTING ICICLES DRIPPED
like tears from the roof of the lodge to the deck, sparkling against the sunshine, the bright blue of the day. The thaw had dented the snowpack along the walk to the lake, and the fragrance of spring hung light, faint hope in the air.

Somehow Deep Haven had survived the deep freeze of the century.

“She’s late,” Casper said from where he stood at the fireplace, staring at the flames.

Raina watched him. Already a pensive father, awaiting his daughter’s arrival. His dress shirt stretched against his wide shoulders, although he rolled up the sleeves. And he probably needed a haircut, his curls long and scraping his collar.

Nah. She liked how he tucked his renegade self behind the tailored facade of a manager. For now.

“Where could she be?”

“Dori will be here,” Raina said, walking over to take his hand. He drew hers to his lips, kissed it, worry in his eyes.

Except what did he have to worry about? Casper had a natural way with kids. Even infants, who seemed to coo and giggle the moment he took them in his arms. But Raina
 
—well, what if she hadn’t a clue what to do with a three-month-old infant? She couldn’t exactly show up on the Christiansens’ doorstep at 2 a.m., right?

Her expression must have betrayed her because Casper dropped her hand, cradled her face, and met her eyes. “You’ll be great.” He gave her a quick kiss despite the fact that his father sat there in a recliner, reading the paper, his mother in the kitchen. She could hear Jace and Max talking hockey in the den, the crew from Minneapolis having driven up together after the Blue Ox’s last home game.

Tiger sat at the counter, coloring, Grace occupying him so Ivy could get some sleep. She’d dozed off on the sofa.

Eden held baby Joy, rocking her quietly in the corner. Raina gave it six months, if that, before Eden and Jace announced their own happy news.

The door opened, and Raina looked up, her heart falling when she spotted Darek in the entryway, stamping his feet. “We had a logjam on the road, but I got it cleared. It’s a bit of a muddy soup out there.”

“First thing we do when I get the Rothe check is pave the lot,” Casper said.

Raina expected protest out of Darek at the idea of taking the money from the finder’s fee Casper offered, his pride maybe getting in the way, but he simply nodded. “We could put a new roof on the lodge too. We still have some cinder damage.”

She could still reel in disbelief at the reward distribution from Aggie’s bonds. One million nearly a century ago had multiplied to $20 million today, and 10 percent still made for a hefty, generous addition to the Evergreen purse and Casper’s own checkbook.

Better, however, was listening to Casper regale his family with the story, every step of the mystery, and watching their faces as they realized Casper’s brilliance. Which, of course, she’d known all along.

Casper, in his generosity, even set up an account for Raina and Layla, although she planned on keeping her job at the antique shop, at least part-time.

And sure, Monte had shown up, tried to claim the bonds as his, but Penny Townsend shut him down so fast it would have made her grandmother cheer from the grave.

Monte vanished from Deep Haven then, and Raina hadn’t seen him since.

Darek kissed his sleeping wife on the forehead, then went over to Eden.

The doorbell chimed, deep and resonant, and Casper took Raina’s hand.

“I’ll get it,” Grace said, heading to the door. Raina couldn’t help but start to follow.

She stopped as Dori came in, holding a baby carrier. The social worker handed it to Grace. “Sorry. The drive took longer than I thought.”

But Raina had forgotten her, watching as Grace brought in her daughter. Layla lay asleep, strapped in and dressed in pink, her head covered by a bunny hat with fuzzy white ears.

Grace set the carrier down, and Raina knelt before it, began to undo the straps.

Layla woke, yawned, her perfect little mouth sideways. She
stretched, her back arching as Raina took her out and held her to her shoulder.

“She’ll probably be hungry soon,” Dori said, handing Grace a baby bag. “There’s some formula in there, along with fresh diapers.”

Layla began to fuss, wriggling in Raina’s arms, tiny snorts and hiccups of unhappiness coming from her body. Suddenly she lit out in a howl.

“Oh!” Raina held her as she struggled, Layla’s body writhing as she worked herself into a lather.

On the sofa, Ivy stirred, and from across the room, Joy began to mimic Layla.

Raina glanced at Casper. See? What was she thinking
 
—?

Suddenly Ingrid’s hand landed on her shoulder. “Just tuck her in close and bounce her a little. Babies like that.” She kissed Layla on the forehead even as Raina tried not to give in to the urge to pass her off. “I’ll fix her bottle.”

Raina turned Layla in her arms, swaying her body back and forth, walking to the window.
Please, don’t cry. Don’t cry.

She could hear Dori behind her, talking to Casper and the family, discovering Raina’s plans. How she might move into cabin one to be close to the family and child care, but separate, at least until Casper returned from finding Owen.

He left that last part out when talking to Dori, but she knew that as soon as she and Layla felt ready, he planned on leaving.

She refused to think about it. But yes, she agreed that Owen deserved to know about his daughter, and Casper wanted to be the one to tell him. And as he put it, ask permission to marry the mother of Owen’s child.

Layla had stopped howling, but she whimpered in Raina’s arms, gearing up for another outburst.

“Here you go,” Ingrid said, handing Raina a warm bottle. “Sit over here.” She pointed to a rocking chair that faced the deck. “It’s where I fed all my babies.”

The rocking chair held a knit blanket that Ingrid settled over Raina’s lap as she sat, propped up Layla, and gave her the bottle. Her daughter slurped it down as if ravenous.

“See, you’re a natural,” Ingrid said to Raina. Then she leaned over the baby. “And you are precious.” She tweaked Layla’s little foot. Layla met her eyes and smiled around the nipple of the bottle. Blue eyes. She had the rich blue eyes of the Christiansen clan.

But the black hair belonged to Raina.

Layla reached up, curled her hand around Raina’s thumb.

Raina’s eyes filled, and she began to rock, a song filling her chest. Something sweet she couldn’t yet name.
“Hush, little baby . . .”

Casper knelt beside her, met her eyes. “She’s beautiful, Raina.”

Yes. A dark beauty.

“I think you’re all set here, Raina,” Dori said.

Casper got up and shook Dori’s hand as if he were making a deal, a little flummoxed.

Yeah, well, life had them all off-kilter with joy.

Raina finished feeding Layla, burping her on her shoulder.

“Can I hold her?” Casper asked, and she handed over her package, caught in the sweetness of his expression as he cradled the baby.

Yes, this was a moment with no regrets. Large. Light.

“Oh no, Dori left her scarf,” Eden said, picking up the orange knit scarf from the entryway. She set it on the counter.

Amelia came down the stairs, wearing a dress, leggings, tall black boots. She stopped at the landing, her expression bright as her gaze landed on Layla. “Wow, really? I missed it?”

“That’s what you get for primping. What happened to sweatshirts and yoga pants?” Grace said as Amelia walked over to Layla, held out her finger for the baby to grasp.

“I’m trying to class up the joint,” Amelia said.

“She has a hot date,” Eden said from the kitchen, where she was now mashing the potatoes. Jace, her husband, walked from the other room, gave Amelia a low whistle, then eased the masher from Eden’s hand.

“No good, pal,” Max said. “Let the master work.” He retrieved cream cheese and milk from the fridge and bumped Jace out of the way.

“I don’t have a hot date. It’s just me and Seth hanging out. He’s home for spring break and wanted to get together. Don’t set me a place
 
—we’re going out for burgers.”

“I think he’s still carrying a torch for you, honey.” This from Ingrid, who carried plates to the table.

“I always thought you two would end up together,” Grace said. “You were so cute when you dated in high school.”

“Maybe someday, but I’m not ready for another relationship. Not yet.” She left the rest unsaid, but Raina caught Amelia’s exchange of glances with Casper. Amelia dumped her purse on the counter, ran back upstairs.

John got up and walked over to look at Layla. “She has Christiansen eyes,” he said. He winked at Raina, his expression tender.

The doorbell rang and Grace went to answer it. “Probably Dori.”

Ingrid added silverware to the table. But as she looked up at Grace, she stilled.

Grace was backing into the room, still holding the orange scarf. Behind her followed a man about Casper’s age, although taller,
with curly dark hair, a two-day layer of whiskers, and piercing blue eyes. He wore a white oxford, a suit coat over faded jeans.

And then he opened his mouth. “I’m looking for Miss Amelia Christiansen.” Crisp British vowels, sharpened to an aristocratic point.

Clearly not from the hamlet of Deep Haven. The entire family stared at him.

Amelia appeared at the top of the stairs, her hand gripping the railing. “Roark.” Her voice emerged as a thin wisp.

Casper handed Raina back the baby. She glanced at him
 
—something had his burr up.

Amelia came down the stairs, a little white. “What are you doing here?”

No one moved as Roark turned to her. “Amelia, darling, I’m so sorry for the way I bumbled everything. But I believe I have it sorted now and . . .”

Casper took a step closer, stood next to his father. Raina had the eerie sense that redcoat Roark might have just walked into the heavily armed camp of revolutionary patriots.

But he apparently paid them no mind as he moved to the bottom of the stairs. “I’ve come to ask for your forgiveness.”

Amelia took another step down the stairs. “What are you doing here?”

Raina ducked the crazy urge to wave him off.

Then stopped as he reached into his suit coat and pulled out a small box. “Just a token, darling, but I came to say that I can’t get you off my mind. I love you terribly. Please, won’t you give us another chance?”