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“Fay Hopkins.
”

I rose slowly and stood, looking at the judge, awaiting my fate. I prayed his next words showed me mercy that I myself hadn’t bestowed upon anyone in the last year. I had been bitter and angry, and no one was safe from my wrath. Especially not Clara. I closed my eyes as I remembered all the things I’d said to her.

“Miss Hopkins, it is the decision of this court that you be dishonorably discharged for your actions on…”

I tuned out the rest, but got the gist. Oh…what was I going to do now? I had nowhere to go. The
military was all I had. Pastor and Mrs. Ruth weren’t my family like they were Clara’s. I barely knew them. Clara had run off and married some idiot boy and they moved. I had her last letter. I’m sure she thought I never kept them, but I did.

I had no choice but to eat a ton of
crow and go find her. Who knew—she may not even want me now. I may have waited too long. I
was
really angry with her. I mean, I still was. She did get the easy street in all this and then wanted me to put Band-Aids on everything like when we were little and make everything better. But she was too naïve to see that everything wasn’t going to be better.

And I was young, too. It wasn’t my responsibility to deal with.

The judge’s gavel banging made me jump and he glared at me for daydreaming. “I see even now that nothing gets through to you. You’re dismissed. I hope once you get home and are surrounded by people you know and are used to that it can help you to see that the world isn’t out to get you, Miss Hopkins. The world is actually a pretty fair place.”

I felt the scoff rising from
my soul. “Not from where I stand.”

I turned, grabbing my bag, and left without a backward look.

_________

My Jetta made it about a hundred miles past the Montana state line before the en
gine gave out. I was almost completely out of cash, hadn’t slept properly in days, hadn’t eaten a real meal that wasn’t from a gas station in I didn’t know how long. I left my car smoking on the side of road and shook my head as I headed across the street to the motel. The difference between a motel and a hotel was night and day in small towns like this. It could mean the difference between getting sliced in the middle of the night, but it was all that I could see.

I prayed—again with the praying, like someone was listening—that there was a room for less than thirty dollars. Otherwise, I was screwed. Because I only had thirty-five dollars to my name and that five dollars was my dinner for the night. Tomorrow would have to worry about itself.

A car honked as it barely missed me, skidding past on the road behind me. I didn’t even know what town I was in. I just knew I was close to Clara. I opened the door, the chime of the doorbell and the smell of muck and cigarettes slamming into me. I coughed, offending the young attendant. He scowled at me and cocked his head. “Can I help you, duchess?”

“Do you have a room, please?” I asked in my most pleading, small voice.

He thought, pausing. “For the night or for the week?”

“Just for the night.”

“Working girl?” He smiled. I tried not to cringe.

“No. Just traveling through on my way to see my sister.”

His look of interest went away and so did my hope of getting a room. “Seventy-nine plus tax.”

“Please…is there anything cheaper than that?”

“You can take the room or get out of here. I ain’t running a charity.”

I sighed and turne
d to go. I could sleep in my car, I just didn’t want to. As soon as I got inside, I tried to lock the doors, but my battery was dead. The automatic doors locks wouldn’t work; nothing did, with the battery dead. I sighed again and laughed. It turned hysterical as I laid my head on the steering wheel.

Nothing was working out for me anymore. Nothing. The world was giving me the big middle finger. I deserved it. I leaned back and hoped that no one messed with me while I slept. I couldn’t even lay my seat back because the seat was powered. So I sat there and closed my eyes, trying to forget my
mess of a life for a moment so I could sleep.

Eventually, I did sleep. I dreamt someone was touching me. I moved my face toward his hand and he chuckled. That seemed to wake me and I opened my eyes to find the motel attendant crouching down next to me with my car door open. I opened my mouth, but before I could scream or say anything, he covered it
roughly with his hand. I could tell my eyes were as wide as tangerines. He smiled at me and said softly, “It’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you.”

I scoffed beneath his hand and his smile widened. He gripped my arm and tugged me out of my car and pressed me to the side of it.

“I’ll give you a place to stay for the night. No charge. You give me a little something in return, okay?” I shook my head hard under his hand and he gripped me to stop it. “No harm, no foul. You need a place to stay and I like you. What’s the problem?” I mumbled under his palm. He laughed a little. “No screaming, beautiful.”

My skin literally crawled under my clothes as he let his hand slide from my mouth
to my neck. “I said I’m not into that kind of thing. I’m fine in my car, but thanks.”

I waited, my breath pulling from my lungs painfully.

“Ah, honey,” he drawled and I knew it was over, “this isn’t a negotiation.”

I turned to run, but he had a handful of my hair before I co
uld get anywhere. I used my elbow to his gut and he ‘
oophed
’, which just upset him more. He was a lot bigger than me. He opened the backdoor of my car and tried to shove me in. I knew if he got me in there, I wasn’t coming back out. So I fought as hard as I could, used every bit of training I could recall, but honestly, I’d done basic training and that was it. People thought just because you were in the military that you were some kind of killing machine. That’s not what it meant at all.

When I got a good palm jab to his nose, he cursed and that was it for me. Any bit of gentleness he’d been reserving for me was gone. He held my arm behind my back and yanked the handful of hair in his fist so tight that I saw stars.
“You little b—”

“What have we here?”

We both turned to look at the man who was standing near the back of the car. He had an accent and looked like death warmed over. He was pale and disheveled; his hair was a mess and his clothes wrinkled and dirty. He stared at me, his mouth open, and though he seemed to be trying to help me, he also seemed to be enraptured and licked his lip more than once as he looked between the man and me.

“None of your business,” the man barked. “Scram.”

The interrupter looked at me and watched. His eyes…were purple. I could see that even in the darkness. He licked his bottom lip again, but gave me an almost sad look as he began to back away. A sob escaped my throat at the fact that I’d never reach Clara, never get to tell her that I was sorry, that I’d been wrong to blame her just because I happened to be older when our parents died. Of course I’d been given more responsibility. Of course people were going to expect more from me. But she’d never know that I loved her. She’d never know.

Another sob rose when my captor actually chuckled, realizing that my rescuer wasn’t rescuing me at all, but was backing away. I had nothing left to hold back for, so I let is all go. It bubbled up and my ches
t ached so hard. The guy who had interrupted us gasped and looked at me over his shoulder, his eyes lidded, and he swayed. I was so confused as to what was going on, but it didn’t matter. He wasn’t helping me and the man wasn’t waiting any longer. He turned to put me in the car. I started to fight, but no matter how hard I fought, he was overpowering me. He raised his arm back, slapping my cheek and then slamming his fist into my gut when I kept fighting. I could barely breathe through the pain as I gagged and gasped. That effectively ended all movement from me.

“Now
, stop fighting me,” he growled and pushed me back into the car, lifting my legs. “I’m actually a good guy once you get to know me.”

Then he was gone. I gasped at the sudden movement and clasped my stomach, finally able to breathe and get some relief. The interrupter stood there, one arm outst
retched into the air, which he’d slung the man off with.

“I somehow doubt that,” he said, his voice grating.

He fell to his knees, looking worse than I did somehow. I looked between the two of them, one way across the road sprawled on the sidewalk, and one on his knees as he held on to his last bit of alertness. He swayed and stared up at me. “If you want to wait for him to wake up, then that’s fine, but I suggest that we go.”

“We?”
I breathed.

“I don’t think it’s a secret that I’m not exactly…doing so hot.” He swayed again, catching himself on his fist in the dirt. I moved forward to put my hands on his shoulders to help steady him. “Where are you staying tonight? Your car’s done for,” he stated the ever-so-obvious.

“I didn’t have enough for a room,” I told him softly. I leaned down to look at his face. “I was sleeping in my car.”

“Help me up.”

Under normal circumstances, I would have told him to go to hell, but he had just saved me and he was obviously distressed himself…to some degree. I didn’t know what was wrong with him, but I couldn’t walk away after he’d helped me. I pulled on his arm until he was standing over me. He looked down at me, seeming to study me. He looked like he was starving. He took the ends of my hair in between his fingers and rubbed it for a few seconds before letting it fall.

“I need something from you.”

I sighed, my hope falling all over again. “I’m not having sex with you—”

“Not that. Come on. I’ll get us a room.”

“I’m not…”

He started to turn. “I need you to help me. I haven’t fed in so long.
I’m weak. Get me to the motel room. I’ll get you dinner and a place to stay if you’ll just help me without question.”

I stalled.
He hadn’t fed? That was a weird way to say he hadn’t eaten. He growled. Actually growled. “Why would I save you only to hurt you myself?” Good point. “Besides, I can barely walk. I’m not going to be of any use to a woman tonight.” He grinned devilishly and I knew that when he was at his best, all cleaned up and on his game, he was a force to be reckoned with. “You’re safe...for now.”

I sighed, biting my lip and knowing
that this was my only chance at getting to see Clara again.

“Fine.” I leaned down and
put my shoulder under his arm and helped pull him up. I looked over to see my attacker still out cold on the pavement. But his breath puffed in the chilled night air, so I knew he was alive. I shook my head and looked over at the man  I was holding. I hadn’t realized how tall he was, or how close he was. I tried to move back some but there was nowhere to go unless I let him go. I sighed, my puff of breath meeting his in the small space between us as he stared down at me. He seemed puzzled by something. Almost an angry puzzlement, like he was fascinated and couldn’t stop, but didn’t like what he was finding.

“Let’s get a room, blue
eyes.”

“Fay,” I said and gulped at how affected it sounded. I coughed and hoisted him up a little as I started to help him across the street. “And if you think I’m sleeping in the same bed with you—”

“I don’t sleep. I just need to rest. The chair will do just fine.”

“You don’t sleep,” I drawled
and didn’t believe a word of it. “You look as if you could keel over at any minute, buddy.”

“As soon as I feed, I’ll be fine.”

“Then let’s eat first,” I insisted because I was starving and if he was offering up a free meal, I was taking. Though by the looks of him, I didn’t know how he was doing so badly if he had the means and money to take care of himself. Why not just go eat if he was so hungry? “Let’s grab something quick at the diner at the motel. That okay with you?”

“Whatever, blue
eyes,” he grumbled and closed his eyes as he let me guide him. When we came to the diner’s door, a mother and her child were coming out. The little girl was crying about something, obviously upset. The mom was coddling her in an amused but exasperated way that showed she’d been at it for a while. “You can’t only eat pie for dinner. It doesn’t work that way, Carline.”