Read Alone with the Dead: A PC Donal Lynch Thriller Online
Authors: James Nally
King’s College Hospital, South London
Thursday, August 8, 1991; 10:10
I sat in the waiting room of King’s College’s Institute of Psychiatry, blaming the clock for every lost second, occasionally aloud – which alarmed only some of my fellow out-patients.
My consultation with Lilian had been scheduled for ten a.m. The clock said ten past.
I had until, at a push, eight o’clock tonight to fillet the Marion Ryan murder file and throw a bone at Shep. It needed to be a meaty one at that. His promise to make me Acting DC had been just that, a verbal promise. If I failed to deliver a fresh clue to support his domestic theory, he could renege on my promotion. And I was short on comeback.
I thought back to our last ‘consultation’: Lilian’s endless stock questions, me galloping round in circles like an unbroken horse. Unqualified shrink meets uncooperative patient: what, realistically, were we ever going to achieve? I came to see her the first time as a favour to Gabby. I’d paid my dues. There was nothing in it for me now.
‘Fuck it,’ I said, standing suddenly. The waiting room recoiled as one. I bolted.
Halfway up Denmark Hill, I heard the unmistakable, ‘
Doner?
’
I looked up to see Lilian jogging towards me.
‘Security alert! Couldn’t even get on a train for an hour,’ she panted, shooting down in flames any grievance I might have had. There was only one cause of security alerts in London: the Provisional IRA. Or, as senior police officers used to hilariously joke: ‘One of your lot, Paddy.’ With innocent English bodies piling up, it was hard to cry foul.
The ice maiden’s skin looked flushed, her forehead damp.
‘Are you okay?’ I asked.
She blinked often and hard.
‘You weren’t going to come back, were you?’
‘Yes … no … look Lilian, everything’s changed.’
She looked me in the eye, properly, possibly for the first time.
‘I’ve been brought onto a murder squad as Acting DC. Guess which case?’
Her lips parted slightly.
I nodded: ‘Marion Ryan’s murder.’
She looked unsettled, maybe even unnerved.
‘Which means I’m bound to get back to the murder scene. If I do, and she attacks me again, won’t that prove something?’
She let my question bounce off her. Lilian Krul wouldn’t even entertain the notion that I had some inexplicable, illogical, unscientific spiritual connection with Marion Ryan. The very thought offended her logical mind.
I worried that even hard evidence wouldn’t sway her.
‘Congratulations,’ she said finally, politely, as if I’d just beaten her at tennis.
‘My new boss wants me to go through all the statements and paperwork today. I’ve got to report to him tonight,’ I said, checking my watch and pulling an apologetic face.
‘What about our work?’ she frowned, inspecting me without a blink.
‘I’m not sure I’ll have time … this is a big break for me, Lilian.’
She nodded, so I kept going, ‘And the last meeting felt, well, it just felt like we were going over the same old ground.’
She blinked once, slowly, almost ceremonially. The muscles in her cheeks clenched: ‘You know something, Doner, I’ve been spending day and night researching your case, tracking down papers, reports, books, talking to experts all hours of the day and night, all over the world. I didn’t even go on holiday in the end. I spent it all working. On
your
case. And you continue to act like you’re doing
me
a favour. You show no faith in me or my work, or respect. I’m tired of it. You’re right, let’s just call it a day. I wouldn’t want to waste any more of your precious time.’
That was easy
, I thought. ‘Really?’ I said.
‘It’s just a shame, as I think I’ve made a breakthrough.’
She visibly relished my renewed eagerness.
‘What have you found?’
‘I’ve found a condition that seems to fit your experiences. I worked all week to get it ready for today but … it doesn’t matter. You’ve got more important …’
‘What? What is it?’
I almost grabbed her by the arms in excitement.
‘It has a name?’
‘Yes, it has a name and there are ways to manage the condition. But look, we can’t talk here.’
‘My God, this is amazing news,’ I said, ‘all I’ve ever wanted was to be able to call it something. What is it?’
‘I know you’ve got to run,
Doner
. Maybe now you’ll come back next week?’
I shook my head in disbelief but laughed to hide my anger.
‘I’m here, now,’ I said, trying to sound calm, ‘why don’t you tell me now?’
I spotted a café, pointed to it: ‘Come on.’
We sat at a cold metal table, face to face.
‘Well?’ I demanded.
She reached into her shiny black leather bag, grabbing a chunky bale of academia.
‘According to these studies, you suffer from something as old as humanity itself, yet it’s only starting to get proper scientific recognition now.
‘In Newfoundland, they call it the Old Hag. In China it’s called
Gui Ya
, which means Ghost Pressure.’
She even did that thing of pronouncing it in a Chinese accent.
‘In the West Indies, he’s called
Kokma
, the ghost baby that bounces on your chest and attacks your throat. The Norwegians call it
Mer
which is where we get the term “nightmare”. There’s a famous painting called
The Nightmare
, hanging in the Royal Academy, showing exactly this phenomenon.
‘In the last couple of years, this condition has been scientifically defined as sleep paralysis.’
‘Sleep paralysis,’ I repeated, ‘right.’
I’d read about apnoea and narcolepsy. At least they sounded sexy. Sleep paralysis? I’d been expecting something less specific, more complex, in Latin. Or named after some fearsome Germanic boffin, a Münchausen or a Heimlich. Sleep paralysis sounded too matter-of-fact, like glue ear or athlete’s foot or irritable bowel syndrome.
‘What makes you think it’s sleep paralysis?’
‘You exhibit all the classic signs,’ she argued, seemingly bemused by my lack of enthusiasm.
‘And they are?’
‘Well it’s a complex area.’
‘Try me. But feel free to skip over the complex stuff.’
‘Okay, well, you probably know what REM is? It’s that dreaming period of sleep when your eyes twitch violently under your eyelids?’
She was now torturing me by going up at the end of her sentences.
‘Rapid Eye Movement is when we have our most vivid dreams. You’re supposed to have non-dreaming sleep first. Then you go into REM sleep six or seven times during a night’s sleep.
‘During REM, the brain sends your body into paralysis, so that you don’t act out your dreams. It’s most likely that when you doze off, REM comes to you too quickly, before you’re properly asleep. Or, sometimes when you wake in the middle of the night, REM doesn’t snap off.
‘In either case, your body’s awake, but your mind is dreaming. What you’re seeing are dream images superimposed on waking images. As you can imagine, this is really common in narcoleptics.’
‘No, Lilian,’ I laughed, a little too desperately, ‘I don’t think you understand. Meehan was
real.
Marion is
real
. I can see her, I can feel her touch. I can smell her.’
‘Yes, they are real to you, same as the Old Hag is real. A dream is always real while you’re in it. It’s only when you wake up you realise it isn’t.’
I felt a surge of resentment. How dare she trivialise my real, terrifying, other-worldly episodes with such trite explanations.
‘So if these are just dream images, why do I feel so terrified?’
She leafed through her papers until she came across a colour-coded picture of the human brain.
‘There are two things about dreams, they tend to make no sense and they tend to be negative.’
You don’t say
, I thought.
‘Look,’ she said, pointing to a part of the brain.
‘When we dream, our pre-frontal cortex, this bit we use for logic and language, to make sense of things, is switched off. But the middle brain lights up. That’s the part of the brain that controls emotions. See this bit?’
Her sharp, scarlet fingernail tapped what looked like a crinkled testicle.
‘This is the amygdala. The philosopher, René Descartes believed that the amygdala was the seat of our soul. It’s actually the seat of our fear. This is on full alert when we sleep. This is why our dreams are almost always scary.’
I got up and walked around to her side of the table for a better look, if only to slow her down.
But she was on a roll: ‘The amygdala is the “fight-or-flight” part of our brain. The bit that weighs up an immediate threat. Now, remember, this in a high state of alert when you dream.’
I had remembered.
‘Now, think of your condition: you are lying there, you think you’re awake because you can see your room and your belongings, but your brain is in REM, so your body is in paralysis, you’re finding it hard to breathe. Your amygdala is in a state of high alert, which means you’re terrified. Fear is an inherent part of the experience. The feeling of terror comes, then the bogeyman. Your visual cortex has to justify the terror you feel, so it creates an image of the thing you fear most. Two thousand years ago, people saw demons. Two hundred years ago they saw witches. These days, they see aliens.’
‘I don’t see aliens,’ I protested, ‘and I can
feel
Marion! I can feel her skin. I could feel Meehan strangling me.’
‘The strangling sensation is because the paralysis makes it hard for you to breathe. Your throat and chest muscles are frozen, so it feels like there’s something pressing down on your chest and your throat. It’s your brain that decides what that something is.’
My mind raced. I had to accept that, when Tony Meehan attacked me in hospital, he was definitely my bogeyman. After all, I’d just witnessed him attacking my girlfriend. Maybe Marion became my bogeywoman as soon as I stood between her body and the open window, making her attacks on me some sort of self-fulfilling prophecy. Her terrifying antics had come from the darkest recesses of my own twisted imagination. This was all feasible, credible. I just didn’t believe it.
I returned to my side of the table, slumping in the seat. Lilian cocked her head and studied me, as if sitting at an easel.
‘You seem, I don’t know … annoyed?’
‘I’m fine,’ I lied, ‘I’m just coming to terms with the fact that I’m seemingly incapable of distinguishing dreams from reality.’
‘I sense that what I’ve said has upset you?’
‘I mean, with respect, Lilian, sleep paralysis doesn’t explain how I floated into Eve’s room and saw her getting attacked that time, does it? Or why Marion only came to me after I’d attended the scene of her murder?’
‘No, it doesn’t,’ she said softly. ‘I think I’ve found some of the answers. There are so many things that don’t make sense. You say you saw the time on the clock radio when Meehan attacked Eve. It is beyond dispute in the science of sleep that you can’t read numbers or letters in your dreams. I’d like to drill down into all these elements in your case.’
‘How can they even know that?’ I laughed, shuffling awkwardly, ignoring her determined eyes.
‘The first time we met,
Doner
, you said you wanted to know what was happening to you, and find a way to manage it.’
I nodded.
‘I think I can help you manage it. But only if you let me help you. Look
Doner
, I’m making progress here. But I need you fully on board. This is it, we either go all out or we call it a day.’
I recognised the cons right away:
1: Time.
2: Opening up and all that.
I considered the pros.
Lilian was the only person who knew my entire story, albeit in a condensed format. If there was a clinical explanation for my lurid ‘slasher movie’ episodes – the cop in me felt convinced that there
had
to be a clinical explanation – then she was the only person equipped to find it. I didn’t believe she could cure me, but I liked the idea of getting a decent night’s sleep every once in a while, if only so I could live a normal life.
But there was a sweeter incentive for me to keep going with this; vindication. She’d scoffed at my theory that Marion Ryan’s spirit wanted to help me nail her killer. Now I’d been brought onto the squad investigating her murder, one thing felt certain: I’d go back to 21 Sangora Road.
I’d attended the crime scene on two previous occasions. Both times Marion’s ghost/spirit had launched deranged assaults upon me. What if it happened again? How would Lilian explain away a third encounter? ‘Highly improbable’, indeed.
I don’t believe in ghosts, spirits, the afterlife or any of that stuff. But what Lilian had singularly refused to appreciate was how
real
these encounters had been.
‘You’re on,’ I said.
Clapham Police Station, South London
Thursday, August 8, 1991; 11:45
Although deserted, the incident room hummed with subdued intent. Barely larger than an average sitting room, it was crammed with phones and fat computer terminals. Stained coffee cups jockeyed for space with full ashtrays and used sandwich wrappers.
And to think they call us pigs.
Whiteboards lined the walls, listing the names of investigating officers and the computer codes of what leads they were chasing up. Nearby, a large picture map of London was dotted with yellow Post-its.
There was no sign of anyone to set me up, so I headed to the canteen. The overwhelming stench of fried pig had the curious effect of making me both hungry and queasy. I settled for a mug of Nescafé Rough Blend coffee and a can of cola, hoping the combined hit would crank me into first.
I returned to the incident room and took a good look at that note-spattered map of London.
I heard a noise and turned to see a chubby man in his forties feeding disks into one of the fat computers.
‘Hi,’ I said walking over, ‘I’m Donal Lynch, Acting DC.’
He nodded glumly without looking up.
After about ten minutes, he said: ‘I trust you’ve done this before?’
‘What, use a computer?’
‘No, fly a 747,’ he spat, now glaring up at me.
Was this some sort of test?
‘I haven’t used a computer since school,’ I said flatly.
‘Well it’s not my job to teach you,’ he said, getting to his feet and flouncing off.
I typed tentatively. Soon I found myself chewing through megabytes of Space Invader green text. Every investigative ‘action’ had been logged, numbered and described. Separate folders contained statements and reports. I knew exactly where I wanted to start.
During her nocturnal burglaries of my mind, Marion had repeatedly slammed doors. Her message, if I believed in her, had been clear: a door somewhere holds vital evidence to the identity of her killer. Could be a house door, could be a car door – but a door was where I’d find the smoking gun clue.
I clicked open the forensics folder, then the fingerprints file and sought out anything connected to doors at 21 Sangora Road.
I knew from my training that fingerprints are a lottery. A good print on the right surface can last for years. In one celebrated case, forensics dated a single print back forty years. Somewhat perversely, dating fresh prints is more difficult. There are so many factors to take into consideration: the surface the print is left on, whether it has been made with sweat or other substances, the air temperature.
The report said they found fresh fingerprints belonging to Marion’s husband Peter Ryan and his colleague Karen Foster on the front door and on the connecting door into the flat. All they could say with certainty was that these prints were less than twelve hours old. In other words, the impressions had been made sometime between ten a.m. and ten p.m. on the day of Marion’s murder.
They’d found lots of other prints left within the same time frame: sixteen sets on the front door and seven on the internal door to the flat. This seemed a surprisingly large number to me. I thought about the front door to our flat: there’d be no more than three or four different fingerprints planted there on any given day. The front door to the entire block would be plastered with them: ours was one of forty-eight flats. Marion and Peter’s flat was one of just two behind that front door. Yet they’d found sixteen sets of day-old prints on the communal front door. I made a note to investigate the frantic comings-and-goings at number 21 on the day of Marion’s murder.
I then read that they’d cross-referenced all of these prints with police records: none of them matched a known offender.
That was that. The killer’s prints could be on both doors, we just didn’t know who they belonged to. Or Marion’s husband Peter was the killer. Maybe that’s what Marion had been telling me during her ghostly visitations: look no further than him. But unless a witness saw Peter at 21 Sangora Road at around six p.m. on the day of the murder, his prints on the doors were evidentially useless.
I felt flat and a little foolish. Naïvely, I thought Marion had been leading me directly to her killer. But I refused to give up on the idea that a door somehow held the key. I just needed to work out which door, and how.
An overview report in the forensic folder directed me to a filing cabinet containing the scene of crime photos.
These included a close-up of Marion’s torn, dangling fingernail. I couldn’t understand why this single image flooded my body with such leaden sadness. I thought of Marion as a baby; how her mum and dad would have marvelled at this hand and treasured it. And as she grew up, they would have grasped it tightly to cross the road. Her dad held this hand when he gave her away to Peter, probably thinking he’d done his job, that she was safe now.
I got back to the computer to track down the pathology report. I felt under real pressure to find something –
anything
– that pointed to Peter Ryan. Shep had given me this golden opportunity: I didn’t want to let him down.
Bruising showed that Marion had received a karate-style chop between her upper lip and nose which may have momentarily stunned her. The forty-nine stab wounds were delivered in rapid succession; seven to her chest, nine to her throat, the rest to her lower stomach, back and bottom. One wound pierced her right hand as she tried to ward off the blows. Some were delivered with great force – suggesting a male attacker – but others were mere pinpricks. Could it have been a two-hander? Peter and his secret lover? What about Karen, the colleague who’d been with Peter when he found the body?
The two ‘significant wounds’ were one to her throat which slashed her windpipe and one to the left side of her back which pierced her lung. According to the pathologist, the force of these blows suggested they had been delivered by a man. She died through a combination of loss of blood and asphyxiation as it flowed into her lungs.
The pathologist estimated that the attack would have lasted between two and three minutes. The murder weapon appeared to be a five-inch blade. There had been no sexual assault or wounds to her genitalia. I felt these last facts warranted attention. Presumably, the Lone Wolf Killer had to be some sort of sexual deviant. Didn’t the lack of sexual assault or genital injury point more towards a domestic? The pathologist didn’t say so.
He put her time of death at six p.m., with an hour window each side. A handwritten note said: ‘CCTV provides more precise timing.’ The pathologist noted that he’d never come across a domestic murder victim with more than nine stab wounds. One nil to the Lone Wolf Killer theory.
I took the pathologist’s cue and tracked down the CCTV tapes. I hunted and found a VHS player in a tiny room, closed the blinds and watched with horrible fascination as Marion Ryan strode purposefully to her death.
She left her place of work – Reuters news agency on Fleet Street, where she’d been employed as a copy taker – at 17.06 p.m.
‘God, what are you wearing, love?’ I couldn’t help myself saying. In her big flowery dress, thick tights and heavy shoes, she could have been heading to the Ballroom of Romance.
She turned left onto Waterloo Bridge. The next camera captured her on the bridge, from above, the murky old Thames flowing lazily beneath. The song ‘Waterloo Sunset’ drifted into my mind. I banished it out of respect.
She walked efficiently, without fear – never once checking behind her. This wasn’t a woman worried about her wellbeing. No one appeared to be tracking her. Time-lapsed stills recorded her ghost-like progress across the ants’ nest concourse of Waterloo station. Again, she didn’t check behind her and had no obvious pursuer.
She must have caught an overground train because the next tape came from Clapham Junction train station. The time read 17.32 as she turned right at the main exit, setting off up St John’s Hill. The fuzzy frames revealed no potential stalker/killer. She looked oblivious to what lay ahead. She crossed at the traffic lights, just yards from the entry to Strathblaine Road, turned left – and that was the last frame we had of her.
The empty screen flickered and shuddered, as if aware somehow of the grave magnitude of what happened next. I thwarted all emotions by fixing upon cold, hard facts and ordering them in my mind:
Whoever murdered Marion had waited for her on Sangora Road. The question is, was it someone she knew or an opportunist maniac? At that time of day – rush hour – someone must have seen something.
Back at the computer, I clicked open the door-to-door enquiries file. The team had asked neighbours on Sangora Road if they’d seen anything suspicious on the afternoon/evening of Marion’s murder. What a stupid question, I thought. I mean, what’s suspicious? You might as well ask if they’d seen any maniacs running about brandishing blood-soaked, five-inch knives. Surely they should just ask people what they saw that day. It’s up to us to decide if any of it points to a suspect. I made a note of this. It was something to toss Shep’s way if I failed to come up with anything better.
Unsurprisingly, the officers’ limited questionnaire yielded nothing. I was running out of time, and decided that the most likely place to find anything incriminating against Peter would be in his supposedly rock-solid alibi.
He and Karen had made brief statements on the night of Marion’s murder, then detailed statements two days later. The devil is always in the detail, so I focused on the latter.
I laid their longer statements out side-by-side. By switching between the two, I could check more easily if and when their stories didn’t tally.
Peter described how he first met Marion at the Archway Tavern when she was seventeen: he was twenty-three. No doubt she was swept off her feet by this square-jawed Irishman with worldly charm, roguish self-confidence and big plans to make money and move back home. They married last year in her parents’ home town in Kilkenny.
Peter worked as an assistant purchasing manager and gardener at the Pines, a private home for the elderly in Lambeth, South London. Karen Foster was also employed at the home as a trainee nurse and resided on-site in staff accommodation. I found this a little odd. She’d told me herself that her family live in Lee, just a few miles down the road. I knew from Aidan, my flatmate, how little trainee nurses earn: why didn’t she save money by staying at home? Then I thought about the anti-social shifts they have to work and moved on.
On the morning of the murder, Peter took the overground train from Clapham Junction to Waterloo with Marion, which was their usual routine. He arrived at the Pines just before nine a.m. He always put the keys to the flat in his briefcase, which he kept next to his desk in the shed/office in the grounds of the Pines: they were too big to carry about in his trousers. He left work just once during the day.
At about 15.45 p.m., he took a ten-minute walk to the street known as The Cut where, each fortnight, he bought fifty pounds’ worth of feed, tank cleaner and water treatment granules for the home’s fish tanks.
He went on to explain that every second Monday evening, he did a couple of hours’ overtime for extra money, cleaning and replenishing the home’s fish tanks. He was helped by his colleague and friend, Karen Foster.
I turned over ‘colleague and friend’ in my mind. It struck me as oddly formal, a little defensive.
On the evening of Marion’s murder – Monday, July 1st – he met Karen as usual at around six p.m., just outside the main ward at the home. They finished just before eight p.m. when Karen gave him a lift to Sangora Road. He didn’t own a car and Karen often dropped him home when they’d worked late.
An appendix showed that Peter’s movements during the day had been verified by the manager of Pet Fish, London SE1 and a work colleague at the home. The man from Pet Fish recalled the day particularly well because Peter had forgotten his chequebook. The manager accepted a signed IOU which he was able to produce later. This sounded to me like an alibi being created before the crime had even been committed. A colleague at the home claimed he chatted to Peter as he came back in with the fish supplies, at about 16.45 p.m. This left a window of one hour unaccounted for in Peter’s afternoon. I felt sure Shep would have picked up on this already, but made a note of it anyway. At least it showed that I was thinking the way he’d instructed me to.
I flicked over to Karen’s statement.
I finished work at about 17.15 p.m. when my younger sister Laura called to say she was arriving at the home. We’d arranged to watch a soap on TV with Bethan in her room at 17.30. Bethan Trott is a colleague at the clinic and we watch this show together most days because I don’t have a TV in my room. She lives in the room four doors down from mine in the staff halls of residence. I met Laura at reception. As we came upstairs, we saw Bethan in the communal kitchen and went with her to her room. We had a cup of tea and watched TV until six when the show ended. I went to the main ward and met Peter. Every second Monday we clean and re-stock the fish tanks in the wards. He pays me ten pounds in cash. It’s extra money and I’ve always liked fish.
I thought it odd that Peter hadn’t mentioned paying her. Karen went on to say she had an upset stomach and, before leaving the home, went to the toilet.
The journey to Sangora Road took fifteen minutes at the most. I couldn’t park on Sangora Road because it was already full. I had to park on the side road. I don’t know what it is called.
She and Peter walked to the flat. Because of her upset stomach, she wanted to use the toilet again before returning to the Pines. Classy girl, I thought. She also intended having a quick chat with Marion, who was a friend. On top of that, Peter wanted her to take two flower pots from his flat to the home. They were too heavy for him to take on the train. When Peter put his key in the communal front door, he found that the mortise lock was not on. This was so unusual that he remarked upon it – Marion always kept it double-locked. He then unlocked the door to the flat and walked upstairs.