They had been engaged? Rodney and Vanessa had been engaged? Sarah’s head was spinning as she found her coat and walked down the stairs in a daze. Who had ended it, and why? Well, it must have been Vanessa of course - she had married Richard within months, it seemed. Had the lovely blonde been engaged to Rodney, met his brother, and then realized she’d made a mistake? Or had they had a quarrel, or . . . She continued blindly down the stairs, her head teeming with a hundred variations on a theme. Did Rodney still have some feeling for her? She stopped dead in the hall, the rise and fall of conversation from the drawing room sounding like a swarm of bees. Vanessa was beautiful, cultured, elegant . . . and she was part of his world.
She stared at the closed door and then reached for the curving brass handle. The day wasn’t turning out quite as she had expected, all things considered.
The gardens surrounding the house were extensive, and laid out in a formal pattern of flowerbeds and rectangles of lawn, interspersed with neat circles of bushes and strategically placed young trees. The air was indeed mild, unlike the day before, and it was more reminiscent of an early spring day than late December as Rodney and Sarah strolled down to the little rose arbour at the perimeter of the grounds.
Sarah was finding conversation difficult - her newly acknowledged feelings made her tongue-tied and uncomfortable - and it was after Rodney had enquired as to the security procedures at the house that she blurted out the events of the night before. Rodney’s response had shattered the calm of the December day, and sent a host of twittering sparrows zooming into the sky, as he’d bellowed, ‘
He did what?
’
She hadn’t expected such a dramatic reaction, but as the full story had come out, she became aware he was genuinely very upset.
‘
And you just went to bed?
’ He was staring at her as though she had come from another planet. ‘You didn’t phone anyone? Maggie, Lady Harris, the police - me?’
‘Well, nothing actually happened.’
‘Nothing actually happened.’ He repeated her words slowly. ‘I don’t believe you just said that. At the very least you should have reported the incident to someone in authority at the local police station. What if he had come back?’
‘He didn’t.’
Rodney continued staring at her a moment longer before he said, ‘Sarah—’ And then stopped abruptly, taking a deep breath.
‘It’s all right, really.’
‘It’s far from all right.’ He shook his head slowly. ‘First Peggy and now this. The man wants locking away. Now, there is no way you are staying there alone tonight, and Lady Harris needs to be informed without delay. Are you going to do that, or do you want me to?’
They had reached the little rose arbour, which had been cut into a semi-circle in the lawn the path was bordering, and as they sat by unspoken mutual consent on the small slatted wooden seat enclosed on three sides by trellis, Sarah found she was staring at him. She wasn’t quite sure if she should be feeling so thrilled at his concern, and to hide her emotion she lowered her head as she said, ‘I had intended to call Fenwick over the next day or two.’
‘Tonight.’
‘All right, tonight.’
‘And we’d better see about sorting out some accommodation for you—’
‘There’s no need for that,’ she said quickly. ‘I’d feel awkward about leaving the house unattended at night, but I could always ask Peggy to come and stay for a couple of days. I know she wouldn’t mind.’
‘She hasn’t gone home for Christmas?’
‘You don’t know what her home’s like! No, she’s with the Coles, and as she knows all there is to know about Sir Geoffrey I won’t be betraying any confidences if I explain things to her. I can just say to the Coles that I’m nervous about being alone until Eileen is back.’
‘Right, we’ll do that then. We’ll leave here early and go there on our way back to Emery Place.’
Silence reigned for a few minutes, and it was clear to Sarah that Rodney wanted to say something and didn’t know quite how to put it, so when he leant forward, his elbows on his knees and his hands loosely clasped, she wondered what she was going to hear.
‘Sarah, you’re a young woman, a very young woman, just starting out on life, and I don’t want you to think all men are like Sir Geoffrey or Rebecca’s husband,’ Rodney said slowly. ‘There are good men, decent men, out there, and in the fulness of time you will meet one who is right for you. I’ve known couples who have something which takes them all through the trials of life together, the Coles are one such pair, and my parents were another.’
She stared at the bowed profile without speaking, her vantage point making her aware of the way his hair grew into little curls at the base of his head, and the broad line of his shoulders, and she really didn’t know if she wanted to kiss him or hit him. He was talking as if she was five years old and he was a hundred, for goodness’ sake!
‘You had a tough time of it at Hatfield, and that’s putting it mildly, and one of the consequences of such segregation of the sexes at an early age is that you didn’t come into contact with many members of the opposite sex during your formative years. Certainly you didn’t experience a father’s influence.’
If he was going to suggest he could be a father to her she definitely
would
hit him.
‘Look, what I’m trying to say is this.’ He straightened, leaning back against the slatted wood and turning to look at her. ‘You must not let the men I’ve mentioned spoil things for you, do you understand me? It would be easy to assume the whole male race is a mixture of philanderers and bullies and worse, but you mustn’t disregard the millions who devote themselves to their wives and families, and who live very contented and happy lives with just one woman.’
‘I know.’ She did, she did.
‘Good.’ He smiled. ‘There is a young man out there for you, Sarah, that you’ve yet to meet, but you’ll know him when you see him and he’ll know you.’
Right, enough was enough. She stood up abruptly, and her voice was tight when she said, ‘Perhaps we ought to get back now? The others will be wondering where we’ve got to.’
He’d upset her, talking so familiarly. She must look on him as a member of another generation, it wasn’t like a friend of her own age chatting to her. Damn it, he’d embarrassed her, made her feel uncomfortable with him, he should have left well alone.
Rodney remained sitting for a moment more before rising slowly, suddenly feeling every one of his thirty-eight years as her youthfulness swamped him. Well, that was his answer to the question whether she might ever see him as something more than a friend. He checked his thinking immediately. He hadn’t wondered that, had he?
Had he?
Perhaps he had at that. Damn it all, he was a fool. He’d been a fool where Vanessa was concerned, and it seemed he wasn’t getting any brighter with age.
‘What’s the matter?’
They were walking back to the house, and he hadn’t been aware her eyes were on him until she spoke.
‘Nothing, nothing.’ He forced a smile. ‘Well, on to the charades I suppose. That was one good thing about the war, they didn’t expect you to play charades in the camp.’ It was the first time he had been able to talk naturally about the war that he could remember, and it surprised him.
‘No, I don’t suppose they did,’ she said softly. ‘We heard things, awful things, back in England. It must have been hard for you, and I suppose all this, the social side of life, must seem very unimportant now.’
‘Unimportant?’ He considered the word as he breathed in the sweet scent of her that he had noticed before, a mixture of magnolia and musk, he thought. Vanessa had always used Chanel No. 5 from the day he had met her, and only now did he acknowledge that he had never liked the perfume on her, although his mother had worn it and it had smelt quite different. ‘No, not unimportant,’ he said quietly. ‘Surreal at times, maybe, but it’s comforting in a way to know that life goes on even when we think the world’s coming to an end. And I did think the world was coming to an end at times, even when I was back home in England. But the rain continues to fall, the sun shines, babies are born . . . and Vanessa plays charades,’ he added with a wry smile.
Vanessa. Yes. Quite.
She spoke quickly now to hide the sudden jealousy which she wasn’t proud of but couldn’t do a thing about. ‘Talking of babies, we had a new arrival in the children’s ward yesterday, on Christmas Eve of all days, bless him. He’s only six months old and he’d managed to fall out of his cot. His poor mother was frantic.’
‘Oh yes, how’s that work going? I meant to ask you about it earlier.’ And so they walked back into the house chatting away, as though the undercurrents which were beginning to bubble beneath the surface hadn’t touched either of them.
Rodney and Sarah left the party early, much to Vanessa’s chagrin, and drove straight to the Coles’ house, where Peggy seemed to understand the situation at once, despite the fact that Sarah could only explain fully to her once the young girl was seated with them in the car on the way back to Emery Place. However, mainly due to the fact that Meg pressed them to have a mince pie and a cup of tea, and it had seemed churlish to refuse the little woman, it had turned ten before Sarah opened the front door of 19 Emery Place, and first Peggy, then Rodney, followed her into the hall just as the telephone began to ring.
She picked it up quickly, fully expecting it to be Lady Margaret, or even her employer if she was feeling better, but after stating the number there was no response, and she repeated it, adding, ‘How may I help you?’
‘How may you help me?’ A pause, and then, ‘You think a vicious unbalanced little slut like you could help
me
?’
She dropped the receiver as though it had bitten her, and as it clattered on to the little table, Rodney sprang forward saying, ‘Leave it, leave it, I’ll deal with it.’ He picked up the instrument quickly, barking into the receiver as he said, ‘Who is that? Who’s there?’ And then, ‘Answer me, damn it.’
‘Are you all right, miss? Sit down.’
She didn’t answer Peggy, leaning against the wall with her eyes on Rodney as he slowly replaced the receiver. ‘He’s gone. It
was
him, wasn’t it?’
Sarah nodded, her stomach churning, before sheer rage replaced the sick shock of the call. ‘How dare he, how
dare
he do that?’ she said to the other two. ‘He’s got no right to call me names.’
‘Oh, miss.’ Peggy’s indignant voice lightened the atmosphere somewhat when she said, ‘An’ you’re so good an’ all. He’s a swine, that’s what Michael called him when I told him about - well, you know. An’ he was right, wasn’t he, Dr Mallard? He’s nothin’ but a swine, an’ to call the miss names . . .’
Rodney nodded at the young girl as he said, ‘Michael was spot on, Peggy. Look, why don’t you go and make Sarah and yourself a bit of supper while we phone Lady Harris, and perhaps you’d bring her a cup of hot sweet tea as soon as you can?’
‘Yes, I’ll do that.’ Peggy shot a look of concern at Sarah’s white face. ‘An’ I’ll put somethin’ in it.’
‘No, no thanks, Peggy,’ Sarah said with a weak smile. ‘The tea would be lovely but I drank half the brandy bottle last night after Sir Geoffrey’s visit. The man will turn me into an alcoholic if I’m not careful. Just plenty of sugar.’
‘All right, miss.’
Sarah asked for Lady Margaret when she got through to Fenwick. She didn’t feel up to talking to Lady Harris about her son but Lady Margaret had become more of a friend than anything else the last few weeks, and the phone call wasn’t as difficult as she had expected it to be. It seemed nothing surprised Lady Margaret with regard to her husband. However, the older woman was angry and upset, and she insisted on returning to Emery Place within the next day or two, although Sarah assured her repeatedly it wasn’t necessary, and promised Sarah she would put Lady Harris fully in the picture the next day. Her mother-in-law had ways, Lady Margaret said meaningfully, of bringing Sir Geoffrey to heel - the handsome allowance Sir Geoffrey was designated sprang to Sarah’s mind - and the matter would be addressed immediately. Sarah needn’t worry about it any more.
It was as Rodney was leaving that he reached inside his jacket and surprised her by bringing out a small gold-wrapped parcel, handing it to her with a smile as he said, ‘I was going to give this to you earlier, but there didn’t seem a right moment.’
‘Oh, thank you.’ She felt awful. She hadn’t got him anything but she hadn’t expected to see him over Christmas, and by the time she had known she would, she’d been committed to working at the hospital for most of Christmas Eve.