Almost Lovers (31 page)

“The Queen gave you authority to sentence
royalty,” I whispered back, my eyes darting to the Queen who stood
tall and proud not far away and perfectly able to hear my every
word, “Authority enough to sentence me…or even the Queen
herself,”

Prussia’s eyes went wide with disbelief. As
she looked to the Queen I turned to the court and said my piece as
the ceremony demanded.

“God save Queen Victoria,” I said and
stepped back.

“God save Queen VICTORIA. Long live Queen
VICTORIA. May the Queen live for ever,” echoed the court
loudly.

I stepped back to my place behind and off
center from the podium and waited for the part I had been
anticipating for so long. The only part that remained – Prussia’s
dowry demands in response to my proposal. I hoped it would be
something I could truly enjoy lavishing on her. I had already
gotten her a car. If she wanted the Queen’s castle I had no doubt
the Queen would grant it to us. I think the crazy old Queen had
planned this all from the beginning, though beyond elaborate even
for her.

Prussia cleared her throat as quiet as a
mouse and looked down at the ceremonial speech she had been
instructed to read ahead of the dowry demands. The court didn’t
seem to mind though normally this speech is something Ladies
brought up in the court recited regularly in rehearsed excitement.
Prussia looked up at the court and paused.

“You all may not know but my boyfriend, whom
I hoped to marry, was murdered right in front of my eyes,” said
Prussia, murmurs went up through the court at her unconventional
disregard for ceremony “Now I am to marry Sebastian and to demand a
dowry. If I’m to demand something as a dowry then I demand
Sebastian find and bring me Robert’s murderer so I can kill him
with my own hands,”

Prussia stepped back and the murmuring
turned a roaring loud chatter as everyone turned to one another and
commented on the request. I knew what this meant as Prussia stepped
back from the podium right next to me. I looked to the Queen to see
if this would be allowed and the Queen had the biggest smile on her
face I had ever seen in my life. The Queen knew exactly who had
killed Robert, but did the Queen tell Prussia? Did Prussia know
what she just asked of me, truly? Prussia couldn’t know because she
had said ‘him’ and the Queen and I both knew that Robert had been
killed by a ‘her’, Lydia.

I looked out at the sea of faces chattering
on about the request. This had been the most unorthodox request
ever asked as long as I had been attending court. When our eyes
finally met I knew that the world could shift under my very feet at
any moment. Lydia looked at me from her place in the crowd and our
eyes locked. She waited, her face pleading. Did I love Prussia
enough to do this? Could I accept the terms of the dowry and kill
the only woman I had ever loved in my life on this earth?

Lydia kept her eyes locked with mine as I
approached the podium to give my response and the room fell
completely silent and still. The stillness ran stiff with electric
excitement. The court loved this type of thing – death and
love.

I ripped my eyes away from Lydia’s as hers
began to fill with what I could clearly see were tears, even from
so far away. I looked down at the carefully penned speech that
Prussia had left on the podium, no attempt to even recite it. I
unrolled it and saw that her speech asked ‘for her heart back’
which would have been almost impossible to measure and given her an
easy way to simply call off the engagement completely. I looked
back to Prussia. She looked away just as I could see her and I knew
she had meant to leave the speech there. Perhaps there could be
hope for us after all. And I had made a promise to her.

I didn’t know what winning her heart back
would cost me. It would cost Lydia her life. I would have to drag
Lydia to Prussia’s feet and watch as Prussia gave her the eternal
death in order to secure our love.

The room waited for my answer and I didn’t
know if I could give it. I looked back out into the court and could
see face after face waiting with anticipation at what my answer
would be.

“I accept your dowry request,” I said,
looking for Lydia out in the crowd still but hearing only a door
slam, “and am proud to soon call you my wife,”

The entire room erupted in cheers and the
court moved with barely contained excitement. I couldn’t smile. I
had so much going on in my mind that I could barely return to my
place next to Prussia. I took her hand lightly and held our clasped
hands over head to show our symbolic union. The court screamed.
They didn’t love us – they loved what would follow. Love in
exchange for death.

I had to accept it. If I wanted to keep her
safe I had not choice but to accept it. I had a year to make it
happen or fail. I had a year to come to grips with dragging Lydia
kicking and screaming or throwing Prussia to the wolves.

I looked at Prussia and when our eyes met I
felt the electricity in the room condense into our stare. I hadn’t
seen her with this look on her face before. It looked like
happiness but with a touch of something else, a lust for
vengeance.

“Do you know what you’ve asked of me?” I
asked, as quietly as I could in the room roaring with shouts of
excitement.

“Do you know what I’ve been through?”
Prussia asked me, moving closer.

Prussia looked at me with determination, her
face inches from me. She had always been soft, kind and a bit naive
at times. Something in her look said she had lost something of
that. What had happened to her had changed her. I didn’t expect she
wouldn’t be changed from what had happened to her. I just wanted to
preserve who she had been as a person. I could see now that I had
been too late. I felt guilty for what it had all cost her. I blamed
myself.

Prussia’s lips curled into an angry smile. I
leaned forward and did the only thing I could think of. I kissed
her. I tried to kiss away her hurt and her pain. She didn’t move an
inch and barely softened beneath my kiss. I pulled my lips from
hers and looked deeply into her fire-fueled eyes.

“I never intended any of this,” I said.

“Neither did I,” Prussia said, her face set
in stone-cold determination, that spark of anger and resentment
flickering, “but here we are…” and Prussia left me at the podium
with a court cheering for the eternal death... of Lydia.

THE END

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