Allegiance (19 page)

He shook his head fiercely. His eyes flickered to my face, a hint of shame in them. “I was right there and she still got to you. I’m just so angry.”

“It’s not your fault.” I hesitantly reached forward, my own fingertips running along his index finger. He didn’t react at first. I was afraid I had overstepped this new unspoken boundary. But then his long fingers laced between mine. My pulse quickened as those intoxicating jade jewels seized me, demolishing me with their intensity, lifting me up, up into the clouds, into heaven, into oblivion …

“What was your nightmare about?”

And I was tumbling downwards, anxiety slamming me against the hard, cold, uncaring ground of reality. My voice caught as I whispered one name, a name that left a bitter taste on my tongue. “Veronique.” It was the truth and yet a blatant lie. Another lie …

Caden slid his arm around to my opposite hip and pulled me close to him, welcoming my forehead against the ridges of his chest. He rested his cheek affectionately against the top of my head. “I’m sure she’s fine. There’s no reason they’re doing anything to hurt her. She’s too valuable,” Caden promised in a low whisper, his hand running through the length of my hair, stroking it gently.

You’re so wrong, Caden
. Tears seared my eyes. I swallowed a sob. “I hope not.”
Another lie to Caden
. Two major lies in one night and I had sworn I could never tell him one.

I want to forget everything. Make me forget everything, for just a little while
. My hand expanded, fingers stretched out across his chest, raking his muscles, skimming down along the ripples, wandering over his chest, his biceps, his stomach, his belt …

“I should go,” Caden whispered, grabbing my hand, his body growing rigid. A snake of tension constricted inside me. Reluctantly, I pulled away, rubbing residual tears away with the back of my hand. He moved to stand up.

“Wait!” My hand flew to his leg, grasping his outer thigh. I tempered my voice, asking more tentatively, “Can’t you stay a little while longer? Please?”

“Bishop’s all alone.” As if that explained everything, he was on his feet.

I swallowed my fear, forcing the next question out. “Is that why? Does it have anything to do with … before?”
With Julian?

He towered over me like an angel, his tall, muscular body more appealing to me than ever before. I didn’t know why. Maybe because I was losing him … “Yeah. A little bit,” he admitted. The snake squeezed tighter, threatening to crush my vital organs, to end me. A single tear escaped, rolling down my cheek. I smeared it away with the back of my hand, not wanting him to see me cry.

Too late. The muscles in his neck tensed as he swallowed. He looked away, focused on the window. “It’s not right or fair that it bothers me, but it does. I can’t help feeling like you’ve betrayed me, even though I have no right. I’ll get over it but … it will take some time.”

“How long?” I asked. Inside, I was dissolving in misery.

“Evangeline.” His voice cracked, full of desperation. After a long pause, he shrugged. His voice turned hard and cold. “We have bigger issues to deal with right now.”

Bowing my head, I sank into the bed, clenching until my nails dug into my palms. I recognized practical Caden, the guy who’d kept me at arm’s length back on Ratheus. I thought I’d chased him away for good, but he was back again. He was assembling his own wall. A brick wall, not as agonizing as my barbed wire fence of lies, but still substantial. I wanted to scream at it, to tear it down, throw the pieces away, smash them, burn them. Instead, I nodded.

“Everything will be fine with us. I just need some time.” Time. Something we didn’t have. Leaning down, his cool lips first grazed my forehead and then planted a lingering kiss on it. “Get some sleep. I’ll see you in the morning.” With that, he vanished into the night, leaving me alone with my crumbling sanity.

When Max ventured in, the tears were still falling.

***

I woke up empty, drained. Luckily, I hadn’t endured another round of Veronique’s physical torture. Now, it was only my own mental torment that loitered. I wondered which was worse. Max was gone again. Likely out hunting. He had spent hours silently mopping up my tears with his snout. As much as I appreciated him, I appreciated the time alone.

Heaving myself out of bed, I showered and dressed at a sluggish pace, preparing myself for another day of Tribal magic surprises, of watching a good friend imprisoned and suffering, perhaps another injury, but most of all, another round of gut-wrenching distance between Caden and me.

Springy blond curls and a brilliant smile ambushed me the second I stepped out into the silent, empty hallway. “Ah!” I yelled, stumbling, my head banging against the doorframe.

“Come on!” Amelie chirped, oblivious to my shock. She grabbed hold of my good arm.

I let her drag me, my heart hammering against my rib cage. “Where?”

She shrugged vaguely. “Doesn’t matter. We’re spending the day together, remember? First, you probably need to eat.”

We found the two French cooks in the kitchen, this time with rolling pins in their hand and a round, flat pastry dough stretched out on the marble countertop. Smiling in unison, they dove back into their work.

“What do you feel like?” Amelie asked, already neck-deep into the open fridge. Before I could tell her I’d rather eat glass than food, a plate of fresh fruit and pastries materialized in front of me. Amelie’s long silver-painted fingernail tapped against the countertop. “Eat up!”

“You sound like Sofie,” I grumbled. I wasn’t hungry. The thought of food made me want to vomit, my insides twisted into so many intricate knots even Houdini couldn’t unravel. But, I knew arguing with Amelie would take too much strength. She’d pin me down and force-feed me. So I relented, picking up a slice of melon. Its sweet juices had barely touched my lips when Sofie entered. It’s like they had Evangeline radar …

Minty eyes narrowed slightly, as they had the previous morning, when she was sensing me magically. It set off a volcano of panic inside me. The melon dropped from my grasp onto my plate.

“What? What is it now?” What had changed overnight? Was my touch finally lethal? No … Amelie had held my hand. She was still alive and perky. Which meant I wasn’t a full-on leper yet …

Sofie shook her head, reading my mind without being able to read my mind. “Nothing. How was the rest of your night?”

Lonely … I pushed my bitterness away and grumbled, “Fine,” as I slid the plate away. It may as well have been crawling with maggots, as unappetizing as it was.

My answer earned a heavy sigh of relief from her. “Good. I’m going to be busy for a while. Testing something out on Bishop.”

I jumped out of my seat. “Are you serious?” Finally, a spark of hope, a ray of something positive. “Have you figured out how to fix him?”

“I have an idea or two. Nothing I’m sure of yet…” Striding forward, she stopped before me to push a strand of hair from my face. “I’ll take care of everything. Don’t worry. I’ll fix it.”

I want to believe you Sofie, I do
. I just couldn’t help but feel fate was spiraling out of control. Swallowing a painful lump of despair, I nodded and changed the subject. “Any news from Lilly?”

The responding scowl gave me my answer. “I expect we will hear something soon.” Sofie looked down to my injured arm, her deepening scowl creating unpleasant clefts in her forehead. “You can keep Evangeline occupied, right, Amelie?”

Amelie hopped off her stool, saluting in a military fashion. “I’m on it! I’ve got Operation Entertain Evie covered!”

Despite everything, that earned a genuine smile. Oh, how I missed Amelie’s levity!

Cool fingers traced my chin. “I haven’t seen that beautiful smile in so long,” Sofie whispered. I turned to see sadness flash across her face. Then it was gone, replaced by a mask of composure as she leveled Amelie with a sobering stare. “Help me keep it there, will you, Amelie?” With that, Sofie vanished.

“So …” Amelie leaned on her elbows, cradling her chin. “What do you wanna do?”

I shrugged with disinterest, squashing a blueberry between my fingers. “What’s there to do?” Wander around the halls of this giant chateau and pretend that everything was fine? That Veronique wasn’t being tortured to death, that Caden and I weren’t one second from over, that Amelie wouldn’t be crushed and Julian dead once they discovered his secret? That I wasn’t slowly turning into a Tribe demon? That the world wasn’t going to end …

Hands clapped sharply, catching the tip of my nose. “Earth to Evie! What is going on in that pretty little head of yours?”

“I’m … wallowing,” I admitted. Heat crept up my neck. I wasn’t a wallower. That wasn’t me. From my mother’s death, to my solitary teenaged years, to learning of the curse, I had never spent more than a minute dwelling on the negatives. Now, I was bathing in L’Eau de Wallow.

“Bad idea, Evangeline. You need a good distraction.” Her hand rested on my shoulder. “So let’s find one, okay?”

“Okay … What do you have in mind?”

“I’m not sure … I usually hunt bears and jump off cliffs when I need a distraction.”

I snorted as my gaze roamed the four walls of the kitchen, imagining the long halls outside, the stairs, the rooms … Nothing there was distracting enough. Well, except Caden. But then that’d just bring me back to my inevitable worry. I needed to get away. Far away, just for a little while.

“Let’s get out of here,” I whispered, already anticipating Amelie’s negative answer.

An impish curve touched her lips. “We could,” she mouthed. She looked over to ensure the cooks weren’t listening.

My heart started pounding against my ribs. “Seriously? Do you think Sofie’ll be mad?”

Her mouth twisted. “If she found out … yeah, probably. But I’ve been out once or twice. Caden’s been out a couple of times … Viggo’s out twice a day. Nothing has happened! There are no signs of any Sentinels watching. We should go!” Bright white teeth glistened as she struggled to contain her excited smile. “We could do it, Evie! We could …” Her words trailed off as the eagerness deflated like a popped balloon, crushing my already weak spirit.

“Those wolves. They’d tell Sofie right away. We can’t get past their stupid mutt noses.”

I smiled. Finally, an advantage.

***

Rounding the corner into the foyer, I almost smacked into Viggo striding through the front door. He cringed and jumped backward a foot to avoid my hand grazing his leg. He was afraid of me and my Tribal magic. I smirked with satisfaction. I was a natural Viggo repellant. A silver lining.

“What are you two up to, so giggly and … annoying?”

“Girl stuff!” Amelie spat back haughtily, hooking her arm through mine.

With an exaggerated eye roll, Viggo sidestepped around us—giving me an extra wide berth—and continued on, not in the least bit interested in a couple of tittering young women. Not unless they were tittering over him. I released the lungs’ worth of air I didn’t realize I was holding. I may repel him but he still terrified me.

“Okay. Stay right here,” Amelie ordered, pointing to the tile where I stood, as if I were a dog who might wander away. She vanished, only to reappear ten seconds later with coats and boots for both of us. “Come on!”

I had one boot on and was tugging the second on when Amelie grabbed my arm and began dragging me out the door, my coat hanging off one arm. “Quick!” She pointed to a navy jeep sat parked outside. Opening the passenger door, she bowed. “After you, mademoiselle!”

I took a deep breath. This was crazy. We were crazy! Before I could chicken out, I hopped in. “Sofie’s going to kill me,” I muttered to myself. Amelie was in the driver’s side an instant.

“And you’re sure you want to do this?” she asked slowly.

I sighed. “Amelie? We’ve got both our hands in the cookie jar and now you’re the voice of reason?”

“Well, I don’t know … you’re always the good one.”

“Yeah, and where has that gotten me …” I peered over my shoulder at the chateau, where too many problems lay hidden within the walls. Turning back, gazing down on the city of Paris, I saw only freedom beyond the ten-foot stone wall. An escape, if only brief. I nodded firmly. “We need to get out or I’m going to go bat-shit crazy. Besides, you’re with me and we’re in Paris. No one knows we’re here … we’ll be fine,” I smiled, adding, “Just don’t forget … Sofie can’t fix me if I get broken.”

Amelie grimaced. She grabbed my hands, her voice suddenly urgent. “I won’t let anything happen to you. I’ve already lost one best friend. I won’t lose another. I promise. If I suspect anything, we’ll come right back. Swear!”

I held out my pinky finger. “Swear.” She giggled, hooking onto my pinky, and then followed it with a ferocious hug. Like a cloud lifted, she was back to Amelie, her pretty little face full of determination. She began pawing the visors, the side pockets, the console, the glove compartment.

“Where are the damn keys? There must be a set somewhere …” When it was obvious that we weren’t going to find a set of keys in here, she shrugged. “Rats! Oh, well.” Reaching down to the ignition, she yanked the cover off, exposing a mess of wires. She had them plucked apart, stripped, and crossed in seconds. The rumble of the engine filled my ears.

“Where the hell did you learn to hotwire a car?”