All Who Dream (Letting Go) (7 page)

 
He cleared his throat. “
Pippy
—uh,
Pippy
said there’s a problem?”

“What?
No…not that I know of.”
 
I felt for the pendant
at my neck and rubbed it gently between my fingers. He looked back again,
watching my hand with interest.

“She said
you aren’t comfortable getting more than three dresses…Is there a reason?”

He
studied my face as if all my thoughts were written on display for him.

“I don’t
need more than that.”

“Well,
she seems to think otherwise.”

He
crossed his arms as if anchoring his position. Several ladies walked by us,
throwing glances our way—
his way
in
particular.

 
“You probably shouldn’t be back here,” I
whispered.

 
“There are doors.
They’ll
live,” he mock-whispered back.

His eyes
challenged me to continue.

I
swallowed hard. “I can’t afford more than that.”

He
sighed. “There is nothing to afford. You’re not paying for them—I thought she
explained that to you.”

 
“I don’t feel right about the company paying
for my formal wear—it’s not their fault I didn’t pack the right attire. I just
need a short-term loan, and then I will repay it, three is what I can afford.”

He opened
his mouth twice before he spoke again, “So you’re saying you have a
moral issue
with the company expensing
your dresses without repayment?”

 
“Yes.”

He chuckled
once and shook his head, “Okay…well, there’s a first time for everything, I
suppose. Make your selections, Miss Flores. I’ll speak with
Pippy
.”

He turned
to leave and then stopped, turning back to me as his eyes roamed my figure
unabashed. My throat went dry.

“You
should get that one.”

I shut
myself inside the dressing room and bit my lip as a pink blush crept up my neck
and into my cheeks. His statement wasn’t quite a compliment, but I’d seen
something in his eyes just now…something that no longer could be concluded as
disdain.

Pippy
and I had narrowed the selection down to ten, and
from there I picked my favorites, and by favorites, I meant the least
expensive. As an associate came over to carry the precious cargo up to the
counter, my heart nearly beat out of my chest. I never spent this kind of my
money on myself.
Ever.

Pippy
looped her arm through mine. “Hey, let’s go grab some
lunch. It sounds like the guys are hungry.”

 
“Oh, okay. Don’t I need to get my bags?” I
asked, peeking around her to the counter where my selections lay.

 
“Uh, Walt is
gonna
swing by and pick them up so you don’t have to carry them into every store we
go in today.”

 
“Oh, alright.
That’s
nice of him.” I smiled, and so did she.

Cody got
his “New York hotdog” and was happy as could be. The rest of us preferred a
sandwich, so we found a sub shop and sat at an outside patio table. The weather
was warm, but not too warm. What a difference from the heat of Dallas. I
enjoyed the fresh air immensely. Jackson was leaning back in his seat,
scrolling through his emails and texts when I turned my head toward our social
coordinator.

 
“Tell me about your brother,
Pippy
?” I asked her.

 
“Oh—Peter. You will probably meet him soon, he
works for my, uh—Mr. Ross as well,” she said looking from Jackson to me and
smiling. “He works as a liaison for our different publishing houses.”

 
“Oh? So you spend a lot of time with him?” I
asked.

 
“Yeah.
He’s my best
friend.”

The way
she said it broke something loose inside my chest. Briggs and I were close like
that, although things had changed a bit since he’d gotten married. But I had
expected as much.

 
“I’m very close with my brother, too. That’s a
rarity.”

 
“It is, yes. I couldn’t imagine not having him
in my life. We are two peas in a pod—speaking of, he will just love Cody! He
may be twenty, but I swear he never grew up. I’m sure he’d love to show Cody
around and play some soccer with him at the park one day.”

 
“Really?
Your brother
plays soccer?” Cody asked, invested in the conversation for the first time.

 
“He sure does, and I hate it…so I’m sure he’d
love to play with you!”

“When can
I meet him?”

 
“I’ll find out. I’m sure he will be at one of
the dinners next week, or maybe he can come by at a signing and meet you then.”

Cody chomped
on a big bite of hot dog, “Cool.”

Pippy
giggled and I echoed. Jackson looked up from his
phone, his eyes regarding me curiously as a bolt of lightning charged through
my core.

Six weeks
with Jackson Ross would be my undoing.

Pulling
Cody into the backseat with me on the ride home, I made sure the front was wide-open
for a certain sexy bachelor. I could only handle so much Jackson in a day.

Jackson hadn’t
said much to me since our showdown in the dressing room, other than to ask if
he could take Cody for ice cream. The request had actually come at the perfect
time since
Pippy
had wandered inside a discount shoe
store.

Our lack
of conversation was fine by me. I wasn’t up for another battle of wits with
him. I needed to save my mental energy for dinner.
Pippy
said the gathering would be small—just the authors on tour and a few editors. I
was actually looking forward to the event.

After we
parked in front of the T. Ross Building, Walt assured me he’d have my purchases
brought up to the apartment. I started to argue, but his sweet smile melted my
heart.

“Well, thank
you,” I said.

Jackson
was on his phone, avoiding eye contact when I said goodbye to
Pippy
.

Inside
our room, I checked my phone messages. Rosie had called several times. While
Cody rested on the couch watching Disney Channel, I logged in my daily chat
time with Rose.

“Hey! How
are you?” she said.

“Good—tired,”
I admitted.

“Tell me
everything! I’m dying to know what it’s like…when you texted
me
that you were going shopping I just about passed out from jealousy!”

I
laughed. “It’s been good day so far—shopping in New York City is pretty fun if
you have the cash to spend. Mr. Ross’s assistant is a great gal; she helped me
pick out some evening dresses. You wouldn’t believe how many formal events
these people put on over here.”

“So
what’s
he
like?”

“Who?
Mr. Ross?”

“Don’t be
coy with me. I Googled him! He’s a
hottie
!”

Oy
.
“He’s…insufferable.”

She
laughed—hard.
“No way!
God doesn’t make packages that
pretty for them to be rotten inside.”

“Well, he
might not be rotten, but he certainly isn’t ripe. He’s…I don’t know. He’s a
mystery.”

“
Oooh
Mysterious, huh?
I don’t
know…I think you’re holding something back.” Her tone lowered as if she was
about to share a secret. “I would absolutely
love
to know what he thinks about you, though. I read he was a
bachelor—a very rich bachelor. And I bet he was pretty surprised when he met
you for the first time.”

“Why do
you say that?” I snapped, remembering that introduction with vivid clarity.

“Because that picture on your blog is awful, Angie.
It looks
nothing like you! I told you to change it months ago.”

“Hey! I
like
that picture. Cody had just won his
first soccer game; it was a proud moment.” I huffed into the phone, furrowing
my eyebrows.

“Okay,
sure…it was a good moment. But it was also ninety-five degrees outside and your
hair was in a ponytail, not to mention it only shows half your face…the other
half is of a soccer field!
A soccer field
!”
she repeated. “All I’m saying is I would have loved to have seen his face when
he met you. I bet you’re the most gorgeous author he’s ever had work with his
company.”

Now it
was my turn to laugh heartily. If only the truth of our meeting wasn’t so
humiliating, I would retell that shining moment in my history. But it was too
embarrassing to recount, even to Rosie.

“Well,
keep on dreaming, sister. You didn’t miss anything. And I can assure you that
Jackson Ross doesn’t think anything about me—not in the way you’re insinuating
anyway.

It was
nice to catch up with Rosie. She was my connection to home—and real life. I
filled her in on my phone call with Jenny and made sure she would follow up with
her. She agreed. After our call ended, I closed my eyes. I just needed a few
minutes… what could it hurt?

I awoke
with a start to my phone buzzing beside me. A glance at the bedside clock sent
my pulse into overdrive.
Oh,
my gosh
! I’ve been asleep for over an hour!

The phone
kept buzzing and I answered. It was
Pippy
.

 
“Hey, I just wanted you to know I won’t be
there tonight. I have to fix a scheduling crisis with a couple of the
interviews for Monday.”

 
“Oh.” I had only known
Pippy
for a couple days, but already she felt like my safety blanket in this world of
unknowns. I was disappointed…and nervous to go without her.

 
“Don’t worry—you’ll do great. It’s purely
recreational tonight. Just get to know the others and have a great time.”

I wanted
to ask her if Jackson would be attending—the question was on the tip of my
tongue during our entire conversation, but I refused to indulge my demented
curiosity.

 
“I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon at the
signing.”

 
“Oh, on a Sunday?”
I
asked.

 
“Yes, the tour doesn’t allow for many
breaks—sorry.”

 
“Okay…thanks for calling,
Pippy
.
See you tomorrow.”

We had an
hour before Walt would be here to get us for dinner, and
—wait, where are the dresses?
I stumbled into the front room, and
saw several large garment bags sitting on the couch next to Cody, who was
playing on his new best pal, Mr.
iPad
.

“Did you
answer the door while I was sleeping, Cody?”

“Uh, I
looked through the peephole first, mom. I promise.” Cody glanced up and me
quickly before returning to the wonder of his gaming device.

Before I could unleash a mom-lecture, my eyes drifted to the bags
again, mouth going dry.

This isn’t right…there are too many. One,
two, three…six! Six bags!

Scooping
them up in my arms, I laid the selections on my bad and then paced my floor as
I tried to understand how this mistake could have been made. As I got up the
nerve to open each bag, my stomach dropped to my knees.

“No.” My
voice was a shaky whisper as I pulled out the beautiful champagne-colored gown
from one of the garment bags.

All I
could think about was the price of this one gown, one gown which could have
paid my rent for nearly three months. Searching every last corner of each garment
bag for the receipt I had specifically asked
Pippy
to
supply me with, I turned up empty handed.

I texted
Pippy
about the error, asking
her to call me as soon as she could.

No reply.

The clock
was ticking, and I had to get ready for dinner. I exhaled, envisioning the
fancy boutique rejecting my request to return the items without a receipt. Tears
pressed behind my eyes as I calculated the cost of such a mistake. I’d be
paying Pinkerton Press back for a very long time.
 

I was
never frivolous. I’d lived lean for long enough to know that squandering money
on temporary pleasures only resulted in the sacrifice of essentials: groceries,
gas, utilities. Instead of pre-paying our rent and catching up on past-due
bills with the advance money I’d received, now I had a closet full of silk to
show for it.

My chest
ached.

By the
time Cody and I got into the car, my mind was so far down a rabbit trail of
worry that I was in no mood to keep anyone company. Clothed in a money-sucking,
plum-colored ensemble, I had just single-handedly thrown away more money than I
had seen in years.

I
followed Cody through the dimly lit Italian restaurant, a symphony of swoony
romance music dominating the atmosphere. I loved it immediately.

We were
the last to arrive. Two agents, three editors and four authors sat staring at
their menus—but Jackson was not present. Formal introductions were made around
the table before our waiter came by to get our drink orders.

 
“Mom, do they have spaghetti here?” Cody
whispered in my ear.

 
“Yes, sweetheart, probably the best you’ve
ever eaten.” I glanced at the prices on the menu and sucked in a breath. I’d
never seen a dish of noodles cost so much.

 
“May I sit here?”

I looked
up to see Jackson Ross peering down at me.

My
stomach flipped like a gymnast on a trampoline. Every molecule of moisture in
my mouth was sucked into a black hole.

 
“Sure.” I leaned into Cody while he sat down
next to me.