All Who Dream (Letting Go) (13 page)

It was a
warm day—very warm. I was glad I had chosen to wear shorts, so had Jackson.
Seeing him in something other than his daily suits made him seem more
human—less CEO, and more average guy (although Jackson Ross could never be
average). It was like seeing a picture of the President playing with his dog,
or out for a jog—there was a connection to
normal
society with such photos.

The Bronx
Zoo was gorgeous, like walking through a colorful, well-maintained garden. I
loved the plants and scenery almost as much as I loved watching Cody’s face
light up at each exhibit. He loved animal facts, so we couldn’t pass a sign
without him stopping to read it. I watched Jackson, checking for indications of
impatience as these fact-interruptions were continuous, but he seemed
legitimately interested in the things Cody discovered.

Cody had
the map in his hand and led the way as we strolled behind him. So far we had
seen: bears, tigers, elephants, zebras, giraffes and gorillas. We had also
watched the penguin feeding show, which was my favorite event so far. Cody
though, was most looking forward to the Madagascar exhibit. I sipped on a large
ice water as Cody ate his way through a giant blue puff of cotton candy. I had
turned down lunch for fear of a recurring episode of last night’s humiliation,
but I regretted that decision now.

A massive
headache was brewing in the back corner of my brain as we strolled through the
paths leading to
Madagascar
. As
usual, Jackson was overly observant.

“You’re
not feeling well again.” Jackson scrutinized me.

“I’m
fine…it’s just a headache.”

“Give me
your hand.”

“What?”

He
furrowed his brows, “Just give me your hand…
please
.”

My face
heated. “Okay?”

Cody had
stopped a few feet ahead and was reading a sign on the Madagascan Tree Boa as
Jackson took my hand in his. My stomach knotted at his touch. He laid my hand
flat on top of his, and with his other hand pressed a spot between my pointer
finger and thumb. The relief in my head was nearly instant.

 
“Oh,
my gosh
…that’s
amazing.”

He
continued to press firmly as we started to walk again, following Cody. How long
it had been since a man held my hand…

He’s only helping my headache, not holding
my hand! Get a grip.

 
“It’s a pressure point.”

 
“Huh…how long are you supposed to do it for?” Was
it too much to
hope
 
he’d
say an hour?

 
“One minute increments.
The pressure usually cures after a couple of times.”

A minute
passed and he let go. I prayed the disappointment wouldn’t show on my face.

 
“Better?”

 
“Much. Thank you.”

 
“You should probably eat something soon.
Figure out where you want to go for dinner… I think we’ve seen pretty much
everything here.”

The air
in my lungs went buoyant. At least our dinner routine was still on, even though
our day had been drastically detoured.

After the
Nile Crocodiles, we headed for the exit trail, but Cody stopped abruptly and searched
the map in his hand.

“Mom?
Can we see one last thing before we go?”

“Sure…is
it on our way out?” I asked.

 
“Yeah, it’s right there…the butterfly garden.”

 
“Um-”

Cody smirked
at me and peered up at Jackson. “Do you want to come with me, Mr. Ross?”

 
“Sure. Aren’t you coming?” Jackson asked me.

 
“I—um-”

 
“She doesn’t like butterflies.”

Jackson’s
eyebrows shot up as he looked from me to Cody.

 
“It’s true,” I said.

 
“How is that even possible? Who doesn’t like
butterflies?” The corners of Jackson’s mouth lifted. His gaze was incredulous.

I bit my
cheeks and shifted uncomfortably, hoping Cody wouldn’t say more.

No.
Such.
Luck.

 
“She’s afraid of them.”

 
“What? No—you’re joking. No one has
butterfly-phobia.” Jackson’s mouth gaped.

 
“Well, technically, it’s not just butterflies.
It’s all flying insects.
Aviophobia
is the correct
term.”

Jackson’s
expression froze, and then he cracked up. His laugh was deep, loud and
uncontrolled.
Can a woman fall in love
with a sound?
Even though the reaction was at my expense, I couldn’t help
but laugh with Jackson, nor could Cody.

 
“
Aviophobia
?
That is best
thing I’ve heard in months,” Jackson said, “Come on Cody, let’s go before your
mom decides she’s afraid of grass…or air.”

 
“Hey! It’s a real thing!” I called after them.

Jackson’s
laugh tickled my ears even after he was out of sight. I hugged myself, grinning
like one of the local hyenas.

I just made Jackson Ross laugh.

That
sound had secured a place in my top-ten favorite sounds of all time…maybe even
in my top three. I had to hear it again.
 

I was
growing quite fond of New York.

Jackson’s small black sports car was very different than the
car we’d been traveling around in for the last couple of weeks with Walt. I
didn’t know anything about cars, but I definitely hadn’t been
inside
a car like this before.
Everything was shiny, sleek, and compact and…shiny.

“So, where to?”

I looked
at the clock. It was just after five. I tapped the pendant at my neck. The idea
of going out to a restaurant was nauseating—literally, but I was starting to
feel very hungry. Jackson eyed me, waiting.

“Do you
have a kitchen?” I ventured in a small voice. .

 
“What kind of a question is that? Where do you
think I live—a cardboard box?”

I
laughed—hard.

 
“I’m thinking I’d like to
make
dinner…but my tiny kitchen doesn’t really accommodate such a
task.”

 
“Are you inviting yourself over?” His smile
was devilish.

I rolled
my eyes and nodded toward Cody. “I’m asking if I can make us all dinner.”

He stared
at me, lips pursed. “I think that sounds…nice.”

 
“Mom’s a great cook,” Cody piped up from the
backseat. “Do you have any movies Mr. Ross?

 
“Hmm…not really.
I
don’t watch a lot of TV. I usually read if I have free time.”

 
“I love to read, too!” Cody said.

 
“Yeah?
What are your
favorites?” Jackson pulled out of the zoo parking lot into the flow of traffic.

 
“I love
Choose
Your Own Adventure
books,” Cody said.

 
“Oh, I used to read those…it’s nice to feel in
control of a storyline, isn’t it?”

 
“Yeah.”

I glanced
at Jackson and
smiled,
he caught my eye and smiled
back. Goosebumps washed over my body like an ocean wave.

 
“I’ll need to stop at a store and pick up some
things,” I said.

 
“There’s one very close to where I live. Cody
can pick out a movie at the
Redbox
if he wants.”

I looked
back at Cody who had been quiet for a while, only to find he had passed out—asleep.
I laughed as I told Jackson.
 

 
“So…can I ask you?”

 
“Ask me what?” he said.

 
“About my Google
discoveries?”

He raised
an eyebrow at me which set off a rapid increase in my heart rate.

 
“Oh. That,” he groaned. “Okay…”

I waited
for him to say more—to give me parameters or limitations—but he said nothing
else. I took his silence as a
free-for-all
.

 
“Your family started Pinkerton Press back in
the 1940’s?”

 
“True.”

I smiled.
So this was his game.
True
or False.

 
“Your great-grandfather was the founder?”

 
“True. Teddy Ross.”

 
“Oh? Is that a relation to the building I’m
staying at?
The T. Ross?”

 
“Yep…he had a gift in real-estate as well.”

 
“You have one brother? Jacob? He’s older?”

 
“True.”

 
“Is he
Pippy
and
Peter’s dad?”

 
“True.”

 
“So…he’s…”

 
“Twelve years older—he’s my half-brother.”

 
“Oh! Wow…more than a one word answer. I feel
quite privileged.”

He
grunted, but I saw a corner of his mouth creep upward.

Bingo.

 
“Okay…so…back to it then. Um…you became the
CEO two years ago after your brother became ill?”

His face
tightened, and immediately wanted to retract my insensitive question. I opened
my mouth to-

 
“Don’t you say
it.
” He
dropped his hand on my knee.

I froze
and looked up at him.

How did he know I was about to apologize?

 
“If there were restrictions on the questions
you could ask, I would have said so. And that one…is true.”

I exhaled
as he removed his hand. “But it wasn’t what you wanted to do—work for the
family company I mean?

I hadn’t
read that online, but there was something on his face that indicated such.

 
“It wasn’t my plan, no.”

 
“You said you’d traveled a lot after
college…what were you doing?”

 
“Living my dreams…or so I thought.”

I wanted
to ask him more, to find out what the mysterious Jackson Ross was doing prior
to becoming a corporate man, but I didn’t.

 
“Are you close with your brother?”

He smiled
at me, as if grateful for the diversion.

 
“We’ve had our issues, but yes. He’s a very
good man. Tell me about yours,” he added.

I nodded.
Warmth spread through me that he had remembered our conversation last night
when I mentioned Briggs.

 
“I could write a book about Briggs. He’s quite
the character. A reformed bad-boy by the world’s standards, but even through
his rough seasons, he’s always had the most loyal heart. He’s funny,
spontaneous, strong-willed… and he loves Cody as if he were his own. He just
married an incredible girl, too. She’s tamed him quite a bit.” I smiled,
thinking of Charlie. “I’ve never seen him happier.”

Jackson
went quiet, then, and so did I. I gazed out the window, watching the crowded
sidewalks slide behind us. Life here was so different from what I knew; yet as
I glanced at Jackson, I realized
different
had many definitions.

And
sometimes different was exactly what was needed.

Whatever notions I had convinced myself about earlier in
regard to Jackson being a normal man in
camo
shorts slid to wayside the second we pulled into his condo’s
garage. I was far from well-versed in New York real estate, but it didn’t take
a genius to figure out that Jackson’s condo was…expensive. With several grocery
bags in hand, and a movie rental for Cody, we walked through a lobby that made
the corporate apartment building I’d been staying at look like a second-hand
store. We rode the elevator up to the twenty-third floor—to which I didn’t
cringe or imagine myself tragically plummeting to my death—and entered the French
doors to Jackson’s home.

My jaw
needed to be shoveled off the floor. I couldn’t stop Cody’s observations or
“oohs and
ahhs
” because I couldn’t speak.

I
followed Jackson past the living area to the kitchen that reflected our images
every which way we turned. Everything was stainless, black and smooth….and
shiny
.

There was
a definite theme going on here.

 
“Here we are,” Jackson said, placing the bags
on the black granite countertop.

The place
made me feel inconspicuous. Everything was perfect. There wasn’t a single spec
of dirt, or even a physical sign that someone actually
lived
in this stunning residence. It was like looking through the
windows of my old Barbie Dream Mansion…only nothing here was made of plastic,
and nothing was hot pink.

Jackson
waved his hand over my eyes as if attempting to wake me from a trance. “It’s
just a place to sleep.”

I gaped
at his casual tone.
Uh,
hardly.

 
“Right…” I pulled several items out of the
grocery bag as Cody took his backpack over to the couch and laid back, relaxed.
I smiled. The kid could adapt to anything quickly: even a plush condo in
Manhattan.

 
“So…put me to work,” Jackson said, washing his
hands in the fanciest faucet I’d ever seen.

 
“Oh? Okay…um…” I glanced at the ingredients
surrounding me.

 
“You’re not so good at delegating are you?” He
lifted an eyebrow.

I frowned
as he chuckled, “It’s been a long time since I’ve had a helper in the kitchen
that could use knives or work on the stovetop.” I looked over at Cody who was
busy playing on his iPad.