All That Matters (10 page)

She wasn’t ready to face going to bed just then, wondering if he was thinking about sharing that big bed with her. There wasn’t anything wrong with that, she knew. After all, they were legally married, even if it was only an agreement between friends. But how much could she ask of her friend? Had she already asked too much?

Passing the sofa on her way to the bathroom, she realized there was no way that short piece of furniture would hold his long, lean body. She had to admit she’d enjoyed looking at his hard-muscled arms and work-honed torso last night. And today in his swim trunks...well, his other attributes hadn’t escaped her notice, either.

Sleeping on the sofa wasn’t her idea of comfort. Besides, they hadn’t really gotten a restful sleep on the floor of her apartment the previous night, so they both deserved the comfort of that luxurious bed. If she could convince him.

He was sprawled out face down on the bed when she came out of the bathroom wearing a pair of khaki cotton shorts and a yellow tank top. His soft snore broke the stillness, and she debated whether to wake him or not. He looked like a little boy all tuckered out after a hard day at play.

Faith knew that wasn’t the case, since she doubted Buddy Lee had ever played much as a child. The few bits of gossip she’d managed to piece together about his early life convinced her that after his mother died, his childhood had been a difficult one. And knowing what she did about his father, she wasn’t surprised.

The cushy chair near the bed was the perfect spot to observe him without his knowing. She was tempted to do just that but thought better of it. She really wanted to walk on the beach, and it wasn’t all that late.

“Buddy Lee.” She shook his shoulder. “I’m ready.”

He rolled over, clamped his hand around her wrist, and growled low in his throat. “Me, too.”

“What do you mean?” She jumped back, startled by his sudden move and the dazed look in his eyes.

Instantly, he released her hand and sat upright in bed.

“Oh, jeez, Faith, I’m sorry.” He raked a shaky hand through his hair. “I must’ve been dreaming. Did I hurt you?”

The concern in his voice was genuine.

“It’s okay,” she quickly assured him. I should’ve let you sleep. We don’t have to go for a walk. Those famous two moons are probably an advertising gimmick, anyway.”

The waterbed rolled when she sat beside him and all at once, she was sliding, bumping his arm with her shoulder and knocking him back against the pillows. Like a sports replay in slow motion, they rocked back and forth, riding the wavy mattress, and grabbing for each other to keep from toppling backwards on the bed in a tangle of limbs.

Before Faith could right herself, she was wrapped in Buddy Lee’s embrace with her face only inches from his. His breathing was harsh and more than a little unsteady. His heart thudded against her own. She saw her reflection in his eyes and thought she read desire in their darkness. Felt her body grow warm beneath his.

Then he slowly dipped his head, and in a move that seemed more right than wrong, she lifted her mouth to his. Whatever else was to come, she knew she wanted this moment to cherish.
 
A moment she might never have again.

Buddy Lee’s head swam with the magic of kissing Faith.
 
Better than the kiss they’d exchanged on their wedding day, this one shared more than lips. A lot more. Her soft curves pressed against his hard angles. Her mouth moved seductively under his, tempting—inviting.
 
He swore he wouldn’t do more than kiss her, but damn, she tasted so sweet, he wanted this moment to last forever. To hell with going for a walk.

She shifted her hips, and he tugged her closer. It was all he could do to keep from sinking between those silky legs of hers. Instead, he kept his mouth angled over hers, their tongues meeting in a heated, sensuous dance. He tunneled one hand through her hair, cupped the back of her head, and tilted it back just enough to give him access to her throat. He trailed hot kisses to the delicate hollow there, then journeyed down to
 
where the swell of her breasts pushed against the edge of her knit top.

When her fingers dug into his shoulders and he heard a soft whimper escape her lips, he knew he had to stop before
 
something happened they’d both regret. A pain like none he’d ever felt before squeezed his heart with such force he had to move away in order to breathe again.

“I...I’m sorry. That never should’ve happened,” he whispered, pressing both her hands to his chest and gazing into her questioning eyes. “Believe me, I understand the rules of our marriage. Just friends, right?” He doubted his heart would ever beat normally after this. It rocketed around in his chest like a flying saucer off its orbit. Damn, he wanted her.

“F...friends, sure,” Faith stammered, pulling her hands free to straighten her clothing and tuck a wayward lock of hair behind her ear. Then with a shaky laugh and a shrug, she said, “We can always blame it on the tropical sunset.”

Yeah, right. If the sunsets here were that powerful, Buddy Lee didn’t dare watch any more of them. Too dangerous. Faith had every reason to think he was no better than that lowlife Royce Webb. The sympathetic understanding in her voice made him feel like something scraped off the bottom of a shoe.

Dammit
, Walker, this is Faith, for
cryin
’ out loud.

She’s your friend. What the hell were you thinking?
 
She’s pregnant. She asked you for help, not sex.

He stomped out onto the patio in search of a cooling breeze, but got slapped with the hot, humid stillness of the night instead.

He needed to get out of here.
 
Digging in his pocket in search of enough money to buy another beer at the beach bar he’d seen earlier, he froze when his fingers brushed the tiny velvet package he’d put there earlier. Reluctantly, he withdrew the pouch and held it, remembering.

That morning on his way to pick up Faith, he’d dashed into the jeweler’s shop in Granite City with his heart in his throat.
 
Not at all sure his meager funds would even purchase a ring worthy of giving her, he had still wanted her to have something more fitting than his heavy class ring.

Spotting a simple gold band engraved with two hearts among the dozens of glittery diamond rings on display, he’d immediately asked the price and discovered happily that it was within his means. He’d intended to give it to her before they boarded the plane, but the opportunity hadn’t come up then, so he’d decided to wait... For what, he didn’t know.

Now that he’d made a total ass of himself, he didn’t think giving her the ring was going to help redeem his standing with her. He was still staring at the little drawstring pouch when Faith appeared at his side.

She pointed to the contents of his hand. “What’s that?”

She’d evidently repaired her make-up and combed her hair, because there was no trace of the hot and heavy tussle they’d shared just minutes before. Her eyes held no condemnation, either, but instead, sparkled with curiosity and something else he couldn’t quite figure out.

How could she be so calm? Hadn’t what they’d almost done in there bothered her at all? Jeez
Looeeze
! Was he the only one with a libido in overdrive? Or maybe he just didn’t affect her in
that
way. Yeah, that was probably it.

Whatever the reason, he was happy to see her smiling. He’d have to live with the fact that understanding her just wasn’t gonna happen. Not in this lifetime.

“May I see?”
 
She held out her hand.

Persistent as always, Buddy Lee thought, and nodding, he reluctantly dropped the pouch into her cupped hand. “Yeah, sure. It’s for you anyway.” Might as well give it to her. Didn’t matter now.

“Really?”

Her eyes lit up like they always did when she was excited.
 
Like they had only minutes before when they’d shared that ‘knock-your-socks-off’ kiss. Whoa! He couldn’t help the hitch of anticipation in his chest or the rush of heat burning his cheeks.

Faith emptied the contents of the pouch in her hand and gave a little cry of delight when she spied the ring.

“Oh, Buddy Lee, it’s perfect. Thank you.” She threw her arms around his neck in a quick hug, then stepped back as if having second thoughts about getting too close.

“You’re welcome,” he mumbled. Shoot, were those tears making her eyes all bright and damp?

She fingered his heavy class ring hanging from a gold chain around her neck. “Does this mean you want
yours
back?”

“Only if you don’t want it.” She could keep it forever and he’d be happy. “Does this one fit?” He’d made a guess at her ring size and hoped he was close.

When he looked down, she already had it on her finger and the gold chain that held his class ring was tucked safely beneath her shirt.

“Oh, yes, it’s just right. Perfectly beautiful.” She waved her hand in front of him, then steadied it, obviously waiting for his approval. Her endearing smile touched him, as always.

“Not as beautiful as you, Faith,” he said, instantly regretting that he’d spoken his thoughts out loud.

Big, green eyes widened. “That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me, Buddy Lee.” She slipped her hand in his. “Can we still take that walk?”

There was something almost sad in the way she looked at him right then. Like she was seeing him differently and wishing he was someone else. He wondered if she regretted her rash decision to dump Royce. No, not Faith. She’d never accept the sort of abuse the man had subjected her to. And Buddy Lee would make sure that never happened again. He didn’t give a damn what kind of threats Royce had made. No one was going to hurt Faith. Or an innocent baby. He might not be the perfect choice for a husband and father, but he’d give it his best shot for as long as she needed him. Did he dare to hope for a lifetime?

And he’d keep his hands where they belonged from now on, too, even if it killed him. Their friendship was too important to risk losing it simply because he’d forgotten the boundaries set a long time ago. Being "Boyd’s boy" was something he couldn’t escape. Not even being married to Faith could change that. He knew he’d never escape the ache in his heart, either, but he would learn to live with it.

Maybe walking was a good thing. If they walked far enough, he’d be too tired when they returned to notice how uncomfortable the sofa was, and hopefully, she’d be too tired to argue with him. “Sure, let’s go.” He followed her to the door.

A warm tropical night and a walk on the beach with a beautiful girl had the power to stir a man’s blood, scattering his thoughts in all the wrong directions. He knew he was dangerously close to telling Faith how he felt about her. He also knew beyond a doubt that he couldn’t. Not now. Maybe not ever.

His heavy heart constricted as he watched her walk ahead of him, bare feet kicking up little puffs of sand. Moonbeams danced across the water, bathing her in silvery shadows.

She turned back to him and waved. “Come on, slow poke.”

The teasing invitation tempted, but her breathtaking loveliness stopped him right in his tracks as bittersweet longing filled his soul.

If only he could turn the clock back and start this day over. There were so many things he would do differently. More than anything, he wished he could tell her he loved her.

L
ater, back in their room, the phone connection between Dos
Lunas
and Liberty crackled and spit in Buddy Lee’s ear, but there was no mistaking Scooter’s gruff voice on the other end.

“Hey, Walker, ‘bout time you checked in. Where in
tarnation
are you?”

“Never mind,” he snapped back. “I just want to know if everything is okay at the shop. I tried to call you last night, but you weren’t around.”

He was in a foul mood and knew it, but politeness wasn’t a priority right then. Not after the miserable night he’d just spent trying to keep from falling off the damned sofa. His aching muscles weren’t exactly putting a smile on his face this morning, either. Besides, Scooter didn’t need to know any more than the bare details of this pretend honeymoon. Tomorrow afternoon when he and Faith got home would be soon enough to deal with that.

“So, how’s it going?” he persisted, since Scooter didn’t seem inclined to offer any information on his own.

“Well, other than the security alarm
goin
’ off at your place for no reason, things are okay. The deputy sheriff and one of his boys came and checked everything out. Couldn’t find nothin’ wrong, so they figured the wind must’ve tripped the alarm.” Scooter wheezed out a cough. “I told ‘
em
the wind wasn’t that strong last night, but shoot, nobody ever pays any mind to what I say.”

“What?” Buddy Lee snapped to attention at Scooter’s matter-of-fact recital of events and fired back a barrage of questions.

“Are you sure nothing was taken? Did you check the Mustang?
 
Hell, I’ve only been gone since noon yesterday. What do you mean, no wind? How could the alarm go off for no reason?”

“Man, I don’t know,” Scooter whined. “I went over the whole dang shop. I didn’t see nothing that looked out of place. Oh, yeah, I covered the car. Guess you forgot about that in your hurry to get to...wherever.”