All or Nothing (18 page)

Ben opened his eyes to the darkness, reached his hand over, grabbed his phone off the bedside table, and checked the time. Just shy of five in the morning. Well, almost five hours of straight sleep. Not bad. More than he’d had in a long time.

He looked down at Presley sleeping on her stomach next to him with her hand on his chest. They had returned to the room over seven hours ago, urgently trying to undress each other, Presley even going so far as to shove him onto the bed, climbing on top of him and undressing him herself. Until he slowed her down.

He didn’t want to rush, not this time. He never considered himself a sentimental person, but watching his baby sister get married yesterday touched him. Those deep emotions flooded his body and soul, forcing him to go slow and savor the moment with Presley.

It was a change for them. They always seemed rushed, urgent, and frantic to get to each other, fueled by more desire than he ever had with another woman. Last night he wanted slow and steady. He wanted to hold her, feel every movement of her body, caress every inch of her—love her.

Afterward she had laid on his chest, her hand absently moving over his torso and abs. He didn’t think she was even aware of what she was doing. He had run his hand over her head, leaned down and kissed her forehead. “I’ll try not to break your heart.” She stilled, lifted her head and looked into his eyes, and he saw them fill with tears. “I promise. I’ll try my hardest not to ever hurt you.”

Sliding up his body, she placed her lips on his and said in return, “I’ll try my hardest not to hurt you either.”

Now, looking over at her, he realized he would do anything for her. He would lay his life on the line like he did for any of his men in the Navy. And as much as he was falling for her, the pressure that those feelings evoked in him was hard to reconcile.

Especially after everything that happened over a year and a half ago. But he would find a way to resolve the stress of it. Looking down at the ring on his finger, he thought to himself, he had to, because he wasn’t willing to let her go.

With a sigh of regret, he slid out of bed, grabbed a change of clothes, took a quick shower, then slipped out of the room without a sound, making his way through one more check of the floor. He had already checked twice before he fell asleep last night—unbeknownst to Presley—just in case there was anyone lingering in the halls.

The halls were quiet, not a sound to be heard. They had the whole floor blocked off for family and friends. Several people chose to drive home last night, especially those with kids, but a handful spent the night. A big storm had been in the forecast, though thankfully as luck would have it, it was pushed back and wouldn’t start until later tonight. At least the newlyweds would get off on their trip with no delays.

As Ben reached the end of the hall, he heard voices coming from his brother Phil’s room. Moving closer, he realized one voice was definitely female. The lucky dog, Ben thought with a smirk, then wondered who it was, since Phil had attended the wedding solo.

With his back to the wall and his ear to the door, his eyes widened when he recognized the voice. Oh boy, that could be trouble. And it didn’t sound like the voices were too happy on the other side right now, either.

When he heard the door handle turn, he moved quickly around the corner and out of sight, then waited until the coast was clear before returning to his own room.

That had indeed been a shock, one he didn’t see coming… and he saw everything coming before it happened.

***

Later that morning during breakfast, Presley looked around the table at the remaining wedding guests. Very few people were left: Ben’s immediate family, Ryan’s parents, Ryan, Kaitlin, Jack, Cori and Sophia. Brooke and Lucas had driven home last night with Beth and Mac, since they both wanted to get home to their children.

Kaitlin and Ryan seemed to be having the time of their life, not even looking a bit tired, even though she would bet anything they didn’t get much sleep last night. She knew if it were her wedding night, she wouldn’t have slept much at all.

Gazing around the table some more, she felt different. She actually felt like part of the family, just like Kaitlin had said last night. And that was odd for her, having never really belonged to a family or group of people quite like the ones around the table.

Last night, the group of girls had no blood relation to them at all. A few were brought together by marriage, but other than that, it was friendships. Stronger friendships than any blood relationship she had ever witnessed.

She was amazed at how she longed to be part of it. The funny thing was, she never really went looking for it, yet here it was, right in her lap. Crazy how things happened that way.

“Enjoying yourself? Not too much family overload, I hope?” Ben asked, drawing her right out of her thoughts and making her wonder how he always knew what was going on in her mind.

“Yes, I’m enjoying myself. And no, no family overload.”

He picked her hand up under the table and gave it a squeeze. “Good, then maybe you wouldn’t mind going to dinner at my mom’s in a few hours. I thought we could stop on the way home.”

“Dinner? She is okay with us just stopping over without warning?” Presley questioned, feeling unsure of herself again at the moment, and not positive why.

Ben shook his head, amusement evident. “She doesn’t care. I eat over there almost every Sunday, the same with Alec and Phil. Even Ryan and Kaitlin stop in a few times a month. There is always plenty of food.” Her uncertainty obviously showed on her face, causing Ben to squeeze her hand tighter, then lean in and give her a quick kiss on the lips in front of everyone. “Really, Presley,” he whispered against her lips. “It’s fine, but I can ask her right now if you want.”

“No, please don’t. I feel silly as it is. If you’re sure it’s okay, then yes, I’d like that.”

“If you didn’t act silly, then you wouldn’t feel that way. And yes, it’s good. I’ll tell her after breakfast. My guess is we’ll eat early. That will give us plenty of time to get back to Albany before the storm hits.”

She looked at his face, saw hope in his eyes, saw he was holding back something, and took a guess at what it was. “Want to stay at my place tonight?”

He squeezed her hand again. “Actually I was going to suggest you stay with me. If we get the amount of snow I think, then I need to get up and clear the driveway before work. Plus, you will be able to leave your car in the garage, no rushing to clean it off before you leave.”

That would be nice. Actually, this whole weekend was more than nice. It was homey… and domestic, if truth were told.
And
downright scary to her right now. Maybe she should go home and give herself some space.

“No pressure, Presley. I can drop you off at your place and go back to my house if you think you need a little alone time.”

Damn, how did he always know what she was thinking? Then again, she seemed to always know what was going on in his mind too. She fought to take him up on that offer. Part of her wanted to be alone, but the other part didn’t.

The other part of her was becoming dependent on Ben. She didn’t care for that feeling at all. But she needed to work it out on her own. It was her problem, not his. “No, your house is fine.” She leaned over and gave him a reassuring kiss.

He pulled her close, putting one arm around her shoulder and giving her a hug. Then she caught his mother’s knowing look and quickly averted her eyes, only to see Alec elbowing Phil while his brothers watched her and Ben’s every move. There was no escaping family at the moment, and she found she really didn’t care in the least.

***

“Getting a little cozy there, aren’t you?” Alec asked Ben a few hours later when Presley stood up to go to the bathroom.

“Alec,” William interrupted, “leave your brother alone.” There was no way he was letting his other sons mess this up for Ben. And if they started in on Ben, that could happen. He wouldn’t interfere any other way, other than to prevent his boys from ruining a good thing.

“Yeah, Alec. Leave me alone,” Ben said, laughing at Alec’s disgruntled look.

“Hey, Dad, you’ve never gotten in the middle of us before. Why now?” Phil asked, curiously.

William hated what he was about to say, but it had to be said. He just hoped Phil understood. “Because I like Presley. And if you two boys mess this up”—William stopped mid-sentence, then turned to Ben—“or you mess this up—then I’m taking you out of my will.” All of his boys laughed at him. He had made that threat plenty of times over the years, and they knew he was only kidding. But he wasn’t kidding about not wanting Ben to mess this up.

“Presley,” Ben said, leaning over and giving her shoulder a little nudge. “Wake up.” No sound or movement on her part. He bent over and gave her a kiss on the lips. “Hey, babe, wake up for a minute.”

“What?” she mumbled, her eyes fluttering open to see him looming over her.

“You can go back to sleep in a second, honey.” He ran his hand across her cheek. “There is a lot of snow out there and the streets aren’t cleared yet. The driveway is, though, and your car is fine in the garage. I’m going to work now. Don’t leave until the roads are clear enough though.”

“Okay,” she said sleepily.

He closed his eyes, breathed in her scent that he knew would be on his pillows and sheets later tonight when he went to bed, then gave her another kiss and walked out the door without making a noise.

***

Driving into work hours later, Presley marveled at the mess on the roads. Though they were clear enough for driving, they were still pretty slick. This type of weather always brought the crazies out and flooded the ER. She was never so glad to move over to the Pediatric Ward. Her one-year stint in the ER on third shift had been enough for her.

She parked her car, loving how easy it was to get up and just start it up and drive away this morning, something she had never been able to do in the dead of winter in her life. She always hated how long it took her to clean her car off and warm it up before she left in the winter.

Work for her should be slow tonight. She would be willing to bet most visitors were staying home, so the kids would be bored. She would have to think of something to entertain them so they didn’t get antsy.

For the most part, she loved her job. Loved working with the kids, even the seriously sick ones. They were such a challenge—and an inspiration.

She hated watching their fights and their struggles but loved their triumphs when they left healthy and strong. That more than made up for the few that didn’t leave at all, or didn’t leave strong enough to make it. She tried not to think of those children.

After punching in, she walked into Sarah’s room, saw her smiling face and thought this was one of her kids—because she thought of them as hers when they were here—that was going to leave strong and healthy. She refused to think otherwise. “What’s up there, girlie? How are you feeling?”

“I feel good,” Sarah said, then looked out the window and sighed.

“What’s wrong, Sarah?” Presley asked. Sometimes the teenage girls were the worst. She knew there was something on Sarah’s mind and guessing games could get tiring, but Presley was feeling too good this morning to even care.

Ben’s little endearments this morning when he woke her had warmed her good, sent her heart fluttering, and made all those nervous feelings about getting too close to him start to vanish.

“Nothing.”

“This is me you’re talking to,” she said knowingly.

Sarah changed the subject. “Is it really cold outside?”

“Yes, it is. And messy. I’ve never liked the winter or the snow,” Presley said with an exaggerated shiver.

“I do,” Sarah replied. “I like to ski.”

Ah, Presley thought, then walked over and sat on the corner of the bed. “You will be back out there this time next year.”

“Do you think? I mean honestly, Presley, I can take it. I can take the truth,” Sarah asked, fighting through the tears in her eyes and looking much older than her sixteen years.

“I really do, Sarah. You know I’m not a doctor, but your treatments are working. You’ve been told all of this. And you are strong and stubborn. Sometimes stubbornness is a good thing,” she said, patting Sarah’s hand.

“Ben doesn’t think so.”

“What? What doesn’t Ben think?” Presley couldn’t imagine Ben saying anything negative to Sarah regarding her recovery.

“He doesn’t think stubborn is a good thing.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“I heard him one day on the phone. He didn’t know I was there, but I heard him tell someone that you could be so stubborn, but he thought you would come around. Then he laughed, so maybe he thought it was funny.”

She just bet Ben did find it funny. Now she needed to figure out what he thought she was being so stubborn about. “When was this, Sarah?” Then Presley fought back the urge to cringe. She couldn’t believe she was talking to a sixteen-year-old about her relationship with Ben. It felt so juvenile even to her. Of course, it did make sense at the moment.

“It was a week ago. I think he was talking to his sister maybe. He said Kaitlin, and he told me his sister’s name one day. I didn’t hear everything, just that he would talk to you about it and not to worry.”

Presley ran her hand along Sarah’s leg. “I know what it is. And yes, I was being stubborn and I did come around.” Chuckling, Presley thought back to their conversation a little over a week ago regarding the spa day. Presley didn’t want to go and didn’t want to be part of it but knew that Kaitlin was pushing. In the end, guilt made her give in and spend the day with the bridal party, even though she wasn’t part of it. However, she was glad she did give in, because she really had enjoyed herself.

“That’s good. So he wasn’t mad at you?”

“No, not at all.” Presley stood up and smirked slightly. “Don’t worry about Ben. I can handle him.”

***

“Tell us about the wedding. Please, Presley?”

“I can’t, Allison,” Presley said to a fellow co-worker.

“Why can’t you? You went to one of the hottest weddings in the area and you can’t give us one little detail? You were even hanging with some of the big wigs here at the hospital,” Allison said in a whiny voice. The two nurses were talking at their station after Presley’s lunch break. Ben had just left for the night and all the kids were in their rooms. Everything was quiet at the moment.

Presley didn’t feel like Lucas, Brooke, Ben or Jack, were big wigs. Not at all, they were friends. More than friends it would seem. “They are people just like the rest of us. And those people were enjoying a wedding of their loved ones. All I can tell you is it was beautiful. The bride and groom were stunning and looked very much in love.”

“You are no fun, Pres. I was hoping for some juicy gossip,” Allison said, pouting.

“Sorry, no gossip. It was just a wedding, but a very lovely one.”

“I don’t believe you,” Missy, another co-worker, said, coming up to stand at the station. “At least tell us what Ben looks like in a tux. Better yet, show us a picture. I bet you have one on your phone,” she said, giving a sly look.

Yep, there was a picture of Ben in the tux on her phone, but it was for her and not for anyone else. She wasn’t sharing.

He hadn’t even known she had taken the picture, at least not at the time she took it. It was when he was looking at Kaitlin as she walked down the aisle. She had to freeze that moment in time. More so after he looked at her with that same gaze after the picture was snapped. Either way, it was for her and her only. “Sorry, ladies. You will all have to just imagine it in your mind.”

“Oh, we will be imagining it, all right,” Allison said. “Along with images of him out of it, too.” That comment caused a round of laughs, though Presley wasn’t thinking anything was funny about the girls picturing Ben out of his clothes. But she couldn’t blame them. She had done plenty of that before they started dating.

Only now that she was dating him, she didn’t want anyone else doing it.

Missy reached over and grabbed the phone when it rang at the station, and Presley watched as her smile vanished, before hanging up. “That was the security dispatcher. There is something going on in the ER and all wards are being told to have staff and patients stay put. Thankfully, visiting hours are over, but I’ll go out and see if anyone is sleeping in the waiting room. I’m sure we can let them in here for the moment.”

“What’s going on? Did they say?” Presley asked, feeling a great deal of dread creeping up her spine. If there was trouble she knew who would be the first one trying to get a handle on the situation. Even though Ben had left her only thirty minutes ago, she was willing to bet he was in the thick of things right now.

“Sorry, they didn’t give me any details,” Missy said, then walked out the door toward the waiting room.

Presley leaned over, picked up the phone and called the dispatch. They knew who she was, but it just kept ringing. Again, not a good sign. Maybe he was just calling all the wards and warning everyone. Five minutes later, and several more tries, her call was answered. “Sorry, Presley, I really shouldn’t say,” Bob replied.

“Can’t you just tell me something? Ben’s down there, isn’t he?”

“Yes, he was just leaving the building when the call came in, so of course he is there. But I’m not at liberty to say anything else.”

“Okay, thanks, Bob. I understand.”

“Presley,” Missy shouted, running back through the doors. “I just heard there is someone with a gun in the ER.”

Not waiting around for any more information, Presley left the floor and made her way toward Ben.