All of You (9 page)

A long, thoughtful silence stretched out before Stella quietly said, “I know you miss Mom and that your leg is bugging you, but we both know something else is really eating at you right now.” She paused. “Do you want to talk about it, Kat?”

When Kat shook her head, Stella grabbed her hand and squeezed. “Not the end of the world, you know? Worse things could happen.”

Kat barked out a harsh laugh. “Yeah? Like what?”

Stella turned to face her. “He’s a good man, Kat. A good friend and good police officer. I know he’s a bit of a fixer-upper-” Kat snorted. “But, if you want my opinion, I think he’s worth it. No, I
know
he’s worth it.”

Kat waved off her words. “I’ve been sort of…lonely…lately, that’s all. Fi’s been working a lot, you’ve been busy with the baby, and everyone else has their own lives, too. Stellan is always with Christopher and there are only so many
Matlock, Murder She Wrote
, and
Diagnosis Murder
marathons I can stomach with Pops.” Kat shrugged. “It makes sense I might start forming a silly, illogical attachment to any relatively attractive man in the general vicinity – total mess of a human being or not.”

“I didn’t see an ‘illogical attachment’ in your eyes out there,” Stella said softly.

Kat faced Stella. “You saw
pity
, for a man who is so unused to normal interactions that he hardly knew what to do with himself when faced with some. No more, no less.” Kat huffed. “And you’re talking like he’d be interested in
me,
which – even if I was at all interested in
him
 – would not be the case. Trust me…not his type, Stella. Too many brain cells. And all of this is moot, anyway, because I have zero interest in Danny that way. Or any other way, for that matter.”

“Can’t fool me, Kat. I know what I saw.”

There was a crash and Gia started wailing.

Stella stood and backed up slowly toward the door, wagging her finger at Kat. “But you
are
good, I’ll give you that. So good, I think you’ve actually fooled yourself. Doesn’t matter, though…” Stella smiled slyly. “These things have a way of working themselves out.” She winked. “Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. I won’t tell the other sisters.” She opened the door. “I’ll be back to check on you in a few minutes,
cara
.”

Stella slipped out in the hallway and shut the door behind her and Kat huffed again.

So what if she found Danny MacDonough attractive? For Christ’s sake, who didn’t? The man
was
attractive, no subjectivity about it. So Kat finding him attractive really wasn’t at all surprising or newsworthy.

And was it really any wonder she’d had a porno-caliber sex dream about him? Kat hadn’t so much as kissed a man in over five years; it was surprising she wasn’t having sex dreams about the seventy-five year old, toothless greeter at the Walmart around the corner.

Kat was a relatively healthy young woman with physical needs…was it really so outrageous that her subconscious had chosen a hot, single man she’d spent considerable time with as the go-to guy?

No, it wasn’t. On all counts.

Kat had taken enough neuroscience and psychology courses to have this all figured out.

Done and done and doesn’t mean shit.

That issue dealt with, Kat pushed to her feet.

The door opened suddenly and Danny stuck his head in. “Oh, I’m sorry. Nathan asked me to find Gia’s diaper bag in the guest bedroom and-”

Another acute pain shot down Kat’s leg and it buckled a bit at the knee. She gasped, reaching for any piece of the bunk bed she could latch onto. But before she managed to grab anything, Danny’s arms were around her.

“I’ve got you. No worries. Just hold onto to me,” he said softly.

“I’m fine.” Kat instinctively pushed back, unwilling to accept any help – especially from
him
. Her eyes swarmed with tears of humiliation and frustration as she did her best to extract herself. “Please let me go.”

But she was no match for him physically. Danny was too tall, too well-built, and too strong for her struggle to make the slightest difference. He’d put his arms around her and that’s where they’d stay until he decided to remove them.

Kat made the grave error of grabbing his biceps. She’d done it to push him away, but the moment her hands wrapped around those huge, chiseled muscle masses, her mouth went dry, her good leg went weak, and a swarm of stupid butterflies took flight in her abdominopelvic cavity. Her hands unconsciously gripped his arms harder, fingertips curling into the fabric of his shirt and around the flexing muscles.

God, Kat despised the way he smelled, clean and aftershave-y, with just a hint of expensive cologne. She hated the way she wanted to bury her nose in the crisp cotton of his dress shirt and huff him until she’d had her fill.

She hated that he was so strong and was seeing her vulnerable and weak…and she
really
hated that, had he stopped being such a stubborn, arrogant ass and let her go, she would have crumpled to the floor.

But most of all Kat hated that he’d already made a thousand women feel this way and would probably make another thousand feel this way before it was all said and done.

And that his effect on woman was such an innate part of him that he took it for granted. Took for granted Kat would love this whole fake Superman act – that she would probably gobble it up like the love-starved woman he clearly thought she was underneath it all.

Screw. Him.

She stopped struggling, inhaling deeply and then exhaling slowly. In her best no-nonsense voice, she said, “Let. Me. Go.”

“I’m sure my hands on your body must disgust you, but I’m the only one here, so let’s both make the best of it, okay?”

His voice had taken on a harsh edge Kat couldn’t identify. He almost sounded…hurt. But when he spoke again, the edge was gone, replaced by his normal congenial cadence. “Just breathe. When the pain passes, I’ll set you down on the bed.”

“
Who says I’m in pain
,” she gritted out, as, of course, another pain migrated down her leg.

“I says,” he replied like the juvenile he was, which only made Kat start pushing against him harder.

Danny chuckled low and deep above her ear. “Might as well stop struggling, Kitty-Kat. You’re not gonna win this one.”

Oh…
hell no
.

‡

“Y
ou do realize
this is bordering on unlawful restraint, don’t you?” Kat said in that cool, detached voice of hers.

She’d be shocked to know it only made Danny want to hold her tighter.

Want to fuck her even more.

He pulled back enough to see her face, a slight grin on his. “Nah, no restraint. Just a really chivalrous guy watching out for a real pain-in-the-ass girl,” Danny said, teasing her…absolutely loving the narrowing of her eyes. “Trust me, I’m a cop. I know these things.”

Danny had no desire to hold Kat against her will, but he knew if he let her go, she’d fall. He felt the tension in her overextended muscles and the shakiness of the entire right side of her body. The pain must have been radiating on-and-off pretty rapidly, because she’d tense up with it and relax a few seconds later when it passed. And there was no way he was just going to toss her on the bottom bunk and call it a day.

So, despite her obvious aggravation with his nearness, Danny had no choice but to keep his arms wrapped around her.

Which he was enjoying
way
too much.

Danny never dreamed he’d get the chance to touch her like this, to be this close to her. Damn, she felt
good
…and she smelled even better.

Danny dropped his nose slightly and inhaled…

Warm and a little spicy, with some sweetness, too…

It was all very subtle and alluring.

Danny wanted to rip her clothes off and bury his face
everywhere
. And lick every square inch of her smooth, olive skin.

He was shocked at how much touching her was affecting him. Danny had put his hands on more women than he’d ever be able to count, but he’d never experienced anything like this. His heart was pounding against his ribcage like a jackhammer, every muscle in his body was tensed up, and he felt slightly light-headed.

Pull yourself together, man! If you go down, she goes down.

But she just felt so good against his body – tiny and tight, with perfect handful-sized tits he was dying to suck on…

Well, you’ve officially sunk to a new low. The woman is in pain and all you can think about is how much you want to fuck her.

All class, as usual.

“Danny?” Kat’s voice broke through his shameful thoughts, only making things worse.

Because the sound of his name on her lips sent every available drop of blood in his body straight to his dick.

Danny gave himself a hard mental shake. “Uh, yeah?”

“I think it’s passed. You can set me on the bed now.” Kat pushed at his biceps again, and this time Danny loosened his hold a bit.

“You sure?” Danny gave her enough leeway to test her leg. When Kat put weight on it and flinched, Danny’s hold tightened again.

“I’m fine. The pain is gone. It’s stiff, but I can manage now,” she said.

But she didn’t push him away this time.

Danny waited for her to make the next move, because he wasn’t sure he could be the one to break their connection. It made him a needy, stupid son-of-a-bitch, but Danny wasn’t sure he could have let go first had his life depended on it.

When his brain, very clearly, reported the fact:
You don’t ever want to let her go
a sudden, fierce fear overtook his body.

Their eyes locked and an overwhelming powerlessness shook him to the core. He felt at her mercy, at the mercy of his intense feelings, and totally vulnerable.

Unacceptable.

It took every ounce of his willpower, but Danny finally loosened his grip enough to pull away. His actions seemed to break the spell and Kat instantly began pushing at him again.

This time, Danny did let her go.

Kat slowly sank to the edge of the bed. “You know, I could have managed fine on my own,” she declared, adjusting her shirt and shooting him a nasty look. “But I suppose you aren’t used to women turning down your ‘services,’ are you? Just for future reference, not every woman in the world is interested in being groped by you. Shocking, I know, but true.”

Her words hurt. Danny didn’t know why and, frankly, he didn’t give a fuck. And the fact that she was getting to him only raised his hackles higher.

“Just for
your
future reference, when someone helps you, the polite thing to do is thank them, not accuse them of being an egotistical asshole.” Danny bent down, bracing his forearms on his thighs, and leaned into her personal space. He made sure her widened eyes were latched onto his before quietly saying, “And I didn’t fucking
grope
you. ‘Cause if I had, you’d be underneath me, screaming my name, right now – and not in the bitchy, uptight way you usually say it, either.”

Her mouth dropped open and Danny smirked before he turning and walking out. He said a bunch of “good-byes’” and “thank yous” and quickly exited the Ciaramitaro house. Nathan and Stella had given him some questioning looks, but, thankfully, they let Danny leave without asking what was up.

He got into the Audi, started her up, and slumped back in the seat.

Danny didn’t want to go home. Not alone. He had too much going on in his head and his body was way too amped up. If he went straight home now, he’d spend all night pushing away thoughts in his silent, empty house.

Fuck that.

He considered calling Rochelle, but quickly decided against it. Hooking up with her two nights in the same week would make him seem interested. And needy. Plus, she’d been nearly intolerable last time and Danny was too raw to put up with any of her twenty-five year old shenanigans tonight.

Another woman, Sabrina, had texted him earlier looking to hang out, but Danny quickly crossed her off the list, too. She was big into the whole let’s-play-cop-and-criminal thing and Danny wasn’t up for any elaborate handcuffing/frisking/blindfolding/gun play tonight.

The reality was there were a lot of women Danny could text who’d probably love to meet up with him tonight, but most of them would require more effort and interaction than he had in him at the moment.

So he headed somewhere safe. Someplace where your mind was too occupied to wander, drinks flowed freely, and there was zero chance of feelings getting involved. Danny wanted a sterile experience where the end result was him forgetting he
had
feelings for a while. And one where he didn’t have to give away even the slightest piece of himself, in any way.

He’d been to
Tessa’s Teasers Gentleman’s Club
a few times for bachelor parties or for fun with some guys from the department. It was in the heart of his and Nathan’s beat and they typically passed it several times each shift.