All My Tomorrows (8 page)

‘He ain’t going nowhere for a while,’ said Ethel as she stepped away from him and eyed the bloodstained brass knob on the end of the bed. ‘That done a lot of damage to his head and could still be the death of him if he ain’t treated quick.’

‘I’ll go to the phone box and ring for the doctor.’

‘You’ll do no such thing,’ snapped Ethel.

‘But if I leave him here he could die and . . .’

Ethel’s expression was grim as she folded her arms and regarded Ruby steadily. ‘Dead or alive, you’re in trouble, gel. If he comes out of this yer life won’t be worth nothing. If ’e dies, then the rozzers and his family will come looking for yer. We gotta get you outta here and long gorn before someone finds him.’

‘But I can’t just leave ’im ’ere to die,’ Ruby protested.

Ethel eased the wrench from Ruby’s tight grip and placed both tools on the bed before embracing her. ‘You ain’t thinking straight, love,’ she said softly, ‘and I don’t blame you after what you been through. But you gotta pull yerself together if yer gunna stand any chance of having a proper life.’

Ruby swiped away her tears with the back of her hand and tried to get her thoughts straight. ‘But it was obviously an accident, Mum. Anyone can see that. We should get him seen to.’

Ethel gave a sigh of exasperation. ‘You ain’t been listening, gel. Accident or not, Ray’s linked to some of the hardest nuts in the East End. They’ll come looking for you, Ruby. You gotta leave London.’

‘But where can I go, Mum? I got no money and I ain’t ever been outside London before.’

Ethel gripped her arms and gave her a none-too-gentle shake. ‘This ain’t the time to be feeling sorry for yerself, Ruby – you gotta think straight and remember how you was before you got mixed up with Ray.’ Her grip loosened and she smiled. ‘You was a tough, no-nonsense little fighter – a right chip off the old block who stood her corner and let nothing get ’er down. You gotta find that old Ruby again if yer gunna come through this.’

Ruby took a deep, shuddering breath and tried very hard to remember that other Ruby – but the last eighteen months had wiped away her self-confidence and changed her into someone she didn’t recognise any more. And yet, she realised, she’d finally fought back tonight, so there must still be a spark of the old Ruby somewhere.

Ethel nodded as if she could read her thoughts and then quickly felt Ray’s pulse again. ‘It’s getting weaker,’ she muttered. ‘We gotta be quick.’

She regarded Ruby solemnly as they stood in the flickering shadows cast by the searchlights flashing intermittently against the shabby walls. ‘Ray lost his temper ’cos you didn’t lock the door. But why was that so important? No one locks doors in this place – unless they got something worth nicking.’

Ruby’s thoughts were clarifying as calm returned and she remembered the short, angry exchange. ‘That’s what I said to him, but he said, “That’s what you think. I don’t make rules for nothing.”’

Ethel nodded and glanced again at the unconscious man on the floor. ‘Flash suits and shoes, gold cufflinks – there’s money coming in from all the illegal booze and fags he’s flogging round the place. He’s got a stash somewhere – I just know it.’

Ruby knew every dingy corner, had been through the dresser drawers only this afternoon to tidy the few bits of clothes. The walls were bare, there was no hatch into the roof and the door was too thin to hide a secret panel.

As the dogfights continued overhead and the evening sky glowed red from the nearby fires, Ruby helped Ethel to move the chest of drawers, and once it was clear nothing had been hidden behind or under it, they tested all the floorboards and then stripped the bed and began to prod and poke at the lumpy mattress.

Ray groaned and they froze.

Ruby and her mother waited breathlessly to see if he was about to come round, the sense of panic rising with each second that passed. But when it became clear he was still out for the count, they frantically resumed their search.

‘I think I’ve found something,’ said Ruby triumphantly from beneath the bed as she began to prod at the one section of skirting board that wasn’t begrimed and rotting. She was aware of her mother scrambling alongside her, but continued to work her fingers over the neatly cut, loose section until it finally fell away to reveal a long, hollowed-out space.

‘I told ya,’ breathed Ethel. ‘What’s ’e got in there?’

Ruby’s scrabbling fingers found a small book, a square tin that rattled, and something that felt solid and heavy, rolled in a piece of material. Handing each item to her mother, she searched for anything she might have missed and, finding nothing, crawled from under the bed to see what she’d unearthed.

Ethel flicked through the little leather-bound book and tossed it aside. ‘You don’t wanna get involved in that,’ she said. ‘It’s his record of his dodgy deals.’ She picked up the square tin and shook it. ‘This sounds more promising,’ she muttered and set about trying to break the lock with one of her hairpins.

As the sounds of the air raid continued all around them, Ruby picked up the material roll and felt the weight and shape of it. The cloth was an old remnant of cotton which was stained with what smelled like oil and she gingerly unwrapped the folds, already suspecting what lay beneath them. As the pistol fell into her lap she shuddered and was about to toss it across the room when her mother’s sharp command stopped her.

‘Don’t touch it,’ snapped Ethel. ‘Wrap it up again and stuff it back into the wall.’

Ruby’s hands were trembling as she did as her mother ordered and tossed the notebook in after it. She wanted nothing to do with either of them, and shivered at the thought of all the nights she’d slept in that bed with that deadly thing hidden less than a foot beneath her head.

‘Don’t worry about that,’ said Ethel as she emptied the metal box onto the bed. ‘There’s enough here to get you out of London and set yourself up somewhere safer.’

Ruby stared in amazement at the rolls of notes, the glittering coins and the countless food and clothing stamps that lay on the mattress. ‘What a bastard,’ she breathed as the anger returned full-force. ‘He kept me short of everything from the moment we was married, and all the time . . .’

She leaped from the bed, resisted giving the recumbent Ray a hefty kick as she stepped over him, and then began to stuff her few bits and pieces into the pannier basket she used to carry her shopping. ‘Put the money and some of them stamps in me handbag, Mum, and keep some for yerself while yer at it.’

Ethel took a few ten-bob notes and some stamps, then stuffed the rest into Ruby’s handbag alongside her ration book and identity card. ‘Gawd knows we’ve earned all of this tonight.’

Ruby finished her meagre packing, discarded the soup-stained dress for a clean one and pulled on her warmest cardigan. Her neck and arm had been slightly scalded by the soup, but the sting of it was manageable. A glance in the mirror showed there was one hell of a bruise blossoming on her jaw and blood had streaked her face from the nasty gash on her head where she’d hit it on the gas fire. The water in the jug had been spilled during the fight, so she couldn’t wash, but luckily there was a raid on and if anyone saw her they’d think she’d come a cropper and was simply one of the many walking wounded.

She reached for the gas-mask box and turned to her mother. ‘I don’t know where to go,’ she said, suddenly afraid to leave her and the only place she’d ever known.

‘Head straight into the city. Find a main line station and get on the first train outta there. It don’t matter where you go, you got money now – just get as far from here as you can.’

Ruby’s fragile confidence fractured. ‘Can’t you come with me, Mum?’

Ethel’s expression was sorrowful as she shook her head. ‘I’m too old and fixed in me ways to do a moonlight,’ she admitted softly. ‘But you got the rest of yer life ahead of you, and the chance to make something of yerself. Get out of this place, Ruby, run for all you’re worth and don’t look back.’

Ruby heard the passion in her words, saw the desperate pleading in her eyes and knew her mother was right. And yet there was danger for Ethel if she stayed here. ‘It ain’t safe, Mum. You gotta come with me.’

Ethel shook her head again. ‘I can handle meself, never you mind, gel.’

Ruby could see she wouldn’t be persuaded and shot a glance at Ray. ‘What about him?’

‘Leave that to me, love.’

‘But Mum . . .’

Ethel enfolded her in a hard embrace. ‘Trust me to do what’s best, love. Now, you take care of yerself, you hear? And don’t write to me, neither. Just send a short note to Fred Bowman at the Tanner’s Arms when yer settled – you can trust him to keep his gob shut.’

‘I’m frightened, Mum,’ Ruby whispered.

‘I know, darlin’, but you gotta do this.’ Ethel cupped her battered face gently in the palms of her work-worn hands and softly kissed Ruby’s lips. ‘I love yer, darlin’. Don’t you never forget that.’

Her mother’s parting words still rang in her head as Ruby darted in and out of the shadows. The enemy bombers had gone now and the rescue services were at full stretch, trying to dowse fires, rescue people trapped beneath shattered buildings, turn off gas mains and defuse unexploded bombs.

Ruby’s tears dried as she stumbled through the smoky darkness that was diffused with the red and orange glow of the many fires. The all-clear had yet to sound and there were still dogfights going on beyond the great clouds of smoke and dust that rose above London’s East End. The once familiar landscape was now confusing. Entire streets were reduced to blackened skeletons, landmarks had disappeared, and roads and alleyways were blocked by vast craters or mountains of smouldering rubble.

Ruby felt a glimmer of her old self returning as she headed towards the city of London. She had to remember she’d been born to the sound of the bells of St Mary-le-Bow and was a Cockney to the very bone: strong, determined and streetwise. She would overcome the events of this awful day and her inner compass would lead her unerringly into the heart of the city – and perhaps to a brighter, more hopeful tomorrow.

Chapter Five

London

RUBY HEARD THE
all-clear sound as she stumbled her way around mounds of rubble. As people who’d spent the raid in tube stations and public shelters came pouring into the streets to stand and stare in horrified fascination and dread at the devastation, she pulled on a headscarf and kept her chin tucked down in case she was recognised.

She’d been walking for some time when she found her way blocked by wardens and a team of soldiers working frantically in the bright lights they’d set up. An unexploded bomb had been found and she had to make a long detour which confused her for a while as she became lost in an unfamiliar maze of backstreets and alleyways.

Despite the confusion and chaos, her inner compass didn’t fail her, and she suddenly realised she was actually walking along the Embankment. The air was full of dust and smoke which stung her eyes and caught in her throat, each cough jarring the bruised muscles in her midriff where Ray had punched her, and sending a shaft of pain through her swollen jaw. But Charing Cross Station wasn’t far away now, so she bore the pain, dredged up the last of her strength and plodded on.

She was not alone, for others were making their slow way through the wreckage, burdened with precious belongings, their faces grey with weariness and set with a stoic determination to make the best of things no matter what they might find at their journey’s end. There were no buses, trams or trolleys running, and the Thames slid past like a grey steel ribbon between the heavy iron and barbed-wire barricades that lined both embankments and surrounded the gun emplacements. London’s skyline was still tinged with red, the billowing, acrid clouds of smoke and ash whipped up by the sudden squall of wind that came down the river.

Ruby stumbled past the Home Guard sentries who stood by the towering stacks of sandbags that shielded the entrance to the huge station building, and entered the concourse. The few dim lights barely cast a shadow and every sound was magnified beneath the vast ceiling which had been boarded over for the duration. A sea of milling people raised their voices to be heard above the shouts of the porters and guards as unintelligible announcements blared from the many loudspeakers and the last few weary stragglers emerged from their shelter in the tube station.

Ruby stood for a moment, wondering what to do and where to go. Charing Cross serviced Kent and the south coast, she knew that much, because some of her neighbours had gone from here to Margate for the day on a factory outing before the war. But the noticeboard was blank, the ticket barriers and platforms were deserted, and the announcer seemed to be telling everyone that there would be no trains running for at least another hour while the tracks were inspected before they could be declared safe.

It seemed to Ruby that despite the noise and the ever-moving sea of people, they were all trapped here, and the thought made her anxious. She needed to get away – needed to find a safe haven where she could rest and try to ease the terrible pain, for her jaw was throbbing so badly it felt as if all her teeth were loose.

‘You look a bit lost, love. Are you all right?’

She looked at the young woman in the guard’s uniform and gave a wan smile. ‘I was just wondering when the trains would get going again,’ she replied.

The girl eyed the dried blood on Ruby’s face and the swelling on her jaw. ‘Depends on how quickly they check the lines and clear any damage,’ she said. ‘It could be hours yet – there again, it could be in the next twenty minutes.’ Her gaze flickered once more over Ruby’s injuries. ‘The Red Cross people are over by platform two if you want to get that cut seen to.’

‘I’ll live,’ she returned with a shrug. ‘What I really need is a cuppa and a sit-down.’

‘Join the club,’ said the other girl with a grimace. ‘I’ve been on my feet for hours and my shift doesn’t finish until midnight.’ She pointed to the other side of the concourse where the WVS had set up a canteen. ‘You’ll get your cuppa over there,’ she said and then hurried off before Ruby could thank her.