All I Want Is You (A Chester Farms Novella) (11 page)

He searched her face for answers and she dropped her gaze to the floor and stepped away. Yep, more on the way. "Did she suspect anything that we should worry about?"

The noise she made wasn't quite a laugh or a shriek. It was something that tightened his gut as she nodded. "You could say that."

He waited for it, not that he knew what he was waiting for. He was clean. It wasn't possible for him to not be clean. There'd never been an incident, a close call, an anything. He’d seen her parts just last night, up close and personal. There was nothing infectious looking down there.

She scratched the side of her head and looked at him. "There's no easy way to say this, so I'm just going to come out with it."

God, there was something and it was untreatable. He started to unzip his pants. He'd looked healthy just an hour ago when he'd taken a piss. "I'm ready."

Her eyes watered. "I'm pregnant."

His mouth opened, then closed. That wasn't—she wasn't—wait just a damn minute. He held her gaze and leaned closer. His throat was tight. "You're...what?"

She stuck hair behind both ears and held fistfuls of it at her neck. "I'm pregnant. We're pregnant. It's yours."

Damn well better be his. Who the hell else's would it be? He shook his head and cleared his throat. Holy shit, his chest was heavy. He opened his mouth three times, but nothing came out.

She lowered to the floor and pulled her knees to her chest. "I've known for a few days. I peed on a stick. Several sticks. It wasn't confirmed until yesterday. I've tried wrapping this conversation around my mind a hundred different ways and I'm left blank at the end each time."

He rubbed over his head. "I thought you were about to tell me you wanted to breakup. Or that you had an STD."

Her eyes widened. "No. No, I don’t want us to breakup. And not just because I’m pregnant now. I was happy." Her gaze veered off to the side. "Perfectly happy."

All that weight on his chest? A lot of it just lifted. "Me too. Still am."

Finally a smile came out of her. A small one, but it was there, pulling at the edges of her lips. She sort of laughed. "We can barely afford to feed ourselves."

Shit. Realization landed hard. Babies were expensive, but soon, so soon, he’d have his raise. By the time the baby was here, he should already have that raise and have money saved up from it. He was practicing every day after work, taking his welds to work in the morning and a buddy would look at it and tell him what to do differently. "When I pass that welding test, it'll be a good pay raise. And I'll start learning to weld pipe immediately after to get another raise. We have nine months—”

"Seven and a half."

He stared at her. The rest of his words were just ripped right off his tongue. "Seven and a half? You're six weeks along?"

"Yeah." She nodded and put a hand over her still flat stomach. "I have a bean. In a few weeks there's going to be a heartbeat."

He sat back in his chair as the room started to spin. My god. He gripped his knees and leaned forward to catch his breath. Seven and a half. That wasn’t enough time. The baby could be here in July. By July, he might have just gained the raise. Might. That was pushing it. Then what if it came earlier? Babies did that.

Planting season was going to arrive in a few short months and put an end to any extra welding time because he was going to help in the fields every chance he got.

He glanced up as she walked past in his nearly empty living room. Weeks ago, he'd been trying to figure a way to save extra money to take her on a date. Now a baby. That was just...he didn't even know. He shook his head. He'd just have to work two jobs. He’d work nights. "There's still time before the baby gets here. I'll be able to take care of you."

She shook her head and rubbed at her temples. “I have no idea what I’m going to do.”

“You’re going to have a baby and I’m going to get a second job and do whatever you need me to do. That’s what
we’re
going to do.”

Tears were in her eyes as she stared at him.

He pushed out of his chair and stood in his living room. A room that was going to be theirs soon. She couldn't live with a baby in the ice cream shop. There wasn't enough room for everything she wanted, let alone everything a baby would need. He didn't know a lot about babies, but he had a little sister. Even at just four years old, he remembered all the bottles, the bed, the stuff. Packages of diapers and then toys all over the place. He held out a hand and pulled her to her feet. "I don't have a lot to offer you right now, but I have a home and I have good insurance."

"Insurance." She blinked. "Are you talking about marriage?"

He nodded. "I'm talking about everything. Being there and doing what needs to be done with you."

She shook her head. "I'm not getting married just because I'm pregnant. I can't do that."

"Tasha."

"No." She shook her head. "No. We barely know each other." She walked away from him to the windows facing the street. "We sleep together and we...."

"And we're good together. You said you were happy. Everything will be easier if we’re married."

She breathed and sat back down with her hands flat on either side of her. "I can't think about this right now. I have to tell my parents. I haven't even told them about the ice cream store and now I have to tell them I'm pregnant." She dropped her face in her hands and said something else, but he couldn’t understand what.

He grabbed her hands, brought them to his chest and held them there. Her fingers were so cold, but he'd warm them in no time. "We don't have to go to the court house this minute. Just think about it. I'm ready for whatever we need to do. And I'm going with you to talk to your folks."

Her eyes grew bigger and lips parted. "Oh, no."

He nodded. "Oh yes. This is half of my doing and half of my responsibility."

"You're a good guy, but this is getting to be too much."

He looked at her and shook his head. "You're not alone in this. I'm not leaving you alone to do this by yourself."

A long breath eased past her lips and she softened to a slouch. "I know. I'm grateful. I don't want to lose you, but like you said, that doesn't mean we have to rush. My parents aren't going to take it well and I think it would be better if I faced them by myself."

He lowered his head and nodded. She knew her parents better than he did. As much as she dreaded telling them about dropping out of college, he couldn't imagine the pressure of telling them they were going to be grandparents. If she didn't want him there for that, there wasn't anything he could do. "I want to know what's going on every step of the way with the baby."

"I'm glad."

"I want to go to your doctor visits with you, if you can make them after three-thirty when I get off work."

Her hand turned against his chest and her fingers laced through his. "I'll see what I can do, but that's right when the shop is the busiest because school is letting out. I need all the customers I can get more than ever now."

He nodded and looked away. She couldn't afford to hire anyone part-time right now. When the baby came in the middle of summer, hopefully the place would be busy enough for a temporary worker. He'd just have to try to take off work in the morning to make those appointments if he had to. And Christ, money. His head swam trying to pull all this together. This was okay. They were going to be okay. It’s not like they were going to be on the streets. His parents wouldn’t allow that, but Patrick wasn’t going there unless they were facing the streets. "When are you going to see your parents?"

"Tomorrow. I was going up Sunday morning to tell them about the shop and come back home around noon."

"If you just want me to drive you and drop you off, I can do that."

"Thank you. That means a lot, but I'll be okay. I just need to get up there and get it over with."

Chapter Ten

Tasha eased on the chair around her mom's kitchen table. God, the times she'd sat in this spot over the years. Homework, eating, baking, talking, card games, and memories had been made in this chair. And now another was about to. One of those rare glimpses of the future popped in her head. A kitchen similar to this one with a daughter doing and learning all the things she had. They'd be healthy, happy. Laughing even. It was all going to be okay once she got through these kind of moments.

The whole trip home she'd tried working out a way to get the truth out. She still had nothing. Just coming out with it worked so well for Patrick, it seemed the best way to go. She caressed the warm side of her hot chocolate mug and faced her parents. "I've wanted to tell you something for months now." She took a big breath. "I dropped out of college."

Her mom blinked. "You what?"

Her dad straightened. "Did you just say you dropped out of college?"

She looked at her mom, then her dad. Patrick was so much easier. She went into that conversation just knowing he was going to be there for her. Her fingers trembled because she knew in her heart she couldn't think the same about her parents. This wasn't just not following the plan. This was stomping all over it. "Yes, I did."

Her mom stared disappointed laser beams at her through her rounded, silver glasses. Her hand extended across the top of the table and perfectly trimmed nails tapped on the wood once. "When?"

Tasha just wanted to hide as all the pride she'd had over everything she'd managed to accomplish just fizzled out with a nauseous turn of her stomach. She couldn’t say if the sickness was from the baby or the situation. "End of last semester. I never registered for the fall. The whole time I was in school, I worked through it. I’m good at working. I’m bad at sitting."

Her mom simply shook her head. "I don't know what you think you're doing, but you're ruining your future. You're going back. You'll carry extra hours for the spring semester, stay in school for the summer and be back on schedule to begin your senior year next fall. You’ll get your accounting degree."

Tasha winced. She doubted maternity leave was included a teacher's syllabus. Pregnancy aside, she wasn't going back to some classroom to sit in rows and listen to someone drone on and on about numbers and calculations. What she'd told Patrick was completely right. More than she'd realized. She was really happy in Bella Warren. With him, with her life. It was crazy, unstable and anything could happen at any time, but through all that, she was somehow in control of it. "No."

Her dad stood from the table and walked through the kitchen. "Yes you will. You need a good education to get a good job. You have a scholarship and you’re not letting that go to waste."

Now for the really hard part and she returned to warming her hands on her mug. Not like she could stomach the drink at the moment. "I’m not going back. I can’t. When I didn’t continue classes into the Fall, my scholarship ended. The stipulation was for four consecutive years with a full class schedule while maintaining a passing grade."

Her mom's mouth dropped and her stuck up posture crumbled. "Tasha Lauren, how could you be so stupid!"

She'd expected that or a dozen other phrases like it that she didn't even blink at the insult. "I'm doing what I love and I'm good at it. For the past three years, I hated going to school and couldn’t wait to get to my evening shift to wait tables. I lived for that job and dreaded the studying. I only went to college to try to make you two happy with me, but I hated every step.”

Her mom groaned. “It’s college, Tasha. Not the end of the world. Not everyone loves school every day of their life, but they go because they know what’s best.”

Yeah, well Tasha never remembered having a day that she loved. “It’s not just school that I don’t like. It’s the sitting. You know in high school, friends used to touch my knee in class to make me stop bouncing it because it was distracting? And I’m just sitting for an hour and half at a time. The idea of sitting at a desk for eight hours every day for the rest of my life makes me sick to my stomach.”

“What are you doing instead? What are you going to do when you get older and need a job to sit at?”

“I won’t be old for years. Right now I’m renting a building in Bella Warren."

Her dad stopped and leaned on the kitchen counter. "Where is that?"

"It's a little south of Warren and a little South east of Little Rock. It's a small town that's barely on a map. You wouldn't know it."

"How do you know about it?"

She smiled. "College."

Her mom pushed away from the table with a disgusted huff. "When you went to college, you weren't supposed to learn how to ruin your life."

"I haven't," she snapped and then winced. They were still her parents and she hadn't meant to get ugly, but damn it, she was trying and it was working. At least working enough that she was able to pay her bills every month and she wasn't having to dip into what few hundred dollars she had left in savings. She was breaking even after groceries and everything and that's farther along than where she started. So what if she didn't have extra money to put back in savings right now. Some people lived paycheck to paycheck for years. She breathed out and let go of her mug before she snapped the handle off. "I own a business there. And it's successful."