All Good Women (52 page)

Chapter Thirty-Three

Spring 1947, San Francisco

GREEK RESISTANCE FORCES FIGHT RIGHT-WING DICTATORSHIP

JACKIE ROBINSON SIGNS CONTRACT WITH BROOKLYN DODGERS

GENERAL ANASTASIO SOMOZA TAKES
OVER NICARAGUA

NEW JAPANESE CONSTITUTION IN EFFECT

MOIRA SAT BACK
in
the overstuffed chair and watched her two daughters playing together. Her daughters. Still, sometimes, she found it hard to believe that she was a mother. She was the mother of these two beautiful — sometimes exasperating — but mostly exquisite children. Tess was more gentle with Clara these days: the two-and-a-half-year-old girl taking care of her one-year-old baby sister, carrying toys to the blanket, clapping and laughing. No doubt this idyll would last only two or three minutes, but Moira was determined to enjoy it. She listened to the sound of Randy's shower, beating steadily against the bathroom wall. This strengthened her calm, more than it might have last month when the pipes were leaking into the apartment below. But leaks could be fixed. Emergencies could be met. Lost safety pins were found — far from delicate gullets. Fights could be patched and marriages continued.

Moira felt she lived in a steadier place now. While she hadn't exactly planned this family, she had always wanted more than one child. After her own experience, she would never condemn anyone to only childhood. Sometimes now, she wondered if the reason she loved Stockton Street was that it provided her with sisters. Occasionally she daydreamed about them all living together in interconnected units. At night after they tucked in their husbands and children, they could sit around the old elephant couch and talk.

Clara screamed. Moira looked up to see Tess pulling away the doll from her sister.

‘Share, Tess; remember what I told you about sharing?'

‘Baby bite doll!' Tess was outraged.

‘It's OK, honey, we'll wash the doll's face before we put her to bed. Be kind to your sister.'

Miraculously Tess obeyed and sat down on the blanket with Clara.

Moira closed her eyes and smiled, pleased with her maternal wisdom, which seemed to evolve from one second to the next. Her own mother, the supreme sage, must have improvised just like this. That knowledge added a certain proportion to life. Having these children brought Moira enormous pleasure — in the love they expressed, in the competence she felt. Of course life wasn't all satisfaction. And she did wonder what she would do when the children were in school. She wondered this, especially, after a visit with Wanda, who seemed to be sailing through her classes at Berkeley. In a couple of years Wanda would be out in the world writing articles and Moira, Moira would be hanging up clothes on the back line. They'd have to move first. The only place to hang clothes in this apartment house was the basement.

Not that Moira regretted her choice. Being a good mother was important. And when the girls were in school, why there was no reason she couldn't do part-time work, maybe even return to school herself. Moira turned the shadow of an idea — which she didn't yet dare share with Randy — that she might become a teacher. She never imagined that she would like children so much. Everyone said she had a flair in groups. Maybe she would mention it to Anna when she came to supper tonight. Anna never laughed at her ideas.

Randy stood over the children, his hair still wet, reaching out to Tess. ‘You going to be good while Daddy is bowling?'

‘Yes, Daddy.' The child allowed herself to be picked up and swung around.

Now Clara was crying. He stopped to lift her and danced them across the room to Moira. ‘When's Anna coming? You want me to help you tuck them in?'

Moira looked at her watch. ‘No, you'd better leave or you'll be late for the team.' She kissed him on the cheek. ‘Say 'night to your Daddy.'

‘'night Daddy.' Tess kissed him.

Clara laughed and clapped her hand over his face. She watched him take the girls back to their blanket and then pick up his bowling ball. He was still handsome although his hair was receding and he was adding a little paunch. Bowling probably wasn't the best exercise, but he liked going out with the boys once a week. She closed her eyes. She never imagined that Randy Girard would grow tame. No, that wasn't the right word. He hadn't become dull, just lost a little of his spark. Wanda said Roy was like this and, in funny ways, the men were similar. Neither one would talk about the war. At least Randy didn't talk to her about it; maybe that was what they discussed at the bowling alley. Both Randy and Roy seemed to have more of a sense of their limits and their purposes than they had a few years ago. Well, that was all to the good if you had other people to support, supposed Moira. Randy picked up his jacket and waved good-bye.

‘Perfect timing,'
Moira said as
she answered the door. ‘I've just got the second one down.'

‘Good.' Anna was out of breath. ‘Actually, I'm a little late. I had to drop Leah and Papa at the movies.'

‘Now just sit and relax,' Moira said. ‘Drink before supper?'

‘Just ginger ale, if you've got it.'

Moira frowned, fixed herself a gin and tonic and brought Anna her soda.

‘Thanks, Moi. Actually, I'm sorry I missed the kids. I haven't seen the girls in months. Do you have pictures?'

Moira took a long sip of her drink, considering that Wanda had not asked for pictures, had not seemed interested even in seeing the real thing. She hoped that her motherhood wasn't going to separate her from Wanda. ‘Since you ask.' Moira smiled and pulled out an album.

Anna sipped her ginger ale and she paged through the album.

‘Oh, here's your mother. She is looking good. In love with her grandchildren!'

‘You think so?' Moira was taken aback by her own pleasure. ‘Yeah, she does enjoy visiting. The miracle is that I almost enjoy having her.'

‘Yes, Papa is in love with Leah. And Daniel is good for her too. Speaking of which, I have news — about a forthcoming member of the family …'

Moira finished her drink. ‘Reuben? He's coming?'

‘No,' Anna sighed. ‘That conference fell through. But,' she brightened. ‘Daniel. Daniel and Rachel are getting married.'

‘Rachel? You mean the one who used to come to the house? And she was in that group with you? I thought you lost touch.'

‘Right. She moved out of town while I was in London and then … well, anyway, she saw Daniel's new law shingle several months ago. She works in the same building. So she knocked on his office door in search of his sister. And fell in love.'

‘Isn't that something. Hey, come tell me more over supper.'

Moira nervously brought out the baked potatoes and chicken. Everything was intact. She pulled the salad from the ice box and poured them each a glass of water.

‘But before we get to Daniel, let's go back to Reuben for a minute. Are things all right?'

All right. How could she answer that question? Reuben was well. He wrote every two weeks as did she. He had phoned on her birthday. He was still planning to come over and rescue them, but the realities of distance and time were more imposing now. She found it was harder to conjure his face at night, so she had taken to looking at his photo before she fell asleep. How much could she tell Moira?

‘It's hard being apart.' She cursed her own restraint. ‘But he promised that he would come over in late summer or early fall. He suggested we meet in the Grand Canyon.'

‘The Grand Canyon!' Moira gulped.

‘Yeah, that's sort of what our relationship is like, with the canyon growing grander by the moment.'

‘Oh, Anna, don't be sarcastic. You love each other. You'll find a way to be together. Just wait.'

‘That's what I've been doing.'

‘But, but …'

‘Listen, Moira, what choice do I have? I have other responsibilities. If Reuben and I can find a way to bridge the ocean, that will be wonderful. If we can't, we'll survive.'

‘That sounds so detached and objective. But I guess you think I'm a hopeless romantic.'

‘Yes,' Anna smiled. ‘I guess I do.'

Moira looked down at her meal, consoled that at least the dinner had been edible.

‘It's one of your charms, Moi.'

Moira pulled a face. ‘People don't take me seriously. They don't think I'm serious.'

‘Oh, quite the contrary.' Anna's eyes filled with affection. ‘If anything, you're more serious about more things than anyone I know. You're passionate and you throw yourself into life. I respect that. Although sometimes I worry about you.'

‘About me? I always land on my feet,' Moira winked. ‘Don't worry about me.'

Chapter Thirty-Four

Spring 1948, San Francisco

USSR AND WEST BATTLE OVER BERLIN
TRANSPORTATION

RACIAL DISCRIMINATION IN HOUSING DECLARED UNCONSTITUTIONAL BY US

SUPREME COURT

ISRAELI INDEPENDENCE WAR BEGINS

200,000 JAPANESE WORKERS WIN STRIKE
FOR HIGHER WAGES

TEDDY KNELT IN
th
e
garden,
lifting the fledgling lettuce head from the planter where she had grown it from seed. Wanda's suggestion, she remembered. Last year all but one of the lettuce heads survived. Anna kept calling her a ‘brilliant gardener', but she knew as well as Teddy that all it took was a little patience and common sense. Teddy inhaled the scent of rich, black dirt and felt the relief of spring. Teddy never counted on a new year until the heavy rains ceased and the ground warmed.

She shifted a few feet and dusted the roots of the next tiny lettuce plant. It was so peaceful here today; she just wished she were sharing it with someone. Perhaps she was destined to garden alone. She knew Anna would enjoy getting her hands dirty, if only she didn't have so many obligations. Leah was growing into a fine companion for Anna. Where the child found her light after such loss, Teddy still wondered. Anna did seem relaxed, despite the huge work load. Moira said she had noticed this, too, when Anna and Leah came over for Clara's second birthday party.

Two years old. Well, Teddy reflected as she sprinkled water on the new plant, it had been ten years since they had all met at Tracey Business School. Ten years, she closed her eyes. Why did time accelerate as you got older? People said it was because you saw time more in proportion to the rest of your life. The longer the past was, the shorter the present seemed to be. But Teddy suspected that it was also because she wasn't paying as much attention as she used to. She didn't anticipate events in the same way; she didn't savor them; she didn't recall them in the same loving detail. She took too much for granted, that was it. Of course this meant that she didn't worry as often, which was an improvement.

One thing she didn't worry about was her tie to Moira. That seemed to be strengthening steadily. She loved Tess and Clara enormously and prided herself on being their favorite aunt, although this was probably just because she had more time for them than Wanda and Anna. It helped, of course, that both the girls looked like Moira rather than Randy. She should get used to Randy. She should practice.

Hummph. She stood to shake the frustration and decided to dig the bed for squash. She enjoyed such physical labor after a week of typing and filing. The soil was loose and moist today, perfect for planting. Of course it wasn't as lush as Wanda's garden, but Wanda got more sun in Berkeley. How proud Wanda had been to show her their garden and the house last week. Teddy would have stayed longer if Angela hadn't been waiting in the city. People never thought to invite Angela with her although she invited their husbands with them. Roy had already been asked to join an optometry practice when he graduated in June. And Wanda was almost finished with classes herself. Teddy wished she could explain to her friend how much she admired her. Wanda still seemed to be questioning her decision to go back to school!

‘Teddy. Soup's on.'
Teddy straightened
and pulled the shovel from the ground, lost in memories of Moira calling from the kitchen and Angela hanging over the back fence.

Now it was Angela calling from the kitchen and lest there be any mistake about it, the fog horn sounded again. ‘Last call, Teddy. It's getting cold.'

Teddy waved and smiled, picking up the trowel and carrying it with the shovel to the back porch. It would be nice if Angela joined her in the gardening, but when you gardened all week for a living, fixing ravioli was more relaxing. And how could Teddy complain? No one could complain about Angela's cooking.

‘Nothing is worse than cold ravioli.' Angela stood with her hands on her hips which had grown considerably broader over the last two years of domestic bliss. Teddy considered Angela affectionately, deciding that the girl could use even more exercise than she got working for her brother Mario's gardening company. It was a healthy, steady occupation. But Angela was still stinging from the months of rejection after returning from the WAFs. All the airline jobs, all the mechanics jobs, went to ex-servicemen. Angela said most of her WAF friends had wound up getting married or doing office work. Teddy wondered what was happening with Vivian.

‘Except perhaps your cold fury,' teased Teddy. She marvelled at how comfortable she was with Angela, despite the woman's unnerving tendency to take care of her.

‘Jolene called while you was in the garden. The baby cut a tooth today.'

Teddy shook her head. ‘I can't believe Jolene has three kids already. I thought that like Moira she was destined for stage and screen and …'

‘Maybe she saw a little too much drama when you was all little.' Angela dug into her ravioli.

‘Too bad Hank didn't learn the same lesson.'

‘Drinking again?'

‘Yeah, Mom called last night when you were out. Arthur had to go over there 'cause Hank was threatening to clobber Beverly. I guess I was kind of silly to think that the drinking died out with Pop.'

Angela regarded her with concern. ‘But Hank's the only one, right? The rest of the Fieldings are doing great. Look at your Mom. She seemed ten years younger than when I first met her. She's loving that little apartment.'

‘Yes, you were right about not pressing her to live here.' Teddy shrugged. ‘Still, it seems a waste to have this place all to ourselves. Just two people.'

Angela raised an eyebrow, wary of the routine conversation. ‘I guess you don't like the food, eh? Not up to par?'

‘No, Angela, it's delicious. I'm sorry. But what's going on with you. You're hiding something. I can tell by your expression.'

‘Where did you learn to read minds?' Angela was annoyed, then amused. ‘All right, I was going to keep it for tonight. But I got you a surprise. For our anniversary.'

Blushing, Teddy accepted the envelope. She opened it slowly. ‘Tickets. Train tickets.' She was bewildered.

‘To …'Angela prompted.

‘Seattle!' Teddy exclaimed. ‘To see Dawn and Sandra. Oh, Angela, this is too expensive. We can't afford … I don't know if I can get off work … I …'

‘Non-refundable.' Angela sat back, with her arms across her chest. ‘You'll just have to ask old Whitney to let you off. Listen,' she leaned forward, ‘you've been promising to visit them for years. And we've never gone on a trip together. Why I don't think you've left this house for more than a weekend since you moved in.'

‘Not for more than a night.'

The phone rang. Teddy jumped to escape the explosion of feelings. It was a wonderful surprise, she insisted to herself as she hurried to the phone. It would be terrific to see Dawn and Sandra.

‘Hello,' she said absently.

‘Teddy, you OK?' asked Moira.

‘Yes, and you, Moi?' She wondered how Moira always managed to call when she was in the middle of a serious discussion with Angela.

‘Fine, only wanted to say hello. Is this a good time? I waited until Saturday because gruesome Mr Whitney shriveled me through the phone the last time I called you at work. I'm sorry if this is the wrong moment.'

‘Moira, you're never going to stop apologizing, are you?' How could she excuse herself when Moira was so nervous about phoning at the wrong time. Now, as so often, she felt she had to choose between annoying Angela and hurting Moira. ‘I'm fine, just fine. Angela just bought two tickets for us to visit Dawn and Sandra in Seattle.'

‘That means you'll leave the house?' Moira's voice was cool.

‘Just for ten days or so. Don't you think it's safe?' Teddy felt the anxiety rising again.

‘Safe, yes, of course, I'm just being silly. I've never known you to leave the place and I guess, I don't know, I guess that I like to think of you there …' Covered with embarrassment, Moira abruptly shifted gears. ‘The girls are fine. Tess seems more of a lady every day now.'

‘Yeah, sorry I couldn't make Clara's birthday party. Did she like the doll?'

‘Oh, Teddy, I'm sorry, of course that was one of the reasons for calling you. Yes! She loved it. She's playing with it right now. God, you know I can't believe sometimes that I have responsibility for these two human beings and that I
like
it. I bet you never would have thought.'

‘I always knew you were loving,' Teddy said. ‘You just needed to get used to people needing you.'

‘And you needed to get used to people not needing you, to living your own life after taking care of your family and the Stockton Street girls.'

‘Hmmm,' mused Teddy.

‘So I think the trip is a great idea.' Moira's voice grew stronger. ‘Anyway, tell me, how is Angela?'